2018-08-11: Ammy and the Chocolate Factory

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===============================<* East Nota *>================================

Once two towns on opposite banks of a large river, East and West Nota are now a single city bound by a large bridge spanning both banks. Both halves of the city are laid out on sprawling terraces carved out of a large hill (some suggest by the Goddess herself). Stone stairs link the terraces to each other; the average Notan spends a good deal of her day climbing.

East Nota marks the border separating the heart of the Meribus continent from the more lawless lands to the east. It serves as a large commercial hub where residents of the eastlands can still experience a taste of what some would call civilization.

Althena's Guard maintains a significant detachment here, ostensibly to discourage banditry, but local rumours suggest the Goddess is preparing to extend her reach and call her recalcitrant children home.

BGM: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=54PlUl6avjw


<Pose Tracker> Seraph Amaranth has posed.

        Nota was rocked by a rather sordid battle with a Hellion upon its bridge, not very long ago. With so much of the townsfolk still ailing from the close tragedy that had happened to their town, some look towards entertainment and wonderment in order to soothe themselves...

        ... and sometimes, wonderment happens when you least expect it.

        A moonlit night on East Nota cascades the setting -- a normally tiny chocolaterie run by one Mademoiselle Genevieve, renowned for delicious truffle and ganache, yet tonight...

        Tonight and tonight alone, for your eyes and ears only...

        An opulent, palace-like structure looms over the centre storefront. Shining lights and cascading beams of sunlight cut through the night, inviting those with even the inkling of Resonance to see it inwards. Perhaps you have been invited by means of a calling card, or you were curious about what this mysterious palace holds.

        Beware, for this is a Dig like no other. Within this chocolaterie palace, the most dreadful of evils await. The most dreadful evils of...

======================<* La Chocolaterie de Genevieve *>=======================
=====================<* CHALLENGE - The Hors d'Ouevres *>======================
| Type: Entree            |  Dungeon Ability: Taste  |Challenge Rating: Hungee |
==========================< Challenge Information: >=========================== 

A pre-show meal?!

A wide table of hors d'ouevres garnished in a chocolaterie theme expands before you. No expense has been spared here --
there exists everything from chocolate-bread canapes with a pat of maple butter, vol-au-vent with a spicy mole chicken
and mushroom filling, amuse-bouche parmentier in waffle shapes with drizzling of chocolate glaze...

And of course, an aperitif -- various ranges of wine sourced from Nota itself, ranging from Notan plum wine to Azado
oloroso sherry, and for the exquisitely discerning, a Manzanilla Meribia.

Just... what is the Phantom Thief awaiting here?
=Dungeon Conditions: What Do Half Those Words Even Mean========================
GS: Seraph Amaranth has adjusted their boss level for 6 opponents!
<Pose Tracker> Shalune Amira has posed.

        For Shalune's rather scatterbrained mind, the idea of visiting a chocolate factory in order to find out more about the Phantom Thief makes perfect sense. After all, one of her strongest impressions of their trip through the Claire de Lune was the Material Summoning of Dinoginos slowly chewing its way contentedly through a mountain of mudcake in a small lake of chocolate sauce.

        It's one of those images that sticks with you, y'know?

        It's also one of those images that takes some serious explaining. By now, Shalune could probably be described as dimly resonant. Though the term itself still isn't one she can pin down to a specific feeling or sensation, she's at least able to perceive the Phantom Thief's illusions so long as she isn't actively thinking about them being illusions, stuck in that transition phase between mundane and magical.

        She's okay with that, if only because it gives her some level of insight into the Phantom Thief. While a more resonant person might pass off the entire episode as a grand-scale fabrication, she at least can tell that the chocolate lake they dredged their way through wasn't completely made up - that some of it was very definitely real.

        (It took ages to clean off her clothes afterwards, and the smell might never come out.)

        She's a merchant, and even if she's not a very good one it's enough to realize that demand requires supply - and there aren't a whole lot of places on Lunar for someone to pick up chocolate in that kind of quantity. Chasing up that lead was Shalune's next step--

        --and it turns out to be fruitful in a way she never expected, as the pink-haired girl stares with bemusement at the chunk of high street lit up with shimmering lights and a nighttime spectacle. "W-wah--..." she breathes, as taken in as she ever is by the Phantom Thief's theatrics; she bobs from foot to foot for a moment, then attempts to harden up her expression into a thin line. "Okay! We've gotta catch her this time!" the mechanic huffs to herself, pumping her fists as she strides forwards with a sudden determination.

        A determination which is immediately derailed as she pushes the door open to come face with the platters before them. ... on any other night, she might wonder at the way the Thief seems to mix gratitude and thievery together into one big show. Tonight, though, her cheeks are quickly puffed out like a hamster's as she makes a low 'mm--!!' of delight, moving from one plate to another in a way that can only be described as

GS: Shalune Amira has attacked Shalune Amira with Back to Back!
GS: Shalune Amira has entered a Reflect stance!
GS: Shalune Amira has completed her action.
GS: Shalune Amira takes a solid hit from Shalune Amira's Back to Back for 0 hit points!
GS: Shield! Statuses applied to Shalune Amira!
<Pose Tracker> Malfi has posed.

Malfi isn't Resonant --no, not even a little bit. She completely misses the illusion; the chocolate shop looks like an ordinary, darkened chocolate shop. She does, of course, see the others inside and evidently pillaging it, and that's enough to catch her attention, particularly since she has a weakness for sweets (and coffee!). She approaches the shop cautiously, using a watch-and-wait approach until she can definatively figure out what's going on inside. Naturally, she doesn't perceive the illusionary confections, but all of Madmoiselle Genevieve's normal wares are still inside. Humming, she helps herself to a couple of chocolate tortes...but, since stealing would be dishonorable, she leaves what she believes will be sufficient coin to cover. This will be her procedure throughout the evening. Mother's eyes, those tortes look good! And, hey, are those truffles?!?!

GS: Malfi has spent 1 Combo on Gatling!
GS: You can only attack people in the same room as you.
GS: Malfi has spent 1 Combo on Gatling!
GS: Malfi has attacked Seraph Amaranth with Improv Tango!
GS: Malfi has completed her action.
GS: Seraph Amaranth takes a glancing hit from Malfi's Improv Tango for 45 hit points!
<Pose Tracker> Mercedes Hartley has posed.

Mercedes Hartley likes chocolate.

Honestly, she just has a general sweet tooth, but she especially likes chocolate, and this isn't helped by the fact that she has had it perhaps five times in her life; it is generally outside the budget of a lower-class Kislevi family, being much more a rich person's treat. She certainly hasn't ever been able to afford anything but the smell of anywhere willing to call itself a chocolaterie.

And then she got a card. A card telling her that she was requested to show up at a chocolate place because... why? She didn't know. She almost didn't want to ask in case it was a mistake that she got it. Mercedes doesn't know much about the Phantom Thief (by which we mean 'anything at all'), so it was kind of out of the blue for her.

But that's why she's here now. Mercedes is, most of all, curious. And she is pretty sure that there was not a palatial entrance here last time she went down this street, which is why she just shoved the door open and stepped in to try to figure out what was going on, only to be presented with foods that she has no name for, but certainly smell good.

"Oh, aaw..." Mercedes really wants to try some of the things she can barely describe... but no! She must be good, and not eat the food that is not hers but smells delicious and is just sitting there with nobody to watch it and -

Wait, is that some other girl?

"Hey!" Mercedes calls to Shalune. "What are you doing here? Did you get a card too? Does that mean you're just allowed to have some?" Well, she's trying to behave. She has to be a good girl! Those canapes look really good, though... Mercedes looks a little wistful.

<Pose Tracker> Jacqueline Barber has posed.

It was Shalune that made the connections first, and for that, Jacqueline was immensely proud of her. She had been thinking of it all as illusionary, but it took Shalune's brand of thinking to realize the truth of it. That there was a physical layer to the Phantom Thief's illusions, and one that needed restocking...

When she thought about it now it made sense, but Shalune had to explain it to her first. But now that she was firmly on board, Jacqueline had come with her here, to this shimmering, brightly lit palace of delicious delights.

"She always knows how to put on a good show..." Jacqueline muses, then looks toward Shalune with a smile. "Yes, I agree."

...Jacqueline seemed way too excited about this. Maybe she was just happy about getting the chance to match wits with the Phantom Thief again.

...However, it would appear that the Phantom Thief knew well Jacqueline's greatest weakness. Pastries...

