2018-03-20: Aggressive Friendship Establishment

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  • Log: Aggressive Friendship Establishment
  • Cast: Xantia, Lydia Seren
  • Where: Plains of the Goddess
  • Date: March 20th, 2018
  • Summary: Lydia arrives at the Carakin intent on befriending a weirdo. Things get a bit awkward when this weirdo turns out to know things she shouldn't.

=========================<* Plains of the Goddess *>==========================

The Plains of the Goddess consist of an enormous prairie that occupies the heart of the Meribus continent. It is the breadbasket of the world of Lunar; Althena's blessing lives strong in the soil, and the crops grown here are healthy, hearty, and free of disease. As a result of this bounty, the vast majority of the Plains are uncultivated; farmers have little reason to expand into the untamed wildlands when their larders and storehouses are filled to bursting.

Only a few roads cross the Plains of the Goddess, linking the major cities to each other, with the ruins of Vane at the hub of a wagon wheel. Althena's Guard patrols the highways regularly, making travel (relatively) safe. Anyone heading deeper into the fields does so at their own risk, however.

BGM: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Qi_p5wdBrXw
<Pose Tracker> Xantia has posed.

Some time ago, following the battle against the Lord of Calamity, Xantia, like many others, was whisked away to Lunar. Severely exhausted from pushing her limits far further than she should have, and having the misfortune of being seperated from everyone else, she spent the next several hours face-down in a forest clearing. Curious woodland creatures eventually ventured out to examine the fallen girl, creating a scene not unlike that of a fairy tale, akin to a princess surrounded by her animal friends. If the princess wasn't the particularly graceful kind, and was just lying there motionless in the mud.

And if the princess then suddenly leapt up and started slaughtering all the animals in sight, ravenously devouring anything she could get her hands on. It could happen. Fairy tales get pretty gruesome sometimes.
5rThe most essential element for survival covered, Xantia wandered for a time, looking for, well, anything familiar, anything at all. A lush green forest of that size made her suspect that she wasn't in the Badlands anymore, but who could say for sure. The sight of a small farming community was thus a sight for sore eyes. Hopefully they would be able to tell her in which direction to go to get back to familiar territory.

Unfortunately, Xantia had made a small oversight. Nothing that she ever considered might be problematic at all. But for some reason, the village's inhabitants seemed to take offense to the fact that she was still covered in blood and animal guts. An unfortunate pitchfork incident later, Xantia had concluded that wherever she'd ended up, the people were oddly unfriendly, and it might be best to avoid the locals until she found her way back to somewhere she recognized.

Obviously, there was little chance of that happening. Despite wandering for many days, nothing looked familiar in the slightest. Not even the night sky seemed the same, somehow, though she couldn't quite put her finger on the reason for that. That shouldn't have been a problem though. She did alright for herself when she was alone before. She'd just have to put herself back in the same mindset as back then.

That wasn't as easy as she thought. She lacked any memories back then, so there wasn't anything much she could miss. A year's worth of memories gave her plenty of things and people to miss. The thought of never seeing anybody she'd met during that year ever again was more painful than she'd ever imagined. But there was little else to do than to just... Keep going. Keep searching. Keep hoping.

Eventually, she was discovered by Metal Digger Locus, in the little temporary hideout she made herself in the Sluice Forest, not in the best of states and moods because of having had to fend off some enterprising bounty hunters looking for the bloodthirsty monster that looked like a girl with an X emblazoned on her chest. Entrusted with Carina's best/worst kept secret, it was decided on the spot that she would learn to be a hero, acting as a sidekick to Metal Digger Locus whenever the opportunity should arise.

And thus, she was led back to the Carakin, which is where we find ourselves now, Xantia pacing about inside like a caged animal. Though not actually caged, it more or less feels like it since she's learned that Fei was seen in Vane, but she discovered in no uncertain terms that she absolutely needs to take it easy after overdoing things the way she did. Case in point, she soon brings up a hand to her forehead, feeling the dizziness return again, requiring her to sit down once more. Still not in a good enough shape to move around a lot. How long is this going to take?

