2020-09-14: Even If It Hurts

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  • Log: Even If It Hurts
  • Cast: Gwen Whitlock, Ashley Winchester
  • Where: Valeria Chateau
  • Date: September 14th, 2020
  • Summary: Ashley finds the thief that has been pilfering his cooling delicious bakery goods. Gwen makes it up to him by offering to bake, and the two find they have some world views in common. Both are dorks, love delicious baked goods, believe in the good in people, and have been or are wanted criminals!

<Pose Tracker> Gwen Whitlock has posed.

    With how many conflicts Gwen was in in such a short span of time, it would be easy for someone to think of the courier as somehow indestructible. Or, maybe, just incredibly foolhardy to a dangerous extent. Or, more likely, there was no opinion at all, because Gwen wasn't alone in all these battles.

    Whatever illusion might have been hinted at is demolished by now. Gwen had spent days in a loopy state, devouring food and helping herself to sleep in odd corners of the building as her body demanded. Sweet things and fatty things were subject to disappearing, taken by a distracted courier's hand as she walked by.

    At some point, Gwen got better, though the clothing she was loaned to replaced her tattered threads still looks awkward on her, oversized in order to fit over bandages and her own ARM, which wasn't really made to be put in the nicer sets of ladies clothing the Chateau had on hand.

    And she isn't alone in this, either, in healing. Never alone. Never... alone...

    "When is the Chateau going to be docking?" There's the courier, talking to one of the many staff that keep the flying fortress in working order.

    "Can't say for sure. Probably when we get over an area that is safe to land for supplies, is my guess. I bet there's someone who can get you to the surface if you need to do it today." The staff rests his hands on his mop. "I could point you a few directions, if you like."

    "..." Gwen muses over this, one earring dangling from the slow tilt of her head. "I'm fine. Just was feeling restless."

    It is a floating chateau, after all. Bound to be more than a few people who are restlessly wandering about.

    The courier needs to get her mind off things. Though, what exactly is the thing she feels so restless about, anyway?

    ..... ANd asking that just invites more restlessness.

<Pose Tracker> Ashley Winchester has posed.

Ashley Winchester is not in the Puppy Room. This is a marked improvement over what he was like at the beginning of the week, but one does not simply walk off getting your brain punched by the Contact. He's moved from being buried in a fluffy pile of snuggly puppies to stress-baking, which is at *least* a few rungs up the ladder comparatively.

It's better than stress-eating, for sure. Though, Ashley does seem to be (unintentionally...?) enabling the bad habits and poor diets of the rest of his coworkers. But something strange has been happening to his randomly dispersed piles of tasty pastries. Someone... Has been eating them!! (Oh no!!) This wouldn't be a problem, except that it seems someone is taking a disproportionate share of donuts, and that just isn't right! They already have one donut fiend, whose presence Ashley has accounted for, but to have a *second* aboard is... Worrying.

And so Ashley is in the hallway just ahead of Gwen, staring suspiciously at a metal platter-- empty, save for the occasional crumb. "Another one, huh...? On the one hand, I'm flattered. But who could be responsible...?"

<Pose Tracker> Gwen Whitlock has posed.

    Gwen needs to get off the chateau soon. Not now, it's too far away, but if this goes towards the northwest at a certain speed, they'd be getting there in about, oh, two days? But if she comes with the chateau, that will draw attention, and she needs to be quiet. The success of this will depend on a certain degree of subtly, but of course, when she gets fully inside the base, she can just let loose as long as her target is there.

    Also this is the hallway with all the delicious pastries. Surely she can find something wonderful to eat here, if she looks around--

    .... wait

    What was she thinking about, again?

    Right, pastries. Nothing else before that.

    Gwen's rumbling stomach greets the back of Ashley, who she is quite confident is Ashley and not Janus, this time around. Really, how could she even mistake one for the other? They are complete, and utter opposites. Just a cruel joke, played on her by her own psyche. For one, Gwen has never tasted Janus's baking and the thought of willingly eating anything he's freely baked and offered is... scary.

    "... Huh, were you the one who was baking all those pastries?" Gwen reaches up with her bare right hand, and itches the barely tamed pale red curls on her head. "That explains it, then..."

    She stands there, a long moment. "Uh, I'm sorry."

    For eating all the pastries. Maybe.

    "For almost shooting you on the Warwing Varkwhatsit." She sniffs, and then coughs into the back of her hand. "... It was a long day." Pause. "Well, okay, that goes without sayin', since it was a long day for you too."

    Another pause.

    "Also, if you meant those for someone, I'm sorry for eatin' 'em. They were really good, though. If that helps."

<Pose Tracker> Ashley Winchester has posed.

It's okay Gwen. Ashley also has to deal with strange voices telling him to do terrible and unusual things. 'Set fire to the world, Ashley Winchester' says one spooky voice, 'Let it all burn and turn to ash and melt like wax, and we shall revel together in the scattering embers!'

Another voice occasionally chimes in to say stuff like 'Hey you know Marina is cute and would definitely like that pretty brooch in the window why don't you buy her a present and while you're at it maybe buy lilka a new parasol too.' And sometimes, he even has a third voice, who only says: 'doooonuuuuts, make me more dooooonuuuuts.'

So, Ashley understands. Not that he's aware of what's playing out in Gwen's mind at the moment or anything, but he totally gets it! Really!

