2021-07-13: Turns Out, You Can't Just Kill All Your Problems
- Log: Turns Out, You Can't Just Kill All Your Problems
- Cast: Pearl, Kaguya
- Where: Mt Gagazet
- Date: July 13, 2021
- Summary: After a difficult conversation with the White Knight, Pearl finds herself in another difficult conversation with Kaguya. Perhaps they both have changed from when they came to an agreement.
<Pose Tracker> Pearl has posed.
It was Pearl who had walked away from the cave she and Leo had occupied for the last hour or so. Seemingly alone, as Leo Jr had rolled in there a few minutes ago. Seemingly. But even if she got the drop on him, anyone would have heard the fight between the two from there.
Once again she's looking to be by herself it seems. She's not succeeding at it, but she's trying. She walks through the caves- but not her usual calm self. She seems shaken. A bit exhausted, both mentally and physically after the climb and everything. She finds a small alcove, out of the way, and leans against the wall- only to slide down it and come to rest in a sitting position. She reaches into her pack, and pulls out a blanket- green and black tartan- and wraps it around her legs and torso. Next she pulls out some kind of Spiran fish jerky, and tears a chunk off before shoving it into her mouth. It's been a while since she's eaten, and it's hard to start a fire in a cave with no trees. So, simple, travel rations are the way to go. It's... fine.
She looks down at her feet, for the moment. "I wonder," she muses- again, seemingly to no one- "should I have told him? Or kept quiet?"
<Pose Tracker> Kaguya has posed.
Kaguya doesn't always sleep so well herself--she should rightly be curled up in a tent right about now, but she isn't. Whatever she heard or didn't hear, it didn't draw her out immediately. No, instead as the night drags on, Pearl will find in short order: she isn't alone. Because...
"Hard to say," she says. "But once you tell something you can't un-tell it." A beat, "I haven't been listening in for long, I just heard that part."
Kaguya, dressed in Guard tabard over Veruni armor, steps into the small cavern, steps around to another part of the cave wall and leans against it, crossing her arms and looking over Pearl. "...Figured we should talk. Seems like a bad time for you but we're not gonna get a better time anytime soon."
<Pose Tracker> Pearl has posed.
Pearl reacts to Kaguya's voice with surprise- which says volumes about Pearl's mental state right now. Ever alert, ever vigilant, now she seems slightly startled and off guard. She looks up at the Veruni, and then glances down in thought. "That is... true." She pauses. "Thought that is arguably all there is to hear, Duchess Alathfar."
Pearl doesn't stand- and she doesn't offer Kaguya the fish- but she does look up again, as Kagya speaks. "I suppose that is fair." She doesn't argue with Kaguya, not since what happened in Meria Boule so many months ago. Even if she had had to push Kaguya to get to that point. It's true, it's not a good time for her, but. "...Very well. Where do you wish to begin?"
<Pose Tracker> Kaguya has posed.
"Oh, yeah?" Kaguya answers about that being all there is to hear. She tilts her head, looking Pearl up and down again; she notices the way she's surprised, the way she seems startled, off-guard. It's something notable. So Kaguya takes up her perch leaning on the wall, which doesn't exactly make her tower over Pearl anyway, slouching as she is and short as she is to begin with.
"We don't exactly have a 'what's on your mind' sort of relationship so I guess I'll just start with the obvious. You became a Summoner. That's... a pretty big thing. I knew you faked the training, but I didn't know you'd actually managed it. So..."
"What's with that?"
<Pose Tracker> Pearl has posed.
Kaguya speaks plainly and Pearl nods. She's right. Things are more adversarial than that. *Because you tried to kill her. And you were a feral beast.* She takes a breath, are freezing as she breathes out. "The training is more to prepare a Summoner for the Pilgrimage. What to do in a cloister, how to perform a sending. But not everyone has the potential to become a Summoner. It's something you're born with."
It seems obvious, but Pearl states it anyway. "It seems I was born with it. When I had infiltrated Bevelle the second time, the Fayth of Leviathan was there, and a Summoner named Belize took em to pray before them. And I heard them." She takes another moment to pause, and eat. After she swallows, she speaks again.
