2018-04-14: A Good Parent
- Log: A Good Parent
- Cast: Fei Fong Wong, Riesenlied
- Where: Vane
- Date: 14th April 2018
- Summary: Fei and Riese decompress and speak of parenthood and children.
<Pose Tracker> Fei Fong Wong has posed.
Fei Fong Wong is drained and frankly kind of miserable. It's hard trying to lift himself out of depression and it's even harder trying to lift other people up from their own depression. He isn't really doing his best today and he's expecting, when he returns to Vane, that he'll probably have dreams full of nightmares, death, and ominous foreshadowing. It's not as fun as it sounds.
But instead, Fei is greeted to a new sight. It's an obstacle course. There's already some local school children playing around it, in fact. One is balancing over a rickety balance beam and another is climbing Tarzan ropes, and of course there's the cardboard alligator currently fighting a small girl with a wooden sword.
Fei drops his packs to the ground and stares at this. How long...was he gone?
He does not rush onto the playground to participate in the course himself, but he does seem kind of shellshocked there for a bit.
And then he places his hand against his forehead and he starts laughing in relief. Sometimes it's the little things that restore some faith in humanity. And in your humanity.
<Pose Tracker> Riesenlied has posed.
Riesenlied has also been rather drained, physically as much as she is mentally and emotionally. Noeline's mentioned to her that she saw-- 'something'... was something leaking out of her memories? She's not sure, but she knows she's got to spend the next couple of days recovering after giving it her all in Glenwood.
She's seated over the side of a see-saw, with Mikaia on the other as she chatters about the things she's learnt to cook from Argus. And Janey's actually spending a bit of time hanging upside down from the jungle gym.
"... oh, Fei?" Riesenlied asks.
<Pose Tracker> Fei Fong Wong has posed.
That sounds kinda spooky, to be honest, missing memories, strange interactions with your friends that you haven't seen, nor recall...
Fei smiles as he catches sight of Janey, Mikaia, and Riesenlied. They're cute kids. And also there's Riesenlied of course.
He leaves his bags behind for the moment. He seems confident they won't get swiped. He makes his way to the seesaw and adds, "Did you set this up Riese? It's pretty well made especially since it's only been a few days since I was last here."
He leans against the slide. Hopefully it won't be such a lean that it falls over. "You've really taken to motherhood." He tilts his head. "Gotta say, it's nice to see something like this sprouting up."
<Pose Tracker> Riesenlied has posed.
"No, it wasn't me..." Riesenlied expresses very gently, tilting her head. "There were some others who set this up overnight, but I-- was asleep and resting from illness when this was all set up. So it was like a miracle to see this!" She expresses with warmth and happiness in her voice.
She looks towards Fei, and perhaps she's known him long enough to express, "Thank you... I feel like it did come rather naturally, myself..." A pause. "Are you doing all right...?" Angelic Pretty
<Pose Tracker> Fei Fong Wong has posed.
"Overnight." Fei says. "I can't imagine a single person could have done this in one evening." He cups his chin thoughtfully. "I mean...it's definitely not up to code... maybe I should go in when I have a chance and clean some of it up." He pauses. "Or would that... hurt the appeal in a way... Sometimes something a little rough, a little dangerous, is good for kids."
He closes his eyes, thinking about this perhaps more seriously than he really should bother with.
But then he looks back to Riesenlied with a faint smile, opening his eyes again. "Well, it's a little rough and dangerous out there I guess." Despite saying this, he doesn't seem to be in a bad mood.
He is then asked how HE is doing. He looks towards the playing children. "...I had an encounter with the Guard." He says more seriously. "They were trying to take down Ida. I had to fight him off. Well, maybe I didn't have to. I mean, it was the only solution I could think of." He lowers his head. "...That man lost everything. Not unlike me. But unlike me, he found religion. I hated him so much." He shakes his head. "But now I'm just...sad that we'll probably be fighting again and again and again. Lily and Ida were pretty uh..." He hesitates. "...It's not easy for me to be optimistic, honestly. I wish it was, but I think I'm just a cynic by nature." He laughs faintly. "...But, I mean, moments like this. Seeing this. It reminds me that it's not all that bad. There's still a future. There's still the capacity to rebuild. It isn't all horrible. And I mean, it probably isn't as bad as I think sometimes. I guess it's the small town boy in me."
<Pose Tracker> Riesenlied has posed.
"I think Janey's already whacking up some of the things she finds a bit dangerous... she's a carpenter at heart, I think," Riesenlied lets out a very little chuckle. "They're from Filgaia. They aren't ingenues... they've been through rough patches -- and grown stronger for it, and I'm not about to disregard that side of them."