Jacqueline goes for one immediately, though pauses to glance toward Mercedes and offer a smile.

"Ah, Miss Hartley, good to see you again!" She greets with a wave before finishing off the pastry.

Spoils of war, certainly.

GS: Jacqueline Barber has attacked Seraph Amaranth with Pastry Pilfering!
GS: Jacqueline Barber has completed her action.
GS: Seraph Amaranth takes a glancing hit from Jacqueline Barber's Pastry Pilfering for 52 hit points!
<Pose Tracker> Shalune Amira has posed.

        Shalune perks up at being addressed; thin dark lines appear on her forehead for a moment as she's caught, and her initial attempt to excuse herself is kind of belied by the way she has to swallow first - and even that needs to take a while. "N-no! I'm after the Phantom Thief! This is evidence!" she blurts afterwards, as she pumps her fists. "But if she gave you a card, that means it's a heist! She's got to be here, and the Carakin are going to meet her challenge and catch her!"

        ... it's a bold proclamation that absolutely in no way explains why she's eating...

<Pose Tracker> Margaret has posed.

 
There are a good half-dozen people lurking around East Nota's rooftops observing the situation. They will perhaps do something if the situation develops to the disadvantage of

MARGARET
(the Black Pearl of Neo Vane)

because

"I'm going in alone," Margaret says.

"k" "sure" "Of course ma'am" "we'll keep things in line" "have fun" "bring us something"

Swish! Margaret leaps down from the roof.

Margaret has her spear with her which is also on fire. The lancehead of Lamplighter still does that, and she hasn't put the fire out. She rests it on her shoulder - which is bare, because she's wearing a gauzy cocktail style gown in glittery purple fabric. It is probably borderline heresy, but she can get away with it. There is a single jeweled bird-skull brooch, holding all the fabric together.

In she marches.

Other people are speaking even as Margaret adjusts the strap on her EVIDENCE PURSE, which is a normal purse but very large, for a purse. It sits on her hip but the strap's over her shoulder. If this should make her boobs stand out more, well, that's not a negative to her. Her eyes take in the spread. Gradually. Slowly.

She reaches the wine. "Well," she says as she picks up the thin bottle of plum wine, "THIS," into the purse it goes, "is certainly," the sherry gets poured into a huge snifter glass, "something suspicious, and I, for one, intend," then she flips Lamplighter around to quench the flame in the liquor, which produces a fragrant wiff, "to dispose of what does not need entrance into the court record."

Glug.

Margaret grabs some canapes to take with her, glancing at Shalune and Mercedes as she does.

GS: Margaret has attacked Seraph Amaranth with Bivalve!
GS: Margaret has completed her action.
<Pose Tracker> Mercedes Hartley has posed.

"Hi!" Mercedes says, brightly, when Jacqueline addresses her.

Her stomach rumbles because literally everyone is eating around her. jerks.

<Pose Tracker> Margaret has posed.

 
Margaret waggles her fingers while her mouth is full. She is not too far off from Shalune though she's taking some efforts not to screw up her carmine lip rouge.

<Pose Tracker> Jacqueline Barber has posed.

Jacqueline, who is totally a good rolemodel, what're you talking about, offers Mercedes a pastry.

"They're really good...you should try one! I think she wants us to...and I plan to accept her challenge." She says.

<Pose Tracker> Loren Voss has posed.

        To be honest, Loren hadn't left Nota to begin with. Low on funds, with communications a bit scattershot at the moment (ostensibly to avoid prying ears, such as they might be on Lunar), the medical officer has largely been left to fend for himself, balancing things between attempting to gather information and (yes) attempting to earn some money and quickly at that. Hair dye doesn't come cheap.
        (considering how many of the guard are here, not a good state of affairs)

        It's a dark night tonight. Lingering near the bridge -- still damaged from that fight with a Hellion -- Loren considers his options and, more importantly, the contents of his wallet. Maybe it would be better to move on before his luck (such that it is) runs out--

        It's the lights in the sky that catch his attention. It's as if the sun has somehow managed to violate the order of things and cast down a few choice rays of light.
        Which given the palace that's appeared impossibly once he investigates further down the street, suggests other hands at play. This... it looks too much like Claire de Lune--

        He pushes in through the front door, and has a moment of something akin to...
        "...What in the world?"
        Well, it could be tagged as surprise or as shock. Or possibly, a young man engaged in a bit of an internal struggle when faced with an assortment of food.
        ...It smells good...

        The spirit is willing but the flesh is weak. Loren helps himself, and in the process demonstrates just how much a healthy young man can put away when they put their mind to it.

        He's stuff another canape into his mouth when he out and out freezes again, nearly choking on it.
        He has after all just noticed MARGARET.

GS: Loren Voss has attacked Loren Voss with Barrier Factor!
GS: Loren Voss has completed his action.
GS: Loren Voss takes a solid hit from Loren Voss's Barrier Factor for 0 hit points!
GS: Shield! Statuses applied to Loren Voss!
<Pose Tracker> Margaret has posed.

 
Margaret has also noticed Loren.

She narrows her eyes so hard that something other than her eyeliner goes 'crack!' like distant thunder.

<Pose Tracker> Malfi has posed.

Malfi notices Jay, of course. That's one of the humans she wants to keep for a specimen after the rest have all been slaughtered. She doesn't dare acknowledge her, though, since Malfi is currently disguised as a human -- in a disguise she hasn't used before. Belatedly, she adjusts her eyes to darkvision -- one of the advantages of being a shapeshifter. This might make her pupils appear cat-like to anyone who cares to notice. Now that she can see, she moves to examine the product signs in the shop -- some of which are in a language she doesn't read. Her translator isn't any help. Ganache? Pots du creme? No matter what they're called, they look absolutely delicious. Good thing she's wearing her backpack!

[SYSTEM] Seraph Amaranth changed to her 'Phantom Thief Amaranth' Description!

<Pose Tracker> Loren Voss has posed.

        Loren begins to 'surreptitiously' start to move towards the nearest exit.
        ...Grabbing another piece of chocolate bread as he goes.

<Pose Tracker> Seraph Amaranth has posed.

        The dining hall dims.

        There's a wonderful, rich and bewitching chuckle-- and spotlights erupt from each corner of the room as a swirl of lights and colour emerge atop one balcony. For Malfi, she's decided to perch atop a tree overlooking the back of the shop, though for some mysterious reason...

        Even to her Metal Demon senses... the rest of the show appears quite real. A sleight of hand, as a master of illusion -- Amaranth can adjust illusory constructs even to the unresonant, so that they too can enjoy!

        "Hm hm... my, I have such lovely guests tonight!" expresses the Phantom Thief, breathlessly. She's stunning in a three-piece laced suit finished with her satin top hat, billowing with a red-trimmed cape that necks high and seems to take a life of its own behind her.

        She adjusts her monocle and bows, expressing, "Miss Jacqueline, Miss Shalune... and if it is not the Black Pearl of Neo-Vane! My, such esteemed guests I have..."

        A pause, as she looks to Mercedes, Malfi and Loren. "I do not have the pleasure of meeting the rest of you beforehand, but-- charmed, all the same." Her voice is husky and luxurious, lilting out every syllable as if reading poetry.

        She smirks as she expresses, "I hope you've enjoyed the refreshments... before the main event of the show tonight!"

        She taps at her cane and twirls about. "I have charmed the most prestigious owner of this establishment, one Mademoiselle Genevieve! Come, rescue her from my clutches if you dare, adventurers!"

        If it were any other villain, this would be the start of a battle, no doubt. Swords, sorcery, even ARMs would be on the line. Instead--

======================<* La Chocolaterie de Genevieve *>=======================
============<* CHALLENGE - Minecarts You've Seen, But Bathtubs?? *>============
| Type: Drinks            |  Dungeon Ability: Sippy  | Challenge Rating: Silky |
==========================< Challenge Information: >===========================

--a bathtub slides from stage right?!

An ivory bathtub with a ship hull-like shape, with four gilded feet that Amaranth just luxuriously reclines into,
kicking her legs up. She laughs richly as she expresses, "Follow me as we ride upon the River of Chocolate, my
lovelies~!"

What that means may not be so clear, but--

There's a roar, as the scene switches to that of an opulent countryside upon which a riverbank...

...overflows! But it does not flow with water -- rather, it flows with piping hot cocoa, the like that has been melted
with real chocolate in a banne-marie!

