2021-02-12: The Legendary Cake Promise

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  • Log: The Legendary Cake Promise
  • Cast: Xantia, Gwen Whitlock
  • Where: The Thames - Mess Hall
  • Date: February 12, 2021
  • Summary: After literally years, Gwen and Xantia's Cake Promise is finally fulfilled! The accompanying discussion is actually quite serious, but I think we can all agree that cake is worth anything from heavy conversation topic to spontaneous combustion.

=========================<* The Thames - Mess Hall *>=========================

"Booze! Booze!"

Such is the rallying cry of the sailors and salvagers as they head to the Thames' mess hall following a hard day of work. The mess hall of the Thames is an open cafeteria that can house hundreds, filled with hard-working beastmen and crewmates working 'round the clock to ensure everyone's wetting their whistles and filling their bellies. As they say in the Thames: can't work on an empty stomach.

So why don't you pull up a chair and grab some grub?

BGM: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YREOhjsSvOs
<Pose Tracker> Xantia has posed.

At last, the time for a long-awaited promise to be fulfilled has arrived. And all it took was a traumatic event causing Gwen to be in one place for an extended period of time! Xantia was aware of this, she just didn't feel like she should go and be a potential bother until some time had passed since the incident. Hopefully give Gwen some time to recover, mostly considering the mental kind of recovery. Xantia knows a little bit about experiences like that - she certainly needed a little bit of time before she felt up to talking about it.

Of course, that's not how all this started. This started with Xantia showing up in the Thames's mess hall seemingly out of nowhere, setting a cake box down on the table Gwen was seated at, with a beaming smile. "Alright! Finally caught you, so now it's cake time!"

...it was the same box she'd brought in Luca, heavily scorched and on the verge of falling apart. Containing a cake that was... intact, but very charred. "...But maybe let's not actually eat this one," Xantia added sheepishly. "I figure maybe it could be some kind of memento, or something?"

FLASH FORWARD TO PRESENT TIME

Xantia has returned, freshly baked cake in tow, and seated herself across from Gwen. This cake is a bit less fancy than the one she bought in Luca, just a plain vanilla cake without any frills topped with a bit of whipped cream, but hey, cake is cake, she'll take whatever she can get in this non-bakery. She moves one of the two plates over to her side of the table, but perhaps uncharacteristically doesn't move to cut the cake right away, instead taking a moment to take a breather.

"Phew. Just in time. Any longer and it would've been two years since you suggested to catch up over cake."

Yes, of course she remembers exactly when that was. As strange a thing as it may be to say about an amnesiac, Xantia's memory has proven to be extremely good. Especially when it's about something important, like cake. But there's no blame in the statement, of course. That's just Drifter life, sometimes it takes a while for paths to cross and circumstances to be right for intentions to come to fruition.

Not being one to obfuscate what's on her mind, she proceeds to address the elephant in the room right away, too. "Sooo... I guess you've probably been asked about what happened a lot already, so if you're tired of talking about that, or you just don't want to talk about it, that's fine. But y'know, if you do, I am kiiiind of a little bit worried about what could've caused something like that to happen."

<Pose Tracker> Gwen Whitlock has posed.

        It was a miracle Gwen came out on the other end in one piece as it was. With how Gwen's body behaved and acted while in the guise of the fire demon(?), it seemed as if her former body was all but completely gone. But, as was clear immediately after the battle was over and especially now, as Gwen sat down at that table in the mess hall, her body was either never destroyed, or had regenerated completely.

        Almost. One eyebrow is smudged from an errant itch Gwen hadn't realized had messed up her drawn brows, and the rest of her hair seems to still be growing in, if the bandanna covering her head is of any indication. Her gloves are on, despite a portion of her right arm exposed from the blouse that she had bought since coming here, which is still an upgrade from the sailor's tunic shirt that fit way too loose and way too tight in the wrong places.

        "... !" Gwen startles as Xantia comes in, seemingly from thin air, to deposit a box in front of her. She looks up, grey blue eyes wide, but not too alarmed, as she immediately identifies Xantia from her warm greeting barely a moment before. "Oh hey, you didn't have t...." She knows those burn marks.

        And now, she's tearing up, pressing her hands over her mouth and nose in a sort of crying that is hard, at first, to tell if it's a happy sort of cry or a depressed sort of cry, or something in between.

        "Guardians, Xantia... You kept this cake all this time? N' you didn't eat i--" Gwen's opening the box and stops talking, seeing the charred remains. Oh, now those tears are definitely sad. "Damn it... what a waste of a good cake..." She sniffs, wiping her eyes. "Wanted t'try to communicate with you, but, it was kinda hard-- oh, you don't have to--"

        NOW

        "... It's really been two years?" Gwen, momentarily distracted by the cake, looks up. "Gosh, I really wished I could've fulfilled that promise t'you under better circumstances, but I guess, this don't mean we can't have more cake days!"

