2019-09-27: Best Friends Forever
- Log: Best Friends Forever
- Cast: Loren Voss, Tabitha deVriese, Fei Fong Wong
- Where: The Moonflow
- Date: September 27, 2019
- Summary: Loren gets a trip on the Degustation Course. Unfortunately for him, so have Tabitha and Fei.
DG: A party led by Loren Voss is now entering Ride ze Shoopuf. DG: Party formation is now over. An Entry Challenge will now be drawn and displayed to the party.
=============================<* Ride ze Shoopuf *>============================== ===================<* CHALLENGE - Hiya! Here's your Yakko *>==================== |Type: Entry |Dungeon Ability: Agility |Challenge Rating: 2 | ---------------------------< Challenge Information: >--------------------------- On one particular fine day in a lull amidst your many adventures, you and your friends and family -- or acquaintances, or even complete strangers! -- acquire tickets to a fanciful Degustation Course aboard one of the Moonflow's Shoopufs. The open-air cabin atop the Shoopuf's back is lavish and comfortable, with long couches piled with pillows and blankets. Complimentary beverages and other such pleasant amenities are also included. Some time into the journey, overlooking a gorgeous view of the Moonlillies, your chauffeur speaks up. "Thank you for riding ze Shoopuf today," he speaks through a quaint speaker attached to the corner of your cabin. "Sshortly, we would like to begin ze degustation, starting with ze appetizer..." A small round table bearing the appearance of a Magic Pot emerges from the centre. A sweet purple cloud poofs out from the top, and out comes...! A Lucan delicacy of hiyayakko, featuring a Spiran staple of silken tofu garnished with soy sauce, green onions, perilla leaves, the rinds of yuzu oranges, and daikon radish. Now, if you were a Spiran native, you may just be familiar with how slippery and fragile silken tofu is. But if you've been raised on Ignasian staples... beware! =Dungeon Conditions: Slow=====================================================
<Pose Tracker> Loren Voss has posed.
Loren frankly blames this on Lan. He already blames it on her now, and it is likely he will blame it on her even more in the future.
Let's back a little bit. Probably precisely because of his current state, Lan had presented him with a ticket. How she'd gotten it, he hadn't asked, and neither is he entirely certain he wants to know. He'd tried to turn it down.
She hadn't let him. First she'd frowned, then she'd said she was worried about him, and then -- devastatingly -- had looked like she was going to cry. And what was he supposed to do about that?
So he'd accepted it.
Which had then led her needling him to use it for a few days, until he'd finally gone just to get her off his case.
Right now, it's days yet until a certain engagement party and all that follows it.
Right now, even with the promise of food on the table, Loren is an unhappy camper.
This may be partially-to-entirely due to his current companions on this little food-cruise.
On the plus side, the food does smell good when it's set before him. Some kind of tofu? --wait.
He's seen this before--
FLASHBACK TO SEVERAL MONTHS PRIOR
"It's called silken tofu, Loren! Look how soft it is!"
Loren attempts to pick up a piece with chopsticks. This fails miserably; he's left with shredded fragments.
NOW
...the tragedy cannot repeat itself.
He fidgets with the 'bracelet' circling his right wrist and faintly grimaces. ...This isn't the usual way he uses Ether, but... perhaps now is the time for an especially deft touch.
DG: Loren Voss has used his Tool Ether Tuner toward his party's challenge, Hiya! Here's your Yakko.
<Pose Tracker> Tabitha deVriese has posed.
Tabitha deVriese is leaning luxuriously against her bench back, elbows tucked up on the edges in such a way as to heighten and emphasize her...physicality. She somehow found a shirt with a neckline that's just missing where the first two buttons should be, which is the most Tabitha thing sartorially possible.
She's got her eyes out on the far edges of the cabin, on the Moonflow itself and the visual wonders beyond. "You know, lately I don't bother much with travel like this. But there's a novelty to it, don't you think, Thomas?"
Tabitha does not have a pseudonym. Because she's just a pure innocent perfect soul, you see.
And then the food starts arriving. Tabitha slips forward a bit to take a look. "You learn a lot about a culture from its food, you know," she muses. "What it values, what its climate was like - hah, when there is a climate, I guess. I wonder, do they just eat stones in Kislev? I've never been."
She makes no attempt at care on her first swipe, and very probably destroys everything she touches.
"....ah," she says. "Or, if you like effort with your meals, I guess," she muses.
DG: Tabitha deVriese has contributed a Agility Basic Action toward her party's challenge, Hiya! Here's your Yakko.
<Pose Tracker> Fei Fong Wong has posed.
Fei blames himself, or maybe God?
Fei has been raised on Ignasian staples, and he seems to be having trouble with the tofu. It keeps slipping out and he goes 'dah!' every time a little too loudly. "I love all foods, but this...this food must learn consideration for others!"
He senses the TUNING OF ETHER and looks, for the first time, towards Loren.
He sweats. He was sort of hoping that he could pretend they weren't there? But now he looked over and...it's too late!
"Uh..." He says, then laughs awkwardly. "Hello... fellow...gourmands...!" He is as stiff as a board right now.
This isn't helping the noodle seizing.
He frowns at Tabitha's words.
"Are you saying...that the noodles represent the Summoner's Pilgrimage and the difficulty in bringing a Calm to Spira?"
He sounds kind of impressed that Tabitha figured that out.
DG: Fei Fong Wong has contributed a Agility Basic Action toward his party's challenge, Hiya! Here's your Yakko.
