2018-09-05: Having Faith

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  • Log: Having Faith
  • Cast: Riesenlied, Lily Keil
  • Where: New Petra
  • Date: 5th September 2018
  • Summary: Lily visits Riesenlied and the Outreach after the events at Adlehyde.


<Pose Tracker> Riesenlied has posed.

The Outreach fled from Adlehyde following the climactic battle with the Metal Demons.

They've headed towards a certain frontier village -- Old Petra, which last year was reduced to little more than rubble following the explosion from Id's crimson Gear...

... yet, when Lily arrives, it's clear that the Waysiders have done the best they can to throw up buildings to house the people of Azado. They're prefab in the best sense, capable of being bolted together within a couple of hours to provide shelter and housing for many people at once...

This is one of the essences of the Wayside Outreach's humanitarian efforts.

But where is Riesenlied in all of this? If she asks around, a worker confusedly looks around before saying that she should've been here -- before someone else points out she left to her room in the Fereshte itself.

<Pose Tracker> Lily Keil has posed.

It's only fair for them to have left; frankly, Lily Keil wonders if she should have gone with them immediately. But if she's going to think about the past, then there's little better place to do it than Old Petra--Old Petra, where Lily came, where she fought the Demon of Elru... where she saw such incredible devastation. And now, its ruins are bustling with hope.

Lily can't help but think of forest mushrooms in the cold woods of the Kislev mountain ranges.

In the moment, however, Lily is by no means a comforting sight to the people of Azado, but is at least known to those of the Outreach. Approaching the makeshift village, Lily passes off her black horse to one of the Tainted she recognizes, with a nod, and approaches on foot. She walks quietly, somewhat slowly; her pallor makes it clear that she's still recovering from her injuries... and those injuries include some very obvious things.

Lily wears borrowed clothes again, as her own are largely on the Feresthe still. She did not elect for the delicate fashions of the ladies of the court, however. Instead, Lily wears dark slacks and a buttoned dress shirt, belted, with a black vest. The collar is open, rather than having a tie, and it fits... surprisingly well, though the strange markings on her throat and hands are clear. Most notable however are the bandages wound about her dark hair, the way some of her face is covered, revealing a single golden eye. ...Her makeup at least hides some of the fatigue, but even so--

A woman with a gunbelt on and a too-intense look is not exactly one who exudes welcome and calm. Lily finds herself walking around town, though, asking around--she can feel Riesenlied here... somewhere, she thinks, but--

"Ah," Lily answers. "...Thank you."

-=-=-

"...Riesenlied?" Lily asks, rapping the back of her hand on the doorway to Riesenlied's cabin.

<Pose Tracker> Riesenlied has posed.

There's a quiet pip and a rustle from the room; Riesenlied's opted for some alone time it would seem, by the way no one else responds for a while. When the door next opens, Riesenlied is there--

--her face is rather evidently stained with dried tears, and bears no small amount of fatigue and exhaustion. She isn't the type to wear makeup unlike Lily, so there's nothing really hiding that from view as she clings against the doorframe.

Her expression and movements are stiff and rattled, tense and anxious as she tries to put her best smile on. "Miss Lily... I'm--"

She casts a glance towards those bandages, lowering her head. She knew Lily was deeply injured, and she could not sense her magic from when they were headed down the Flooded Ruins...

"I'm glad to see... see you here." Her normally soft voice feels heavier, disturbed.

<Pose Tracker> Lily Keil has posed.

Lily waits. ...In point of fact, she leans lightly on the wall when no one is here to see her but one, who isn't going to repeat it. So she's still there by the time Riesenlied opens the door, and Lily looks into her eyes first--tear-stained, lined with exhaustion. Then down, then up, as if checking for obvious injuries. ...It's not a kind gaze, exactly, not at first--

"It's fine," Lily answers Riesenlied, with a light shake of her head. "You don't have to pretend for me. It's all right, after everything, to..."

She can't quite find the word. She remembers how awful it all was; how much worse must it have been?

Dog, however, is better emotionally than Lily, and pads forward to nose at Riesenlied's shin before sitting down and looking up at her with large, dark eyes.