"And they saw a flash of who I was, and I retreated. After the war ended, however, I heard of a lone Summoner near Home, maintaining a shrine. So I went there, and I met Belize again. And they let me commune with the Fayth." She moves a hand to her staff, but it's clearly not in an aggressive way. More for support. "And I bared my soul to them, and they to me. They saw what I was fighting, and they mocked me at first, but they decided my cause worthwhile, if I aided with theirs. They deemed me worthy." A quiet sigh. "That's what's... 'with that'."
<Pose Tracker> Kaguya has posed.
Kaguya, of course, continues to speak plainly--she doesn't lower her guard around Pearl as such, but she doesn't seem to begrudge her much either. She even listens to what she says about the training. "Born with, huh? Guess you were. That's interesting--makes me wonder what it 'takes', but..." She shakes her head. "Science brain, not now, I guess."
"...So the fayth figured out who you were, huh? Belize..." Kaguya nods. "I remember them. Interesting person."
Kaguya--either because she is unconcerned with Pearl's strength entirely or because she recognizes the lack of aggression--doesn't so much as move a beat at the movement to the staff.
"Bared your soul, huh... That's heavy stuff. But a deal, that makes sense."
Kaguya lets it roll in her mind a little. "So you're still out to kill the asshole, right? How do you plan to do that if you die to Sin?"
<Pose Tracker> Pearl has posed.
Pearl nods. "I can't say I expected it either. I assume no one from Meribia or Glenwood would be able to. But if Le- if the White Knight is descended from Ronso, it is not unreasonable to imagine the bloodline exists there as well. Lady Yuna is the child of a High Summoner, after all. But that is all a guess." She's curious herself, curious about a family she might have never known. *As though you could be anyone important.*
Pearl nods. "When you commune with the Fayth... you can't hide anything from them. At least that is how it felt." And Pearl was GOOD at that. "Yes. A deal." She pauses, and Kaguya asks the question, and Pearl nods. "That is dealt with. Leviathan held up their end of the bargain." Pearl takes a shot at predicting the next question.
"Three weeks and six days ago the Master of the Shadow Dragon Cult died." Specific timing. Same day as someone else, give or take a few hours.
<Pose Tracker> Kaguya has posed.
"Yeah, that makes sense. If it's a bloodline thing it could be on the other continents too, since the people here originally came from over there. Common ancestor, or whatever. Without more data it's hard to say anything more than maybe, though." Pause. She does notice that Pearl called him 'Leo' for a moment there. Not that she doesn't do it herself, but...
"Guess that makes sense. 'Communing' isn't big on privacy." She shakes her head. "No thanks, no need for me. But uhh..." Pause. It's dealt with. Yes, Kaguya wonders about that. "And here I was gonna offer to do some more training. But uh..."
"Three weeks, six days." Kaguya considers that--there has to be a reason she's so specific about it. And so she thinks back; three weeks, six days ago...
"...You're not gonna tell me Lunn died heroically helping you take down the Shadow Dragon Master along with your Aeon, are you."
Kaguya stares forward for a moment--she can't be certain but that's sure what it's pointing to. And that's a heavy revelation itself. "Man. Marivel told me there was some shady shit in the Guard but the Shadow Dragon? I mean, I guess I knew it'd infiltrated but going that high..."
She doesn't have sentimentality to blind her--or faith to stop her drawing the darker conclusions.
<Pose Tracker> Pearl has posed.
The silver haired martial artist looks down at her hands. "...I do not think I could offer you a decent sparring partner right now anyway." Another deep breath. "I would be using the style he beat into me, or the style he made me learn to hamper my growth. Neither sits well." That's a huge change in Pearl, obviously, but would explain why she's only fought with magic since.
"...I am not. He died to torrents of water and a knife to the heart." She's not sure how public the cause of death was, but it helps in her mind to confirm she did. "There is a rot. I am a symptom." *As though you didn't cause more rot yourself.* I just do not know if Lunn was the cause." A pause. Kaguya is not a believer either. "I wonder if the Goddess was oblivious, or if she knew the whole time." A thought she could not raise to others.
