2022-03-21: The Runaway Hit

• Log: 2022-03-21: The Runaway Hit
• Cast: Xander Lovell, Riley Arwell
• Where: Harmonde
• Date: March 21, 2022
• Summary: Riley has dragged Xander out to enjoy the local nightlife and the song playing at this bar seems a little... familiar.

<Pose Tracker> Riley Arwell has posed.

Things are still good. Perhaps they have been good for too long? It's a thought that can't help but creep into the back of Riley's mind fairly often, these days. When is the last good moment they get going to be? Will they make it through another round with the curse or could any second bring a sudden prick of pain that will turn out to signal the final end of their happiness? Ha ha ha, yes, good times!
 
Anyway, life is short -- particularly for the Fangs, and that is Riley's justification for dragging Xander to a bar in the seaside town of Harmonde. It's a great place! (for Riley). There is good seafood, drinks, even someone performing live music. Probably way too many people around for Xander's liking, but when are there not too many people for Xander's liking?

Riley is happily soaking up the atmosphere (and several apple and strawberry-based cocktails) and reflecting on his good and ill fortune in turn.

"You haven't been feeding the garden for me in secret, have you?" he accuses Xander fondly.

<Pose Tracker> Xander Lovell has posed.

Drinking isn't Xander's favorite, mostly because it usually involves a loud place with a lot of people in it. Formerly, he wouldn't have hated the concept -- Xander might have been shy, but he used to like people around him. Reminders the world was active. Alive.

Now, he dreaded the moment he'd lash out and sink his knife into someone. Anticipated it, felt it before it happen, tasted it. Heartbeats. Too many of them. Xander's grip around his drink tightened to still the tremor of his hand. His throat bobbed with a thick swallow. The curse hadn't advanced on them yet. He wasn't going to lose it. Not tonight.

Breathe. Relax. Think of something else. Seafood. Xander liked seafood. And music. There was music. He could think about that.

With any luck, he'll keep enough of an eye on himself not to drink himself into a headache or worse. This should not have been a problem except that 'too much to drink' in Xander terms could be reached by finishing his drink at all. As it was, his skin had already flushed a shade pinker part of a glass in.

It took a moment for Riley's accusation to reach him. "Mm? No." He paused. "...Do you want me to?"

It's not the kind of question he'd ask point blank under normal circumstances.

<Pose Tracker> Riley Arwell has posed.

"I..." Riley's mouth hangs open for a moment, as he seriously considers Xander's question. "It somehow seemed to work when you were being a lake monster, but I worry our bad luck would catch up to you eventually... probably with interest." He frowns, looking down. "And as long as you're doing things that hurt your heart, I want to be doing them too."

Meanwhile, the song being played is distractingly catchy, exactly to Riley's tastes. It doesn't go along with this conversation at all, but he finds it pulling at his attention.

"I wonder if I should go talk to the performer later, this is really..."

I thought you could heal anything, but could you mend this broken heart
I’ve seen the world we dreamed about, but there’s no magic when we’re apart

"...Oh no." He likes it so much because he wrote it.

<Pose Tracker> Xander Lovell has posed.

Xander studies Riley's reaction, noting the hesitation in it. He should have, he thinks. He always should have been doing it in secret. Keeping Riley's hands clean. Last time, Riley had gone off and done it himself, because Xander had proved so useless and so hopeless despite all his foolhardy promises. Riley's declaration to the contrary only makes Xander's chest squeeze with the notion that maybe Xander really should.

"It doesn't hurt," he says, so quiet it's barely audible in the noisy atmosphere, and maybe he's only trying to convince himself.

Part of the noise is the music. And maybe Xander's had too much to drink, because Riley mentions it's really... something, and a word automatically falls out of Xander's mouth:

"Familiar."

Which isn't right, because Xander's never heard this song before, but there's a certain something in it nagging at the back of his thoughts as not-entirely-foreign. Huh.