"...Honestly," Lily says, "Is it strange if I say I'm more comfortable here than back in the city? ...I have so little in common with those people anymore." She pauses. "Would you like to sit down? Here. We'll support each other. I'm not recovered yet, either."

Lily offers her arm. ...It seems that being so open is... effort, for her, but she does it regardless.

<Pose Tracker> Riesenlied has posed.

It's... rare, perhaps, to see the usually endlessly optimistic -- if reserved -- Riesenlied so downcast. Her aura doesn't feel as bright, if Lily can sense it; it feels flat and downhearted.

Riesenlied did sustain injuries, but those have been taken care of by Noeline and Cetiri and the others, it would seem; they've just about gotten used to the Hyadean getting injured on a regular basis.

"I--I'm not trying to pr--" Riesenlied hitches a little, her voice breaking. She softly reaches towards Dog for a moment, stroking at the adorable canine's side.

"I... would not say it is strange, but it is... unfortunate." Lily offers her arm, and she leans on it for a moment. Good thing too, since she doesn't look like she's particularly stable or capable of much walking at present. She reaches for a soft one-sided hug, not wanting to overwhelm Lily too much.

She sucks in a shallow breath, through the hiccup of tears. "Were-- were they asking for me? I had to step away for a moment. It was a bit... a bit much..."

<Pose Tracker> Lily Keil has posed.

Lily can't help but be concerned for Riesenlied; it's near the top of her mind, easy to feel if Riesenlied is open to it just as Riesenlied's aura is... flat. Different.

"...I'm sorry," Lily replies to Riesenlied's protest, glancing to the side. She hadn't meant to make it worse, only--

Dog wags her tail as Risenlied strokes her, looking up at the Tainted woman with a simple happiness in her presence despite the difficulty in the air.

"They just don't fill me with much optimism about humans," Lily admits--and the soft hug is fine, something Lily can accept as she guides Riesenlied back towards somewhere they can sit down. She has to look to find such a place, of course--

Lily's discomfort with pysical contact is something she can work through when she feels it's important. ...But Lily offers the arm on her blind side. "They all seem very busy," Lily answers. "...But they weren't just now. You have some time to rest."

Lily glances down, and her free hand curls into a fist. "...You deserve better than you've been given," she says quietly, glances to the side again, as Dog follows. She makes sure to close the door behind.

<Pose Tracker> Riesenlied has posed.

Riesenlied doesn't look like she blames Lily, of course, it's just that natural concern of hers, as she would for anyone... and doubly so for someone as close to her as Lily. Like mirrors, they can feel what each other does, even if briefly... and the harm that's befallen her darker twin is--

It's painful for her.

With Lily's help, she can lower herself back down towards her own bed; Noeline's helped make sure it's stocked with everything she might need in the short-term, like water and a glass decanter of medicine as well as some berries on the side.

"I--I've been... rattled... my voice feels-- barely there, I'm easily pushed to tears," Riesenlied expresses very quietly. "I want to be there for the others, I want to be present for the refugees... but..."

A pause, as she hitches her breath and draws a little closer. "... their anger is natural given what I've done... despite my desire to-- to minimise casualties, it doesn't change what's happened..." She sounds rather fatalistic about it.

<Pose Tracker> Lily Keil has posed.

The feeling of what happened with Lily... It was difficult. And then it was nothing. Her magical signature, at least, was simply /gone/, and the pulse of power that makes her strange presence possible to locate was silent. ...It isn't, anymore. But it was for a while, and the harm--

Well, it's significant.

Lily helps Riesenlied down, and stands at first to look her over before she sits at Riesenlied's left. She glances to the medicine, but doesn't move for it yet. Instead...

"You can't be present for anyone if you don't take time to recover. They need you strong; it's better if you take the time to regain that strength." Lily's voice is quiet, firm... but not ungentle, this time. Dog in the meantime curls at Riesenlied's feet.

Lily watches Riesenlied, and she too has a tiny spark of anger, though it's dull, distant. "It doesn't," Lily agrees. "...But they're hurting themselves, refusing aid. What matters... is what you choose to do today, tomorrow. ...In the way I was taught..." She stops, looks down.

"Being honest, they can all hang as far as I'm concerned. ...Is there something I can do for you? I don't..." She purses her lips. "You know... that you're important to me."