Several giant teacups with massive teaspoon oars have been provided that you can climb into and row... or perhaps you
have other ideas for makeshift boats?
=Dungeon Conditions: Stir Well, Then Serve=====================================
GS: Seraph Amaranth takes a solid hit from Margaret's Bivalve for 102 hit points!
GS: Seraph Amaranth has attacked Margaret with Wider Than a Mile!
GS: Seraph Amaranth has attacked Mercedes Hartley with I'm Crossing You In Style - Someday!!
GS: Seraph Amaranth has attacked Malfi with Oh Dream Maker...!
GS: Seraph Amaranth has attacked Shalune Amira with My Heartbreaker!
GS: Seraph Amaranth has attacked Loren Voss with Wherever You're Going...!
GS: Seraph Amaranth has attacked Jacqueline Barber with ...I'm Going That Way!!
GS: Seraph Amaranth has completed her action.
GS: Mercedes Hartley takes a solid hit from Seraph Amaranth's I'm Crossing You In Style - Someday! for 116 hit points!
GS: Jacqueline Barber takes a solid hit from Seraph Amaranth's ...I'm Going That Way! for 111 hit points!
GS: Malfi guards a hit from Seraph Amaranth's Oh Dream Maker... for 73 hit points!
GS: Shalune Amira guards a hit from Seraph Amaranth's My Heartbreaker for 87 hit points!
GS: Loren Voss takes a solid hit from Seraph Amaranth's Wherever You're Going... for 110 hit points!
GS: Margaret guards a hit from Seraph Amaranth's Wider Than a Mile for 66 hit points!
<Pose Tracker> Malfi has posed.

Malfi pauses, dazed, as the scenery shifts. It shouldn't be able to do that! Her instincts urge caution, and she takes out her scanner, which shows...something. Perhaps these constructs aren't real but quasi-real. Which, in her opinion, means real enough. She carefully picks her way over to the chocolate riverbank, getting close enough to take a sample, then drink it. It feels real, smells real... She maneuvers into a teacup and prepares to start rowing, keeping a wary eye on Seraph Amaranth the whole time. She hasn't heard of the Phantom Thief, and this human(?) certainly has unusual powers. For once, though, the human's not trying to kill her! Not outright, anyway! Might as well play along!

GS: Malfi has attacked Seraph Amaranth with Rakurai!
GS: Malfi has completed her action.
GS: CRITICAL! Seraph Amaranth takes a solid hit from Malfi's Rakurai for 113 hit points!
GS: Cripple and Disrupt! Statuses applied to Seraph Amaranth!
GS: Shield! Statuses applied to Malfi!
<Pose Tracker> Mercedes Hartley has posed.

"Well... okay, but who is it? I didn't know the name and I don't even really know what's going on," Mercedes says, as she helps herself to...

Uh, 'a selection'. Apparently giving her permission means giving her permission to load a plate. If she can find a plate.

"I just thought I'd come and see what was going on because it seemed like it would be interesting." Mercedes glosses over the sweet tooth part as she takes a big bite out of what she vaguely recognizes as chicken and mushroom even if she has no idea what the sauce is called.

This means that when the Phantom Thief arrives to give a speech, Mercedes has her mouth full. She immediately feels like a bit of an idiot.

She swallows, hastily. "Hey, you can't just capture people so they need to be rescued!" Mercedes points at the Phantom Thief, accidentally-dramatically. "I'll get her back from you, just watch! And if you don't mind, I'm going to have this to go!"

Mercedes looks back at Jacqueline and Shalune for a moment before rushing toward a teacup. This was not how Mercedes expected to end her day, but she just leaps in, grabbing at one of the big spoons and trying to juggle it and her plate of hors d'ouevres while she gets going. It is an accident waiting to happen.

It happens. "Aah, that's hot!"

GS: Mercedes Hartley has attacked Seraph Amaranth with Tempest in a Tea...cup!
GS: Mercedes Hartley has completed her action.
GS: Seraph Amaranth takes a glancing hit from Mercedes Hartley's Tempest in a Tea...cup for 49 hit points!
<Pose Tracker> Shalune Amira has posed.

        Shalune perks up again, but for entirely different reasons this time - she actually manages to pick up on the shift in the air shortly before it happens, somehow managing to pick up on a spark of Resonance out of the blue. While it's not exactly helpful, it's enough to give her the first word afterwards, as she steps forwards and thrusts her finger out at the Phantom Thief. "It's you!" she blurts, if only because it feels appropriate to right at this moment.

        She follows up immediately, even if she doesn't exactly know what to make of the Seraph's dangerous weapon, having never seen a bathtub be used offensively. "I don't know what you're planning, but you won't get away with it! We'll stop you this time! You won't steal any more chocolate for your personal lake!" This declaration would work a lot better were the corner of her mouth not smudged, she realizes, and dabs at it with an elegant embroidered napkin, trying not to feel too sheepish about things.

        At least she's facing the Phantom Thief directly, taking in every detail she can; she'd pull out a notebook and draw a quick sketch, except it feels like cheating, and either way the Phantom Thief is already gliding down the river - indoors, she has to remind herself, except it doesn't dispel the illusion at all. "F-fine!" she blurts after a moment, feeling the need to keep up the theatrics as she steps into one of the tubs and grasps the oars with determination. "We'll play your game! We won't let you steal away and charm the owner!"

        Quietly, she hopes to herself that the Phantom Thief means charmed magically. It might be rather awkward, otherwise. Shaking it away, she huffs out a breath. "U-um, Lady Margaret! Big Shal's outside, so she should be able to keep everyone else away from the building safely!" Big Shal: possibly more resonant than Shalune.

GS: Shalune Amira has attacked Seraph Amaranth with Big Shal - It's Showtime!!
GS: Shalune Amira has completed her action.
GS: Seraph Amaranth takes a solid hit from Shalune Amira's Big Shal - It's Showtime! for 152 hit points!
<Pose Tracker> Jacqueline Barber has posed.

Jacqueline notices Malfi, but she doesn't notice Malfi. That would imply that Jacqueline could see through her disguise. Jacqueline has a keen eye, but not that keen!

Jacqueline has not exactly had her fill of pastries. That implies there's an end to it. She does, however, pause and turn her attention to the front as the dining hall dims. She stands up and looks toward the balcony, where a fantastic display of lights and color erupts.

"I'm glad to see you again in good health, Phantom Thief Amaranth." Jacqueline greets...and then, the Phantom Thief issues her challenge. Jacqueline nods.

"Very well! We accept your challenge. We'll rescue her, and then..." Jacqueline gestures dramatically. "Bring you to justice!"

She's really getting into it. Maybe it's all the pastries. She's a little taken aback, though, by the appearance of...a bathtub!?

Jacqueline blinks, and then watches as the scenery shifts to a countryside scene complete with a river...

Of chocolate.

Jacqueline immediately hops into one of the teacups. Rather than take up one of the oars, she gestures with her left hand and projects a gust of wind Sorcery that starts the cup moving.

Meanwhile, she rummages through her bags, and tosses some bottles out to those present.

...They look like normal potions, but they're a bit sweeter than her usual fare. Is that...a hint of blueberry?

GS: Jacqueline Barber has attacked Shalune Amira with Distribution Theory!
GS: Jacqueline Barber has attacked Margaret with Distribution Theory!
GS: Jacqueline Barber has attacked Mercedes Hartley with Distribution Theory!
GS: Jacqueline Barber has attacked Malfi with Distribution Theory!
GS: Jacqueline Barber has attacked Loren Voss with Distribution Theory!
GS: Jacqueline Barber has completed her action.
<Pose Tracker> Margaret has posed.

 
"Oh no you don't you miserable little twerp," Margaret says, tilting her glass towards Loren. "You're in for the duration now. You can walk out here as my deputy and get a little off your sentence or you can get captured in a net and sold at the monster auction." She's probably bluffing.

Probably.

HOWever, then there is a figure who appears before them. Margaret's head turns towards the caparisioned figure and thinks to herself with disgust: She's cute! Why does she have to be adorable?! What cuteness plague has brought us to this place? She swills down more of the burned port as she says, with a curl of her lip, "I'll rescue her, alright. I'll rescue YOU!" A pause, as she proceeds forwards - involuntarily - saying even as the tub appears, "No, that's not right."

"Good thinking," she calls to Shalune. "My Hounds of Hell aren't exactly policemen and if there were some kind of rush they WOULD have to resort to the monster nets, and that just makes everyone unhappy."