=============================<* Ride ze Shoopuf *>============================== ===================<* CHALLENGE - Hiya! Here's your Yakko *>==================== |Type: Entry |Dungeon Ability: Agility |Challenge Rating: 2 | ---------------------------< Challenge Information: >--------------------------- On one particular fine day in a lull amidst your many adventures, you and your friends and family -- or acquaintances, or even complete strangers! -- acquire tickets to a fanciful Degustation Course aboard one of the Moonflow's Shoopufs. The open-air cabin atop the Shoopuf's back is lavish and comfortable, with long couches piled with pillows and blankets. Complimentary beverages and other such pleasant amenities are also included. Some time into the journey, overlooking a gorgeous view of the Moonlillies, your chauffeur speaks up. "Thank you for riding ze Shoopuf today," he speaks through a quaint speaker attached to the corner of your cabin. "Sshortly, we would like to begin ze degustation, starting with ze appetizer..." A small round table bearing the appearance of a Magic Pot emerges from the centre. A sweet purple cloud poofs out from the top, and out comes...! A Lucan delicacy of hiyayakko, featuring a Spiran staple of silken tofu garnished with soy sauce, green onions, perilla leaves, the rinds of yuzu oranges, and daikon radish. Now, if you were a Spiran native, you may just be familiar with how slippery and fragile silken tofu is. But if you've been raised on Ignasian staples... beware! =Dungeon Conditions: Slow=====================================================
========================<* Ride ze Shoopuf - Round 1 *>========================= =====================< Results - Hiya! Here's your Yakko >====================== Player Exhaustion Pass/Fail -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Loren Voss 0 --(20)--> 20 Fail Ether Tuner 1 Agility Effects: Quicken and Rally -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Fei Fong Wong 0 --(20)--> 20 Fail Rush 0 Agility Effects: BASIC -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Tabitha deVriese 0 --(15)--> 15 Pass Rush 0 Agility Effects: BASIC -----------------------------------< Party >------------------------------------ Leader: Loren Voss 0 --(10)--> 10 Fail Conditions: Slow(2) Effects: Quicken(1) ===============================< Dream Chasers >================================
DG: The party led by Loren Voss has failed this challenge! The party gained 10 exploration! If anyone needs to use party management commands, do so now. Otherwise, the next round's GM may begin the next round with +dungeon/draw.
<Pose Tracker> Loren Voss has posed.
Why are you here, is what Loren thinks very very hard in Tabitha's direction but does not give to voice. His stare may suggest some of the question.
It at least means he's not staring at her chest. This is not to say he'd stare good and long at anyone's chest otherwise (he'd look, he's only human, but he's not slime) but the fact that this is Tabitha means that he can't even dignify that part of her attire with so much as a glance because she'd know and probably voice this fact he'd rather die first than give her the satisfaction.
It has turned into a tense appetizer round.
"Uh huh," he says, sounding dubious. "...Anyway, how should I know? I wasn't in Kislev."
This is before he finally, finally turns his head to regard their... other tablemate.
...He's not paying Tabitha any attention now.
"You."
His tone drips acid. "What are you doing here?"
This is bad timing on Loren's part--
that poor tofu
it's been evisecerated
Perhaps Fei's fortunes are similarly unfavorable-- silken tofu is slippery and difficult to manage--
Tabitha meanwhile continues with her appetizer round.
If there is evidence of one thing when the disaster of an appetizer is over and done with it is this:
There is no god. Tabitha has killed him.
Eventually Loren's shredded and ruined silken tofu is taken away.
The tragedy... has repeated itself.
DG: Tabitha deVriese has drawn a new Challenge.
============================<* Ride ze Shoopuf *>============================= ====================<* CHALLENGE - The Over-ton Window *>===================== |Type: Exploration |Dungeon Ability: Agility |Challenge Rating: 1 | --------------------------< Challenge Information: >-------------------------- As a two-way service, you sometimes encounter other Shoopufs headed the way you came from. The ride stops for a moment as your Shoopuf takes the fancy of another, and their snouts curl around each other. "Heeey! No smoochin on ze jooob...!" the Hypello chauffeur protests haplessly. As this heartwarming scene goes on, the Magic Pot rescinds and serves your next course. As if detecting love in the air, what comes out next is a heart-shaped platter of various slices of -berry, including black-, rasp-, cran-, straw-, boysen-, and even girlsen, garnished with a light sprinkling of caster sugar and decorated with perilla leaves. ... Let's hope there's no ton- in there. =Dungeon Conditions: Wonder===================================================
<Pose Tracker> Tabitha deVriese has posed.
The fact Loren tries so incredibly hard not to look is possibly more entertaining than if he did, which of course is why she does these things.
After her initial foray, Tabitha quickly figures out the trick and cheerfully slurps up her appetizers with nary a spatter of sauces.
She settles back, holding up her stump at Fei and waving it like it had a hand on it. "Ah, hello Mr. Fong Wong," she chimes, with a pleasant smile. "So good to see you in high spirits. Why yes, certainly, that's one way to read it. Or, you could say that they aren't afraid to offer cuisine that is somewhat physically challenging due to their difficult lifestyles, which require--"
She is distracted by Shoopuf romance. "Ahhh! Love in the wild! How darling!" she sighs. And the Magic Pot is also on brand, with such a lovely platter of heart-shaped delicacies!
Tabitha reaches over with one hand and taps one and it floats very slowly toward her face. A knife sneaks out from behind one of the pies and slams into the platter shortly after. "Ah, I believe that one is yours, Thomas," she chimes, and doesn't help.
DG: Tabitha deVriese has contributed a Agility Basic Action toward her party's challenge, The Over-ton Window.
<Pose Tracker> Fei Fong Wong has posed.
"Um." Fei says. "I just wanted to eat delicious food. And ride the shoopuf."
He lowers his head. "...I like riding the shoopuf." His DESTROYED tofu is taken away from him and he looks after it mournfully. He really wanted to give it a chance...
<Pose Tracker> Fei Fong Wong has posed.
"Um." Fei says. "I just wanted to eat delicious food. And ride the shoopuf."
He lowers his head. "...I like riding the shoopuf." His DESTROYED tofu is taken away from him and he looks after it mournfully. He really wanted to give it a chance...
Tabitha accuses him of high spirits, which seems to confuse Fei. "I am?" He doesn't have anywhere near the guile to realize that Tabitha might be... sassy. Or giving him shit. Because gee I wonder why.
"Um the last time we were here, we just got a bunch of deserts so I was wondering, uh, what the actual...course items were like. I'm not sure trusting serving to a magical pot is a good idea oh but I don't want to offend the magical pot..."