... There's something familiar about the lyrics, too. He's definitely never heard this song before. Its the sentiment behind it that digs deep into his memories. Well, he figures, in this world there's probably more experiences people have to relate to in one another then they don't, but...

Oh no.

Xander sets his gaze on Riley, chin in hand and drumming over his own lips with the rhythm of the catchy song. He doesn't say anything, letting the verses continue one more damning line after the next, each making his expression harden further with suspicion.

<Pose Tracker> Riley Arwell has posed.

Do you know a surgery to heal the hole you left behind?
Can you brew some alchemy that would redirect my mind
From thoughts of you?
Doctor, is there hope for me?
Can I live without your smile...?

Riley's increasingly red complexion is perhaps the most damning evidence of all. He smiles nervously as he feels Xander's eyes upon him.

"So you know how I sometimes perform in places like this to make money when I'm traveling...? It seems like I might be a little famous!"

If you never loved me, can you tell me what my life was for?

"...And our 'breakup' might... also be a little famous."

<Pose Tracker> Xander Lovell has posed.

Much as Xander would love to stare a stoic hole into Riley, his face starts to twitch each time he processes another lyric.

When it becomes too much, his expression transforms into a grimace, and he throws back a heartier gulp of his drink. His glass hits the table with an audible clink and a slosh of liquid that almost escapes past the rim.

Now he definitely has a headache.

"I see that," he finally says, rubbing his forehead and casting his eye back onto Riley. "You had a lot to say about me. In public. Loudly. Presumably repeatedly."

Something else starts to twitch in his lips. "...You really played it up, too."

It is music, after all. Poetry. Xander supposes it's allowed to be extra intense in its sentiments... if it were about literally anyone else but him.

<Pose Tracker> Riley Arwell has posed.

"At least I was calling you 'doctor' instead of using your name..." Riley offers, still wearing an awkward smile. In this song, anyway.

...You really played it up, too.

Riley feels embarrassment rising for an entirely new and unexpected reason. "Played it up??"

Does Xander think he didn't really feel that way -- that he was exaggerating for drama? Of course, he was younger. And the lyrics are dramatic enough to embarrass even someone as chronically melodramatic as Riley is today.

But they were genuine.

But maybe it's not surprising that Xander would think he was 'playing up' his feelings for him. He took Xander's eye. Shortened his life. Made him a murderer. And recently started trying to kill him. Riley is Xander's worst enemy, by any reasonable account.

He probably sounds pretty absurd when he claims to love him. Maybe it is absurd to think his feelings mean anything outside his own head.

Riley slouches down in his seat, falling into an uncharacteristic silence as he seeks solace in the remnants of his drink.

<Pose Tracker> Xander Lovell has posed.

"Small mercies," Xander grunts.

Living without smiles, the lack of purpose, a sense of being injured in a way that was never going to heal... Those were all supposed to be his lines.

Xander spent three years withering away. He can't recall a day where he didn't think of Riley. Always wondering where he was. If he'd come back, or if he was even alive on Xander's darkest days. Even an attempt to move on had been something he was pressured into, breaking it off once reaching his limit while being begged to stay, asked if he honestly preferred having nothing if he couldn't have Riley.

He'd answered yes without having to think about it.

It's difficult to imagine Riley suffering the same lovelorn misery... right up until Xander watches Riley sink into silence. (Maybe he just never wanted to imagine it, carrying through some days on the thought Riley was, at least, living his best life.)

"H-Hey," Xander protests, like he wasn't the one to put Riley there. "...It's not a bad song." He looks away, and if his face weren't already red from drinking, it'd be heating up now for other reasons. Then he huffs, letting the admission be more honest if it'll perk Riley back up: "It's a good song. ...Probably better when you sing it."

<Pose Tracker> Riley Arwell has posed.

Riley huffs out a small laugh and manages a half smile, looking at Xander sidelong. "Do you want me to sing it for you later?"