A bottle of Jay's well-known relaxants sits on the table nearby, sorely needed because Xantia finds it very difficult to rest much otherwise. She's never been much of a fan of just sitting around, but in the current situation, it's that much more impossible.

<Pose Tracker> Lydia Seren has posed.

Lydia kicks the door in.

"Yo weirdo!" She shouts, clambering in. "Let's be friends too!"

She stares at Xantia for a long moment. "...UH."

She looks away. She looks at Xantia. She looks away. She looks at Xantia. "OR NOT, UP TO YOU I GUESS." She shovers her hands in her pockets. "...Cause, I mean, uh." She trails off and then she kicks the door back out.

"...You uh." Pause. "Said that right? It was you? So like, you're bizarre as heck but like. I'm down."

Pause. "To be friends." Pause.


"Are you dating Carina? Like is a mask what you gotta do? Just ... ... ... curious."

Yeah Lydia is this type.

<Pose Tracker> Xantia has posed.

Xantia has a great deal of experience being confused by things. It doesn't happen quite so often anymore that she has absolutely no idea what's happening. However, this is one of those time.

When the door is suddenly kicked down, Xantia instantly flies over the back of the couch she was sitting on with a "Wah!!" The following one-sided conversation has to be held with Xantia peeking out from behind the couch, then slooooowly rising back to her feet, blinking blankly as the bombardment of words. What a role reversal, she's usually the one subjecting people to those. Evidently she isn't always in her element dealing with that sort of thing herself.

"You are... Lydia?" Let's establish that first of all, things were all a bit hectic back when all that happened. That said, Xantia immediately frowns, establishing the ground rule, "I'm okay with being friends, but not if you're going to call me weirdo! It's Xantia! ...with an X!" Wow, it's been a while since she's introduced herself that way. It feels a bit weird now for some reason. Did she really used to say that all the time?

With a shrug, she vaults over the couch, quick to assume a smile again. "Are you doing better now? I mean, you're acting like you're doing better, but are you really?" She pauses, then proceeds to gloss right over the 'dating' part to correct, "Actually, I'm Metal Digger Locus's sidekick now! I'm gonna be a hero, too!"

Another pause, then she slaps her hands over her mouth. "Gah, I wasn't supposed to say all those secrets out loud!" Not that they were likely to be secrets for very long anyway, if they ever were to start with.

<Pose Tracker> Lydia Seren has posed.

"I don't mean anything bad by weirdo, just so you know, most people I know are weirdos honestly. Like Ethius is one of my favorite dudes and he's the weirdest of weirdos but I'll call you Xantia if you prefer that." Lydia says. She does have a bit of a motormouth herself but that will be made more apparent since that was honestly low grade Lydia there. "Yeah I guess I'm also sorry for trying to beat you up even if it wasn't really me. I guess. I mean. I don't know. It was a while ago. Am I supposed to still be sorry for that? I guess so so I'm sorry about that." Pause. "So your name is Xantia? With an X? Huhhhh...." She trails off for a moment before adding, "It sounds like a kind of drug. I want to get high on Xantia."

She shakes her head. She doesn't really get a comment on the dating thing but in her mind someone who is being Carina's sidekick is probably going to date her. That's just natural, isn't it? "Anyway, uh, I tend to speak before I think just so you know but I owe you. So. Uh. Anyway, you don't gotta worry, Carina let us know the secret stuff..." She turns dramatically to the side. "I know your secret...Mystery Hero X."


"...No, still not really getting used to that kinda nonsense." She mutters to herself before adding, "Yeah I'm fine. More or less. Enjoying the moon?"

<Pose Tracker> Xantia has posed.

Xantia only nods vigorously to the assertion of just calling her Xantia. She doesn't actually embrace her weirdness so much, reminders of how weird she is all the time wouldn't be great. She also doesn't really want to go into that, so she doesn't actually say anything until apologies happen, which causes her to shake her head. "You don't need to be sorry for that at all. It's like you said, right? You weren't really you. Nobody can blame you for that." If that was something people could blame you for, someone like Xantia who doesn't even remember her true self would need to be blamed constantly. That wouldn't be great.