<Pose Tracker> Riesenlied has posed.

It's scary.

For the longest time Lily's magical signature was... /hers/, like an aura-- like the empathic equivalent of seeing an 'identity' for Riesenlied, so to have it be gone was like... like having something to integral be removed. It was, to say the least, jarring.

"I know. I know... it's just-- I'm not used to... feeling like that," Riesenlied admits. As much trauma and stress as she's used to experiencing, receiving... being at ground zero of a grave disaster like that is something else entirely.

Lily asks her if there's something she can do for her. She purses her own lips.

"... I'm feeling deeply... conflicted... confused," Riesenlied admits honestly. "Lord Siegfried--" A pause, as she lowers her head. "I'm still calling him that. ... I want to call him father, still. I genuinely do."

She swallows.

"People want him dead. He makes... makes no outward motion of repentance or that he can be swayed from his course. Of... of course that would be the natural... so much has happened because of his actions--"

She hitches again, breathing erratically. "But I still... I don't know how to deal with still wanting to see him well... I can't stop feeling like his-- his--" She bites her lip.

"His daughter."

<Pose Tracker> Lily Keil has posed.

Whether it's comforting or not, Lily's magic has returned; her aura is her own once again. ...It's almost as if she died and returned, with the way it's just as it was before now.

"No one is," Lily answers with surety. "...Anyone would need time to recover after an experience like that. I'm sure you've seen it, in those among the Tainted who came to you after what they experienced in battle, injured or not." She pauses. "...Even worse, when you can feel what's happening. I found it overwhelming too."

But what can Lily do? She listens attentively to the answer, and it feels... it's not familiar, exactly. It's something like it, something near--

'People want him dead.' Lily quiets, eye still on Riesenlied. And...

"...You are," Lily says softly. "No matter what he does, no matter what happens... You are his daughter. You can turn your back on him, but that relationship changes--it doesn't... go away." That hangs on the air for a moment, as Lily looks out across the room.

"...I don't think people who haven't experienced something like it can understand," the sorceress says. "I don't think they /want/ to understand. Thinking of it simply; vengeance for vengeance, an eye for an eye," she half-scoffs at what could be her own joke. "...But I don't think that's the solution."

"They do want him dead, and it makes sense. But where does it stop? What do we do, with those who /survive/ provided that we win our battle against Mother?"

"I know it's not typical for me to be the one saying something like this. ...But I think Elly was right. Your desire to see him well... it's sentiment, just as those who want revenge on him are relying on sentiment. But is it so strange, to care for someone even when you're opposed to him?:"

<Pose Tracker> Riesenlied has posed.

Riesenlied feels a level of subconscious comfort in how Lily's magic is returned; she might not be able to vocalise it entirely, but much like how Noeline's presence calms her on an empathic level... Lily's does too.

"Yes, you're right..." Riesenlied thinks of-- so many different moments when soldiers would visit her and admit to the stresses they've experienced in battle. Oftentimes, they were confused at the non-physical stresses they were experiencing...

She nods quietly-- and listens still as Lily explains that she can't change the fact that there's still a relationship there.

"... you're right. He is dear to me," Riesenlied expresses. "I can't simply let go of the decades upon decades of..." Could she say it was care? Siegfried was not exactly an open and loving father, but the way he showed his care, in making sure she was clothed, fed, that she had access to training...

It was more than she'd ever thought she would get.

"It was hard, to hear him bury himself deeper. I could hear his heart closing, but... but I sincerely believe that it is not stone, deep down there."

But what will happen, if they win the battle against Mother?

"... I truly do not know what is happening now in the Photosphere," Riesenlied admits. "From how intense her hatred ran deep when I first gazed upon her brief awakening... I do not doubt that there has been some-- great shift in culture or direction..."

She bites her lip. "But I will be there. I won't be able to sway all my brethren, and there will be a lot of strife, but... I want to help pick up the pieces. I still believe in that future... where we can find that path to coexistence..."

<Pose Tracker> Lily Keil has posed.

Lily /is/ her magic, to her mind; who would she be without it?

Lily has had soldiers visit her for the same reason, helped talk them through, and either sent them back to the battlefield or recommended them for return for a time from the front. That's its own matter, of course--but Lily found long ago that she has more in common with the Metal Demons than she would have expected. ...Thanks to Riesenlied, in fact.