Teasing Xander is one way to cheer himself up, even if is probably at total cross purposes with trying to convince himself or Xander that his love is genuine. He's gotten good at falling into the comfort of these exchanges and pretending away his transgressions.

And despite the darkness creeping into Riley's head, there is no denying that Xander struggling to admit he likes the song to get him out of his sulk is very cute.

<Pose Tracker> Xander Lovell has posed.

The tension in Xander eases when Riley's laughing and back to something of a smile. It's short lived when the consequence of lifting Riley's mood drops. Xander tears his gaze away with the teasing, trying to take another sip, but underestimating how much he's already had. He ends up not tipping the glass far enough to get a drink, and hopes no one else -- Riley, mainly -- noticed that he failed such a simple task.

At first, the only response he manages is an annoyed tsk. But he wonders, suddenly, what it would be like if Riley did sing this one with that strange new magic that reaches into the soul. He isn't sure there's any result of that he would survive. He's at least half sure he deserves it either way.

But irritation crawls under Xander's skin between the song and Riley not managing a full smile under the circumstances.

Xander slides closer. At least a little of that drink is buzzing in his skull because he doesn't check to see if anyone's watching, and he doesn't second guess himself being in a crowd as he leans in, pressing his fingers against Riley's chest before letting his palm fall against Riley's heart.

"That depends. Do you still want me to mend it?"

<Pose Tracker> Riley Arwell has posed.

Alas, Xander's failed sip has been witnessed by Riley and filed away in the secret place where all of Xander's endearing behaviors go. It offers a further lift to Riley's spirits, and his smile tugs higher.

That depends. Do you still want me to mend it?

Xander presses a hand to Riley's chest. Riley is still in a vulnerable enough place that his heart goes ba-dump even more than it would have ordinarily in such a moment. There's a flicker of uncertainty in his expression as the guilt roils. But there is Xander offering to mend his heart, how can he turn away from such a thing....!

He closes his eyes. "You already mended it by being with me again. But there is always room for improvement..."

<Pose Tracker> Xander Lovell has posed.

Something that could almost be defined as amusement crosses Xander's face with the flutter of Riley's heart under his hand. It gives him a sense of retribution, fueled further by the uncertainty Riley reacts with.

...Even if the grim thought in the back of his mind is that 'played up' or not, maybe Riley would still prefer to forget the things that have happened since their reunion -- Xander included. Riley may have been the one to tangle their souls, but Xander was the one who penned out their new, terrible contract in the blood of everything they knew. Mending Riley's heart in earnest might mean stitching up the hole as if Xander had never been there instead of permanently scarring it with himself. Once, Xander would have conceded to that.

"You should know," Xander says, his tone unclear about its distinction between flirtatious or threatening as he curls his fingers into Riley's shirt, tugging closer, "I don't intend to let you forget about me."

Not anymore.

<Pose Tracker> Riley Arwell has posed.

Ba-dump, ba-dump.

Riley's attention is fully diverted away from his gloom by this mildly threatening overture, and his eyes linger on Xander's with anticipation.

But Xander's words do tug him from that momentary reverie.

"Xander, I would never forget you."

Maybe his feelings are exaggerated, or selfish, or false, or insincere when you compare them to what love is really supposed to be, but the song should be proof enough that Xander was not forgotten.

<Pose Tracker> Xander Lovell has posed.

Xander convinced himself once it was a fair and noble thing to pine from a distance, out of the way and unobtrusive. Now he wants to carve his place into Riley's life and demand to be acknowledged. It's not soft or sweet anymore, but if Xander were concerned about wrongness, there's so much more he needs to let go off.

He won't, and he doesn't, giving a small, satisfied smile with Riley's words before closing the remaining distance for a kiss, uncharacteristically having forgotten the atmosphere around them.

"You may still have to learn to live without my smile, though," Xander says, intending an almost joke based on grim truths... oblivious to the smile he is still wearing.