        Moving to cut the cake as Xantia rests, Gwen cuts a piece for Xantia first, getting a portion with a nice batch of whipped cream on the top to lay down on her plate. "Sometimes promises that take a little longer just get sweeter as they go along, y'know? We've used it to snap each other out of things more than once."

        This time, especially.

        And Gwen doesn't even seem to mind, as she gets her own slice.

        "It's okay," Gwen says, shaking her head. "It's one of the reasons I've been stickin' around in one place for a while. I mean, sure, it's to heal, but, you guys gotta heal too, right? What happened, n' what I put you guys through, no matter the reasons or whatever..." She trails off, unsure of how to continue, itching the side of her neck. "So, yeah, I guess... I owe you a few answers at the very least, heh."

<Pose Tracker> Xantia has posed.

Xantia sure seems to be the same as always. Phased by little, certainly not a few changes in appearance. She pretty much would've just ran right by without further comment on Gwen's condition, had it not been for the tears. She quite clearly doesn't know how to handle that, looking a little panicked when that started to happen.

"Huh? Huh?? W-why are you...?" Oh. Ohhh. Waste of a good cake, of course. That makes sense. Holding up her hands as if to say 'hang on', she assures. "Don't worry, it's okay! There were, you know, circumstances, and... hang on, I'll get another cake!"

And with that, she was off again. Looked a bit like she was fleeing there. Little of column A, little of column B. She has no idea how to comfort somebody who's crying, but she's pretty sure cakes make everything better!

And she was right! By the time she came back, no more tears. The magic of cake, she's certain.

Xantia waves a hand dismissively to the notion of fulfilling the promise sooner. "Well, sure, it would've been nice, but I get it. That sort of thing happens. If it helps, I've had lots of cake in the mean time!" Which isn't to say she isn't looking forward to this one, just short of literally mouthwatering just watching the cake being cut.

Not seeing why she should need to bother with things like forks for cake, she takes the entire slice in her hand almost as soon as it touches her plate. "And that's also true! It's always good to make promises, can't let anything get between you and keeping those!" She's about to take a big bite of the slice, before she considers something, slowly closing her mouth again to comment on that first. "Something like that happening to me was what made you promise that in the first place, and it happening to you was what made it actually happen." She didn't really have a point there, evidently she just thought that was interesting.

With a shrug, she finally takes that big bite from the cake. Judging from her happy expression afterwards, it was worth the wait. Perhaps this is why she sounds a little more cheerful than is perhaps warranted, given the serious nature of the subject at hand.

"Oh, you don't owe me anything! This just kind of makes us even, right? I wasn't in control of myself back then, you weren't in control of yourself this time... and we helped each other out the best we could! Just sounds like the kind of thing friends do to me!"

She does look pensive for a moment at that, before adding, "I guess the main thing I want to know - well, other than 'are you okay now' - is pretty much... what was it like? I mean, you said you were trying to communicate, and I could see that, but... well, something else was happening, right?" A bit clumsily worded, perhaps, but this is not exactly the most everyday topic.

<Pose Tracker> Gwen Whitlock has posed.

        "H-hey, it's okay! Just... feels bad to see that I wasn't able t'save your cake, when you were usin' it to reach out t'me. But." Gwen grins sheepishly. "I think you got a good idea, there. Though I have heard of some cuisines that set their desserts on fire. Just, not, like this, of course."

        But it is the way of Drifters. Promises made may have a lengthy time for completion, or simply add to the mythos of how a friend progresses.

        "Funny how it works out, like that," Gwen says, the dried tears adding a bit of salt to the cake as she has her first bite, opting for her fork instead of holding her slice in her hand, Xantia-style. "They have good food here. S'lot better than I've had a lotta places. Not fancy, but it don't have t'be." She pauses, cutting her next bite with her fork. "... I guess it's ok t'ask 'bout that, if you remember at all, but, like, what was that all about? If you've answered already n' I just plain forgot about it, then... consider that an indication of how secret I keep a thing or two!"

        While Gwen sticks to her fork, she digs into her slice at a quick pace, savoring each bite as she nods merrily in agreement with Xantia. It's good cake.

        It's likely one of the things that could lead to world peace, she's sure of it.

        "Yeah, true, but, like, the second part I did have some control, more or less. Kinda. I just couldn't talk, n' I needed people to get away. After what happened t'Ida, I didn't know how I could trust any movement I made, 'specially since..." The Stranger was there. There, but not there.