At least she can state one thing about herself with reasonable certainty. "...I'm pretty sure I don't have anything to do with drugs." Pretty sure. But now she's started thinking about it. "I hope not, anyway. I don't think I'd like being named after a drug."

While certainly not an authority of what is or not natural, Xantia does know what it's like to speak without thinking. Lydia is making it feel like that could be a whole lot worse, though. And now she feels bad for thinking that. And even worse because she failed to react to the dramatics, just standing there dumbly when her 'secret' identity is revealed. Only far too late does she goes, "...oh! Oh... oh no?" Absolutely can't even fake it. She rubs the back of her head awkwardly. "I guess I don't really care that much about the whole secret identity thing, but it's supposed to be a part of this stuff, you know?"

It only gets more awkward when asked if she's enjoying the moon, promping a sour expression. "It's awful. People were mean to me for no reason, and I've been all alone, and I need to find my friends, but then I have this stupid dizziness--" She merely has to mention it for it to trigger again it seems, as she winces, and slowly sits back on the couch. "Ugh, there it is again. I wonder what went wrong." Could it be 'fighting three big bosses in a single day'? Naaaah, that seems unlikely.

Best to just focus on other people at times like this. Once her head clears enough to look back at Lydia without seeing three Lydias, she smiles again. "I'm glad you're doing okay, though. You should be careful with those... things that you have. I don't think a lot of people can fix those." Who need clarity, right? Surely Lydia will know what she's talking about.

<Pose Tracker> Lydia Seren has posed.

Lydia is blissfully ignorant on the fact that Xantia has a secret mysterious backstory and will probably assume attempts to make her realize that Xantia has a secret mysterious backstory is just part of the superhero thing and is also making fun of her.

Lydia's cheeks puff out though as Xantia fails to dramatically react to being outed and then trying to pretend she cares. She flops onto her back and starts laughing hysterically. This probably lasts a while and she tries to stop a few times before collapsing back into a giggle fit.

But it does stop eventually and she says, "Yeah sure. I'm not sure what rules y'all are talking about. I guess it's part of the fashion." Lydia prefers to not wear a mask. It's not as if she can hide who she is in the first place.

"You're probably still recovering from all that nonsense you had to do while we were gettin' here. Fighting that much for that long ain't natural." She tilts her head before adding. "Not good for the body or anything I figure. Jay's right to ask you to take it easy." She frowns. "...But hey, s'long as you're here, if folks try bein' mean to you for no reason, I know how to deal with those types, don'tcha worry. I'll make 'em regret it."

Her back tendrils form question mark shapes. "Huh? What things?" Lydia looks over her shoulder. "These things?" Pause. "I don't know their deal. That's my superhero backstory."

<Pose Tracker> Xantia has posed.

Xantia's distressed expression while Lydia is laughing probably doesn't help it last any less long. Poor girl has absolutely no clue what she did that was so funny. She didn't do something weird again, did she? How is she supposed to react to a situation like this? She can't figure it out, so she just waits for it to end, when mercifully it isn't made a big deal of beyond that.

She similarly shrugs to the notion of superhero rules. "I don't know who made the rules, but it was probably someone who knows how you should do these things. They wrote books about it and everything." Possibly she's talking about fiction, Xantia fails to tell the difference a lot.

Nodding a bit, she agrees, "That's what Jay told me, that it was... o-ver-ex-er-tion." She sounds it out like the word was in a foreign language. It might as well be, it's certainly not something that Xantia's ever had to worry about before. "I wouldn't know what's natural, anyway." She adds that bit casually, but some vague sadness may be detected. More of that weirdness awareness.

It passes quickly, Lydia's promise to make mean people regret prompting a chuckle. "Well it's not like I can't just punch people or anything, it's just... you know. Not fun."