"Huh?" Ashley, not Janus, turns around and finds Gwen standing there awkwardly like someone who needs to apologize for something that the other party might have already forgotten about. "Oh! Gwen! I'm glad it was just you. I was worried that I hadn't accounted for someone... No, it's fine! These were for anyone to take. I expected to have some leftovers, but if you're that hungry, I'll just have to make a new batch!"

"And, uh, you didn't shoot me. So that's fine too!" Ashley laughs, picking the platter up off the windowsill. "Besides, I don't think I would have died even if you did try to kill me. I can understand it being a long day, though. I think it was a long day for... a lot of us?"

<Pose Tracker> Gwen Whitlock has posed.

    .... a new batch

    Guardians, Ashley really is the Janus Gwen had wished for, even if in no reality would Janus become someone like this.

    But that brings to mind some critical questions, namely, *why* Ashley is even in the situation he's in.

    "... I'll make it up to you." A bright twinkle of determination enters Gwen's eyes. "I'll help you bake."

    Because there are some questions Gwen needs to ask Ashley, now that the two of them are alone. Ones that may be to sate Gwen and Gwen's curiosity alone, but questions, nonetheless.

    "Unless you'd like to take a break. Though, in either case..." She picks up the sadly empty platter. "I have a few questions, if you'd care to answer them. I wanted to know about that... thing you did. How you changed into that other form, with the armor." She turns, giving Ashley a small grin. "Don't worry, I just wanna ask what's up with it. N' I'd be the last person to judge someone because of that, if you're thinkin' that, too."

    She hesitates. "T'be honest, I was surprised to learn you were a soldier in any form. I figured you were like me, n' just got swept up into things."

<Pose Tracker> Ashley Winchester has posed.

It's true. Ashley Winchester is all the good things about Janus Cascade that fell off when his soul shriveled into a prune, and then went back in time and gathered across all universes to form a single individual. Or something. Really it's just a hilarious coincidence, or maybe the two really *are* related somehow. After all, Ashley *is* an orphan...!

Maybe... maybe they're... twins...?

"Oh!" Ashley brightens at the offer, then nods firmly. "Yes, I think that'll be a great help. Your arm... Does it have a heating setting in the palm? I'm going to need you to increase the temperature in your hand by a few degrees and help me knead up some dough. I'm told that yeast rises extra-good when it's kneaded by warm hands...!"

This is the power of the legendary SOLAR PALMS!!

Ashley leads Gwen to one of the chateau's kitchens. The chateau has several, in fact, and one of them is curiously well-outfitted for baking. Almost as if someone had intentionally kitted the place out for the job...! He gestures at a counter covered with ingredients, "Come on, let's get started! This'll be fun--"

Gwen asks about his super form. Ashley looks sheepish, all of a sudden. Is it an embarassing secret? Does he have some kind of armor parasite living in an uncomfortable crevasse...!?

"Well, uh," he says, now awkward in his own right, "How much do you know about the... Sword Magess?"

<Pose Tracker> Gwen Whitlock has posed.

    All the good parts, plus some others, and a cultivation in someplace that *wasn't* Little Twister.

    Which likely goes to the core to how the two divert so much; Janus is Janus because that was what it took to survive as a young adult in such extreme conditions. Gwen herself would have been dead, with little in the way of miraculous treatment. An orphanage could only go so far to keep a girl alive before prayers were needed to pad the deficits of the town that just couldn't.

    Gwen looks blankly at Ashley, and looks to her right hand, which she raises to look at, turning the intricately paneled fingers over until it faces palm up, the earlier opening now closed by way of a small hatch with miniature curling panels that close towards the middle.

    She imagines dough getting into every crease, flour filtering into the inner parts, her arm selling like old sugar and butter whenever she tried to warm it up for battle. "Hm. I better get some gloves, first, as much as I'd like t'be able to run my fingers over everything. But yeah, I think I could manage somethin' like that. Nothing fine-tuned, but it'd be a good experiment."

    There is, in fact, a glove, which Gwen makes do with, using a length of canvas to cover the rest. "There we go-- mm?"

    Out of all the faces she expected Ashley to have in being asked such pointed questions, 'embarrassment' is not high up on the list.

    ..... did she miss something really embarrassing

    ".... Sword Magess..." She frowns. "... Kinda. I never really looked deeply into it, but I've been to the shrine." BOY DID SHE GO TO THE SHRINE, more than once

    "Something about... Equites?"

<Pose Tracker> Ashley Winchester has posed.

Whereas Ashley was raised by a loving family after he lost his birthparents to the unrest and conflict surrounding the Slayheim Liberation War. He was allowed to grow into a sensitive, kind-hearted young man, who only knew of the unpleasantness of the world by way of being keenly inclined to help salve the suffering it caused. He had no reason to grow into a vicious, merciless, prune-hearted blackguard like Janus Cascade.

"Oh! Sure, yes. Good idea. We can get you some gloves. Wouldn't want you uh, getting sugar-finger or anything," Ashley does in fact have a glove drawer! One of them is *HUGE* and unusually roomy around the wrist. Ashley might hold out hope that Brad would be down to spend some quality guy time in the bakery some day. Someday...

He hands Gwen a pair of more appropriately-sized gloves, though. "Here, this should do, I hope."

There's some stuff that needs doing first, though. Like getting a batch of dough ready to be kneaded! Ashley actually has a separate batch already ready, but he needs to replace what he uses. "Well. A long time ago, a heroine called the Sword Magess struck down the Blaze of Disaster with the legendary sword Argetlahm, and..."