        If eating cake was something Gwen would associate as something that is pure Xantia, the fact that she'd ask a question like this, as earnestly as she does, would be another.

        And Gwen doesn't hesitate to answer. ".... It hurt at first. It came from the ember I absorbed with my ARM from the Primarch of fire, Setanta. For a while, I was doin' pretty good with it there, but it all turned out t'be because someone else had taken out the parts of me that'd perceive it as hot, or how scary it was. Setanta themselves turned out to be pretty swell, but kinda like...." Could she use a comparison like Xantia's friendship of sorts with Id? ".... I guess... like how you n' Id kinda get along, on some level? Maybe not exactly like that, but, Setanta's kinda like that in terms of danger. N' their loneliness... I mean, it's kinda odd? Like, the most dangerous parts of Setanta are the ones that feel the most human t'me. How prideful they are, but also, how sad..."

        She hasn't touched her cake for another bite. She's smiling, remembering those meetings, in spite of the distant look she had when she started.

        "... Someone else wanted that power I absorbed from Setanta. N' they wanted to make a statement with it, before they took it. N' all they had t' do was... give me back my fear. Everything else was just the effect that ember had on me. It was a tiny drop from Setanta, not even something they could really be aware of or control, but that was enough to do all that. Hurt a damn lot. Like bein' burned alive on the inside and out, from my toes to the top of my head. N' it was as if all I could feel was euphoria, but it was laid on top of the pain."

         She frowns. "... Sorry, t'dump all that on you. I don't think I covered even half of all that mess, but... uh..." She quiets again, looking at her half-eaten slice of cake. Her second, that is.

<Pose Tracker> Xantia has posed.

A fork just doesn't make much sense in Xantia's case. It's a slice of cake, so obviously after the first bite, she's just gonna shovel all the rest into her mouth. That's her way of savoring food. She nods with enthusiasm to the remark that they serve good food here, managing to swallow enough to only be kind of hard to understand when she replies with her mouth full. "They're nice too. Let me into the kitchen one time!"

They like taking risks too, by the sound of it. But she doesn't get into that further, taking the time to swallow the rest before she replies to the other matter, with a bit more serious a tone. "I never did get to tell you about that, huh? After you suggested it, I meant to do that over cake, but I guess that took a while to happen. So yeah, I can tell you about that now, but... you first!" She points at Gwen saying this, notices there's whipped cream on her fingers, and proceeds to clean that off in the only way that makes sense.

Xantia doesn't interrupt Gwen at any point as she relates exactly what happened. She has more cake while listening, of course, so it's difficult to keep looking as concerned as she is the entire time, but make no mistake, she's paying close attention to every word. Notably, she nods when Gwen mentions 'someone else', and pauses mid-bite when she hears Id's name, seeming to be mulling that over for a moment as the size of her planned bite is noticeably reduced.

"That's fine," is Xantia's immediate answer once Gwen falls quiet. "It's a bit hard to understand, but I imagine it's the same for you." Now, what could she actually say about all this? It's only natural where her first thoughts go.

"That's not really the same as me and Id, I mean, Id isn't in my head. ...But I get why you'd say that. The way you talk about Setanta is exactly the way I feel about Id. He's sad and lonely, too. ...But you shouldn't say that to him or you'll probably be on fire all over again." Xantia's expression remains the same as she says that, that wasn't one of her rare jokes.

She strokes her chin, quickly stopping when she notices she has whipped cream on her fingers again, needing a napkin to clean that off this time. "...I could tell someone else was there. I didn't see them, but I saw... something, that was attached to you. I tried to cut it off, but I don't know if it worked. I hope that person won't be able to do something like this again, but... well, it's probably a good idea to be careful about this sort of thing anyway. Not that I know the details, but..."

But... she's been through something much the same, hasn't she? Time to make good on her own promise and talk about that a little. It's clearly not a fun memory, but the advantage of this having taken so long is that it's a lot easier to talk about now. "It's.... different from what happened to me. I had no control at all. I could see myself doing all these things, and I tried so hard to stop it, or at least say something, but... I just couldn't. Not at first. It was only because of all of you that I could finally stop myself long enough to give you an opening."

She folds her hands in front of her on the table, staring down at them. "...I lost my memory again after that. All of it. The people closest to me, they helped bring me back, with the help of..." She frowns, then resolutely shakes her head. "Well, that doesn't matter, the important thing is that I got my memories back. The most recently lost ones, I mean. Getting everything back was too much to hope for, I guess."