<Pose Tracker> Riley Arwell has posed.

Riley lets himself be lost in that kiss, and quietly enjoys the victory of Xander having forgotten to be self conscious in public. He brings his hands up to cradle Xander's head behind his ears, threading his fingers into his hair, and holding them there even as they pull away again.

"You still smile sometimes, " Riley says. "Your smiles have just become rare and precious. I'm trying to learn how to cultivate them."

<Pose Tracker> Xander Lovell has posed.

"Good luck with that," Xander huffs. When he tries to reflexively look away, his head's held, and he lacks the motivation to push against the resistance.

This is good because it prevents him from recognizing that there are, in fact, other people around (almost none who would be watching them, but since when has Xander ever been willing to accept that?). It is also terrible, because he's stuck with the eye contact.

I did love you, he almost says, but finds his tongue too heavy. Riley already knows. It'd only be picking at a scab to say it. On different edges of the world, Xander withering into a shell of himself and Riley singing breakup songs. Breakup. It had felt like that back then, even if they were never together. But they were also rarely apart.

"So," he starts instead, eye narrowing a little, "How many more of these should I prepare myself for?"

<Pose Tracker> Riley Arwell has posed.

Good luck with that.

"I'm doing better than you might think," Riley says. He can think of a couple of Xander smiles he's seen recently. It helps that he counts the ominous ones, too. But it might be asking for too much to hope that Xander's felt any real happiness since... that day. Riley tries not to let his own smile wither at the thought.

How many more of these should I prepare myself for?

"Mmm, well, we were apart for three years...so... there's quite a few..." He gives an apologetic smile that doesn't quite seem apologetic at all, then offers by way of consolation, "I'm sure they didn't all catch on, though."

<Pose Tracker> Xander Lovell has posed.

"The one you asked for doesn't count," Xander chides, as if that were the only one at all. A miserable, painful one that didn't even quite fit Riley's requirements. His voice falls into a reluctant mumble. "...They're not that important, anyway."

Just because he isn't smiling doesn't mean parts of his heart haven't been mended, either. Others break. Shattered. It shouldn't have been the price, but it was. And that's... fine. With guilt, it feels more fine every new morning they manage to wake up to.

Riley can feel Xander tensing under his grip as he makes hi admission. Three years worth of songs. Xander's seen -- heard -- how fast Riley can spin a whimsical thought into an entire ballad in a terrifyingly short amount of time. (Terrifying now only because of the context.)

"You know how good your music is, right?" Xander says, the panic in his eye completely unguarded.

<Pose Tracker> Riley Arwell has posed.

Riley nods in solemn agreement when Xander tells him the one smile Riley requested earlier doesn't count. That one was, indeed, Wrong somehow, in a way even Xander's would-be-menacing smiles are not. At least when Xander is trying to threaten him, Riley has reason to believe Xander is having fun somewhere in his heart.

You know how good your music is, right?

Riley releases him to laugh happily at this terror-stricken compliment. He gives Xander's hand a pat. "You'll survive somehow. Probably."

Actually he won't, and it will be Riley's fault when he dies, but at least Riley can be reasonably sure that embarrassment won't be the thing that kills him in the end.

<Pose Tracker> Xander Lovell has posed.

Xander is, on the other hand, aware Riley is coming for his life once the garden reaches where they agreed, and if he didn't know better, he'd swear Riley intends to wield embarrassment as his weapon of choice. It might work better than some of his poisons.

And it might hurt less, he thinks somewhere in the back of his mind and then destroys the thought. That's all a problem for a later time while Xander greedily takes what he can now.

... Even if he is dying a slow, painful death of embarrassment as they speak.

"If my name is in any of these, Riley, I swear--" And like he so often does, he cuts himself off with a growl, hoping Riley's imagination is better than whatever bullshit bluff Xander can come up with when he's too flustered to sort through his thoughts.

Just a moment ago he felt like he had some control of this situation. Where did it all go?!