Ashley sighs, the whole story would take a *long* while to tell. "A-anyway. For... reasons, I've got something locked up inside of me. I can tap into its power, and that's what the black knight is. That's the form that it takes."

"It's not exactly what I signed up for when I enlisted," he chuckles, warmly. "I mean. I wanted to be a hero but... This is a bit much, you know?"

<Pose Tracker> Gwen Whitlock has posed.

    Gwen notes Ashley's glove drawer, noting one pair's size, and the roomy excess around the wrist, far beyond what Gwen herself would need. Such a glove would be perfect for--

    She laughs with the realization. ".... Seems like something that would be great for someone like Brad."

    Ashley thankfully has more appropriately sized gloves for Gwen herself, which the redhead begins to carefully put on. For all the ARM's strength, its shape and size is human enough to fill out the glove, with nothing too visible to show the nature of the flesh underneath, if it could be counted as flesh.

    "Oh, right, right. Now I remember. I read about it as a kid." She kneads the dough when instructed-- while she's a novice in comparison to Ashley, Gwen finds peace in carefully working the dough, listening to Ashley. "It's okay, that part I can probably get details on."

    For reasons, something is locked up inside of Ashley. He can tap into its power, and the black knight's form is from that power.

    What is that power, and how does it relate to that story? Maybe, Gwen's already heard its identity. But maybe, she misheard.

    "And that power comes from...." The question comes out, half-formed like the dough beneath her fingers. Unresolved.

    She switches gears.

    "Did you get it so you'd be able to fight back in situations, like the one we were in? You faced off against Id, and... I don't think anyone could really stand toe to toe with him like you did."

    Until whatever happened. Gwen's own psyche wasn't exactly solid right about then. "But you did it, and you survived well enough to help later on. That's pretty amazin'."

     How would Gwen's own powers do against Id, or Ashley? The lack of control would be a problem, definitely, but, if the worst happened...

     She realizes she's stopped kneading the dough. "... Bah, my hand keeps getting too warm."

<Pose Tracker> Ashley Winchester has posed.

"Ahahahaha, y-yeah, you caught me," Ashley laughs, embarassed like his HERO-WORSHIP MAN-CRUSH was just detected. "It hasn't come in handy just yet... But one of these days! Definitely!"

But it seems like Gwen is at least familiar with the general gist of the story. Ashley nods his head along and kneads the dough slowly but firmly. She seems to be having trouble-- "Don't worry about it. If your hand gets too warm, just try to dial down the power and focus on keeping a regular rhythm. We don't want to dry the bread out, just to mix up the flour and water and give the yeast some room to breathe...!"

This is Baking 101, somehow Gwen is being taught how to bread...!?

"...That power," he says, as the conversation turns back toward darker, less bread-shaped topics. "It's the Blaze of Disaster itself. Or rather, it's where the Demon Lord and the Holy Sword meet. At that point is where Knight Blazer's power is born. As for how I got it..."

What is he to say? Should he tell her that it was all a Marivellian plot? Gwen is sure to find out someday, but it's not really his place to tell her. And yet, to just blame Odessa for it now...

"Someone tried summoning demons at the Sword Cathedral," he says, instead. "My platoon got caught up in it... And I was the only survivor. When I came to, I was near the sword pedestal, and Argetlahm was gone. Supposedly, it's inside me now too. But against something like the Demon of Elru... I don't know. I could maybe keep it up for short periods, but I'm afraid what might happen if I rely on that power too much."

<Pose Tracker> Gwen Whitlock has posed.

    "I don't blame you. Brad's a neat guy. Got a story kinda 'bout him, a little." Gwen industriously kneads as she continues. "ARMS members were called to Kattlelox Island- I was there doing courier work, n' got really interested in what the heck was goin' on. We met a guy there that looked like Brad. He fought like Brad, had his voice, the whole bit. But that thing was not Brad. You could tell, with how he spoke."

    Gwen's hand slow. "I never realized how much I genuinely liked the guy until I saw that copy get so much wrong about the very man he was trying to pose as. Uh, oh, just in case." Gwen holds up her left- then switches quickly to her right ARM, still clothed. "It's clothed now, yeah, but there's only one of this. They can't clone an ARM, or otherwise they would have just gone with that instead of botherin' to make copies of people."
    
    As Ashley guides her, Gwen takes to his instructions readily, grinning as the air begins bulk up the dough under her fingers. No wonder Ashley was baking so many things; it probably gave him a level of peace Gwen was hunting up and down the hallways attempting to find.

    "The Blaze of Disaster?" Gwen stops, looking over her shoulder towards Ashley. "You got that, inside you?"

    How incredibly close did the world all come to disaster, when this happened? If it had been someone else, someone just a little more a proper soldier, not even someone with an evil heart, but an ordinary person, not too different from Ashley himself. Someone who just didn't have that one small sliver that made a difference, who would have been just as heroic.

    Or maybe, it wasn't Ashley that changed it, but the sword.

    Gwen's expression softens, and she turns to properly face Ashley then, dipping her head. "I'm sorry. If I had known I would've brought up something painful like that, I wouldn't have asked."

    He didn't even get a choice. Gwen chose. He didn't, and still, he's able to--

    'I'm afraid what might happen if I rely on that power too much.'

    Gwen's head snaps up, surprised at the familiar words. Words she would have said herself, at some point, but not now. How has she changed?