Xantia doesn't even blink at Lydia's tendrils, because clearly those aren't weird at all. "I mean the things inside you. You know, the things that make the glowy patterns, that Lily also has? They didn't fix themselves after--" Oh, wait a second, this is awkward to bring up, isn't it? Xantia looks a bit apologetic, but she finishes the sentence anyway. "...after you bit her." She quickly holds up her hands as if to intercept any possible apology. "But it's okay now! Nothing to worry about! I fixed it, it's all better now!"

<Pose Tracker> Lydia Seren has posed.

Lydia rubs at her nose faintly with her wrist. She studies Xantia's expressions carefully and then she looks away. "You worry too much about that," Lydia says, regarding the rrrrules. She dusts herself off and adds, "Overexertion." to help Xantia out. She tilts her head as she listens to Xantai further, particularly when it comes to what's natural or normal.

"Yeah, but I can insult them for you." Lydia says, apparnetly figuring that's not something Xantia's good at. But regardless, she rubs her neck lightly and adds, "Well, if you're getting headaches, it probably means you're dehydrated from doing all that. So that's what I mean by 'not natural'. Sure, you can do it, but your body doesn't seem to like it." She shrugs her shoulders. "Doesn't really matter how other bodies can handle it. Doesn't factor in. You care a lot about how people see you, huh?"

But then the matter about the glowing circuit panels is mentioned. Lydia honestly hadn't been thinking about it and she blinks a few times. "Oh uh. I think that was temporary. The glowy patterns hadn't happened again." Lydia says, shaking her head. "I'm not sure why I bit her, to be honest. It's honestly kinda gross and it's put me off biting and I love biting so it's kinda hard to stick to it but..." She frowns. "...It was like something was inside me telling me to take what she had. Maybe..." She shakes her head. "...I don't know."

But Lydia doesn't seem to angst over her new weird blood much. Not anymore at least. "It's kinda amazing you were able to. I couldn't. I mean, maybe I could've, but I was too nervous to try." She tilts her head. "How'd you do it?"

<Pose Tracker> Xantia has posed.

It's Xantia's turn to have a good laugh when Lydia adds the insult factor into things, though it doesn't last nearly as long as Lydia's earlier outburst. "I guess so!" is all she can add to that. Right on the money. In the heat of the moment, insults don't even really come to Xantia's mind. She figures she'd probably mess them up somehow anyway, it's not like she even knows what many of them are supposed to mean.

She hmms, considering the explanation what might have happened. "I don't know if it's that, I mean, my head doesn't hurt or anything. I just keep seeing double and losing my balance, it's weird." She stops theorizing after Lydia correctly points out one of her hangups, one look at her expression enough to tell it's both true and Xantia is very surprised that it showed. She looks away at that, speaking a bit more softly than before. "I just... don't want people to look at me like the people in that village did." She didn't tell that whole story, but from what she said earlier about her experiences on Lunar, one can assume.

Clearly much more comfortable with topics that shift the attention away from herself, Xantia nods several times, theorizing, "Well okay, but what made that happen is probably still there, even if you can't see it." And immediately feeling awkward again because where the heck did that thought even come from? She looks a little distant and zoned out following that, trying in vain to figure out what is making her have opinions on things that she doesn't remember learning about. Until she's asked how she did it, which prompts a reaction befitting someone who's quite obviously trying to hide something, "Oh, uh, I... I dunno! Must've been something I read somewhere once, hahaha!" It's not, it's totally not, she knows that much for certain.

Being completely unable to keep up an act like that, Xantia sighs deeply and hangs her head. "No... that's not right. It's just... something I know about, somehow, and I don't even know what it actually is." She raises her head, frowning a bit as she suddenly wonders aloud, "You did know that I have amnesia, right? I guess maybe not..."

<Pose Tracker> Lydia Seren has posed.

Lydia doesn't really need to know the exact story. She knows what it's like being given strange looks whether it be for reasonable reasons (showing up to town covered in blood) or not (being a beastman or having an unusual appetite).

"Yeah, I feel ya." Lydia says to Xantia, walking closer to press a hand on her shoulder. "But it doesn't matter what ya do. There will always be people starin' at you like those people. I guess that's why I can't watch my mouth too hot, you know? I self-censored a lot in the past and now I just kinda let loose with it 'cause I can."

