2020-04-18: An Education
- Log: An Education
- Cast: Loren Voss, Lily Keil
- Where: Sword Cathedral
- Date: April 18, 2020
- Summary: As agreed, Loren presents Lily with an education of a sort in controling Ether. But, is this really just for everyone's mutual benefit...?
<Pose Tracker> Loren Voss has posed.
"No, no, no, no," Loren groans, rubbing at his temples with both hands. "What are you even doing? You're using too much force."
Jugend-style Ether education is going just fine.
Fortunately, they're both out here in the open, with nothing around for miles (other than the grass, the trees, the occasional monster, a stray sheep maybe, and so on). Even the Sword Cathedral is nothing but a distant backdrop to the events currently underway, which to date features Loren sitting crosslegged in the middle of the field (and trying not to think about all the bugs) getting increasingly irritated and Lily doing her thing.
"Look. Try it again. Rough movements are fine in the middle of combat, but if you're going to mend someone's wounds like that, you're going to do a lot more harm than good." He pauses, as if considering it himself. "Unless you like adhering the spleen to the stomach, anyway."
<Pose Tracker> Lily Keil has posed.
"What are you talking about?" Lily answers with a scowl, shaking her head as she takes back her hand from where she'd been working to demonstrate. Ether education...
Well nothing big has exploded, anyway. There is that. That may be in part because very little is actually here, except for them.
Lily is seated similarly, facing, demonstrating something, or was. Now, instead... "That doesn't make any sense," Lily says. "If you don't use enough force you can't overcome the body's inertia." This particular subject is indeed a difficult one; Lily's magic heals using fire, not water, and trying to apply her ice abilities here is difficult. "Ice naturally requires structure to build on itself. Trying to keep this essence fluid is..." She sets her jaw. "All right. I'll go slower."
<Pose Tracker> Loren Voss has posed.
It's his turn to look at her as if she sprouted a second head. "What are you talking about? You don't overcome the body -- you're healing wounds, not breaking bones," Loren shakes his head, as if in disbelief.
Technically speaking, his healing magic doesn't run on water either -- which may be somewhat more unusual among the Jugend-taught, where the flowing nature of water (and structural form of ice, as Lily hits upon) make it more amenable for repairing wounds. Fire is just about unheard of in this capacity. Wind is too ephemeral (lightning, as a corollary, is deemed too destructive).
But earth does have structure. And when you pair earth with water...
"You're trying to get the body to return to whatever it was like before, basically," he explains, gesturing vaguely with his right hand. "Well, minus some blood. But you're trying to fill in the gaps, get it to fit back together... like," and he grabs for a stick with his left hand, scratching a moment in the patch of bared earth near where he sits. "Did you ever think about how long the coastline is? Seems pretty easy to figure out -- you just measure it. But how," and he's sketching, of all things, a tree-like structure, "are you measuring it?"
He draws branches off of branches, working finer until he can't draw any further. "You could argue, at the right scale, a coastline is infinitely long. The same thing's true of the body. Arteries, capillaries, veins... You don't have to force any of it. You bridge the gaps. You bring it together. Carefully. If you're pushing, you'll break something important that you can't see." He looks over at her. "Do you get it?"
<Pose Tracker> Lily Keil has posed.
Lily watches the strange stare--and it's only because of that that she doesn't immediately respond to his counter. He apparently does do it completely differently, and the idea is to learn another approach. She considers mentioning that breaking bones takes less force.
Probably not productive.
"Right," she says about the body at first; in that, they're on the same page. He speaks of measurement, and she looks at him like she gets it immediately, that it's very simple--and then he asks how, and considers the structure.
"...So," she says, "You build. That makes more sense. But... hm." She eyes the structure thoughtfully. "Working with it as an infinity instead of directly measuring..."
"So, you're saying it you build it by 'feel'; go with what's there, and extend until you reach the other end, adjusting as needed." Lily lifts her palm, and blue circuitry gleams lightly on the back of her hand, on her fingers. "...Building is exactly what I do with ice," she considers.
Then, "Ordinarily what I do is envision what is meant to be present; what should be there, if not for the damage. I've been doing that much since I was a child."