    "... I get that." She nods, slowly. "That was a pretty unique situation. I've never seen Id act this way before, posing as Fei. Hopefully, it won't happen again. It may be worth it to maybe talk to Fei, sometime, when tensions ease. I think the two of you'd have a lot you could talk about, maybe help each other out on." She smiles. "Though, I can't speak for Fei like that. I don't know what caused what happened, but I've never known either of them t'act without a cause, for better or worse."

<Pose Tracker> Ashley Winchester has posed.

    "I'm kind of glad I wasn't there for that operation," Ashley says with a sigh. The fact that Odessa is able to make such convincing clones is bad enough without having to deal with the potential pain of betrayal. If Lord Blazer is indeed fed by Ashley's negative emotions, then something like that... wouldn't be good for him, probably. "I'd heard about it in a debriefing and from the others, but depending on what kind of buttons the clone might know to push... It might have been bad. I don't even want to think they might do if they can make a clone of me, too..."

Well. That's what bread is for, at least. The act of making it, baking it, and then serving it and seeing faces light up-- it's soothing to the soul in a deep and primal way. Making something with one's hands, then seeing another person enjoy the fruit of your labors, it all satisfies something intrinsic to one's humanity.

"I like to think that, just like you could tell it wasn't Brad, that I'd be able to do the same. And that everyone would be able to tell if there was a clone of me running around." Like a certain JANUS CASCADE!!!

Totally not an evil clone. Definitely.

"...Yeah," he says of the things inside him. "I can feel it sometimes, trying to ask why I'm not doing certain things. Why I don't just use the power it offers. But... Unless it's necessary, I shouldn't. I don't want to think that I'm only useful here because of the demon's power, either. Until I can't anymore, I'm going to try to be <<me>> for as long as I can."

Maybe Fei really does have insights into their shared experiences. Maybe. "...Id seemed kind of upset after he... made contact with me. I don't know if he'd be willing to open up again, but he did give me some really good advice before. So... maybe?"

He shakes his head, "Don't worry about it. It's just a fact of my life, you know? And someday, maybe we'll figure out a way to get it out of me safely. Or maybe the Blaze of Destruction will calm down a little someday, understand that this world is too important to destroy."

<Pose Tracker> Gwen Whitlock has posed.

` Gwen shakes her head. "I don't think they'd be able to replicate the presence inside you, if you're worried about that. If they did, they'd probably not bother with doing anything else. And I don't think they'd be able t'get your personality down. It'd be all extremes and little of the stuff inbetween. If people mistake a clone of you for you, it's probably because they didn't get a chance to know you first."

    It's hard to sell the more genuine parts of a person. If the clones were something closer to human, then maybe...

    .... It would be even worse, to think about it.

    "There was a clone of me there, but it was just as easy to spot." Her lips draw in a thin line. "Damned thing was pretty much a parody of me. A bimbo with a chainsaw for a hand. Pissed me th'hell off that someone'd have that low of an opinion of me."

    Looking Ashley over, Gwen cracks a small smile. "I'm not sure how I mistook you for my old friend." She sighs, working at the dough. "His personality's shitty, yeah, but like, that's what you had to be, to survive. He was the one who was going to be the great Drifter, a hero, even. Maybe, if the dice rolled a little differently, he'd be the same sorts of people we'd work with everyday. The people who've seen the darkness in the world, stared into it, even, and came out the other side still human. There's many people like that out there, especially in the Badlands. Good people, but people who are willin' to get their hands dirty. Maybe..."

    She revives that old, dead hope, feels it jerk in her chest with the same old pain. She closes her eyes. "Sorry, I'm dumping all this on you. If you meet Janus in battle, you can't let words like mine steer you wrong, because he won't hold back against anyone in his way."

    Gwen listens to Ashley explain more, about the urging, the feelings he has.

    A nugget of guilt rises in her throat, as she compares her own situation.

    There has been no voice, no urging beyond the same ones that would urge her to eat, or breathe. Because it all felt natural, in each moment.

    If she didn't have someone whose personality ran in similar directions, would she even question herself? Setanta's influence is there, most likely, but it couldn't be the same as...

    As the boy, the young man, the being with the blue eyes, who calls to her, who feels like her counterpart. Not like a sibling, like Hiro and Ruby do, or even that distant, familial way Loren feels now.

    It's a part of her that was now there, that resonated with Isiris.

    "Maybe try to catch Fei, instead. Even if you two have to butt heads again for whatever reason, I think there's a type of support you two could give one another."

    She wets her lips, and continues.

    "But be careful, Ashley. Sometimes kindness and sympathy can be the crack that lets the wrong one in. I don't know the nature of what's inside you, but I don't want to see that part of you go away." She looks back towards the dough, placing her hands on it. "But I get it, I really do. Maybe... here's someone I could show the same to."

     Setanta... would she be strong enough to give some small thing in return? "Kindness can't always be a weakness," she murmurs. "I'm sure of it."

<Pose Tracker> Ashley Winchester has posed.

How do you know that the face in the mirror is you? How can you be certain? Is the room in the mirror a little bit different? What about your face? Are you sure you're smiling right now? Is that twinkle of malice in the mirror-man's eye in yours as well? And what about the shadowy hand creeping up from your shoulder toward your throat--

But Doppelgangers aren't really mirror-people, are they?

"That's awful," Ashley says with a look of genuine sympathy. "I hope I never have to find out how demeaning that's gotta be. You're probably right, though. If they could replicate the Blazer, then there wouldn't be any point to half of anything they're doing, right?"