What?

She walks down the river bank on her three inch heels (of course she has heels) over towards Loren. "As for YOU, mister," she says, her voice edging into the shout tone zone, "You are going to row and you're going to do a bang up job of it whether you like it or not. THUNDER ROAD."

Lightning crashes... and does not harm Loren. In fact it feels pretty frigging good. He can probably make the educated hypothesis that this strange enchantment of Margaret's is producing an effect comparable if not identical to amphetamine stimulants. That doesn't explain the weird sensation that he's hearing a back-beat.

GS: Jacqueline Barber heals Margaret! She gains 100 temporary hit points!
GS: Margaret has attacked Margaret with Thunder Road!
GS: Margaret has attacked Loren Voss with Thunder Road!
GS: Margaret has completed her action.
<Pose Tracker> Margaret has posed.

 
The potion bottle lands in Margaret's snifter. She fishes it out, bites it open, and drinks it with a snap of the neck.

Yeah, she wasn't thrilled about the liquor ban either.

GS: Malfi gains Restore, shortening negative statuses by 3 turns each!
GS: Jacqueline Barber heals Malfi! She gains 100 temporary hit points!
GS: Shalune Amira gains Restore, shortening negative statuses by 3 turns each!
GS: Jacqueline Barber heals Shalune Amira! She gains 100 temporary hit points!
<Pose Tracker> Malfi has posed.

"Thanks!" Malfi calls to Jay before imbibing the potion. Those were yet another strange power some humans had. Sometimes it seems there was no end to the powers humans could manifest when pushed to the wall...

GS: Jacqueline Barber heals Mercedes Hartley! She gains 100 temporary hit points!
GS: Loren Voss gains Restore, shortening negative statuses by 3 turns each!
GS: Jacqueline Barber heals Loren Voss! He gains 100 temporary hit points!
GS: Loren Voss takes a solid hit from Margaret's Thunder Road for 0 hit points!
GS: Quick! Statuses applied to Loren Voss!
<Pose Tracker> Loren Voss has posed.

        "Deputy? Excuse me? I don't think that's--"
        He pauses, as if considering her threat.
        "And that's definitely not legal. Save it. I'm leaving." He turns to go, apparently intent on polishing off the last of his ill-gotten gains before he heads out.

        The lights dim.
                "Mmf," Loren approximates, before actually swallowing what he has in his mouth.
        Amaranth might say she's 'charmed'. Loren's response however might be less-than-charming: "I don't know what's going on here, but it's not my problem. I'm sure the rest of them have it covered. I'm leaving." Admittedly, he was already doing the latter, but--

        A bathtub slides into the room.
        At first, this just means that Loren hesitates as if to attempt to judge whether this is really happening, then continues on his quest for the door.
        This quickly becomes impossible: chocolate starts to pour into the room. Loren draws the only conclusion he can:

        "You put something in the food, didn't you--"

        The accusation ends on a sound that's approximately akin to 'goh' as he gets essentially tackled by an incoming teacup the size of a horse and takes a brief dip in the lapping edge of the chocolate river.
        He rises to his feet in a hurry, grabbing onto the lip of the teacup that impacted him. It tilts chaotically on the chocolate waters.

        "Ugh... this can't possibly be..."

        And then he's struck by lightning. It's, shockingly, a largely positive experience, all considering. He lifts his head as if to size up Margaret and her current demeanor, then gazes off into an eternity of fields and... the river. There is no door. There is no e s c a p e.

        "...fine," he settles for, climbing aboard what appears to be an oversized teacup.

        Then almost absently reaches out a hand and catches a bottle right out of the air. He squints at it, then downs it in one shot, because, what the hell, he's already largely certain this is some sort of drugging.

        But he does say, before he starts rowing (with a spoon, there is no god): "This is ridiculous."

GS: Loren Voss has attacked Seraph Amaranth with Conscripted Rowing!
GS: Loren Voss has completed his action.
GS: Seraph Amaranth takes a glancing hit from Loren Voss's Conscripted Rowing for 52 hit points!
[ALTS] Loren Voss is not on any alts lists.
<Pose Tracker> Seraph Amaranth has posed.

        Amaranth rather luxuriously reclines upon the bathtub and peers at Malfi. Something was peculiar about this lady, something about her aura, but she can't quite pick out why. She's never met Metal Demons before, after all. "Would you grant me the honour of giving your name, young miss?" she teases as she leans over the bathtub rim.

        It's like she just wants a chat with people, really. But having so many people after her, here -- even the ones she thought couldn't see her -- she couldn't be more than happy.

        "Y--you're going to rescue me?" Amaranth can't help but play it straight up as she looks to Margaret, cheeks blushing as she holds her hand to her heart. "Oh my!" A pause, as she pouts to go, "Hey! Don't take that back, you were onto something there!"

        "Oh?~" she asks of Mercedes. "Well, your company tonight is utterly delightful, I shall say..." she smiles rather winningly as she expresses, "And why not? Mademoiselle Genevieve is having the time of her life, I shall have you know!" she sounds extra-proud of that.

        Jacqueline makes her dramatic declaration, and some part of Ammy -- the part that's like 90 percent Katherine -- wants to roll on the floor and squee. What a COOL declaration!!

        "Hm hm... Miss Jacqueline, well put. But tonight -- chocolate is justice! May those with a command for the best confectionery win!" she expresses with gleaming exaltation. She's really enjoying this.

        She catches from the corner of her ear that Big Shal is outside. A-aww... she really wanted Big Shal to be here... but, perhaps the gig would be up too soon, because the Golem is not someone she can resist. Instead, it's adorable--

        "It is me, dear Shalune! After what you have done to my chocolate fountain..."

        She dramatically shakes her fist. "That Mountainous friend of yours has quite the appetite! I've no choice but to restock... running a Ruin is terribly difficult logistical work, I shall have you know!"

        That sounded almost too close to whining, like Katherine were emerging for a moment, but alas. She huffs--

        ...rather demurely, she flutters her eyelashes at Loren as he quaffs Jacqueline's potion and rows (with a spoon), laughing as she expresses, "Is ridiculousness not the spice of life? Did you not enjoy extravagance before, in my Garden of Moonlight, my dear?"

        The river of chocolate swishes and turns, every single way; yet, it is still genuinely delicious hot cocoa, and if one were to nip at it -- as Mercedes might find out -- it's at the very least delicious, like the kind one would dip s'mores into before bedtime.

        Finally, they arrive at the end, with the Phantom Thief laughing as she absconds from her bathtub and waltzes on one leg to twirl towards a chamber deeper within--

======================<* La Chocolaterie de Genevieve *>=======================
==================<* CHALLENGE - Like Water for Chocolate *>===================
| Type: Sweeties          |   Dungeon Ability: Hot   | Challenge Rating: Ready |
==========================< Challenge Information: >===========================

A chamber of tempered chocolate, glistening with various colours milk, dark and white... the dread Phantom Thief twirls
her studded cane as she blows a kiss in your direction.

"You all turn me like water for chocolate... it is only now, here, that my passion truly blossoms!"

Her staff twirls -- and she begins to guide strands upon strands of milky-white chocolate, interlacing it with pure-
white peaks... and then sends small blasts of it hurling your way... in the form of hearts!

If you don't dodge, you might get a face-full of chocolate... which would be unfortunate, but also delicious??
=Dungeon Conditions: There's a Metaphor Here===================================
GS: Seraph Amaranth has attacked Margaret with Will You Be My Valentine?!
GS: Seraph Amaranth has attacked Mercedes Hartley with Will You Be My Valentine?!
GS: Seraph Amaranth has attacked Malfi with Will You Be My Valentine?!
GS: Seraph Amaranth has attacked Shalune Amira with Will You Be My Valentine?!
GS: Seraph Amaranth has attacked Loren Voss with Will You Be My Valentine?!
GS: Seraph Amaranth has attacked Jacqueline Barber with Will You Be My Valentine?!
GS: Seraph Amaranth has completed her action.
DC: MISS! Margaret completely evades Thunder Road from Margaret!
GS: Seraph Amaranth heals Margaret! She gains 100 temporary hit points!
GS: Seraph Amaranth heals Jacqueline Barber! She gains 100 temporary hit points!
GS: Seraph Amaranth heals Malfi! She gains 100 temporary hit points!
GS: Seraph Amaranth heals Mercedes Hartley! She gains 100 temporary hit points!
GS: Seraph Amaranth heals Shalune Amira! She gains 100 temporary hit points!
GS: Seraph Amaranth heals Loren Voss! He gains 100 temporary hit points!
<Pose Tracker> Malfi has posed.