And then, she realises what she has said. "I have only told a few people now. Yourself. Hiro and Jean. And the White Knight of course..." She looks particularly concerned as she raises that one.
*You gave him two betrayals for the price of one, right after Heldalf. Why not tell him about Kaguya and go for the hat trick?*
<Pose Tracker> Kaguya has posed.
"It's cold as ass up here anyway, I don't feel like doing a lot of exercise." She waves her hand vaguely as if to dismiss the idea for that reason alone. But that... is a huge change in Pearl, and Kaguya recognizes it after her sass, tilting her head again to look her over. "Huh. Yeah."
"Well." Pause. "Good," Kaguya answers first. "I'm glad. He sounded like a major asshole who the world is better off without. I didn't know him well as Lunn, but going around kidnapping kids..." She shakes her head, righting her posture. "Guess you are. But you're also one of the cures, apparently." Pause. The cause...
"I wonder," Kaguya says. "Did she keep him around because she needed his power? Or did she just not know? I'm not sure which is worse."
"Hiro and Jean, that makes sense. They'd need to know. But Leo.." She winces. "Ouch. I bet he didn't take it well. Knowing the man you'd fought with and been a 'Hero' with was like that..."
Pause. "Oh, I guess that means he knows about you, too. Guess that's pretty rough on him, huh? Just a load of Bad."
"Well, if he decides to punish you for it, I'll help you get out. What I taught you sounds like it isn't what helped you kill your Master, so helping you get away with it sounds like a fair enough substitution to me."
<Pose Tracker> Pearl has posed.
Kaguya is the first person to have explicitly said it's a good thing. But Pearl seems put at ease by the comment, despite herself. "Yes. His death is a boon. But he still has followers." What, Pearl unable to just take the win? Yeah. Seems accurate. "Am I? With what I've done?" Pearl's looking at nothing in the distance as she speaks.
"Neither is a good outcome. But what so called Goddess, if she has such power, would allow people such as me to exist?" She shakes her head. "Another reason I shouldn't be here, with the rest of you." Pearl shakes her head, like trying to shake off a bad thought.
And then she looks down again, trying to avoid Kaguya's gaze. "Yes. It hurt him deeply." She pauses. "I saw him reach for his sword when I told him what I had done. But he held his nerve, as he promised he would. I do not think Leo is a man who would cut me down from behind." When she looks back up at Kaguya, there is emotion on Pearl's face, some mix of distaste for herself and... maybe hope? "...At least, I hope he is not that sort of man."
And then Kaguya catches her off guard again. "You would do that?" She doesn't need to ask the reason, as Kaguya explains, but she seems cautious still. "You owe me no such kindness. I have ill-served as your agent."
<Pose Tracker> Kaguya has posed.
"True. ...But not you." Kaguya shrugs. "People aren't a balance sheet. You did at least one good thing. You could make it more, if you wanted. Or not. What you're going to do is at least as important as what you have done." Pause. "...'Course, if I don't think you can do something worth doing even after doing some messed-up stuff, I'm in trouble too, aren't I?"
Neither is a good outcome. "I dunno--honestly, I dunno what kind of 'power' a Goddess is supposed to have. If she can bring back the dead, but can't read minds, is that still a 'Goddess'? I think so." But she can't say whether Pearl should be here--that's up to Pearl, really. But...
Kaguya doesn't bother trying to force eye contact; if Pearl wants to look away, Kaguya will look away too, though she doesn't leave Pearl out of her peripheral vision. "Yeah, he keeps his promises. If he goes for you, he's gonna go for you from the front. That much is definitely true."
Kaguya seees the emotion as she looks back, noticing Pearl look back at her. But then--
"Doesn't matter. We made a deal. So yeah, I would. ...If it makes you feel better," Kaguya says, "It's less that I think I owe you and more that I want to be the sort of person who keeps up her end of a bargain."
"...Besides. The Pearl who agreed to kill people for me wouldn't have given even half a shit that she'd hurt the White Knight, but you do."
<Pose Tracker> Pearl has posed.
Pearl seems to take in Kaguya's words, but she still seems hesitant. "Is it that simple?" Of course, Pearl is struggling with the concept that people can be better. Or that she can be better. She doesn't comment on Kaguya's own thoughts.