But then the conversation turns. Janus may very well be Ashley Winchester's own doppelganger... Or maybe he's not? Maybe the roads they've both taken had diverged from the moment of birth, and any resemblance is nothing more than skin-deep...? "It sucks that anyone has to be that way to survive. But..." Give him a chance? Sometimes kindness and sympathy *are* how the bad ones get their hooks into you. "But even so," Ashley answers, his voice firm. "Even so, you need to believe in the good that's out there, to keep reaching out, even if it hurts. Even if the other person stabs you in the back. This world... There's already enough suffering in it, isn't there? We don't have to add to it if we don't have to."

"But I understand," he admits, at last. "Don't worry, I know bad situations turn up. You know I was in prison once? Illsveil, actually! Same one Brad was locked up in."

There's a story there.

HOO BOY there's a story there.

<Pose Tracker> Gwen Whitlock has posed.

    How can you be sure you were really you, and not some evil force from long ago, or from another dimension?

    Mirror-people want to know!

    "O-oh," Gwen laughs, bashful in front of Ashley's sympathy. "I mean, it probably wouldn't be so bad, if these clones weren't simple mock-ups? I don't think they're meant to really exist for very long, or really have a solid consciousness beyond 'do a thing for Odessa'. Which--" She pauses, feeling the dough between her fingers. "... A being like that... that'd be kinda sad, you know...? When you think about it." The best thing, of course, would be to--

    Ashley's words of advice cause Gwen to look up from her kneading and give him a warm smile, one that reaches up into the twinkle of her eyes, no sign of possible malice. "I thought there weren't more people that thought like that out there. So many times, I felt like I was the one who got people hurt, because I wanted to keep extending my hand towards one person. But you're right, you know? There's good in people. I want to always believe that."

    Then Ashley brings up that he was in a prison once, and not only that, Illsveil, of all places!!

    Gwen's eyes grow round as she considers Ashley, this Ashley, the one that just recommended to try to see the good in people and to always reach your hand out, even if it hurts, yep, this is the guy that was in prison.

    "Wait, *you* were locked up?! You?" She squints, angling her head as she tries to imagine the man, caked in flour and as wholesome as a --puppy room--, in a jail cell. "Maybe I wasn't th'only one who mistook you for someone else."

<Pose Tracker> Ashley Winchester has posed.

"It's a pretty rare thing, finding people who try to keep doing right by other people even if it hurts! For some reason, getting burnt hardens hearts pretty quick." It's a mystery as to why! How strange. Turns out that avoidance is easy and the hedgehog's dilemma is a real thing. "I'm glad you're another one and--"

Prison!

"Yeeeeeeeaaaah," he scratches his head with a flour-covered hand, apparently totally fine with getting a bit of flour-dust up there. "So, on my first day of the job, I was framed for trying to murder Irving, and got locked up in Illsveil. Turns out though that it was part of a mission to get Brad out of there, but it still sucked! A lot!"

"I punched Irving in the face for that one," Ashley recounts with a huff. "Scheming jerk. But somehow I'm still working for the guy."

He shrugs! "Everyone deserves at least a second chance, right? And he hasn't broken his promise yet."

"Anyway, I figured it hurt more to keep holding onto that grudge. If we were going to work together, then I'd have to move past it... Even if it means keeping an eye on him, just in case. He has it rough for a rich guy, and sometimes he puts the ends before the means, but I think he's got a good heart under it all."

<Pose Tracker> Gwen Whitlock has posed.

    Gwen lets out a soft sigh. "Yeah. Though, sometimes, bein' the person who always tries to be the nice one can be as much of an act as any, when it comes down to it. What's just bein' nice, and what's actually bein' kind? That's the question I struggle with, sometimes."

    But anyway, PRISON!! Because Gwen really wants to see what led to this person being in a prison.

    "I remember Brad at referring to why he was a war criminal, but it sounds like all that stuff... all of it seems too messed up for me to decipher. Even moreso, if you got into jail because you were framed for an assassination attempt. By... .... wait, that's the guy who owns this chateau, right?! Damn, the guy seems to be up to a lot of plots. Can't say I agree with the whole 'ends justify the means' feel of that, but I guess..." Now it's Gwen's turn to mirror Ashley's head-scratching mannerism, but she stops herself, realizing her gloves are full of dough. "And I guess, if it was to get Brad out... it all worked out. But I don't blame you. People like Irving... they probably forget what it's like to be a part of plots like that. When you live in the clouds, it's hard to imagine what it's like for someone on the ground."

    Which probably explains a *lot* about Solaris, really.

    "So maybe, that's somethin' we all gotta do. grudge or no." She presses one fist into her open palm. "We need t'keep Irving's feet on the ground!"

    Pause. "Well, people of ARMS do. I'm content bein' the trusty ally and friend, because whew, havin' to deal with that fight during the convention was..." Something behind Gwen's eyes falters, like a thread being plucked in just the worst way. "... That was..."

    She finally lets out a sigh, and lets out a small chuckle. "That really, *really* sucked. I mean, I still have a bounty on my head from the guy the Wolves were tryin' to assassinate. But I'm glad you were there, Ashley. Knowing the way you think, it makes me feel like I can trust ARMS, at least, when it's someone like you or Brad tryin' to lead people around."

<Pose Tracker> Ashley Winchester has posed.