She raises her head, her expression showing a measure of alarm as she finishes, "But I still don't know what took control of me, or how or why that happened when it did. What I do know is that it happened not long after I started hearing a weird sound that no one else around me seemed to hear. A weird crackling noise, like static. And, very recently... I heard that sound again."

<Pose Tracker> Gwen Whitlock has posed.

        It's definitely something about Xantia Gwen respects: she takes everything on wholly, not holding any bit of enjoyment back. While Gwen is ever the one for taking and indulging in food, especially if it's free, she holds herself back at a certain point. When Xantia is ready for her next slice, Gwen is there, cutting another for Xantia to grab in her hand. "I guess this time we get to make it equal. I say stuff, you say stuff, everything's even!" Maybe.

        Oh, she's first? Gwen chuckles, taking a slice for herself now. "I dunno if Setanta was in my head or not, come to think of it. They weren't aware of anything I did, just what I told them. It's... Man, I really shouldn't be usin' Id as an example so casually." She still hears Id's voice in her mind, from that day. The way Fei was turned into a ghastly scarecrow, his assurance that they won't make Gwen's mind a battleground.

        But isn't that... how Id does things? How he assures people? Like how Id saved her, even if it was in such a humiliating way, being lifted from the water by one leg like a soaked rat. "... So he's like that too, huh... Id is, I mean." Something in Gwen relaxes. "Setanta... I dunno. Last we met, they wanted so badly to just have contact, and friendship, and stories. They didn't like how I showed up in human form, but thinkin' 'bout it, I think it was 'cause they had to worry 'bout hurting me accidentally. But when I became fire, I could hold their hand." She looks down at her cake, fondly. "It was like meeting a friend in a place you never thought you could find one. I guess, that's a way it's sort of like how Id is, maybe, for you?"

        Another is that they may fight each other, and that they'd still be friends.

        "That was the Stranger." Gwen's reply is like a splash of cold water, blunt and sudden. "The... presence, I mean. Most likely. Unless you sensed the power's source. The Stranger... that's a term a friend of mine used for him, and it fits."

        Xantia talks about her own ordeal, and Gwen stops eating, the fork set quietly to the side of the plate so she can focus wholly on Xantia's words. "... That... makes a lot of things make sense. Why we didn't get around to that cake, for one. But it confirms that you were doin' your best to communicate to us, too. I figured that was what was goin' on, just not the hows and whys of everythin' that happened. And even after all that, you lost your memory again... and even if you got it back, you didn't get the rest of your memories." It reminds her of Loren's case, but even for Loren, the process of getting everything back was a quick process- painfully so. Trial by holy fire.

        "A weird sound, huh..." And then, Xantia says, she's heard it again.

        Gwen hasn't touched her cake at all, and this is definitely not going to change now. She considers, tapping a finger to her chin. "Huh... a weird sound, like music...?" No, that's not what Xantia said. "Er, static. Not music. Sorry. Is it like radio static? Like, when you hear things on the comm, in a Gear. Or, uh, a radio, I guess. I mean, I've heard of this one guy who got a metal filling in his teeth, and sometimes, it acted like a receiver, y'know? But that would be accidental kinda reception, n' not clear enough t'hear a crackling noise. But like, not to alarm you, but that kinda sounds like somethin' you'd hear before a signal, or somethin'." She frowns, thoughtfully. "That whole mess... y'think Fei n' Elly might have some clues? Elly, from her background, and Fei, just because he's the sort of goofy hero that'd try t'crack someone's head to force a thing out."

<Pose Tracker> Xantia has posed.

Xantia can't help but awkwardly laugh a little when Gwen says casually dropping Id comparisons into things may not be the best decision. Not something that Xantia isn't well aware of, but it tends to happen anyway. If something reminds her of Id, it's hard not to say anything. Turns out, a lot of things remind her of Id.

And yet, when Gwen speaks about Setanta seeking out contact and friendship, she can only shrug and shake her head. "I guess in that way they're the complete opposite. Not about what they want, but about how honest they are about it." That's what Xantia sees, anyway. There's plenty of proof she could point to. Case in point: "He keeps saying he'll kill me one day. But whenever we fight, he's holding back, and he's saved my life multiple times. That's just how he is, can't just say what he really wants. ...although, there may be reasons for that." But that's not for her to say. She already kind of feels like she's saying too much, but that's just how it goes once she starts talking.

And yet, after a moment of silence, she can't keep from saying one more thing on that. "...I feel like I understand Id, and he understands me. More than other people do." Her demeanor quickly brightens up, with her concluding, "So yeah, um... if that's how it is for you, maybe it's the same sort of thing!"