"He is a good man. Or he does his best to be." *So why would he have anything to do with you?* But she pauses. "...I see." Another question raises. "But have I held up my end?" It's hard for her to feel she has. Or what would she expect of her now? She blinks, though, at Kaguya's last words. "...I suppose that is true." Had she really changed so much? *Or are you just fooling yourself?*
And then a chill goes down Pearl's spine. It hadn't occurred to her but... but after the Dragonmaster... "Would she?" She asks, not immediately giving context. But she seems to be suppressing panic. Panic and fear. "Would she bring Him back?"
<Pose Tracker> Kaguya has posed.
"Depends who you ask. But I for one am not ready to give up yet. Are you?"
Kaguya has a way of boiling things down to simpler matters; it serves her well sometimes, and not other times, but in this case, maybe it is 'well'. "He is. Or yeah, at least he tries. Not like you or me. ...But maybe sometimes he can be good because the people around him aren't. ...Don't tell him that, though." Obviously.
But Pearl--Pearl doesn't give context, but she doesn't have to--the context is fairly clear from her emotional reaction, and Kaguya turns to look at Pearl properly. Pearl is not exactly easy to read, but...
"If she were going to," Kaguya ventures, "She probably would've by now. I know 'probably' isn't exactly ironclad, but it doesn't seem like something she does all the time, either. She's only done it with Ghaleon that I know of, and well I mean..."
"He's Ghaleon. Guy's nuts powerful."
<Pose Tracker> Pearl has posed.
That's the key question, isn't it? An important one. "...I am not." That answer comes quickly, much more quickly than she expected. Kaguya does have a way of boiling things down. But she pauses at what she says about Leo. " Perhaps it is true. He is not suited to the shadows. Few of them are." Who 'they' are is obvious, of course. The Guard. "It's part of what made it so easy." Maybe they do need people like Kaguya and Pearl- to guard against Kaguya and Pearl. But Pearl still doesn't have a place here. Not right now, the heretic is she is. After all, she's one of the things Althena waged war on.
"I hope you are right." It's not soothing, but it's... it seems to stop the immediate fear. "Yes. The Dragonmaster is a force to be reckoned with." She had no strategy for him. Beyond 'die in the attempt'. "Hopefully he is not part of the rot. I would not want to have to face him."
<Pose Tracker> Kaguya has posed.
"Yeah. All these honorable knights and noble healers..." Kaguya trails off dramatically with a lift of her hand as if to show the expansiveness of the other Guard. "I can play at honor a little but it's a hat I put on. I'm not really like them, though it's nice to be included." But Pearl... is still a heretic. That's true. Kaguya may not be particularly religious, but she can toe the line. Pearl...
"If I'm wrong, just let me know. Same deal as before. You don't have to attack me first this time, though."
Pause. "That would suck, a lot. But nah. I don't know what game Ghaleon is playing, but it's not... That."
Kaguya pushes off the wall at this point. "But all right then. For our arrangement... If you wanna keep learning I'll keep teaching, but I've found..."
"I don't really need an assassin that much. Turns out you can't just kill all your problems. Go figure."
<Pose Tracker> Pearl has posed.
Pearl doesn't laugh- she's not sure she's even capable of it, to be truthful- but she does let out a small, frail smile. "I wonder what it is like to have had an upbringing that allowed for honour, instead of survival." A very frail smile indeed, as it fades already."
"Thank you, Duchess Alathfar. I appreciate it" But hopefully she won't be needed. "For both of your offers." She pauses, but nods. "...Yes. The Dragonmaster is a hard man to understand, let alone comprehend his inner thoughts." She will have to hope he is at least indifferent to them.
As Kaguya pushes off the wall, Pearl looks up at it. "...I would appreciate that. I would like to know more than I have been taught." She pauses. "At least something less... " It's hard to describe the Shadow Dragon style. Well, no, it's easy. Evil. But she's hesitant to say the word.
"No. But some of them, there is no other way." The Summoner takes a pause and breathes. "May we have the wisdom to identify those that are... and not to mistake those that aren't." She looks down. That would be a worse sin.