She looks to the structure below. "Calculating the necessary force without harder numbers seems like it's more trouble. Like... take your sketch. This branch--it opens at 26.25 degrees, opening .57 centimeters away from the previous branch. I can tell you the value that I need to bridge that gap. But..." There's been no measurement in that time that's visible, anyway. "...No, I can adapt to that. Let's see..." Lily's fingernail extends--no, a blade of ice extends from her finger. She starts scratching numbers and formulae into the dirt thoughtfully, her other hand moving for the knife in her boot.
"Are you ready to demonstrate? Obviously I should be the subject for this if I'm going to analyze it."
<Pose Tracker> Loren Voss has posed.
"Well," he starts to say, then scowls. "It's not just feel. I know how the body works. No two bodies are exactly alike, but they all work essentially the same. No one's walking around with a, a," he gestures vaguely, "a pumpkin for a head," why is he bringing that one up as the example, "or something. You can make basic assumptions and calculations, but since I'm not here to give you four years of schooling in a few weeks, I'm skipping over that step. Besides, if you already know how to walk, so to speak, I'm not going to teach you the basics. I'm going to show you how to walk without, er,"
Perhaps the metaphor got away from him, because he just scowls again and shakes his head as if irritated.
"What I'm saying is that you learn to feel for where you can reach. If you go too far, you'll hurt yourself. If you go too forcefully, you'll hurt the patient. If you don't use any force -- and yes, Keil, you have to use a little just to get things to align the way they're meant to be, I am not contradicting myself -- you might as well not even try using Ether."
He continues. "You need knowledge, but also experience. You can't just say 'okay, I'll have wiggle room of thirty degrees here before I bust something' because of the natural variation in a body. You have to learn what that feels like. And this," he says, gesturing again with his left hand towards his tree-like sketch, "is what I'm trying to do here. I'm trying to show you how this is supposed to work."
Loren, of course, may not be the best of teachers.
Or the most patient, to judge by his current face.
Then she explains how she thinks of it and his shoulders slouch. "That's what I'm trying to say! You want to get it back to a normal -- but not by forcing it! Look, just..."
She goes on. He squints, then outright stares at her. "Wait, you can tell that?" Loren queries, going so far as to raise an eyebrow. Even he'd have to measure it, and he's a huge nerd (especially about math). "Look -- accuracy's good, but I'm trying to tell you, it's impossible to do measurement consciously when you're trying to mend a gut wound. You want to tell the body to fix itself and return to how it was," minus some blood, "and you've also got to do it quickly."
She proposes a more practical test.
"...You're serious."
He pauses, regarding her.
"You're messed up, you know that, Keil? But fine. I'll show you how I do it."
He fixes her with a long stare.
"And then you can show me." He reaches for his medical bag and fishes out a scalpel.
Wait... does he also mean...?
<Pose Tracker> Lily Keil has posed.
"Right," Lily agrees about knowing how the body works. She considers the pumpkins for a head. She's pretty sure she remembers those. Nevertheless, "We both have the basic background," she confirms. "You're trying to teach me to walk without setting anything on fire."
She doesn't even sound annoyed. Probably because he's irritated. Or maybe because she finds the subject interesting enough. Something about the student...
"Hmm," Lily answers. "It makes sense if you're building a construct; the force would diffuse within the wound and make it worse, if you didn't just build it wrong to begin with."
She wave her hand about contradictions. Instead... True the body does vary. "Hm..." She pauses. Trying to say the same thing? "Force is how you make effects," Lily says with a shrug. The implication of course is tht she uses force for most everything.
But the stare? "Oh, right," Lily replies. "I guess that's unusual in Ether-users, too. I've always been able to do that." But why? The question does occur to her now. Still--
"So work with the body, not just with your own force," Lily restates. "...All right." He pauses, again. "Heh. So I hear. But how else can we get a practical assessment? Find some animal to experiment on? It's a waste of time." Lily asks. She considers him, then. "Hmm. I thought you would be more averse to pain," she considers. "It doesn't bother me. Like I said before, I got over the fear of pain when I was a child."