She doesn't have much to say on 'The Stranger', other than repeating, "The Stranger..." to herself. That doesn't tell her a whole lot. But she doesn't press the subject. After all, if she knew who was responsible for what happened to her that time she lost control, she could think of plenty of reasons why she might not want to share too much about them. It's already kind of difficult to think back to when that was happening.

"...I was shouting the whole time. But nobody heard me, because my body wasn't doing what I was telling it to do. It was so frightening. ...but somehow, I knew how to stop it. So that's what I told you, when I had the chance, for everyone to use lightning against me, all at once. I don't know why, but somehow I knew... if you did that, I might lose my memory again."

She knew what she was doing, what might happen. But she saw no other way. In the end, as much as her memories mean to her... if it comes down between that and the well-being of everyone she cares about, her choice is clear.

As for the sound, Xantia quickly points a finger to indicate 'that's it' when Gwen mentions radio static. Though she can't help but look dubious when she hears about the metal fillings. "I don't have any of those..." She shakes her head, getting back to what's important. "...But yes, I'm certain that something was calling me. Telling me to go somewhere. But I can't remember that part clearly. One thing's different than before though. Before, I couldn't even talk about hearing the sound. I tried to write it down, and I couldn't get myself to show anyone. So at that time... someone was already controlling me, in some way. But, here I am, telling you about it. So I hope that's a good sign. That either this is not what I'm afraid it is, or it's not working as well as before. ...But yeah, I'll have to talk to somebody about this, after the whole mess in Spira is over."

<Pose Tracker> Gwen Whitlock has posed.

        Hearing Xantia talk about Id in a way that Gwen's only cautiously approached at makes Gwen smile. Because she wants to believe that too. "I dunno what Fei and Id's relationship is, but if they're parts of the same whole, they must come from the same trunk. Like, two halves of the same tree." annnnddd a third one that's hidden in the dirt. Or is the trunk. But Gwen does not know this. "So, maybe, it ain't so weird to think that. Just, something with Id is different. Like, formed differently. It's just that they're so powerful, that this different forming becomes a big deal when we're havin' to tangle with him."

        Xantia may be one of the only people who could get to that understanding. Gwen can try, because she's Gwen, but--

        There's too many voids to look into, and only one pair of eyes.

        ".... I think there's too many parts of me that set Id off, when it comes down to it. But even still... well, like." She slowly fidgets in her seat, considering. "So, Fei tried to knock the whatever outta me during that fight, y'know? Only, there was nothin' to knock out of me, but even still, he connected with me mentally. I think? I was kinda a mess, eheh." She's since picked up the fork, separating a piece of spongey cake goodness, but not yet bringing it up to her mouth. "It kinda backfired. I guess I pushed him back? Because I was afraid that the Stranger might... notice him. It was near the end, so we must've both been exhausted. But that's when Id came out. He made that image of Fei become like... a scarecrow, with Fei's neck broken, to scare the crows away, as he said. He then said he wouldn't make my mind a battleground for their fight, cause Fei wouldn't like it. That image... when Fei found me later, it made me recoil away, but like..."

        "... When I hear you, I think... maybe that was Id tryin' to help me."

        She wants to think that, now.
        
        Xantia talks about her own experience, about her helplessness. Gwen closes her eyes, then stands, the chair audibly shifting back. Crossing around the table, if Xantia allows her to, Gwen places a hand on her shoulder, in order to offer a hug. ".... Can't say I know exactly what it was like, but... I don't need to know just what sorta hell that's gotta be for someone like you."

        The hug, if allowed, is only long enough, Gwen not knowing just how much Xantia would appreciate that show of closeness in that moment.

        "As for it maybe happenin' again and us zappin' you, that's gonna be a hard sell t'do again, especially if we know that's what it'll lead to." Gwen frowns. "It's too bad that--"

        _was Gwen going to say 'it's too bad that Id couldn't help' because Gwen just heard that almost come out of her mouth and thank goodness she stopped it but *still*_

        Then again, Gwen doesn't know just how Xantia was able to keep Id from interfering in the first place, and how that connected to how Fei tried to do the same with Gwen.

        "If this was a few weeks ago... I would've justified everything I did, just because it'd mean I'd have some means to keep up with you and restrain you."

        She realizes then that there's something she hadn't said to Xantia, just then, but she keeps quiet on it. "Only if you're sure, Xantia. Don't make the same mistake as me. If you think you need to take a break from any of it, I'm gonna be here." Gwen gives an awkward laugh. "Cause... I think I'm gonna stay away from alla that for right now. If people figure out I'm in any way connected to what happened in Luca, that's gonna complicate things for you. Plus... I'm.... not ready."

        Which is a big thing for Gwen to ever say, when it comes to being involved in things bigger than her.