"You can call me...Tamryn," Malfi murmurs. She's not about to divulge her real name after all. And that *is* the name she uses this disguise. Cynwen, the one she normally used, had been compromised on the Nota Span, in a battle she still needed to heal a bit from. Malfi berths her teacup and scrambles out, relieved, just in time to get hit in the face by Amaranth's chocolate hearts! She doesn't care about the shape, chocolate is chocolate! She retrieves as many as she can and stows them in her backpack. They're not only tasty, they seem to have healing powers! Just what she needed! "Thanks...whoever you are!"

GS: Malfi has attacked Seraph Amaranth with Beyond the Impale!
GS: Malfi has completed her action.
GS: Seraph Amaranth takes a glancing hit from Malfi's Beyond the Impale for 43 hit points!
GS: Seraph Amaranth enters CONDITION GREEN!!
<Pose Tracker> Mercedes Hartley has posed.

Mercedes Hartley, who has managed to splash one arm with hot chocolate, gratefully accepts a potion from Jacqueline. "Thanks!" she calls, as she gets into a paddling rhythm. She has also finished her 'to go' plate somewhere along the way, probably while trying to straighten herself out.

Well, sort of a rhythm. Mercedes is pretty much completely inexperienced with rowing boats of any sort and teacups don't really have a front end, as such. She tends to spin herself around as much as move herself forward. But she's trying! If nothing else, she is highly energetic about it, though that also means there is a lot of strictly unnecessary splashing. At least it smells delicious?

"It's not so bad if you love chocolate," Mercedes puffs, while she's working on trying to row. "But you still can't go around stealing confectioners, or confectionaries, or anything!" It actually catches her by surprise when her teacup runs aground (...) and she has to get out, clambering into the next chamber full of chocolate...

...right in time for the Phantom Thief to blow a kiss to her. She's really not sure what she thinks of that, as it's confusing in a couple ways, but the Phantom Thief is clearly preparing to send something her way! She opens her mouth to call something to her.

  • splat*


Amaranth couldn't have aimed that shot more perfectly if she had been trying; she hit Mercedes right in the open mouth with the chocolate heart. She swallows, though her mouth is still covered in splattered chocolate. "That's not going to work. I can take whatever chocolate you can throw at me!"

Even if she does look like a bit of a mess.

GS: Mercedes Hartley has attacked Seraph Amaranth with Chocolate Chase!
GS: Mercedes Hartley has completed her action.
<Pose Tracker> Shalune Amira has posed.

        A lot of the fire goes out of Shalune's eyes when she gets rebuked by the Phantom Thief, and for a moment it's as if she's just your average mechanic getting told off by someone older and wiser(??) than her. "O-oh-- oh, um, that's why?" she burbles as she abruptly realizes that she's rather to blame for tonight's heist, shrinking down below the line of her bathtub for a moment and leaving only a mop of pink hair sticking up above its rim.

        "I-it's not as if I knew what was going to happen! I just figured Dinowhatsit would like the snack, and be a good way to climb up at the same time!" she mumbles, feeling a bit guilty about calling the Guardian out for something so frivolous now - even if the Mountain Guardian did seem to like it a lot at the time. She does at least take the opportunity granted by her ducking down to eye Jacqueline next to her semi-surreptitiously, a bit suspicious - and not jealous at all at the alchemist's enthusiasm, nor policing Jay for Lunata's sake, or anything of the sort. Harrumph.

        When they reach the end of the line, she's quick to hop out, chasing after the Phantom Thief with abandon and only skidding to a halt when the seraph wheels around to face them. Her mouth is agape for a moment at their adversary's words, her cheeks staining with girlish colour as she realizes: "--I-I knew it! You're trying to charm Jay! That's your true motive here! Let me tell you, you won't take her away from-- away from the Carakin!" she blurts protectively and just about remembers not to say a certain person's name out loud, pumping her fists--

        --and then squeaking in sheer surprise as the next heart comes for her as well. U-u-uwah...

GS: Shalune Amira enters CONDITION GREEN!!
GS: Shalune Amira has attacked Shalune Amira with M-maidenly feelings...?!!
GS: Shalune Amira has completed her action.
GS: Shalune Amira takes a solid hit from Shalune Amira's M-maidenly feelings...?! for 0 hit points!
<Pose Tracker> Margaret has posed.

 
Margaret looks thunderstruck at Amaranth. During the inevitable i-frames from this shock pose, she wastes her own buff. Nonetheless, into the teacup she goes, settling back and saying, "A chocolate fountain...?" with a certain degree of curiosity.

Swish. Sway. "Her Garden of Moonlight, huh," she mutters to Loren even as he works it on out. Strangely he will find phyiscal labor to be both gradually more and more pleasant and to increase that sense of a backbeat rhythm.

Then!

Mercedes is addressing the thief. Margaret finishes off her drink and tosses it over her shoulder, saying as she does, "Not bad," just in time to get SMACKED in the cheek by the ki-su from the Amaranthu. Her eyes narrow; her brow wrinkles; her face darkens and she shouts, "This entire room - it's a vision of debauchery! And I should know! I -"

She pauses to gather some of it up.

As Margaret sucks her fingers clean she considers. One hand goes to her purse which draws out a card.

She turns it then to show it to Amaranth.

It's the nine of swords, foretelling AGONY AND IMPRISONMENT. "Mmpfh," she says, mouth still full of candy chocolate, as she holds it up. Now I can't put it BACK in my purse, she thinks with increasing consternation. She gives Loren an eloquent look that says DO SOMETHING!
 
Her eyes do cut back to Shalune as the CaraKin comes up. Are the criminals at loggerheads? she wonders.

GS: Margaret has attacked Seraph Amaranth with Killer Hand!
GS: Margaret has completed her action.
GS: Seraph Amaranth takes a solid hit from Mercedes Hartley's Chocolate Chase for 120 hit points!
GS: Seraph Amaranth takes a glancing hit from Margaret's Killer Hand for 41 hit points!
GS: Disrupt! Statuses applied to Seraph Amaranth!
<Pose Tracker> Jacqueline Barber has posed.

"Chocolate is justice, huh...? Very well." Jacqueline replies. ...Mercedes has a good point, though. Jacqueline doesn't notice Shalune's subtle glance in her direction - she's just having a good time!

Eventually, her wind Sorcery gets her to her destination, though a step behind the Phantom Thief. She dismounts and chases after her, only to find her waiting for them...

...with a blown kiss!?

Jacqueline blinks once...then once again, as Shalune makes her declaration.

"W-wait a minute, what...?" Jacqueline stammers in confusion...which is more than enough distraction for her to get hit in the face with a delicious chocolate heart.

...She kind of just stands there, completely thrown off. You'll have to give her a second.

GS: Jacqueline Barber has attacked Jacqueline Barber with Rebooting!
GS: Jacqueline Barber has completed her action.
GS: Jacqueline Barber takes a solid hit from Jacqueline Barber's Rebooting for 0 hit points!
GS: Shield! Statuses applied to Jacqueline Barber!
<Pose Tracker> Loren Voss has posed.

        "Extravagance? Are you kidding me? I almost got killed by a bear," comes his response to those fluttering eyelashes and demure question. Hugged would be more accurate, under the circumstances, but...

        Which is where Margaret pipes up. He rolls his eyes. "An amusement park," Loren replies, flatly, at Margaret's apparent insinuation. "I didn't even see her there. I suppose she was watching."
        It's strange. As demeaning as rowing like this is by nature, there's something almost pleasant about the motion and rhythm to it. As long as he keeps the tempo with the pulse he would swear is almost audible.
        It would be more worrying if it weren't for the fact that he... is not petty enough to let himself drown in a river of chocolate even if it meant that he'd take Margaret with him. In other words, he needs to do this anyway, so why not just go with it? And so it goes, as they beat their way in a bizarre chase after the bathtub-riding thief in their teacups, for the far shore.

        ...Into a chamber of chocolate.
        "Is this sanitary?" the wayward medic asks, and gets his answer in a faceful of chocolate hearts by way of a blown kiss. "Gah!"
        ...Which he of course does grab and eat, it's still chocolate.
        ...Really good chocolate.