"As far as I know, Brad's spent way too long in Illsveil, and even longer on the run. I'm not sure what kind of levers Irving must have pulled to get people to stop chasing him, but I'd wager it has to do with preserving Illsveil's reputation of being impossible to escape? Like, it looks better for them to just... claim to have let Brad and I go, instead of dealing with having a prison break. I think Irving is just... Yeah, I think people who spend a lot of time plotting have a hard time of picturing how the cogs in their plans must feel. At least Irving does seem to care, but there's a lot of people out there who don't."

Like a certain SHAKHAN.

"I know it must have been hard, seeing that Shakhan guy hanging around. We don't get much news from Ignas, but it's not like we live in a vaccuum either," Ashley says with a sympathetic sigh. "But I think it'd undermine trying to mount a Filgaia-wide response to Odessa if we just arbitrarily started excluding people. And if he wasn't allowed in, then he might have just let Odessa set up shop there, right? So..." He heaves a shrug, "Or at least, that's the logic as far as I know it. You'd have to be Irving or Marivel to really know the big picture."

"...But thanks. It means a lot to hear that," Ashley says with a flour-dusted smile. "I know we get up to some... shady business sometimes. But I wouldn't be working with these guys if I didn't think they were on the up-and-up, even with the timebomb in my soul."

<Pose Tracker> Gwen Whitlock has posed.

    "Makes sense. I 'spose, with someone like Brad, it ain't like he's the type you really need to keep cooped up. He's got a ton of guilt as is, and I think he's done a whole lot more out here with you guys."

    Ashley makes his case as Gwen continues to knead as she speaks, finding resolve in the mundane act. "Nah, nah, you don't need to justify it to me. I was just there on delivery, y'know? When I saw him it wasn't like I was just gonna march on out on principal. Guys like him are a dime a dozen in Ignas. But there's good folks too. That whole deal... it just felt like someone was tryin' to pull strings, is all. Why would the Wolves attack now? Assumin' Shakhan is connected to Solaris, which he probably is with Gebler n' all, if he dies, they'd pop someone else right in. If I were some mastermind, if I wanted that whole conference shut down, seems like that'd be a great way of doin' it. The Wolves answer to the beat of their own drum, though, so maybe, it was all just..."

    But Odessa did attack right then. ".... Y'think.... Odessa might've done that? Had some mole go in and feed information to the Wolves? But how much of an advantage would that give, when they were able to just bulldoze their way in anyhow?" She shakes her head. "Maybe it was just all a giant mess of coincidences."

    Ashley smiles, flour dusting his face and hair, and Gwen laughs. "... If you're able t'do all that n' still keep a good outlook on things, maybe I need to step up my own game." She shakes her head. "Even if it's a danger, I'm glad you're the one making the calls here. When I get in my own state, I can't make much in the way of calls beyond just general ideas. So, it might mean you or another friend might have to snap me out of it if things get too wild." Her fingers slow, finally stopping as she turns to fully face Ashley. "But you won't be the only one, okay? So if you have to choose between me n' keepin' the peace, I want you t'do the latter. Because that's something you can do as Ashley, using the power of this, right here." She places a hand, over her heart. "That's your power as Ashley, no matter what your outside looks like."

Sure, it makes less sense when she does it, unless Ashley as a ARMS-esque heart, but still.
    

<Pose Tracker> Ashley Winchester has posed.

    "I think it'd be nice if folks like Brad could end up in a situation where they don't have to fight anymore. Somewhere they can live in peace, you know? Maybe once this whole Odessa thing is over and done with..." How hard is it to be a hero, really? Brad fought hard and became the <<Hero of Slayheim>> and for that he got thrown in prison. Being a Hero... Is it really all it's cracked up to be...?

    "It did seem a little... Weirdly orchestrated?" Ashley says after a few more moments of kneading. The dough's about ready though, so he starts rolling out bits of the yeasty mass into rings. Today's pastry is... donuts!? "If things went just a little bit sideways, a lot of people could have gotten hurt. But if anything, I think it just let us show how much ARMS is willing to put on the line for the sake of peace. Solaris, though..."

How are they going to deal with Solaris?

Is Irving planning on flying the Chateau right into Etrenank...??

"Well. One thing at a time. If we try to catch every hare in the field, we'll just end up skulking home with a thrown back and nothing to show for it--"

Gwen says a thing that freezes Ashley in his tracks. If it comes down to it... She's counting on him to stop her? It's awful-- she's asking him to... to kill her? If it comes down to that? And the worst thing is that he asked Marivel to promise something similar. He looks to the dough for answers.

The dough only demands to be deep-fried.

"I'm not making that promise," he says after a moment. "If it comes down to it, I'll stop you. But I'll stop you without killing you. I don't know what might be in your head, but I'll make it stop even if I have to tap into the Blazer's power to do it. There's no need to sacrifice you on the altar of <<Peace>>."

Ashley might be misunderstanding something here...!!

<Pose Tracker> Gwen Whitlock has posed.

    "I dunno. A guy like him? I think he'd get restless if he was someplace too quiet. But that doesn't mean he'd want to be always fighting. A guy like him... he'd be a good ARMsmeister. He even helped me out with my ARM, back on Lunar."

    Watching Ashley roll out the dough into rings, Gwen begins attempting to do the same. "I think it shows how much respect people on both sides had, for one another." Pause. "Well, aside from..." The giant pillar of flame. "Leon n' I locked eyes at one point, n' he didn't even seem angry that I was going up against his crew. It just was what it was."