He grumpily crosses his arms to turn away in a rough half whirl, then fumbles to get his drink, then fails to successfully sip it a second time because he didn't learn from the last time that it's not full enough for such meager tilts. Red in the face, he slams it back down.

Without realizing it, Xander's fingers drum against his arm again. But he notices. His brow twitches. He realizes something newly terrible.

This song is going to be stuck in his head.

"...Why did you have to make it so catchy?!"

<Pose Tracker> Riley Arwell has posed.

"Fortunately your name doesn't rhyme with a lot of things, but..." That's only an impediment to putting it at the end of a rhyming line. "...it may have ended up in a few of them."

Xander fails to sip his drink again and is twice as embarrassed about it the second time. Riley is thriving. He has forgotten all his sorrows.

...Why did you have to make it so catchy?!

"Maybe on some level I was dreaming of the day it would find us again after we'd realized it was all a terrible mistake and somehow gotten together anyway," he says, with a silly smile. And then, just to make it a little bit worse, he starts singing along a little.

<Pose Tracker> Xander Lovell has posed.

"Songs don't have to rhyme!" Xander protests. He knows Riley usually prefers it -- and that is a large factor in catchiness -- but it doesn't mean he's willing to trust Riley's never broken the rules. Riley seems to enjoy unexpected outcomes too much for that! (Also, that other end line thing he's too keyed up to list!)

He can only groan at Riley's words, because even Xander can't deny that if, somehow, Riley's song had found its way to him, if he'd realized the misunderstanding, very little would have been able to stop him from hunting down Riley personally.

But then Riley... sings along.

Oh no. Oh no, no no no. Xander feels his hair stand on end. It's possible some of it on his hair actually fluffs up. "Riley --" he hisses in impotent warning, "--don't you dare."

He dares. He is already daring. It is already too late.

"...It is better when you sing it," Xander growls, like this physically pains him to say. (Maybe because it does.)

<Pose Tracker> Riley Arwell has posed.

Riley is not singing along very loudly -- a little under speaking volume. But when Xander growls that his version is better than the performer's, Riley smiles serenely and leans against him so he is depositing the vibrations directly into Xander.

There may or may not be magic sending his sentiments in as well, but the ultimate effect is probably the same either way.

<Pose Tracker> Xander Lovell has posed.

Riley's quiet singing voice is as familiar as his open one, each powerful in different ways. Literally powerful now, but it actually does not make a single difference. There are some emotions Xander's always been able to feel from Riley's music before magic and tangled souls ever factored into it. This is one of them.

But direct vibrations are the worst. Xander tenses, growling, then heaves out a sigh with as subtle shift he can manage to settle and keep Riley from slipping off.

"Fuck you," he says through grit teeth, "I am going to throw you into the ocean."

His words are intense, but lack venom. It is exactly the same tone he speaks about certain varieties of small monsters he's not supposed to approach...

<Pose Tracker> Riley Arwell has posed.

Fuck you. I am going to throw you into the ocean.

Riley finishes with his music-based torture, and plants a small kiss upon the top of Xander's head.

"This is an unconventional healing approach, but I am willing to try it if you think it will help.."

<Pose Tracker> Xander Lovell has posed.

"It will be healing for me."

Xander crosses his arms, grumpily enduring the kiss.

"I have something different in mind for you."

<Pose Tracker> Riley Arwell has posed.

I have something different in mind for you.

"Something specific? Exciting... I can't wait to find out..." Even if Xander intends to heal his heart menacingly, he has a feeling he will enjoy it.

<Pose Tracker> Xander Lovell has posed.

"Later," Xander says.

Pause.

"I need my surgery tools, after all."

His tone gives no indication he's joking, but then it never has.

<Pose Tracker> Riley Arwell has posed.

Riley begins to laugh, with only the slightest nervous edge to it.

It's the mild undercurrent of fear that makes it fun!