But she might respect him more that he's going for it--that's the kind of tone she has, as she pulls up the knife and drags it across her bare arm, opening a line that wells blood immediately. This may be the real test of his intentions. Or at least, one of hers.
<Pose Tracker> Loren Voss has posed.
"Force is how you break things," Loren grouses.
Force is how you make ripples in the world though -- how people like van Houten get places. Without the ability to cause change in the world, you're relegated to the sidelines... and only the 'heroes' get forgiven.
His gaze darkens briefly. He grunts, then glances away, down at the sketch he's drawn. A tree, yes, but a tree with only one branch one stem one leaf one vein of note.
"..."
Loren looks back up at her, then nods. "Yeah. Work with, rather than against. It's about flow. Working with structure, building structure. Guiding it together."
This may in fact be the thing that does give him an edge above other field support in his role: he has control over both the element that permits structure-building and the element that permits flow and guided movement.
"I'm not hurting an animal," he says, shooting her a look. "What's the point of that?"
Come to think of it, what would Solaris have trained someone like Loren on?
"I'm not afraid of pain," he retorts. "I am concerned that's the first thing you went to, though. But fine. Let's do it. I might as well show you how it's done."
He watches the knife as she draws it, drags it across her palm. The blood beads up. He narrows his eyes, then pushes his glasses just a fraction of the way up the bridge of his nose. "Now watch," he says, grabbing her forearm, his fingers closing just about at the midway point.
He closes his eyes. He doesn't need to do it, but he wants to make a point.
And he takes a breath.
For him, his focus spreads thin, it hones in. It works inwards, downwards, stretching -- nearly, only nearly -- towards the approach of every tear and rend along the infinity of the internal coastline of her blood vessels, skin, nerves. Not so much thought as understanding -- bring it together. Be as you were. Accelerate. Slow down. Be.
To an outside observer, brilliant light radiates from where he grabs her arm, sliding along in a fractal mandala for her wound.
She's seen him do this with far less fanfare before; no doubt he's showing off to some extent -- making it obvious.
And then, after a moment, there is no wound.
There is no light.
He releases his grip and opens his eyes. "And?"
<Pose Tracker> Lily Keil has posed.
"That, too." Lily knows well breaking things--but she's another of those with 'force'. What would have happened if Loren was the one framed for betraying his people? Would it have gone differently?
Lily wonders what that glance down with darkened eyes means. But for all her perceptive ability she can't read minds, not really, not like this. Instead, she just nods, as it seems she has down the theory.
The combination of structure and flow is a potent one... and not one that Lily has nearly so neatly. Even with healing she uses force. Usually. But here...
"...Heh," Lily answers his concern. "Fair enough. You wouldn't be the first. Even 'savage lambs' get nervous when I do that."
He grabs her arm; she permits this. He focuses; her eyes don't close. ...She isn't using her eyes, though, not entirely. And understanding works; in brilliant light, the wound disappears. But what does that feel like, to such dedicated focus?
...It feels easier than normal, as if her arm wants to be fixed and is only looking for a way. But Lily tries to trail along that same path; she looks where the mandala guides, and then remembers--Flow, guidance. She stops trying to think it exactly and considers its essence, the shape of it.
She keeps looking down thoughtfully after that. She takes her arm back at length, and looks up at Loren again. "I think I have the idea. 'Guiding' rather than commanding. It's..." She shakes her head. "I admit it's more efficient than my usual approach. Calmer, somehow. It's more like breathing in than breathing out, in terms of the power involved."
<Pose Tracker> Loren Voss has posed.
Most likely -- at least the way he sees it -- he would just be dead. There's only one reason and one alone that no one's been assigned to exterminate van Houten.
And that's because even as a traitor, she's valuable in a way that few others can match. Because she's the golden girl, the girl with all the gifts.
There are more than a few reasons for that odd expression that he gains there, before he glances down at his sketch.
"That's because you're a mess," he tells her, moments before she draws a knife across her palm, before...