He is distracted by two shoopufs smooching. His mouth opens up faintly and he says, "awwwww....." He says. "That's so sweet."
He tries to collect some treats himself but like stealthily so he doesn't draw any more attention to himself.
"Um.....!!!"
How do you politely tell someone you're glad they didn't get themselves killed in a rage fueled haze?
Fei squints in deep thought.
DG: Fei Fong Wong has contributed a Agility Basic Action toward his party's challenge, The Over-ton Window.
<Pose Tracker> Loren Voss has posed.
"Why did you have to be on this one," Loren mutters, casting Fei a glance that might be the equivalent of a handful of daggers.
But Tabitha's the only one here who has managed to even get a taste of the appetizer course. Perhaps a little bit defeated, Loren's shoulders slouch.
The cabin jostles as a shoopuf meets a shoopuf and-- can love bloom on the battlefield? ...Or the river, in this case.
Loren leans to take a look out the window. "Huh," he says, watching the two of the creatures for a moment. Then he just sighs and settles back in his seat, his expression pensive.
...It just figures that the next round is an arrangement of fruit... pies?
"Great. Even a weird magic pot has a romantic streak," he sighs.
This is the point where a knife sneaks out from one of the pies and slams into the platter. Loren just about jumps through the ceiling in response.
"What the-- what did that? ...how?"
It's just a pie, from what he can tell. With trepidation, he (after fiddling with the loop around his wrist) reaches for the malevolent (lowercase m) pie...
In a sense, Lan's plan is working in one way. So aggrieved, Loren can't possibly dwell on darker possibilities or, indeed, his gap-ridden memory.
DG: Loren Voss has used his Tool Ether Tuner toward his party's challenge, The Over-ton Window.
============================<* Ride ze Shoopuf *>============================= ====================<* CHALLENGE - The Over-ton Window *>===================== |Type: Exploration |Dungeon Ability: Agility |Challenge Rating: 1 | --------------------------< Challenge Information: >-------------------------- As a two-way service, you sometimes encounter other Shoopufs headed the way you came from. The ride stops for a moment as your Shoopuf takes the fancy of another, and their snouts curl around each other. "Heeey! No smoochin on ze jooob...!" the Hypello chauffeur protests haplessly. As this heartwarming scene goes on, the Magic Pot rescinds and serves your next course. As if detecting love in the air, what comes out next is a heart-shaped platter of various slices of -berry, including black-, rasp-, cran-, straw-, boysen-, and even girlsen, garnished with a light sprinkling of caster sugar and decorated with perilla leaves. ... Let's hope there's no ton- in there. =Dungeon Conditions: Wonder===================================================
=======================<* Ride ze Shoopuf - Round 2 *>======================== ======================< Results - The Over-ton Window >======================= Player Exhaustion Pass/Fail ------------------------------------------------------------------------------ Loren Voss 20 --(20)--> 40 Fail Ether Tuner 1 Agility Effects: Quicken and Rally ------------------------------------------------------------------------------ Fei Fong Wong 20 --(20)--> 40 Fail Rush 0 Agility Effects: BASIC ------------------------------------------------------------------------------ Tabitha deVriese 15 --(15)--> 30 Pass Rush 0 Agility Effects: BASIC ----------------------------------< Party >----------------------------------- Leader: Loren Voss 10 --(10)--> 20 Fail Conditions: Slow(1)|Wonder Effects: Quicken(1) ==============================< Dream Chasers >===============================
DG: The party led by Loren Voss has failed this challenge! The party gained 10 exploration! If anyone needs to use party management commands, do so now. Otherwise, the next round's GM may begin the next round with +dungeon/draw. DG: Fei Fong Wong has drawn a new Challenge.
============================<* Ride ze Shoopuf *>============================= ===============<* CHALLENGE - Flan-tasmagoria of Flower View *>=============== |Type: Exploration |Dungeon Ability: Combat |Challenge Rating: 1 | --------------------------< Challenge Information: >-------------------------- A thunderous roar in the far distance indicates a common sight in Spira -- mages, battling a common foe that most warriors struggle with: Flans. The Magic Pot takes in the sorcerous sighting and retracts, revealing... Red Mousse Yellow Jelly Purple Bavarois Golden Custard Chocolate Flan Blue Pudding Green Cream White Tembleque Indigo Sponge So what was it again... Fire and Ice beat each other, Thunder and Water form a pair, and Purple is weak to... ... ... Chocolate ... or did it reflect it or ... ???? =Dungeon Conditions: Suffer===================================================
<Pose Tracker> Tabitha deVriese has posed.
"Well, your spirit's still inside you, at least," Tabitha says, idly, and chews on her little pie.
Fei and Loren seek pies of their own! But, toddling out from behind one of the pies comes a dread creature, a beast of true fear...
A little serving doll of a tonberry. It brandishes a spatula protectively of its role.
Eventually, Loren and Fei get away with a few slices of pie for their trouble. And, also, several small abrasions from overly aggressive pie management.
"It's so cute!" Tabitha cheers.
<Pose Tracker> Fei Fong Wong has posed.
"...Man I don't remember food being this difficult," Fei complains. The tonberry doll managed to slap Fei's hand several times with that spatula of his because rest assured as far as KARMA and Everybody's Grudge goes, yeah Fei is going to have a rough time of that. His hand is frankly swollen from Tonberry slaps but att least he has pie.
He noms a bit on pie.
After this--mages! In the distance! Battling flans!
But let's be totally real here, you're interested in the food and Fei's player isn't going to try and get all the ansi right.
"Um... hold up everyone. We gotta eat these in the right order for maximum, uh, deliciousness."
He studies the various flans and draws out his RPS Badge to remind him of the concept of weakness chains...
And then he gets work, eating flan after flan after flan.
"They just put me on this one, you know," He asides in a mumble to Loren. "You can complain to the guide later if you want."
He's kind of pouting now. It's not like he's trying to be Loren's friend, really, but he isn't really trying to be his enemy either.
He looks towards Tabitha. Maybe his pout will have better luck there??