She is a little antsy herself talking about this subject but she considers it important enough to talk about anyway. "Anyway, you do you and all that, but y'can care about others without ceding your sense of self to 'em. That's what I think at least."

She quirks her head a little bit. "Sorry, I guess it's something that hits a little close to home for me too, y'know?" She smiles, more genuinely even if she's red in the face and clearly embarrassed by it all. "So uh. Anyway. You helped me out. So at least for me, just be yourself."

Oh she has amnesia.

"Or you know, do whatever you want." Lydia segues easily, thinking about it. "But you still were able to do it, so I guess there's some muscle memory or something that still remembers even if you don't. That's a hopeful sign, I figure. Maybe you should write down how you did it next time you did it so you don't forget. Or describe it out loud," She clarifies. "And have 'em write it down. Scientific method, yo." Pause. "Thanks for helping her though. I owe her one too after all."

She looks at her arm thoughtfully. They don't come back, but to be honest she doesn't know much about her arm. Either way, right now she'd rather try to give Xantia a hand. She's saying some concerning things.

"Maybe you need glasses?" Lydia says. "Or there's some other damage to your eyes... If you're not headachey I mean. I wonder if I could make a pair to test this with..." She mulls to herself. If you're not careful you'll get a character redesign. Or an alt costume at the best.

<Pose Tracker> Xantia has posed.

Xantia appreciates the attempt at comfort, even if she doesn't understand absolutely everything Lydia is saying. The sentiment is plenty clear for her to smile and respond, "I know I'm stronger than most people, but... people like you who can just not worry about what anybody thinks are probably stronger. That's what I think."

She doesn't get hung up over the poor wording in regards to someone who has amnesia, instead using it to help further explain, "I don't know what I used to want, but... right now I just want to get along with everybody. Except bad guys. Bad guys need to be punched until they stop being bad." It's a simple philosophy, but it works for her. For the most part. She's discovered plenty of times that things aren't always as simple as she would like them to be.

Though embarassment isn't one of them, Xantia has a whirlwind of emotions going on about the topic which she can't begin to make sense, so that also contibutes to her not really discussing it at length. Instead, she just holds her hands palms-up, because the topic of what she can do is a lot simpler. To talk about. Not necessary to explain. "Well, it's easy to do, you can't just heal something like that..." Her left palm glows with a soft white light. "You have to break down what's broken completely, so you can make it back into what it used to be." Her right palm grows with a bright red light. "But you have to do both at the same time, or it won't work." She brings her palms together, combining both lights into a muted orange. "...well, maybe it can, but when it's a living person..."

Abruptly, the light emitted from her hands fades away. "...anyway. I don't know how I do it, or how I know how to do it, or how I even know how these things are supposed to work so I can fix them... I just looked at Lily and knew I could fix it, so I had to." She smiles, feeling suddenly awkward. "That probably didn't make any sense, I just don't know how else to say it."

...and then she's suddenly hit with the glasses remark. "Wha-- why glasses? I'm not blind!" Has Xantia been under the impression that glasses cure blindness all this time? It's certainly possible. Let's be honest, would that really be the weirdest thing she's claimed today?

<Pose Tracker> Lydia Seren has posed.

The power of destruction, the power of restoration, Xantia seems to have both. Perhaps destruction and creation are intrinsically linked.

Lydia doesn't think these things because she doesn't have nearly enough of a WISDOM state for that but she does listen and seem to understand what Xantia does if not the how. "Huh... you break it down then you fix it back up. But people aren't machines, exactly. If you turn a person into its base components and then return those components back into human form--it's not gonna suddenly bring 'em back to life. But I'm not a doctor so I guess if it works, it works. That kind of power's pretty unusual."

The metal tendrils whirble a little as Xantia shows off her energies.

"Pah," She adds. "It's nothin' you can't do," with regards to who is stronger than who. "Otherwise I'd be keepin' my trap shut."

"Thanks though. Healing people, it's a pretty nice talent. Even better than punching. By a little."