When a body is first formed -- when the first cell divides, when those cells divide, and so on throughout development, there is a plan. The form is more or less already decided, and what will become follows accordingly. There may be some deviations and changes along the way but the result is still a body. The form is still recognizable.
Embyrology is not even remotely Loren's strong suite, but it doesn't matter -- this much, he knows, and it's this sense of 'form' that he assumes the body wants to be in even when injured. A memory without a mind, perhaps -- a ground state, whatever that might be at any given time. All he's doing is giving it a push, feeding power into it. Permitting it to reassume that state, with the appropriate guidance.
He watches her a moment once it's done.
Then, he nods. "Yeah. If you push, you by default will put too much force into it. You'll break something. Another person. A town." He pauses, considering her. "Maybe even that boy of yours."
If only he could be that lucky, but some things in life you just have to accept you probably won't get. He unfolds his legs, shifting with a grimace into a different seated position.
And pops the scalpel out of its wrapping.
He regards his hand for a moment. He's only ever done this once -- and that was just the tip of his thumb, just to see what it was like.
But...
He stares at his hand, and for a long moment, it might seem that he just about stares through his hand.
For glory, then.
He moves the scalpel in one clean motion across his palm. He doesn't feel anything. Did it cut...?
Ah. There's the blood. He stares at his hand himself as if it were not at all his.
"Those markings on your skin," he says, still staring at his palm. At his blood. "What are they?"
<Pose Tracker> Lily Keil has posed.
"I'm most of what Father wanted me to be," Lily answers distantly. It was something her 'parents' wanted, wasn't it? To learn that way, to prepare. There are clearly other ways to learn than this trial and error of the self, maybe some reason others don't have the same.
Lily has explored the nature of her power for a long time, but some things remain black boxes, so to speak--things she can't quite understand but can use all the same. It is not so different though, to guide instead of command; it reaches the same point.
But what else could reach out to that 'memory'? What else could tap into this 'form'?
"Yeah, this method..." She lifts an eyebrow as he mentions Leon. "Trust me. You don't want that any more than I do," she says seriously. What was the difference between them, Id had said? 'He's still alive.' It was something like that.
Lily of course just used her regular knife that she uses for everything else; it's hardly sterile, but she showed little concern for that for herself. Loren uses the appropriate tool. Or, he will--when he stares, and looks. Lily is curious as he does, wondering... But ah--there it is. The blood.
"You didn't learn about them before?" she wonders. Back then. ...It's a dangerous question to ask. But then...
"I don't know," she says truthfully. "They appear when I work magic beyond something minor, stronger with stronger magic. I believe they're some kind of mechanical device, but I've taken deep wounds and never come across the metal that should form them if so, no projectors, no nothing." She leaves out her vulnerability without them; he doesn't need to know that. If he decides to use it against her, she might have an advantage; traditional means against machines don't affect them. But if he might have a guess...
"I'll show you," she says, and reaches out to take Loren's wrist. She puts her hand over his palm, fingers close to the wound. She breathes in, and out; the process is slow, and the blood keeps dripping as she does. Her markings appear, and at first they are red--but then they shift blue, as she breathes in, carefully. She reaches her awareness outward, towards the blood, and the wound. She knows what it should be, as she gathers up energy within herself. But instead of asserting that, she tries to contact... to set power in place.
Her fingers begin to frost over. There is still some time before the effect starts. She has to find that point, and... feather. Feather...
"Like driving," Lily murmurs, and lets a little power go. The ice creeps from her fingertips down her fingers to the meat of her hand, the opposite of the mandala effect in some ways. But as this happens...
The wound starts to close; the flesh starts to mend, as blue light weeps from her hands like snowfall. In a few moments it is gone, and then the light is gone.
The ice remains on her hand for the moment, her closed eyes suggesting she may not notice it--or may not find it matters. She practically exudes cold. But it worked.
<Pose Tracker> Loren Voss has posed.
"Then your father is a fool," Loren remarks, casting a glance her way. Now, what was it about her father that he remembers...
Ah, right. What had been released about Dietrich Keil from the specialists teams. Apparently he'd turned traitor against Kislev, current whereabouts unknown. Seems about right for the lineage, if he's to use Lily as any benchmark.