DG: Fei Fong Wong has used his Tool RPS Badge toward his party's challenge, Flan-tasmagoria of Flower View.
<Pose Tracker> Loren Voss has posed.
Let it be known: Loren really likes food. But when it comes to food that, uh, fights back...?
Or at least, has a guardian. If it has a guardian, it's an entirely different story. He doesn't come away from this turmoil with no fruit, but he certainly does only come away with any fruit at all at great cost.
He nurses his right hand.
...Mostly the wound is to his pride.
He eats the fruit, circling in on himself in his seat.
Which-- when the next round is presented--
"What do you mean 'in the right order'," he snaps, eyeing the flans on the table. "They're desserts, not some..."
Did that blue one just wriggle?
Or is he seeing things again? ...granted, it's not the right shade of blue.
"..."
Loren fishes in his bag a moment before bringing out an... huh. A Remedy?
This he douses on the blue one until it stops moving (to his eyes at least).
"...Whatever," is his remark to Fei before he scowls and... hesitating, grabs the offending blue one. He might as well make sure it's... done for. It's consumed in a single gulp--?!
DG: Loren Voss has used his Tool Solarian Medical Kit toward his party's challenge, Flan-tasmagoria of Flower View.
<Pose Tracker> Tabitha deVriese has posed.
Fei turns a big pout on Tabitha. Tabitha makes a big show of luxuriously setting her front two fingers to her plush lips, kissing them fully, and then blowing that kiss completely past Fei and out the window.
"Goodness," she says, immediately changing the subject. "So many sweets! I shouldn't, you know, they all go to my -" She coughs, daintily, as if that were somehow not a completely intentional direction she took that in. She examines the creations briefly. "Though... ...I wonder what flavor green is. Grass....?"
She claims it for her own. Time for everyone's favorite game show: LIME, OR, DEATH?
DG: Tabitha deVriese has contributed a Combat Basic Action toward her party's challenge, Flan-tasmagoria of Flower View.
============================<* Ride ze Shoopuf *>============================= ===============<* CHALLENGE - Flan-tasmagoria of Flower View *>=============== |Type: Exploration |Dungeon Ability: Combat |Challenge Rating: 1 | --------------------------< Challenge Information: >-------------------------- A thunderous roar in the far distance indicates a common sight in Spira -- mages, battling a common foe that most warriors struggle with: Flans. The Magic Pot takes in the sorcerous sighting and retracts, revealing... Red Mousse Yellow Jelly Purple Bavarois Golden Custard Chocolate Flan Blue Pudding Green Cream White Tembleque Indigo Sponge So what was it again... Fire and Ice beat each other, Thunder and Water form a pair, and Purple is weak to... ... ... Chocolate ... or did it reflect it or ... ???? =Dungeon Conditions: Suffer===================================================
=======================<* Ride ze Shoopuf - Round 3 *>======================== =================< Results - Flan-tasmagoria of Flower View >================= Player Exhaustion Pass/Fail ------------------------------------------------------------------------------ Loren Voss 40 --(0)--> 40 Pass Solarian Medical Kit 1 Combat Effects: Cleanse ------------------------------------------------------------------------------ Fei Fong Wong 40 --(0)--> 40 Pass RPS Badge 3 Combat Effects: Rally ------------------------------------------------------------------------------ Tabitha deVriese 30 --(0)--> 30 Pass Fight 0 Combat Effects: BASIC ----------------------------------< Party >----------------------------------- Leader: Loren Voss 20 --(20)--> 40 Pass Conditions: Suffer(1)|Wonder Effects: Cleanse ==============================< Dream Chasers >===============================
DG: The party led by Loren Voss has passed this challenge! The party gained 20 exploration! If anyone needs to use party management commands, do so now. Otherwise, the next round's GM may begin the next round with +dungeon/draw.
<Pose Tracker> Fei Fong Wong has posed.
Luckily it seems when it come to basically eating soft pudding, this particular party can at least stomach that much. Sure, maybe not much else, but at least they can eat flan!
It turns out that green IS Lime! And Blue is...Blue Raspberry? It's all very (finally) delicious.
FEI'S POUTS SEEM INEFFECTIVE THOUGH.
He hangs his head, despair, knowing that kiss was specifically aimed to fly past him.
"At least the food is good," He mumbles.
DG: Loren Voss has drawn a new Challenge.
=============================<* Ride ze Shoopuf *>============================== ==============<* CHALLENGE - Dropping an Egg On Me is Cheating *>=============== |Type: Exploration |Dungeon Ability: Combat |Challenge Rating: 3 | ---------------------------< Challenge Information: >--------------------------- The journey across the Moonflow takes you to the centre of a sunken city. Once, it is said, these ancient cities stood proud above the waters of the ancient river. But the hubris of conquering water itself brought disaster upon its residents, and now the remnants of their work remain seen crystal-clear... And as if to regard fallen dynasties and those that would wrest them back, the Magic Pot reacts. "The Bartichoke Omelette. Rough and scraggly on the outside, but with a soft, fluffy interior. With a penchant for ballistics. Yet..." ... whatever the chef may be writing on about, you see a rough-hewn omelette dish with a curious patch of nori seaweed designed in the shape of an eyepatch arrives. The gilded colour of the egg is twirled into a braid at one end. And when you cut inside the omelette, you find a medley of fluffy soft egg and the hearts of artichokes, as well as stalks upon stalks of asparagus, whose shape... remind you of... missiles, for some reason. Lots and lots of Bart Mis-- No mercy. Have at it. =Dungeon Conditions: Treasure, Maim===========================================
<Pose Tracker> Loren Voss has posed.
The good news is that it tastes of blueberry and not, say, something not of this world. Or for that matter wriggle as it goes down. In fact, all the flans he tastes are pretty good.
...Is this one chocolate?
There may be a few moments of bliss, here. After all, it's real, actual chocolate.
Whereupon the remnants are taken away and the next course is presented before them.