        "Spare me your passion or whatever it is you're calling it. I don't have the time for this. Just get on with it and let the lady go." Belatedly, after a look at Mercedes, he rubs at his face. There's a downside to chocolate.

        'DO SOMETHING', Margaret's expression implores.
        Loren's own might as well speak: 'Like what'?

        Before he ultimately sighs out a breath, closes his eyes as if put upon, and shifts his focus and will into the air (and chocolate) around them. He'll steal whatever moisture he can pluck from the environment around him, condense it, shift its state further and--

        At the cost of some rather crumbly chocolate (naught but dust now) he lets loose with an array of freezing needles for the Seraph.

GS: Loren Voss enters CONDITION GREEN!!
GS: Loren Voss has attacked Seraph Amaranth with Aqua Sequence!
GS: Loren Voss has completed his action.
GS: Seraph Amaranth takes a glancing hit from Loren Voss's Aqua Sequence for 54 hit points!
<Pose Tracker> Margaret has posed.

 
As he calls on Ether, the backbeat makes the soundtrack in the back of Loren's mind pick up.

It is thus:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SMBuH21eYrU

Except instead of 'Rolling' it's 'Loren.'

It will always recur whenever he gets hit with this buff, forever.

<Pose Tracker> Seraph Amaranth has posed.

        "Tamryn? My, what a lovely name, for a lovely lady."

        Indeed, the chocolate has healing properties! Is... is this Phantom Thief even worked up to hurt them or anything like that? It rather all just seems like a luxurious game of cat and mouse...

        "I suppose not," Amaranth cattishly responds in turn to Mercedes from where she's mysteriously reclined into a Chesire Cat pose. "But it was just so fun. Lady Genevieve is so generous. But you all have been granting me so much more fun... the most fun of my life, in fact!"

        She huffs very quietly to Margaret with a smile as she says, "Perhaps you'd like to attend as well, Milady? I can promise you a wonderful night and then some..." A pause, as she stares at the card.

        "The Nine of Swords! Why I never--" Amaranth grumps. "The last you'll steal from me is my freedom, dear Black Pearl of Neo-Vane!"

        She sighs at Loren and looks at him, then at Margaret again. "The boy needs some passion in his life. Just what kind of dreadful childhood did he have?" She giggles very faintly and says, "And you complain, but you've certainly been eating a lot of my food, have you not?"

        There's a yelp as Loren's needles fly towards her, and several of them spike her onto her leg--

        Then she forces a luxurious chuckle and bounces on her feet, to run away past the hall of chocolate! She twirls on one side and billows up with her capes, hopping up towards a high rafter as she reveals her next trick--

======================<* La Chocolaterie de Genevieve *>=======================
========================<* CHALLENGE - Irrelephant! *>=========================
| Type: Majestic        |   Dungeon Ability: Big   | Challenge Rating: Mammoth
                        |                          |                         |
==========================< Challenge Information: >===========================

A giant golden elephant...

No, wait, that's no golden elephant! It's gilded with gold leaf plating, but inside is more than a few dozen pounds of
solid chocolate in the shape of an elephant, the mighty Ganachea!

"You'll have to get past my delicious, delicious minion if you want to catch up to me!"

The way she says it almost sounds like she's inviting them to eat it...

Well, still, it stomps on mysteriously able mechanisms (albeit made of tempered chocolate), raising its multiple arms
and wielding scimitar-like blades that... you could probably catch between your teeth and snap.

It'd certainly be tastier than eating steel.
=Dungeon Conditions: A Great Multi-Tusker======================================

        Amaranth perches up atop the giant chocolate elephant and can't help but have a -smile- on her face as Shalune
wilts a little, sweetily expressing, "I forgive you, dear. Just remember, the next time you're in a Ruin, how -hard- it
is for your local friendly Ruin Keeper to keep it in working order!"

        Wouldn't they not be Ruins if that were the case...?

        She gasps /scandalously/ as Shalune accuses her of charming Jacqueline. "Why, perish the thought, young Shalune!
Flirtatious I may be, there is only one whose heart I would want mine stolen from..."

        She smirks.

        "... so, I forgive you-- if you give me your wonderful companion Big Shal!" 

        Ammy your inner Katherine is showing /again/.....
GS: Seraph Amaranth has attacked Margaret with Mighty Ganachea! I Choose You!!
GS: Seraph Amaranth has attacked Mercedes Hartley with Mighty Ganachea! I Choose You!!
GS: Seraph Amaranth has attacked Malfi with Mighty Ganachea! I Choose You!!
GS: Seraph Amaranth has attacked Shalune Amira with Mighty Ganachea! I Choose You!!
GS: Seraph Amaranth has attacked Loren Voss with Mighty Ganachea! I Choose You!!
GS: Seraph Amaranth has attacked Jacqueline Barber with Mighty Ganachea! I Choose You!!
GS: Seraph Amaranth has completed her action.
GS: Malfi guards a hit from Seraph Amaranth's Mighty Ganachea! I Choose You! for 94 hit points!
GS: CRITICAL! Mercedes Hartley takes a solid hit from Seraph Amaranth's Mighty Ganachea! I Choose You! for 281 hit
points!
GS: Hyper! Statuses applied to Seraph Amaranth!
GS: Shalune Amira guards a hit from Seraph Amaranth's Mighty Ganachea! I Choose You! for 106 hit points!
GS: Loren Voss guards a hit from Seraph Amaranth's Mighty Ganachea! I Choose You! for 87 hit points!
GS: Jacqueline Barber takes a solid hit from Seraph Amaranth's Mighty Ganachea! I Choose You! for 148 hit points!
GS: Margaret takes a solid hit from Seraph Amaranth's Mighty Ganachea! I Choose You! for 146 hit points!
<Pose Tracker> Malfi has posed.

Malfi winces as the gilded chocolate elephant's trunk winds itself around her left arm, squeezing and squeezing. It's certain to leave a bad bruise, and possibly crushing damage. How can a being of chocolate be so destructive? She retaliates with her weapon, trying to sever the trunk that's causing her so much pain and inconvenience. She doesn't know if the elephant will bleed or feel pain; it IS chocolate, after all. If only it weren't animate, it would be a real feast!

GS: Malfi has attacked Seraph Amaranth with Beyond the Impale!
GS: Malfi has completed her action.
GS: Seraph Amaranth takes a solid hit from Malfi's Beyond the Impale for 99 hit points!
<Pose Tracker> Mercedes Hartley has posed.

"Well, at least you're having fun..."

Mercedes is, too, not that she'll admit it. This is less deadly than the ruins she's been in, at least. And she still needs to figure out what was up with that card! ...Well, why not ask? "Is that why you sent me the card? To get me to come here to play? Because it's not really a game, is it?"

She realizes Loren is gesturing at her and - well, she's kind of at a loss for anything to wipe her face with. But she tries, using her hands - not that that helps, it just gets them all sticky too. Mercedes is too distracted to notice what bluescreened Shalune and Jacqueline, though she looks at them afterwards, a little worried. "Are you okay?"

Either way, Mercedes points at Amaranth with a brown-stained hand afterwards. "I can catch up to you, still!" And she certainly tries, sprinting across the room before being INTERCEPTED by a HORRIBLE GIGANTIC MONSTER - oh wait, that's chocolate too.

It being chocolate does not prevent it from sweeping down at Mercedes with two of its scimitars. "Waaah!" Mercedes dived forward and avoided getting struck directly, but the scimitar caught in the back straps of her breastplate and literally picked her up by the back; as Ganachea returns to its normal stance, Mercedes is FLUNG upwards, arms pinwheeling.

She lands with a thump on the back of the elephant, some distance behind Amaranth, hard enough to crack the outer layer with her upper body; Mercedes is partially embedded inside the chocolate elephant, with her legs and lower body sticking out and flailing.

There is a sound from behind the Phantom Thief that sounds suspiciously like gnawing, combined with Mercedes occasionally thumping the side to try to pull her head out of the chocolate. If she doesn't stop that soon she's probably going to have a stomachache later, but right now she's more interested in freeing herself.

GS: Mercedes Hartley has activated a Force Action!
GS: Mercedes Hartley has attacked Seraph Amaranth with A Taste of Luxury!
GS: Mercedes Hartley has completed her action.
GS: Seraph Amaranth takes a solid hit from Mercedes Hartley's A Taste of Luxury for 132 hit points!
<Pose Tracker> Loren Voss has posed.