Lydia blinks and shakes her head. "There's all sorts of corrective lenses." Lydia tells Xantia. "Sometimes your vision's just a little off and glasses fix the problem. If you're up for doing some impromptu vision exams, I could probably make some lenses for you then Carina can probably fit 'em for you in something nice and trendy. Course we'd have to see if they fix the problem first."

<Pose Tracker> Xantia has posed.

Xantia reacts like this conversation is an entirely normal one to have. "Well of course not, you can't just break a whole person down. You just have to break down the machines inside of them and put them back together, reconnect things so they're the way they're supposed to be." Of course there's machines, didn't she mention the machines? She's pretty sure she's been using the word 'fix' a lot. Xantia's word choices tend to be pretty deliberate, she says exactly what she means. "I'm not a doctor either, but I know you can't do something like that without hurting people, so you have to keep healing them constantly while you do that." She makes it sound so simple, doesn't she?

And yet, when all's said and done, when Lydia calls it better than punching, she shrugs. "I like the punching better, really. It's a lot simpler, more fun. And it doesn't make you get all cold." Still the same old Xantia, in the end.

If there was any doubt of that, she throws an actual tantrum when the glasses are expanded upon. "But I don't want any glasses! They're just gonna get in the way, and get broken all the time, there's no point! Besides, I can see fine normally, it's just, right now I'm... things are a little weird, okay?" She crosses her arms, pouting. "It'd be really dumb if I could heal myself but couldn't heal my eyes, what's even the point of having these powers then?"

<Pose Tracker> Lydia Seren has posed.

Lydia's expression goes flat as Xantia starts explaining in even more detail. No. Not flat exactly. It's more like she's not sure how she is supposed to be expressing herself. how weird!

"H..hey... You don't need 'em if you don't want them." She says, handling Xantia's tantrum first. "Geeze, I'm just sayin'. Maybe it's something else."

But she doesn't put up much of an argument because of what Xantia said earlier. She is quiet for a moment before...

"How'd you know they're machines?" Lydia asks. "Are you using something similar to what I am using?" She walks closer and since she was already close, that's something. "I only told Lily...that I thought there were machines in there. Maybe you could've guessed but..."

But Xantia hasn't really given off the impression tha she would have before. "...You think everybody has machines inside of 'em?"

<Pose Tracker> Xantia has posed.

Xantia, true to form, completely fails to notice that something she said caused an unusual reaction. She didn't need to be distracted by another topic and go into a tantrum over it for that to happen. There's just a lot of things she doesn't notice. And then there are other things that she shouldn't notice, but she evidently does. That's just the way things are for her, so nothing feels particularly off in that regard. Thus she can just say, "Okay, good!" when Lydia backs down from the glasses easily enough, quickly full of cheer again.

Only for her to look confused when she abruptly notices the mood changed for a reason she doesn't understand. "Huh--" For some reason, there was an impulse to defend herself just now. Something about the words and the increased proximity making her feel unsafe. She pushes that aside, though. These are reasonable questions. She should answer them reasonably. Or as reasonable as she can, anyway.

"I... I wish I could tell you. I just saw those glowing patterns, and I felt like I knew what made them happen. It... wasn't a guess. I know. But I don't know how I know."

While not exactly intimidated, Xantia certainly doesn't feel comfortable, prompting her to slide a bit further away across the couch. Is this still a friendly conversation? Somehow, it doesn't feel like it. "I don't think I have them myself... I don't think most people do. I don't know why those who have them do." Getting less and less sure of what's going on, she ventures, "...It's the truth. You believe me, right?"

<Pose Tracker> Lydia Seren has posed.

Lydia blinks several times. She sits down on the couch next to Xantia. She doesn't look at her for several moments. She's not sure what's going on. Or why she even really cares to begin with. She just looks kind of vaguely glum herself. Why does she care? She doesn't care. She decided it wasn't important. "I was just...worried. Thinking." Lydia says. "If you can detect it, and it has some sort of commonality between me and other people, and it's not just Lily and me." She frowns. "...I guess it's the scientist in me."