Loren takes this gap before the dish is unveiled to glance over at Fei -- the non-recipient of Tabitha's blown kiss moments before -- and regard him with a similar intensity that he will go on to regard Elly with in due time at a certain party to come. "Let me guess. She's also still alive--"
And then the dish is presented before this highly awkward dinner party of three, and the subject flies from Loren's mind.
He stares at the omelet. He stares at it for a long time.
"Are you kidding me," is his comment at length. His expression darkens dramatically.
One hand digs deep into his bag. Out comes a single silvery item, glinting in the light--
Oh. It's a scalpel. Wait--
--You're not supposed to eat with those right?! ...right?
DG: Loren Voss has used his Tool Solarian Medical Kit toward his party's challenge, Dropping an Egg On Me is Cheating.
<Pose Tracker> Fei Fong Wong has posed.
Fei says, "Aww, what a cute omelette--"
Loren speaks to him and Fei looks over to him, wincing. "Uh." He guesses that Elly's still alive. "No? She...died? Totally? Yeah. Uh. Totally dead. So you don't have to, uh, try to kill her again."
He trails off and then hangs his head. "...Yeah, nobody's going to buy that one, Fei."
He shakes his head. "I guess...you're not really going to, uh, stop trying then...?" He frowns.
Kill them now. Or they'll kill her
Fei shakes his head at that voice. "We just want to live a boring life. I don't get why that's such a--" He pauses for a moment, noticing sometheing about the omellete.
Bart...Missiles...
"No mercy," He scowls as he stabs a fork into them.
He's kind of shaking. Like he's having some terrible memory resurface.
Terrible memories.
Bart makes choices okay.
DG: Fei Fong Wong has used his Tool RPS Badge toward his party's challenge, Dropping an Egg On Me is Cheating.
<Pose Tracker> Tabitha deVriese has posed.
Tabitha has somewhat tuned out from Fei and Loren, mostly because if she fully processed the implications of Elly being alive this would turn into a different scene very, very suddenly. She is looking outside at the wonders below, instead. "Goodness," she murmurs. "It's incredible! I hadn't really thought about the implications of the size of the river before. A flooded valley, perhaps...? Oh - no, I think that guide mentioned it used to float?" ... "Or to try the omelettes, I can't quite tell with the accent."
The Magic Pot produces just such an object, and Tabitha smiles delightedly. "Ah! What excellent timing," she decides, and reaches to DESTROY THE NONBELIEVER.
DG: Tabitha deVriese has contributed a Combat Basic Action toward her party's challenge, Dropping an Egg On Me is Cheating.
=============================<* Ride ze Shoopuf *>============================== ==============<* CHALLENGE - Dropping an Egg On Me is Cheating *>=============== |Type: Exploration |Dungeon Ability: Combat |Challenge Rating: 3 | ---------------------------< Challenge Information: >--------------------------- The journey across the Moonflow takes you to the centre of a sunken city. Once, it is said, these ancient cities stood proud above the waters of the ancient river. But the hubris of conquering water itself brought disaster upon its residents, and now the remnants of their work remain seen crystal-clear... And as if to regard fallen dynasties and those that would wrest them back, the Magic Pot reacts. "The Bartichoke Omelette. Rough and scraggly on the outside, but with a soft, fluffy interior. With a penchant for ballistics. Yet..." ... whatever the chef may be writing on about, you see a rough-hewn omelette dish with a curious patch of nori seaweed designed in the shape of an eyepatch arrives. The gilded colour of the egg is twirled into a braid at one end. And when you cut inside the omelette, you find a medley of fluffy soft egg and the hearts of artichokes, as well as stalks upon stalks of asparagus, whose shape... remind you of... missiles, for some reason. Lots and lots of Bart Mis-- No mercy. Have at it. =Dungeon Conditions: Treasure, Maim===========================================
========================<* Ride ze Shoopuf - Round 4 *>========================= ================< Results - Dropping an Egg On Me is Cheating >================= Player Exhaustion Pass/Fail -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Loren Voss 40 --(20)--> 60 Fail Solarian Medical Kit 1 Combat Effects: Cleanse -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Fei Fong Wong 40 --(15)--> 55 Pass RPS Badge 3 Combat Effects: Rally -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Tabitha deVriese 30 --(20)--> 50 Fail Fight 0 Combat Effects: BASIC -----------------------------------< Party >------------------------------------ Leader: Loren Voss 40 --(10)--> 50 Fail Conditions: Maim|Treasure(1)|Wonder Effects: Cleanse ===============================< Dream Chasers >================================
DG: The party led by Loren Voss has failed this challenge! The party gained 10 exploration! If anyone needs to use party management commands, do so now. Otherwise, the next round's GM may begin the next round with +dungeon/draw.
<Pose Tracker> Loren Voss has posed.
Loren just stares at Fei, as the young man claims that Elly died back then. He stares at him in a most withering fashion. "Do you," he says at last to Fei, "think that I am stupid?" His grip on the scalpel tightens, as if to underscore his own fury. "This reprieve is only temporary. She is dead if I see her again."
His hand slips then and the scalpel cracks against the plate beneath the omelette. With force, in fact: the blade snaps. Loren draws it out and with a 'tch' slips it back into his bag, scowling.
Tragically, Tabitha's efforts are similarly to little avail against the eggy dish: the egg is airy and impenetrable. The asparagus is fierce and in multitudes.
...Perhaps it is fitting that in the end, only Fei is able to best the Omelette of the Desert.
(It's a shame, because it truly is the lightest and fluffiest of omelettes (if barely concealing a wild side within).)
DG: Tabitha deVriese has drawn a new Challenge.
============================<* Ride ze Shoopuf *>============================= =====================<* CHALLENGE - Ether Pleeease...! *>===================== |Type: Exploration |Dungeon Ability: Wits |Challenge Rating: 3 | --------------------------< Challenge Information: >-------------------------- Arriving at a nearby brook from whence a spring must originate, your Shoopuf stops to take a drink from crystal-clear waters that flow into the Moonflow itself. Just as it might be nice to take a break from food and have a drink yourself... there's a little fizzle and a cloud-puff erupts from your Magic Pot. Oh no, it looks like the Magic Pot isn't doing so well. A malfunction? "Ether pleeease..." Oh no, it looks like even your serving device is in need of drink! An Ether is commonly sourced enough, being a staple of Drifters and adventurers in Spira both to restore magical resources, but... Where exactly does one deposit the contents of said Ether from? =Dungeon Conditions: Save Point, Treasure=====================================
<Pose Tracker> Tabitha deVriese has posed.