He remarks on none of that, instead merely raising an eyebrow when Lily remarks that nobody wants to see a world where Leon is dead. "Hmm," he utters rather neutrally, watching her a moment.
But then the scalpel's out, and in a flash across his palm.
He's not unused to seeing his blood. That's just about normal.
But it's a strange thing to cut the flesh.
And to think about the nature of blood. No -- it's wrong to say it's 'like seawater'. Seawater is far saltier than blood, for one. But, perhaps it's thinking about the sodium and chloride, or the origin of life, or...
Anaitis had said they had liked the ocean. Loren watches his blood seep slowly from the shallow wound across his palm and can't help but reflect that, only a few days ago, Anaitis had held his hand...
His gaze flicks back up at Lily, and for a moment it's as if he's staring through her. "Nothing much," he says, on the markings. It's mostly true. They had worked out a few things about the markings, and some of them they had even told him about.
He'd asked about the markings before -- the answer she'd given then was less than the one she gives now.
"Huh," Loren replies, as if he were approaching this conversation from a distance. "Not an implant. But not a natural part of your body. Interesting."
There are a few answers for that. He's not stupid -- he keeps up with medical advances.
But he's not going to tell her any of them.
She takes his hand, or more accurately, his wrist. Briefly, he has the impression -- if not the actual sensation -- of heat.
And then it's all cold.
He grimaces at the chill, but doesn't say anything. Breaking her concentration now is probably a bad idea. Instead, he just watches, as if to evaluate every step she takes.
And in the end, slips his hand from hers, flexing the fingers experimentally.
"...Not bad," he allows, shaking his head the once. "But next time, pull back on the externals. People have enough of a problem with body temperature drop when they're badly hurt. Don't make it worse."
He, at least, appears to have returned to his usual nasty self, having left whatever fugue state he had been in well behind him.
<Pose Tracker> Lily Keil has posed.
"We'll see," Lily answers cryptically about her 'father'.
She has no reason to reinforce her comment as to Leon. Instead, she notes Loren's strange fugue, and there's no reason that such a shallow wound would send him into shock. She can think about it in a moment. Buut...
"I think so, too," Lily answers when he calls it interesting. And here she notices the strangeness lasting. She cannot dwell on it completely as she focuses; it takes all of her concentration to attempt the new spell. But in the aftermath, seeing the difference in his demeanor from moments ago, she can.
"Next time," Lily confirms, "I won't have to bleed off as much power measuring it. Assuming you're within normal human parameters, anyway." She considers. "Which I'm not so sure about. That was an awfully strange reaction, just then." The medical knowledge is something she knows; she has less training in it, less advanced training, than Loren. She nevertheless has a lot of experience in mundane medicine on the battlefield. But Loren back to his usual nasty self--
"Thanks, for the information. I'll have to practice it; it's an interesting approach." She pauses. "...You realize it's not the first time you've been acting strangely, this offer aside. Back near Djose..." She trails off, and shakes her head. She's sure she saw something, but she doesn't imagine the response she'll get in the next instant is pleasant, either.
<Pose Tracker> Loren Voss has posed.
Some people do get lightheaded at the sight of blood. But one would assume that lightheadedness at the sight of blood would preclude one from a career as a field medic.
But he seems normal enough now.
For him, that is.
He squints at her.
"What are you talking about?" he remarks, looking at her like she's sprouted two heads. "The wound healed."
It takes the rest of the explanation from her -- such that it is -- for him to realize she doesn't mean that he healed funny.
More that there was something weird about him.
"At Djose?"
He... remembers that he was feeling back then... like he wanted to...
His gaze unfocuses for a moment, before he seems to snap back to the here and now. He shakes his head. "Shut up," he tells her, rather bluntly, detatchment giving way to confusion giving way to nastiness. "I didn't ask for your medical opinion. I'm fine," he insists, pushing back against the undertow, that part of his mind that can only answer him thus:
'You're lying.'
He rises to his feet then, gazing off at the Sword Cathedral, irritation still writ plain across his face.
"Anyway. I've had enough for one day. I'm calling it here."