A pause, "Even if they're my beloved kids, and I'd do anything to protect them."
She looks towards Fei and... quietly nods gently. "... she'd turned into a Hellion... it isn't surprising that the Guard will take action." She places her hand to her heart. "I'm... going to do my best for her too. I'm not going to fail her or Garrett again..."
<Pose Tracker> Fei Fong Wong has posed.
"Huh! Is she now? She did was a big help with the sign..." Fei considers. "Then I'll keep 'em to it. You learn more if you teach yourself." He reaches into his pocket and draws something out of it. Riesenlied can see the chain, but not what it's attached to. Fei looks at the item for a while rather than directly at Riesenlied.
"You're a good mom, Riese. I gotta admit, I was worried at first. Our lives are tough and full of trouble, not the sort of life kids should face. Or so I thought." He turns the item over in his hand. "But it's hard to argue 'gainst those smiles. And you're a good mom. Whatever happens won't change that."
He lowers his hand and adds, "Hearin' you say that gives me some confidence, Riese." He manages a smile. "...But uh, I'm guessing our bounties are about to go up. He said to expect Althena's wrath and such. It might be better if I don't stick around too long?" He frowns for a moment. "I don't think I could, uh, bear it if I destroy another place like home."
<Pose Tracker> Riesenlied has posed.
Riesenlied glances towards the item Fei picks out of his pocket, tilting her head curiously; she can't see, though, and she doesn't pry. "They're keen and precocious learners. Both Janey and Mikaia. They're eager to use the teachings around them to better themselves..."
She-- quietly smiles bashfully at Fei's compliment. "Thank you... stewardship over these children is not something I would take lightly." She lowers her head. "... I think Althena's Guard is rather displeased with the lot of us. I, myself, have quite the bounty with them..."
A soft sigh. "Fei, can I admit something a bit odd?"
<Pose Tracker> Fei Fong Wong has posed.
"What, still?" Fei says. He glances back to Mikaia and Janey for a moment. He supposes that when you have the kind of lives they do, you have a lot of motivation to do just that, but Filgaia while definitely harsh often rewards hard work. Not that this is Filgaia anymore.
Fei blinks at the odd question about oddness. He pockets what he was holding onto. It's a casual movement and he doesn't answer unasked questions. It definitely seemed something intensely personal even if Fei keeps his personal life surprisingly under wraps aside from the Lahan thing.
"I don't mind." Fei crouches down so Riese doesn't have to keep looking up from the seesaw. "What's up?"
<Pose Tracker> Riesenlied has posed.
Riesenlied scratches her cheek to say, a little bit lower in voice, "They keep sneaking out to do Digs. I heard they snuck in with Miss Lemina to the Trial Cave down below..." she chuckles. "I have no doubt they'll become Drifters when they become of age."
A pause, as she places her hand to her cheek as she expresses, "I... had another episode. And I... I feel I saw a memory I..."
She frowns. "A memory I'd... repressed before? It's... unsettling. It feels new, and yet at the same time, old. It's deeply unsettling."
She shakes her head and presses through. "But I saw it... I think I saw a-- Medium. And Miss Avril thinks it may be one of the Original Mediums, like what she has..."
A hesitant pause. "If I were able to return to Elru and find it, maybe I can learn how to use... the Guardian's powers in earnest. And maybe even... learn to start purifying Malevolence, from Miss Cecilia."
<Pose Tracker> Fei Fong Wong has posed.
"Is that what Avril has?" Fei asks. "I'm not sure what the difference between an 'Original Medium' and a uh, a Medium is." This is a bit beyond his knowledge level. He rubs the back of his neck with a spare hand, looking wistful. "...Lost memories, huh..." Fei grins widely. "Hate to say it, but I sympathize! I know how rough that is, but--" He lowers his hand. "It sounds like you already made your decision whether or not to look for it, but I know memories that are buried...are usually buried for a good reason." He shakes his head. "It might not be anythin' good you find there. But if it's important to you, then I'll be happy to lend you whatever help I can when the time comes. I've been...meaning to head to Elru myself, actually. Eventually. I mean," He laughs a bit. "I'm not in any rush or anything." He shakes his head. "But there's some things I want to look into myself over there nad..." He frowns. "...I'm guessing Xantia's likely to too." He smiles. "Surprised you didn't already know how to purify it."
He shakes his head. "Doesn't make sense to just have one Shepherd. Too much malevolence to purify."
Then he smiles. "Already having adventures huh? I remember when I first went up to Doc's and ran into my first hungry wolf. By the time they're my age they'll be more experienced than me, I bet!"