        The comment might be directed towards Mercedes, but Loren sees fit to make a crack anyway: "Fun? This is fun? If you want people to chase you, I suggest taking up a sport. Perhaps one with a ball involved."

        He levels a withering gaze at her. "Excuse yourself. I've got plenty of... of..." Panic briefly takes over his expression as he pauses, as if to backpeddle on where this sentence is headed. "Er-- well-- shut up!"
        Eloquent.
        "--Besides, you're the one who left it lying around!" This is... not turning into his greatest hits, is it. "And you put something in it, didn't you?!"
        ...Is indignant anger what passes for passion for him?

        She leaps away soon after the needling ice strikes her; he falls back a step as if in preparation for a counter that doesn't actually come.

        He would swear he's hearing singing in the back of his mind now, too. This shows outwardly as a slight twitch by the corner of one of his eyes. Whatever she laced the food with, it's potent.
        But no, there is no counter. Instead, from above, she reveals--

        Not for the first time, he stares in disbelief. "...You're kidding me." He rubs at his eyes, glances up at the ceiling, then back at the elephant--

        As it comes in with with a surprisingly deadly pair of blades. "--Who arms a chocolate elephant with swords?!" the now decidedly agitated medic declares, drawing his own from his sheath to meet (stage?) steel in a last-second parry.

        He draws back, blade held before him in a readied stance.

        And he shifts his will and focus downwards, down below the floor and into the earth, taking a deep breath as he does so.

        Drawn by his psyche, the earth answers in an upwards explosion of rock and stone, the pillar scything upwards in a cruel stab for the chocolate elephant. ...Fortunately far to the right of where Mercedes is currently embedded.

GS: Loren Voss has attacked Seraph Amaranth with Terra Set!
GS: Loren Voss has completed his action.
GS: Seraph Amaranth takes a solid hit from Loren Voss's Terra Set for 162 hit points!
GS: Break! Statuses applied to Seraph Amaranth!
GS: Mighty! Statuses applied to Loren Voss!
<Pose Tracker> Jacqueline Barber has posed.

Jacqueline shakes her head, trying to bring herself back to reality...or, rather, whatever constitutes reality in a place like this.

"Y-yes, I'm...I'm okay! A-ahem...anyway...! Back to business." She says with a nod toward Mercedes, still a little shaken.

She seems rather surprised by the idea someone would try to charm her, even if it's mistaken! By the time she's back for real, the Phantom Thief has already bounced away. Jacqueline gives chase...but before Jacqueline can catch her she twirls and jumps up into the rafters, onto a giant golden elephant!

A giant golden chocolate elephant, weaving scimitars about. One of them catches her square in the chest and knocks her back, momentarily winding her...but it doesn't slow her down for long.

"An impressive creation, Phantom Thief! I almost regret...having to do this!" Jacqueline says, drawing a bottle from her bags and hurling it at Ganachea. If it manages to land it'll bury itself in before detonating in a surprisingly soft, fragrant flame. It's enough to melt the sugar-glass of the bottle containing it, and even make Ganachea a little meltier too, to aid in Mercedes escape...

...As well as the consumption of Ganachea, if they choose to.

As for the fire itself, it is not particularly painful, but it does give off smoke that makes one slowly start to feel sleepy.

<Pose Tracker> Margaret has posed.

 
"This isn't about fun, you reprobate!" Margaret shouts at Amaranth. "This woman is your prisoner? Free her immediately or pay the price!" She then tucks her card away because her mouth isn't full.

"Oh, yes," she half-growls half-purr. "That IS the LAST thing I'll take from you... Amaranth!!!!"

Four !'s, the sure sign of a balanced and sane mind.

At which point there is a billowing of capes and the reveal of a sh-- an elephant! Margaret's shocked face reaches new bounds as she says, "How in the name of the Goddess are you managing all these prepostorous feats, thief?! If you can do this, why don't you just swear fealty to some lordling and get a fief in exchange for slaying his enemies with - hm -"

Margaret seems to have figured it out.

The spear is brought back down and she has to futz with it, along with a small silver-and-red-crystal item apparently analogous to a match, to get the head going again.

foowsh! There it goes. Margaret wastes no time to try and stab the elephant in its ribcage. HOW CRUEL! But then, perhaps she wants her chocolate... melted.

GS: Jacqueline Barber has spent 1 Combo on Poison!
GS: Jacqueline Barber has attacked Seraph Amaranth with Apothecary's Fire!
GS: Jacqueline Barber has completed her action.
GS: Margaret has attacked Seraph Amaranth with Straight!!
GS: Margaret has completed her action.
GS: Seraph Amaranth takes a solid hit from Jacqueline Barber's Apothecary's Fire for 160 hit points!
GS: Toxin! Statuses applied to Seraph Amaranth!
GS: Seraph Amaranth takes a solid hit from Margaret's Straight! for 162 hit points!
<Pose Tracker> Shalune Amira has posed.

        Surely that's enough for Shalune to realize the Phantom Thief's identity, right? Such a naked reference to Big Shal makes the mechanic rear back in astonished surprise, her mouth hanging open once more as she repeats the name. "Big... Shal..." she breathes, and this time her eyes positively light up with righteous fire.

        "--you won't have her! I won't let you! I can't let you!" she declares passionately, before pumping her fists once more as she sets her jaw. "Big Shal is for everyone! More to the point, she's not mine to give - it's up to her whether she wishes to go with you, and something like this isn't going to sway her! But more than anything!" she blurts with finality, and pulls her shotstaff from her bag, letting it extend in her hands.

        "But most of all, right now-- there are people who need Big Shal time way more than ever before. Miss Katherine would be really upset if I just let her skip away from that!"

        ... well... ... at least Shalune's heart is in the right place, so there's that...

        Bringing her staff up, the mechanic manages to somewhat block the first of the elephant's attacks, the blade snapping in two as it impacts with her staff; Shalune wavers for a moment as she stumbles backwards. Breaking apart something so fancy feels like it'd be a serious shame, but they can't just let the Phantom Thief go when she's this close--

        --so the mechanic draws in a breath, a hand plunging into one of the deep pockets of her coat for a slim metal canister the same size as the one on the end of her staff, switching it out with a satisfying mechanical 'clunk'. The new one is a vibrant red, and the reason why becomes abjectly clear. Bracing herself and squeezing the trigger, the shotstaff suddenly belches plumes of fire forwards. Shalune isn't trying to actively melt the elephant so much as keep it away, but it's still staggeringly effective.

        (There is no way this would pass the Treaty of Iscariot. Probably.)

GS: Shalune Amira has spent 3 Combo on Headshot!
GS: Shalune Amira has attacked Seraph Amaranth with Glorious Sunset!
GS: Shalune Amira has completed her action.
GS: Seraph Amaranth takes a solid hit from Shalune Amira's Glorious Sunset for 70 hit points!
GS: Break, Disrupt, and Slow! Statuses applied to Seraph Amaranth!
GS: Seraph Amaranth has Fallen! She is no longer able to fight!
<Pose Tracker> Seraph Amaranth has posed.

        "E-ehhh?"

        Amaranth's eyes glint just a little bit as the Drifters descend on her majestic chocolate elephant! Tamryn -- Malfi -- retaliates as mighty Ganachea's trunk is shattered in a shower of delicious nut and raisin-studded 70% cocoa chunks!

        "Wait--"

        Mercedes declares her speed confidently, as she dives past the scimitars -- which are made of a composite milk blade and keening to a white chocolate edge she can detect! -- and lands on the back.

        "Hm hm... well, it would not be fun to not advise people beforehand, right? A theft at night where no one notices -- what fun is that?" Amaranth tries to keep airs as she smiles richly at Mercedes--

        Yikes! "Oh no! Ganachea is being eaten?!" Amaranth is remarkably astounded at Mercedes' ability to eat!! Mmmm, luxurious bits of cookie melded in with a 50% dark cocoa blend... and are those marshmallows studded in there?!

        This is truly a majestic creature!

        "Oh, please, look at you telling people to take up a sport!" Amaranth pompously responds to Loren, grinning. "Don't tell me you haven't worked up a sweat? And had a delectable meal in the-- hehe."

        She can't help but giggle when Loren gets huffy, letting out an 'eek!' as earth shoots upwards and possibly makes some parts of the chocolate elephant too dirty to eat. Loren's the real villain here, Mercedes!