"You can't... And to be honest, it would seem a sign of faithlessness. It's true that it would be easier in some ways, if you could throw that relationship away and commit yourself only to what must be done. ...But that isn't your way. People look to you, trust in you, because of the sincerity of your cause--because of your /empathy/, not your ruthlessness. Let that show through. ...That's my belief."

She pauses, and looks down. "I believe you," Lily says. "Not in everything--I don't share your optimism--but I do in this, on him. I don't know whether it will be possible for you to get through to him. ...But the attempt matters. Ordinarily I'm of the opinion that the best enemy is a dead enemy... but I think in this case we need to look to the future. ...If we don't, we may not /have/ one."

Lily considers. "...I don't, either. But I know you'll be there. ...You'll be doing what many of us /can't/. Myself included."

<Pose Tracker> Riesenlied has posed.

Riesenlied closes her eyes as she cups her hands to that necklace of hers, the Dragon's Tear. It reverbs with her own anxiety for a moment, pulsing through a colour of red to orange. She sucks in a deeper breath.

"... you're right..." Riesenlied whispers. "He told me that 'that fool is dead and buried'. But he speaks with such anguish that... I do not fully believe it."

A pause, as she frowns quietly. "I won't close the door... I won't... stop extending my hand. Because he offered his when I was at my poorest, and you are right -- I am not so faithless as to forget about that... that is not my way."

She wicks away a tear that's formed on her eye, then looks back up and breathes a little bit easier. A little less shaky. "It means so much to hear that from you... I've learnt a lot since I've met you all... hehe..."

<Pose Tracker> Lily Keil has posed.

Lily looks over the Dragon's Tear, considering its colors. ...Her own markings remain faintly luminous, shifting between the colors of her magic without a particular spell to weight one over the other. Lily remains quiet for a moment.

"If anyone can reach him... It's you. I think that's best. ...It suits you. It uses your strengths. As you say... Doing otherwise isn't your way."

Lily tilts her head, looking over Riesenlied after that tear, seeing her breathe easier at least. "...Well..." Lily sighs, glancing to the ceiling. "It's strange to be saying it, I admit. I feel so much... anger. So much hatred, all the time. But Elly interceded for him... And I saw the wisdom in what she was saying. I knew, somehow, that it was true, that I could see what it meant, what it means now."

"I've spent all my life fighting for the grudge of men centuries dead. Was it ever worth it? ...I don't have faith in humanity, anymore. I don't have faith in much at all."

Lily glances down again. "But as long as you hold onto hope... I know that even if I don't have that faith, it exists somewhere. And I want to protect your light."

Lily turns to Riesenlied, and offers a very small smile. "So I'll be with you. ...It feels like meeting you was so long ago, now. That..."

She shakes her head, offers a hand, palm-up. "...I don't know if we can trust any nation to aid us in this matter. But I'm forming a plan. I have a lead on where Mother will have awakened. ...One way or another, we'll put this to an end. That's the only way there's any hope of seeing your new world."

<Pose Tracker> Riesenlied has posed.

Riesenlied can't help but smile, a little cheered as Lily says that about her. "You once chided me on trying to force myself into something I wasn't. After the Summer Palace. I've not forgotten those words... I'll play to my strengths..."

She cups her hand to her cheek for a moment, brushing a hand to her scales. "... I want to thank Elly... and check on her. She was harmed, by him even, but... even then--" she nods. "She's a source of strength for me as well... I've got a lot to learn from her."

She's silent for a while longer, as Lily admits she doesn't have faith in humanity... but that that faith does exist somewhere. "When we went to see Lombardia... when I heard how much pain were in her words, how weary she'd become..." A pause, and a tilt of her head. "It inspired me to-- try to carry that torch a little longer. None of us can carry it for all eternity, no matter how long we live... but as long as I can at least inspire another generation to hope for the better..."

She nods as she holds Lily's hand. She's looking more stable now. "... oh? Last I knew, Mother's cocoon was in the Photosphere, but... it is possible she moved... I don't actually know if she-- can." She furrows her brow. "And as of nations... I was thinking of speaking with King Ardryn of Lacour. I've spoken to him before and -- if nothing else, I hope that he will hear my plea for the people of Azado..."