She glances to Xantia. "Why wouldn't I believe you? I don't think yer capable of lying. Anyway--sorry for getting weird there. I never told anyone it was machines except for Lily, and it was just something I 'knew', you know? So that you knew too, I was...I dunno. About that. Yeah."

<Pose Tracker> Xantia has posed.

If Lydia doesn't know what's going on, Xantia doesn't have a chance. Things suddenly just felt tense there for a second. That quickly falls away when Lydia sits down, because that glum look just has the effect of instantly making Xantia feel more like providing cheer, if possible. But then she's not sure if that would be appreciated. So awkward. Can she at least dispel those worries?

"Well... I can't actually detect it, so you don't have to worry about that," she starts, trying her best. "It's just those glowing patterns that made it obvious. ...and I don't even know why it's obvious to me. Maybe that means I'm a scientist too." She lets that one hang there a second, before laughing. "Not very likely, huh?"

Taking the assessment of being incapable of lying as a compliment, she feels the need to apologize herself now. "Ah... sorry, I didn't mean anything by it, it just... felt like I had to be careful what I said." She's not about to start lying about things now. "Sometimes it feels like people want me to say certain things, or not say certain things, and I don't really know what they want, so I get unsure if I'm doing the right thing. I don't want to upset anybody. So... sorry if I did that."

She leans back on the couch, musing, "What an odd thing to have in common. Especially if you don't also have amnesia." A pause. "...You don't, right?"

<Pose Tracker> Lydia Seren has posed.

"No," Lydia says. "I don't have amnesia."

She glances to Xantia. "Ehh, I don't know what I wanted you to say, but thank you for being honest with me. I guess... I guess what bugs me is that I don't understand how I work anymore. I mean, I guess I never did, but I knew the basic details. Now it's hard just to get my arm to stay an arm. And I have no idea if Kalve's actually helping me because let me tell you, it sure doesn't feel like it's helping, but I mean I get it--it's probably one of those things that take forever, but I will keep at it and maybe then my bloody arm will stay an arm when I want it to be an arm. Maybe make that shit on my back go away because that's sure awkward on Lunar."

She hakes her head. "A..anyway. I hadn't done that before. And I hadn't done it since. I think it was trying to...take what Lily had for itself, but I don't know if it's still in me. I'll be careful, I guess. It probably would be hard to fix but--hey--if I break I know at least one person who can lend a hand now so..." She shrugs. "Thanks for letting me know."

She pauses. "Anyway, uh, don't censor yourself for my behalf. I'd rather be pissed by your honesty than happy cause of your lie. If that makes any sense."

<Pose Tracker> Xantia has posed.

Xantia refrains from comment on the lack of amnesia. Weirdly mixed feelings on that sort of thing, since it does create a sort of bond but it's not like she'd ever wish it on anybody.

It's also hard to comment on not being able to have your arm stay an arm, because she sure can't imagine what THAT must be like. But she can at least sympathize with, "I don't really understand how I do the things I do either. But... I feel like I'm getting more used to it, and better at it, the more I do with it. So I'm sure you'll figure things out!" It wouldn't be Xantia if there wasn't a positive outlook in the end.

Where it comes to Lily, she can only say, "Lily needs what she has. I mean... she really needs it. So... I really hope that won't happen again." She doesn't really want to spell out the full details, but the gist should be clear enough from just that. "To be honest, I'm a little afraid of having to use my power to fix anything like that again... but, I'll try my best to help either one of you if necessary!"

Where it comes to the self-censoring, she can only smile to Lydia. "That's good. I don't think I'm capable of lying either."

<Pose Tracker> Lydia Seren has posed.

"...Yeah. I hope it doesn't happen either." Lydia says. "...I did it, but I didn't want to do it. I feel a little gross about it still, honestly, even knowing that whatever happened was done ages ago."

She lowers her head for a moment.

"...Heh. Dunno why you're worried about healing people. But I don't exactly want to get hurt either. So I'll do my best so you don't gotta worry about it. You're a good one, Xan."

She will give Xantia a quick arm hug and then probably bug her for a while about miscellaneous pointless things.