<Pose Tracker> Riesenlied has posed.
There's a very tired little smile from Riesenlied, nodding as Fei advises that they're usually buried for a good reason. "I know. It will be an extremely painful memory of the past for me to face... but..."
A pause, as she clutches at her heart. "It's an important one that I do so. For my own well being... and if this does turn out how it is, perhaps for others and the world as well."
She listens to Fei talk about how he's heading to Elru too, and Xantia... what waits for them there? She doesn't know... "Thank you. I'll call upon your aid when the time comes... I can only hope something positive comes of it."
She doesn't quite answer when she looks to Janey and Mikaia, thinking of their first adventures. But the look on her face is clear: she's proud of them.
<Pose Tracker> Fei Fong Wong has posed.
"Everybody says that." Fei says. "Xantia too. And I guess I warn her when she's looking and I encourage her when she's not. I guess I'm a bit of a hypocrite." Fei shakes his had. "But still. I hope you find it. I hope it gives you what you seek and--I hope after you face it, you can keep being whom you are, Riese. Because what you are right now is someone pretty special." He looks back to the tarzan ropes. "And I'm glad my first memory of you wasn't Adelhyde either. When I think back to our first meeting it will be a happy one."
He looks at his hand for a moment. It's the same motion as when he was looking at that mysterious object of his. It's better for the world if he finds it, even if it's painful, he thinks.
"Maybe that's my problem. I've been worrying about my own happy ending...when I should be thinking about their happy future." He nods towards Mikaia and Janey. "Motherhood, huh..."
He closes his eyes. He doesn't see a memory, of course, and he certainly was never a mother. But that smile Riese gave to Janey and Mikaia.
There's something familiar about that smile. A woman extending a hand to him in the desert. Riese really is so much like her. To think there could be too such people in one world, but that is a smile he's seen many times before. It's more familiar than a singular memory can make it. And, of course, it's a memory not always directed at him either.
"Hey Riese." He says. "...Do you think one day... I could be a good parent like you and Noeline?" He pauses before laughing. "Not that I'm planning anything like that. Honestly I'm not sure I'd be that good at it. It's more that...it'd be nice to think that I could be good at it if I chose to, more than actually entering that kind of commitment." He shakes his head. "I'd hope I could be the kind of parent you and Noe are."
<Pose Tracker> Riesenlied has posed.
Riesenlied-- opens her mouth slowly, bashful as she quietly nods with a tilt of her head. "I'm very grateful that you think that way... I can only hope I won't ever let you down." She rocks a little on her see-saw set, as Mikaia plays with some of the children that she's gone to become friends with. It's sweet to see.
...do you think one day... I could be a good parent like you and Noeline?
Riesenlied thinks about it for a while. Then she nods, saying, "Parenting is... like a journey, so far. I don't think Noeline ever thought she could be a good parent-- I-- perhaps somewhat roped her into it," she bashfully chuckles.
"I... think of it every single day. What I'm giving to them, and what they're giving to me in turn -- they're teaching me so much, too, you know," Riesenlied expresses. "And I think it's that relationship between a parent and child that's key. As long as that dialogue is flowing... understanding is going to come through, even if there's hiccups in the way."
She places a hand to her lap. "And I've seen you encourage others in a way that I think -- I think would make for wonderful children as they grow up. You're loyal and kind to those you care about."
<Pose Tracker> Fei Fong Wong has posed.
"I'm pretty sure if I ever think that, it'll be me who's screwing up." Fei laughs a little. "Every time I disagreed with you, it turned out that I should've had your faith." He looks towards Riesenlied. He can't help but be curious. His focus even intensifies as he straightens his shoulders as he focuses on his friend.
"What'd they teach you?" He asks.
He looks down as he mulls over the word. Flowing dialogue then understanding will follow. "So...don't give up when there's hiccups." He murmurs. He looks back to Riesenlied. "You think so?" He smiles at her. "I guess... my fear is that we'll get along great, but then one day...we'll be different people, and..."
He shakes his head. "But it's a relief to hear that from you, Riesenlied."
He stands back up, walks over to his packs and starts dragging them over. It seems like he's decided to stick around a while as he sits his stuff back down and lies down against it, staring upward at the clouds. It feels like it's been ages since he's honestly just enjoyed sky watching.
"Thanks, Riese. That heart of yours may save all of us one day."
And then he starts humming a melody that Riesenlied doesn't know. A melody that haunts Fei even over to Lunar, but one he'd never do without. It's the kind of simple melody that one might expect to hear in a children's toy, or a lullaby.