Tabitha is defeated by an unworthy opponent. This is not new, but it doesn't make it less annoying.
She scowls as the omelet escapes with the power of Hypelo engineering and/or waitstaff, and then sighs and hurls a breath at the ceiling, leaning back and hoping to fluster somebody with her cleavage for a cheap laugh or something. She gazes out across the Moonflow, watching the Shoopuf pause. "Ah, even the big guys need a little drink on the job sometimes, hm? What marvelous creatures. Suppose there must be farms? Where would you put them, though..."
The Magic Pot coughs, then. Tabitha looks over with a blink.
"Ether pleeeeease....."
Tabitha blinks again. She looks around, but none of the staff appear to be paying attention. Hm. "Suppose I could charge them for it later," she muses. "But where do you --"
"Ah. I see."
She reaches into her bag, shuffling around with her good hand, and finally levitates a book out of it. She flips it open once it's at eye level, holding it crooked in her hand.
It's a....pocket bible....?
"And wheresoever the Lord may take thee," she murmurs, "Remember in all things that intake and outflow be of the same system, one and holy in the eyes of Granas."
She purses her lips. "Well I knew that!" she snaps at the sky.
DG: Tabitha deVriese has used her Tool Gospel of Granasi toward her party's challenge, Ether Pleeease...!.
<Pose Tracker> Loren Voss has posed.
Even food can overcome him. Loren slumps in his seat, left alone with his thoughts in the quiet moment now between courses, his gaze up at the ceiling.
Sometimes he wonders just what the point--
Fortunately, his brooding is quietly interrupted by the Magic Pot. Which requests An Ether.
Please.
"Is it... broken?" Loren ventures, squinting now at the pot which repeats its request. He looks over at Tabitha.
He even looks over at Fei, as if he were in search of a clearer sort of answer from... one of them.
There isn't likely to be one.
"Or... is it sick?" They said it was a 'tame Fiend' (he's dubious about that) but can a Fiend fall ill?
With trepidation he draws the small scanning computer out of his bag and points it at the pot.
"..."
Text scrolls across the tiny screen, one character at a time:
>greetings and welcome to MediScan v7!
>what would you like to do today?
>you have selected 'vital scan'. please direct me at the patient and wait.
>scanning in progress... .... .....
"...I wonder what a Fiend's vitals are like."
DG: Loren Voss has used his Tool MediScan v7 toward his party's challenge, Ether Pleeease...!.
<Pose Tracker> Fei Fong Wong has posed.
AN UNWORTHY OPPONENT.
"Is that a bible," Fei says, groaning as Loren threatens to kill Elly again. Why does everybody want to kill Elly that much. Is he the idiot? Is she secretly super annoying to everybody but him?? He doesn't get it and he certainly doesn't want to get TABITHA in on it too. Enough people want to kill Elly! Ugh! Isn't there enoughg murders?? Fei should know!
The Magic Pot begs for an ether. As it so happens, Fei happens to have one! He reaches into his bag and just kind of... pours the ether intto the creature's jaw. Hopefully that's how it's supposed to work?
"I think it might just need a refill every once in a while to keep it going." Fei says. "It just tries to express this....adorably?"
Despite all the HATE AND RAGE it's kind of weird but nice talking to Loren about how to treat an adorable pot for illness.
DG: Fei Fong Wong has used his Tool Artist's Toolkit toward his party's challenge, Ether Pleeease...!.
============================<* Ride ze Shoopuf *>============================= =====================<* CHALLENGE - Ether Pleeease...! *>===================== |Type: Exploration |Dungeon Ability: Wits |Challenge Rating: 3 | --------------------------< Challenge Information: >-------------------------- Arriving at a nearby brook from whence a spring must originate, your Shoopuf stops to take a drink from crystal-clear waters that flow into the Moonflow itself. Just as it might be nice to take a break from food and have a drink yourself... there's a little fizzle and a cloud-puff erupts from your Magic Pot. Oh no, it looks like the Magic Pot isn't doing so well. A malfunction? "Ether pleeease..." Oh no, it looks like even your serving device is in need of drink! An Ether is commonly sourced enough, being a staple of Drifters and adventurers in Spira both to restore magical resources, but... Where exactly does one deposit the contents of said Ether from? =Dungeon Conditions: Save Point, Treasure=====================================
=======================<* Ride ze Shoopuf - Round 5 *>======================== =======================< Results - Ether Pleeease...! >======================= Player Exhaustion Pass/Fail ------------------------------------------------------------------------------ Loren Voss 60 --(0)--> 60 Pass MediScan v7 3 Wits Effects: Enlighten and Efficie ------------------------------------------------------------------------------ Fei Fong Wong 55 --(5)--> 60 Fail Artist's Toolkit 2 Wits Effects: Enlighten ------------------------------------------------------------------------------ Tabitha deVriese 50 --(0)--> 50 Pass Gospel of Granasi 2 Wits Effects: Enlighten ----------------------------------< Party >----------------------------------- Leader: Loren Voss 50 --(25)--> 75 Pass Conditions: Save Point(1)|Treasure(1)|Wonder Effects: Enlighten(1) ==============================< Dream Chasers >===============================
DG: The party led by Loren Voss has passed this challenge! The party gained 25 exploration! If anyone needs to use party management commands, do so now. Otherwise, the next round's GM may begin the next round with +dungeon/draw. DG: Fei Fong Wong has drawn a new Challenge.