Riesenlied nods once more. "It feels like it's been so long, but it was only a year ago... and-- I've felt very happy to know you, Miss Lily."

<Pose Tracker> Lily Keil has posed.

"I did," Lily remembers. "I'll do it again if I have to. ...But it seems you understand what I was trying to say." That sees Lily look a little more like her usual self, just for a moment. Lily glances to Riesenlied's hand, but doesn't linger on the scales; they are not so strange to her. And Elly...

"...Mm, yes," Lily agrees. "I worry about her. But she's strangely easy to talk to. I can't explain it. It's like..." Lily stops, laughs faintly, shakes her head. "Nevermind. That wouldn't make any sense. She'll recover from the injuries she suffered; the worst was a broken arm."

Lily can offer that much reassurance, at least. But on faith...

"...Mm. You have that quality... Inspiration. You have..." Lily trails off again. She doesn't finish that sentence. Instead--

"It's possible that the location is the same; my source will be contacting me soon with the details, now that we've returned. ...Each of the Statues we've sealed, you see, directs its magic towards the seal; find enough of them, and understand how to view it... and you can learn where the seal lies."

"...But it's something I think is best not to share with many. Not until we're ready."

She considers the matter of nations next, thoughtfully. "I--" She pauses, though. Riesenlied's words...

"You... You don't have to be so formal," Lily answers Riesenlied. "Just 'Lily' is fine, for you. All right?"

"...Ah, I hope he does listen. The King, that is."

<Pose Tracker> Riesenlied has posed.

The thought of triangulating where the seals' magic are pointed towards... reminds her of the behavioural habits of a certain suspicious-behaving man. She isn't certain if Lily is referring to the same person, but... if it is--

Well, she kind of has a low self-esteem regarding on whether he trusts her or not anyway...

"I'll keep it hushed. It's a good policy," Riesenlied nods. "And I hope so too... much can happen in the span of a year..."

A pause, as Lily insists that she just be called-- "Okay, Lily," she nods bashfully, knowing that she uses 'Miss' and 'Mister' a lot out of sheer habit.

<Pose Tracker> Lily Keil has posed.

Lily doesn't say her source's name. ...The important part for now is just the information, to her. And there is a certain amount of secrecy to which she's accustomed. But...

"I thought you should know, at least. I would also trust Noeline with this information, though not much farther; the chance of accidentally spreading it is... problematic. Everyone will know sooner or later, but best that they know after we're prepared."

"...All right," Lily answers about her name after a moment. Rarely--never--does she extend this sort of familiarity... But Riesenlied is different. This situation is different. It's--

"...Yes. A lot can happen. So much..."

Lily bites her lip, looking into nothing.

"...I understand. I do. The difficulty..."

She looks down. "I may... need to seek out my father." She pauses. "...But that can be for later. Do you think you should rest?"

<Pose Tracker> Riesenlied has posed.

Riesenlied nods and admits, "Noeline is much more skilled at processing and handling sensitive information than I am anyway..." A pause, as she furrows her brow.

She closes her eyes for a moment. She knows Lily to be a reserved person, so to have this familiarity...

She opens her eyes again. "If you... do, with your father, I want to be there to support you." Lily asks her if she should rest--

"Ah, er-- yes, I should rest," as she sits back down on her bed. "Thank you for visiting me, Lily." Aww, she did it!

<Pose Tracker> Lily Keil has posed.

Noeline the spy; Riesenlied... something else. Something valuable, though.

Lily does not draw further attention to her reserve. Instead, she watches Riesenlied for a moment, silent. Her gaze lingers, as the moment stretches. "...Yes," she answers. "That would... make it easier."

...So why doesn't it sound like she's planning on it? ...Lily doesn't answer; she's aware that her feelings may betray her, so after a moment she says, "I appreciate it. Your support helps."

She rises, at that, and inclines her head. "I'm glad we could talk. ...That I could see you, after everything. I may go visit my own cabin, though. ...It's..."

"Well, it's quieter up here." A beat, "Take care, Riesenlied. I'll see you later."

Dog starts to rise, too, though she wags her tail up at Riese before she follows Lily out.