    'I'm not making that promise.'

    "Mm?" It takes Gwen a moment to catch onto the meaning behind his words. "Whoahwhoah!" Gwen waves her hands. "Nonono, I don't need you to... oh Guardians, you thought I was askin' you to kill me?" She begins laughing in earnest, so hard that a snort bubbles up. "Oh man, oh, I'm so sorry, Ashley. I'd never ask you t'do that. Nah, my body can't be like that for very long. Just tire me out, or get me in a bearhug, or, I dunno, you might even just be able to wave your hands in front of my face n' tell me you just baked some cookies or somethin'." Still flushed from her laughing, Gwen wipes her eyes.

    The meaning behind his words is clear enough to her, evidenced by the way something in her shoulders gives way.

    "There are other people out there too. I got a lot of good friends, so, what I meant is..." She hesitates again, wiping her eyes. ".... Well, I suppose that means you n' I were on the same page to begin with. Though, if you've made that promise, I'll make the same. If things get hairy, I'll use my own powers to stop you. Without killin' you. I'll do what I can to make you remember that you're Ashley. That, or try to keep others who might be better able to remind you from gettin' hurt."

<Pose Tracker> Ashley Winchester has posed.

"Wh--" Oh no! Ashley... Ashley misunderstood! He misunderstood in a terrible, critical way! Such a mistake! Much error! WOW!! "Oh no, I didn't--" It was his brain! A manifestation of his own self-directed concern, because of course someone with something weird in their brain would need someone there to PUT THEM DOWN in case they lost control!

Ashley... Ashley just kind of forgot that not every headmate is as bad as Lord Blazer.

And so his face goes beet red, and his ears turn the color of ripe strawberries, and he looks like he's about to bury his head in a bowl of donut dough to bake it from the inside out WITH EMBARASSMENT. "Aaaaah! I can't believe I got it so wroooong!" Ashley groans, rubbing his face with his dough-covered palms. "It's me, I'm the idiot sandwich! Gaaaaaaaahhhhhh---"

It's a wound! A grievous injury... to his pride......!

But at least Gwen is laughing about it and not, you know, getting offended or anything! And she's made a very important promise, too.

"Ugggghhh I appreciate it but ughhhhh I can't believe I even-- nnaaaaahhhhhgh...!" Ashley is glad that the Blazer doesn't feed on CRIPPLING EMBARASSMENT because this would be a problem. It's a good thing he's a baker, because he sure as heck can't keep hold of any of this spaghetti...! "Blugh. I hope... I hope that you never need to worry about stopping me like that though...!"

<Pose Tracker> Gwen Whitlock has posed.

    And Gwen begins to laugh even more, because it's hard not to, looking at how well-meaning and jaw-droppingly wholesome the young man is. "Okay, okay. Hold on." She holds back a snort, and holds up her right hand. "I should explain, because it ain't like I really do that enough."

    She clears her throat. "My ARM is able to speed my senses up. Well, I think that's the best way of puttin' it. So, it ain't like with you. No one's controlling me but me. I'm just... not completely in control." It all makes sense! "... Uh, kinda like, when you're on a sugar high? But really, really high. But that form consumes a *lot* of energy, so, during one battle, I uh." She coughs. "I kinda tried to absorb some of this guy named Setanta. Well, a Primarch? Which is like a Guardian, but not a Guardian. At first, I thought they were evil, like the thing that's inside you? But after I encountered Setanta, it's like..."

    She shakes her head. "He was powerful, and didn't think anything of trying to infuse people with his powers so much that their bodies'd just give out from the strain. But he was angry, and lonely. N' just knowing that... Well, Fei was one of the people who tried to reach out to him, and when I think about that, I can't think of him as 'evil', in a primal sense. Reckless, senseless, selfish, yeah, but not evil. But apparently, because I absorbed some of his energy, I got his smell on me. What that means, I don't know. I'll be getting it purified, just in case, but it won't change the rest of everything else."

    There's suddenly a weight in the room, an elephant that Gwen chooses not to acknowledge, a secret.

    Something more than everything else she's said, or chosen to say.

    She wets her lips, and says one thing more, her eyes suddenly distant, as if gazing at Ashley from far away.

    "Setanta isn't the one to blame, if things get bad. But hopefully, they never will. And none of this will be something anyone needs to worry about."

<Pose Tracker> Ashley Winchester has posed.

Noooo the laughter of peers! The ultimate weakness of one and all! Social stigma!!

At least nobody else is around to witness Ashley's suffering. What a terrible fate he has met...!

"Oh... Oh!" Ashley realizes, which is definitely not a function of his mind trying to shove this memory firmly into the vault of forgetfulness. "So that's why you ate so many of the pastries! You were trying to recover some of the energy that you'd expended. I see! But uh... Didn't anyone ever teach you anything about not absorbing strange energy fields? I feel like there are stories about that..."

And sure enough, Gwen has one of her own. Setanta, the Primarch...!

...

Ashley just kind of looks at her with a blank stare at the comparison with the Guardians. He knows what Guardians are! Don't get him wrong! But... "Oh, um. I'm Granasian, so I don't know if I'm qualified to tell the difference between Guardian and Not Quite Guardian, but..."

IS Lord Blazer Evil?