============================<* Ride ze Shoopuf *>============================= ================<* CHALLENGE - A Berry Berry Special Course *>================ |Type: Final |Dungeon Ability: Combat |Challenge Rating: 2 | --------------------------< Challenge Information: >-------------------------- Your journey upon the back of the Shoopuf is coming to its end, and so is the Degustation Course as you spot the waystation on the other end of the Moonflow's banks. The sun is cozily setting to a gentle golden gleam in the distance. A dessert would truly be perfect to finish the entire meal off, before you go. And to that end, the Magic Pot retracts one final time and... A lantern lifts from within the pot. The lantern unfurls into four plates on each side, upon which a ton of berry delicious-looking water crackers in the shape of little chef's knives unfurl, served with a ton of berry compote in little lantern-bowls. A veritable platter of sliced kiwifruit and feijoa give the entire platter a beauteous green colour. Two little flat candles are placed in the middle, as if providing the appearance of eyes... ... ( o o ) ... but that's just a coinky-doink, isn't it? Yeah..... that must be it. =Dungeon Conditions: Madness==================================================
<Pose Tracker> Tabitha deVriese has posed.
"Yes," Tabitha replies, and claps it shut. "Specifically, the Holy Gospel of Our Lord, According to Saint Granasi, No Relation." She tucks the book away again. "It is a very educational text! I'd say you should read it but I don't want you to get hurt touching a holy object."
She crosses her arms at some length. "Anyway yes probably just put it in its mouth."
Loren's scanning computer helpfully diagnoses the Magic Pot with stage 3 ^@!#(*@k. Then beeps and adjusts that to 'mild hunger.'
The Magic Pot burbles happily as Fei pours the ether in, and spits it all back out into his face, where the stream, through the power of anime logic, ricochets off his face and arcs gracefully into the Magic Pot's now-open lidded top.
"Ah," Tabitha says. "So close!"
<Pose Tracker> Fei Fong Wong has posed.
Fei's gift is literally spit back into his own face with enough force that it spills back into the magic pot.
Drippingly, Fei stares into the distance.
'Oh thank god the ride is ending', Fei thinks as the shoopuf nears the end of its travels. Look just because medicating a pot is charming doesn't mean he wants to endure any more mean looks and misaimed air smooches than he already has! EVen shoopuf smooches aren't enough to save this day.
But there's one last course! And it's a dessert! Yum! And it's... a ... Ton-Berry dish.
Fei reaches for one of the wafers and then--
Fei looks into those candles.
He stares into the candles.
The dessert.... The Ton-Berry...
IT CAN SEE HIS SINS.
Fei scootches back a bit and says, "Ahahah--um... I think I'll pass on this. Think I'm feeling full already."
...Coward...
DG: Fei Fong Wong has contributed a Combat Basic Action toward his party's challenge, A Berry Berry Special Course.
<Pose Tracker> Loren Voss has posed.
Loren squints at the screen for a good long moment or five. Then:
"It's... hungry?"
Pause.
"...Yeah, sure. Just pour it in."
It works. Eventually. Tucking the computer away (after powering it down) Loren settles back into his seat.
The pot then obligingly produces the next course.
Loren stares at it.
Loren stares at it for a good long time.
It's... like he's getting judged. By dessert. "Ugh," he vocalizes, staring at it still, as if it might back down if he glowered at it long enough. I know. I'm a disgrace. But--
You're just a plate of berries and crackers...
Maybe he really is losing it.
This is when Fei says he's going to pass. And this, Loren quickly finds, is a bit of a turning point for himself. "Fine," he says to Fei. If he's not having any, then that just means that he...
...definitely is? But that stare from the platter is still bothering him.
He fishes around in his kit somewhat blindly and comes up with a single glass vial which he opens depositing a...
A single reddish-gold feather drifts slowly down upon the pile of fruit. Loren regards it somberly.
And squints at it once it lands and nothing in particular seems to happen when the Phoenix Down touches the plate.
"I still don't know what these are supposed to do," he says, before finally reaching out to take some crackers.
DG: Loren Voss has used his Tool Solarian Medical Kit toward his party's challenge, A Berry Berry Special Course.
<Pose Tracker> Tabitha deVriese has posed.
Tabitha fails to insult Fei by implying he'd hurt himself touching a bible. Too obvious, she wonders? Yes, probably too obvious. Even a Lamb can ignore a petty jab. She'll have to up her game somehow. Perhaps she can borrow one of those charming Al Bhed robots and drop it on his tent later.
Oh, the new meal's up. "Ah, he's feeling better! Isn't that precious?"
The fact that this is the second attempt by the magic pot to kill Fei with a Tonberry on this trip has not gone unnoticed, though Tabitha couldn't fathom what he has to be worried about with his hand destroying antics.
Tabitha, as a blessed servant of the Lord Granas, fears nothing, least of all some weird knife goblin from another planet. She regards the dish and does her level best to ignore the way her stomach turns when she notices the 'eyes'.
Probably....probably nothing.
Loren blesses the meal with a Phoenix Down, which is...fresh. Sure. "Ah, Thomas, are you the type for a bit of flame in your meal? I will be sure to remember that," she says, and picks up a cracker.
DG: Tabitha deVriese has contributed a Combat Basic Action toward her party's challenge, A Berry Berry Special Course.