        Amaranth stares gawkingly at Jacqueline and peers towards the flame, gasping to say, "Oh no! No no no, Miss Jacqueline, do not apply heat to the chocolate directly, you must steam it in a double boiler, a banne-marie--"

        The flame erupts and starts to make Ammy and the Giant feel sleeeeeeepy. A nightcap appears ontop of her head for a moment as she yawns. "Oh dear...!"

        Amaranth grumps very lightly at Margaret as she takes a seat near the shoulder of her elephant to protest, "You're so full of indignant anger, dear Margaret! But maybe that's what I like about you... ..."

        She stabs the elephant in the ribcage and out spurts a delectable spicy cocoa mix. Its heart is aflame?!

        And then there's--

        "Aah, why won't you give Big Shal to me?!" Amaranth complains with all too much petulance. "Big Shal is truly wonderful, and I must steal her from you at some point... believe me--"

        She cups her cheek.

        "Well, I suppose this Miss Katherine would be really upset if Big Shal were stolen, yes... ehehe..."

        Ammy, your dignity is sliding...

        But then-- Shalune loads something up in her staff, locking the canister in place. "Ah?"

        It roars upwardsly and blasts plumes--

        *EXPLOSION!*

        The Phantom Thief is pirouetting away past a gap in the newly-crumbled ceiling, which is made out of Graham cookies. "Oh deaaaaaaaar!" she gasps, saying, "I guess the chocolate will have to wait for neeeext - tiiiiime...!"

        Amaranth weaves a pattern with a hand, and makes herself gleam like a star just so that she can go *ting* in the distance.

<Pose Tracker> Seraph Amaranth has posed.

</poem>

==========================< Challenge Information: >===========================

With the Phantom Thief defeated, the illusion begins to melt away...

And a young woman with golden hair is busy luxuriously munching on what seems to be the same wonderful set of hors
d'ouevres and sipping wine from a snifter, before positively going 'giku' at getting caught pigging out.

She clears her throat and wipes her mouth, before glancing around and asking: "Wait, where'd the wonderful lady who
bought me a meal go...??"

....wait, so who got kidnapped here again, exactly??
=Dungeon Conditions: All's Well... that Ends Well?=============================
<Pose Tracker> Jacqueline Barber has posed.

Jacqueline...feels a little like she's been scolded. But, she regains her verve before long!

"My apologies, Phantom Thief...you'll have to endure my experiment!" Jacqueline calls out. ...And then, Shalune finds her determination - her determination to protect Big Shal! And promptly proceeds make the Phantom Thief explode into the air, flying through the ceiling in a comical fashion.

Jacqueline stares, dumb-founded.

"W-well, we can't catch her like this..." She says...but somehow, she doesn't sound upset about it? She then sends Shalune a smile. "Good work, though!"

With that the illusions begin to find...and Jacqueline stares blankly as someone appears, apparently looking startled about being caught. Jacqueline recovers quickly, clearing her throat.

"I'm afraid business was...blowing up, and she had to leave. But, she did want us to check up on you and make sure everything's to your liking." She says with a smile.

...It was probably better if she didn't know the truth.

<Pose Tracker> Shalune Amira has posed.

        Shalune also gikus, because for a moment she has a terrible premonition of accidentally roasting the poor Heiress stood in front of them; she fumbles at the off switch for her shotstaff, and it takes her a very long and confused moment before she realizes she isn't actually even holding it. Left behind by the illusion, she's instead gesturing wildly with the neatly wrapped up bag of chocolate bonbons and truffles sat in her palm, adorned with a little ribbon and bow.

        After a long moment, she huffs grumpily. "Ugg, we let her escape," the pink-haired girl mumbles as if that weren't also mostly her fault; at least she's quick to recover from it in the short term. "... a-are you alright, ma'am?" she burbles, trying to make the best of things and - at the same time - stall while she gathers her bearings together.

        Not that she's really listening to the young noble's answer, to be honest. She's still trying to work out the latest riddle that the Phantom Thief has left for them. Shalune's sharper than she looks, and caught the telltale comment - their next lead, perhaps, or at least a definite path to pursue:

        "... maybe we can use Big Shal as bait..." she mumbles to herself, and then her brow furrows in serious concentration as she glances at Jay. "... but-- does she know Miss Katherine...?"

        ... the Phantom Thief's escapades may last a while yet...

<Pose Tracker> Mercedes Hartley has posed.

Mercedes Hartley is a known big eater. It's just normally she does it with more than treats. Still, at least it's probably some of the best treats she's had... even when she ends up getting a mouthful of hot fudge (?) when Margaret stabs inwards and upwards, and then rapidly finds the rest of the back of the elephant melting around her...

Mercedes is blasted out of the back of the chocolate elephant when Amaranth is blasted upwards, along with a flood of half-melted chocolate and entirely melted chocolate. She is basically completely coated in the stuff from the ribs up; there is chocolate all over her tunic, her armour, her face, even in her hair.

She staggers around, blinded, as the illusion vanishes, before tripping on something and falling onto her butt. "Whoof. I'm stuffed...!" Mercedes tries to wipe some of the chocolate off her face (with no real success) before looking around through the chocolate glaze she currently possesses and trying to find the heiress. "Hello? Hello! I hear you! We're here to, um... rescue... you? From... getting lost? In your back rooms?"

Yeah this was not her greatest 'think on her feet' moment.

<Pose Tracker> Margaret has posed.

 
Margaret is wearing about 320 silver - all told - of cosmetics, unique gown made with a new concept, hair pinup, the cost of getting her hair styled, and most of it is reduced to a messy gloppy smear as the heart's choc of the oliphant sqplurts all over her arm and face. Her eyes close, her mouth opens.

She does smack her lips though.

If you intend to do something without the knowledge of the Guard, now is the time! "Excuse me, THOMAS," declares Margaret -

Will he make his escape before she can chide him? "Ugh it's in my eyelashes."

<Pose Tracker> Malfi has posed.

Malfi feels a bit disoriented as the illusion fades...what is real and what isn't? At length she finds herself back in the dark, closed chocolate shop. She helps herself to a few more items (again leaving coin to cover her best estimate of their cost). Oh...those aren't just truffles, they're mocha truffles! And are those coconut-almond chocolate chunk cookies? And a fudgy cake labeled "doberge"? And mint thins? And peanut-butter cups? And...is that a COFFEE MAKER in the corner?!? Malfi rushes over to investigate -- it is, indeed, a coffee maker. She takes the chance to refill her thermos with good Lunarian coffee, having emptied it while holed up regenerating after the fight on the Nota Span. At least, she thinks with relief, the coffee is real. It had better be.

<Pose Tracker> Loren Voss has posed.

        "Stop redirecting the conversation!" he snaps back at Amaranth. "You're the one so eager for other people to chase you around!"

        He treads back a step, sword held steady before him as the pillar of stone and earth rips and tears. It will occur to him later that this may not be the best way to handle a chocolate elephant -- at least not if they intend on eating it afterwards.

        A bottle goes hurling overhead. That one, Loren barely notes. He only barely notes that other woman's sword-first stab for the trunk, or Margaret's own heated stab.

        What does get his attention: the bright red of that cannister as Shalune pulls it out. And the aftermath of what it produces. Technically speaking, that's probably in violation of some... sort of code of what technology Lambs are supposed to possess and...

        Wait a minute. Wait a minute--!

        He steps backwards several months -- nearly a year -- back in time to Bledavik and a certain altercation with a girl and her Golem.

        Wait a minute!!!

        His gaze falls on Big Shal, and with a certain change of paint he... yes, can put two and two together now.

        But this is neither the time nor the place.
        Or the right planet, for that matter.

        But mostly not the right time, as the chocolate elephant has exploded spectacularly, taking Amaranth out to the heavens with the blast. Loren staggers back a step, wiping some of the melt from his face.

        "...Ugh," he utters, making a face in spite (because of) of the chocolate mess he's drenched in.
        How is he going to explain this incident?

        That Amaranth woman is behind Claire de Lune.
        That book. 'Hexennacht'.

        His gaze falls on the apparent heiress. "Well, look at that. She's safe," he says, dry as always. "I'll leave this in your capable hands." This he directs to Jay, 'Malfi' and Mercedes, his gaze lingering a moment on Shalune as he swings his blade through the air in an attempt to free it from chocolate sludge.
        It doesn't... work. So much for looking cool.

        This is undercut further by Margaret calling out his name in that tone.

        Very quickly there's a blinking gap where 'Thomas' had just been.