Well, of course! He is spectacularly evil. He revels in evil, even! Sometimes Ashley hears something funny and for some reason the laughter in his brain doesn't actually stop for several minutes. Lord Blazer is the kind of evil that acts bombastic and spectacular because it knows exactly how inevitable its victory must be......

......Or so Ashley thinks. Really, he doesn't know as much about the Blazer as he aught to. It's not like they regularly sit down for a mental chat or anything like that.

Wait.

What was that thing she said?

"...Everything else?" Ashley asks, looking concerned around the donuts he crafts. "Um, is everything okay? It sounds like you've got more on your plate than a mystery arm and a pseudo-Guardian."

<Pose Tracker> Gwen Whitlock has posed.

    "Yep! That, and they were delicious." Gwen's cheeks grow red themselves, as she finally gives in and rubs her neck, getting flour there in a smeary mess. "Sleeping and eating are the best ways for me to regain my strength. It just takes a while. I've used my ARM to power things, so I've used it to try drain things, but the conversion process is too outta whack for it to be seriously attempted for reasons other than disruption, or slowin' somethin' down."

    Didn't anyone tell her not to do something like this? Didn't anyone need to?

    Her words are soft, her gaze drifting downwards. "... That was the first time I've ever done it. Or even... thought about it. It was weird. I just didn't care anymore. All I was was hungry. It was too short a timespan between the last time I used my ARM's power and then, Ida was in trouble, and Setanta was right there, so I had to--"

    Was that all? Desperation?

    "Oh, it's okay. I actually spent part of my life in a Granasian orphanage, back in Little Twister. My auntie, though, the one who gave me my ARM? She..." Her smile grows steadily strained. "... Well, she was pretty much the sort to say all of it was bunk. But yeah, my take is that the Guardians.... aren't gods, like in the same sense Granas is? Like, how the Seraphs aren't gods. They're embodiments of energy, or something like that. In Setanta's case, I got a sense, from a few off-hand words, that he was created to be somethin' that could be used towards threats like the Metal Demons, back during the first Metal Demon War, but, uh. Obviously, it was a bad idea."

    She waves her hand. "Honestly, it's nothin' you haven't helped me out already on. I feel better, just chattin' with you. I'll be okay." She plants her hands of her hips, and grins. "Now, will *you* be okay? Because I *will* follow up on my promise."

<Pose Tracker> Ashley Winchester has posed.

"...That's the first time I've ever heard of someone so hungry that they literally ate a god," Ashley says with a small amount of genuine awe. "I mean... I'm actually impressed and also kind of terrified that he didn't explode out of you? But I guess I'm not exactly one to talk."

Says the man with the Blaze of Disaster trapped inside his soul.

"That makes sense though. If they're kind of like Seraphs but bigger, then... I guess I can understand how that'd happen? I wonder, though..."

Ashley... rubs his chin... "...Clarine likes my pastries. Would a Primarch like them too...? Being a'The Only Bakery With the Guardians' Seal of Approval' would probably bring in customers, right...?"

Do the Baskar like bread......?

"Wh-- Oh! Uh. I think... so." Ashley answers, snapping out of his baker's reverie. "I mean. I'm no worse than I was before the Puppy Room. I... I really felt bad for him, you know? For Id. The sort of things that he's suffered... I can't imagine that anyone could live so many lifetimes and never experience even a little bit of warmth or kindness. It was all so painful in there... But I guess that's even more reason to talk to him!" Ashley GETS DETERMINED! "If nobody's been his friend in aeons, then I'll have to make it a point to try!"

<Pose Tracker> Gwen Whitlock has posed.

    Someone... so hungry... that they literally ate... a god

    Now it's Gwen's turn to suddenly turn bright red. "Nonoonononono, I didn't eat anyone!! The guy was way taller than I was, n' it was like tryin' to drink from a firehose. I got maybe, uh." She indicates with her thumb and index finger, pinching them together in front of her face. "A pinch of that? It was everybody else who slapped him down, n' it looked like he was dead, but apparently he isn't, because people who've dealt with other Primarchs say I smell like him now? Which is really, really rude to say to a lady because I do *not* smell like a lava pit, thank you very much, I'm very conscious about my hygiene!"

    Ex.... plode....

    "NONONONONO don't even *say* that!" Gwen waves her hands in front of her. "Please, don't even say that."

    Because she's already seen those possibilities, because that's how the blue-eyed assassin works.

    "I guess I shouldn't say Primarchs are the exact equivalent, though," Gwen resumes, calming down. "I don't know a whole lot about his deal. I honestly want to talk to him, y'know? But I know that'd put people in danger, if that invites him to take over more of me. I'm already dabbling in things I don't know about. I didn't even think this would happen."

    Ashley feels bad for Id. Gwen's expression softens. ".... Yeah, I do too. Even when I know what he's done. But I think you're wrong there. Id is.... I dunno. There's something missing with Id. He's fully human, but it's hard for him to really understand the positive emotions of people. But he does have them, because he's part of Fei. And he's done nice things, just not in great ways. He actually saved me from drowning, y'know? Okay, well, more like, I misjudged the depth of the water from a ship, n' he just... floated over and yanked me out of the water by one foot. Real embarrassing, but still!"

    She coughs. "I'd say be a friend to both Fei and Id. Maybe then, you can figure out how they're connected. I'm sure they are." She grins. "But maybe you'll be able to connect to the two of them in a way someone like me can't."

    She turns to the Donuts. "Anyway! Let's get these donuts done before I think too much about things burstin' outta me, okay?"