============================<* Ride ze Shoopuf *>============================= ================<* CHALLENGE - A Berry Berry Special Course *>================ |Type: Final |Dungeon Ability: Combat |Challenge Rating: 2 | --------------------------< Challenge Information: >-------------------------- Your journey upon the back of the Shoopuf is coming to its end, and so is the Degustation Course as you spot the waystation on the other end of the Moonflow's banks. The sun is cozily setting to a gentle golden gleam in the distance. A dessert would truly be perfect to finish the entire meal off, before you go. And to that end, the Magic Pot retracts one final time and... A lantern lifts from within the pot. The lantern unfurls into four plates on each side, upon which a ton of berry delicious-looking water crackers in the shape of little chef's knives unfurl, served with a ton of berry compote in little lantern-bowls. A veritable platter of sliced kiwifruit and feijoa give the entire platter a beauteous green colour. Two little flat candles are placed in the middle, as if providing the appearance of eyes... ... ( o o ) ... but that's just a coinky-doink, isn't it? Yeah..... that must be it. =Dungeon Conditions: Madness==================================================
=======================<* Ride ze Shoopuf - Round 6 *>======================== ==================< Results - A Berry Berry Special Course >================== Player Exhaustion Pass/Fail ------------------------------------------------------------------------------ Loren Voss 60 --(100)--> 160 Pass Solarian Medical Kit 1 Combat Effects: Cleanse ------------------------------------------------------------------------------ Fei Fong Wong 60 --(100)--> 160 Fail Fight 0 Combat Effects: BASIC ------------------------------------------------------------------------------ Tabitha deVriese 50 --(100)--> 150 Fail Fight 0 Combat Effects: BASIC ----------------------------------< Party >----------------------------------- Leader: Loren Voss 75 --(10)--> 85 Fail Conditions: Madness|Wonder Effects: Cleanse ==============================< Dream Chasers >===============================
DG: Loren Voss is too exhausted to continue! DG: Fei Fong Wong is too exhausted to continue! DG: Tabitha deVriese is too exhausted to continue! DG: The party has failed this challenge! All party members are now Exhausted. This attempt is over. DG: The party led by Loren Voss has been fully Exhausted by Ride ze Shoopuf! DG: The party will now draw a conclusion.
============================<* Ride ze Shoopuf *>============================= =====================<* CHALLENGE - Now We Are Friends *>===================== |Type: Landmark |Dungeon Ability: Conclusion|Challenge Rating: 1 | --------------------------< Challenge Information: >-------------------------- The service bell rings. "Most esteemed guestz... we have arrived at the other shore of the Moonflow!" Ah, perfect timing. As you finish with the rest of your meal on the Degustation Course, the Shoopuf pulls up to the waystation on the other side of the shore. It's time to find accommodation for the night or continue your journey onward, depending on what plans and destinies are in store for you. One certainly could do much worse than that day of rest and relaxation before the demands of adventure call once more. But before you leave... An attendee walks up to your group and bows, offering a little box with a wonderful friendship bracelet in the shape of a shoopuf snout. "Please, have this souvenir, if you would like! A commemoration of your journey aboard our Shoopufs..." It's a bracelet to commemorate the friendship between you... and shoopuf. You wouldn't shoo that away, would you? =Dungeon Conditions: Treasure=================================================
<Pose Tracker> Fei Fong Wong has posed.
To be fair to Fei, he was getting literally spat on by a Magic Pot. Also his player is tired. Also, let's be real here, Fei would not be surprised if a holy object burned him. He is particularly irreligious despite holding onto that Nisan Cross and even as part of him is raging at all this treatment, the stronger part of him (at the moment) would rather just let them talk their shit rather than have another fight with these people.
The fact they outnumber him is part of that calculation but also he's just frankly tired of the petty fights. There's going to be plenty of life or death struggles without him adding to the mix because someone said a meanie thing to him.
Loren adds a feather to the Tonberry Plate. It's uncertain this accomplishes anything but Fei certainly is determined to not eat that (it's probably poison, Fei thinks) or assault a Ton-Berry. HE HAS SINNED ENOUGH.
That being said, crushing him underneath a robot probably WOULD rile Fei up. Also possibly murder him. Win Win?
And it really is kind of just plain depressing that Fei is kind of, mentally, a wimp at times. Like, imagine what his power could do in the hands of someone WITHOUT mental problems? Probably something impressive!
Still, they are able to chow ddown a bit on the Tonberry and the Phoenix Down does weirdly...help? But they don't get anywhere near done before the Shoopuf Journey ends.
The shoopuf pulls up to the waystation and Fei quickly steps down, red in the face to try and avoid conflict but--
--an attendant stops him.
"Please, have this souvenir, if you would like! A commemoration of your journey aboard our SHoopufs!"
And he hands Fei, (and Loren, and Tabitha) a little box. And inside that little box, is a shoopuf snout bracelet.
Fei stares at this.
*** INTERNAL SCREAMING ***
<Pose Tracker> Loren Voss has posed.
The crackers, as it happens, are delicious. So is the fruit.
But there is so, so very much of it. Even the feather can only do so much.
It's a saving grace for Loren that he's not actually eating at the time that Tabitha makes that comment. He flushes (is it meant to be suggestive? was it actually suggestive?) but avers, "I don't know what you're talking about," to his colleague, before stuffing a few more crackers into his mouth, his attention very much on the prize of...
...of eating food, perhaps.
But even so, they don't finish, and eventually the shoopuf reaches its destination. Loren lingers, perhaps simply because Fei has walked off first.
But eventually a departure becomes impossible to delay, and he steps off, refusing to meet either Fei or (especially) Tabitha's eyes.
This is when he is presented with a little box.
Inside the box is a little bracelet. It's a weird-looking one. He pokes at it.
"What is this?"
"This is a friendship bracelet! Think of it as a bond between you and the shoopuf. Or your friends!"
Loren looks at Tabitha at last and then at Fei.
He looks back down at the bracelet.
*** INTERNAL SCREAMING ***
<Pose Tracker> Tabitha deVriese has posed.
Loren pauses in that very tiny way Loren does when Tabitha scores a direct hit on him and she finds herself smiling the entire rest of the trip, sinless and guiltless as the day she was born.
Then she bites a cracker wrong and it digs into the roof of her mouth. "ah shit," she curses.
She survives this ordeal, as she has so many others; and will again, for Lord Granas and also the Emperor, Supreme and Ultimate, Lord of All Things, Judge of All Men, are with her always.
And because her dad would probably resurrect her corpse, and then she wouldn't be hot anymore probably.
In the end, they do finally depart, and Tabitha stretches as she stands, arms reaching high above her to raise up her chest because no number of grudges will change that about her. She follows the both of them off, smiling possibly specifcially because they are not. Then, an attendant approaches, and gently presents to them a set of boxes. A friendship bracelet, the attendant says.
Tabitha slips it open. She looks from it, to Loren, then to Fei.
She is smiling like she ate an entire canary. "It's wonderful!" she declares.