2017-07-27: Dolphins Are Jerks

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  • Log: Dolphins Are Jerks
  • Cast: Avril Vent Fleur, Claude C. Kenny, Dean Stark, June Lim Ze
  • Where: Lacour - Arms Coliseum
  • Date: July 27th 2017
  • Summary: A makeshift crew takes on the trials that the Exhibition Team Fighting event has to offer, and discovers many important facts about dolphins.

=======================<* CHALLENGE - The Legal Waiver *>=======================
|Type: Entry       |Dungeon Ability: Wits      |Challenge Rating: 2          |
---------------------------< Challenge Information: >---------------------------
 "Congratulations! My name is Personal Assistant Pete, and you're registered
 for this Exhibition Team Fighting match here at the Lacour Tournament of
 Arms: Presented by Blastemol!® Before you get started, we'll just need each
 of you to complete this 73-page waiver produced by the Blastemol!® legal
 department. We'll need you to initial where indicated, but only on every
 third paragraph. On even paragraphs, you'll want the team captain to initial
 for you, but if you're the team captain, you'll need someone else to sign
 yours."

 "On page 3 you'll notice the symbol of the dark god Valmar..."
=Dungeon Conditions: Stupify, Tire============================================
<Pose Tracker> Avril Vent Fleur has posed.

For the record:

This had been Dean's bright idea. Not that Avril's thinking of this in those terms, but Rebecca sure is. Rebecca, who somehow or another, has been able to up and sit this one out.

The tournament was ending soon, after all, and it was now or never. Or something like that. As usual, Avril has ended up getting swept along for the ride. And somewhere along the process of even getting signed up for the exhibition match -- thankfully they'd met those other people in the lobby or this would be rather unfair -- she had ended up being automatically assigned as team captain.

Probably because she looks older than Dean, and the both of them were up at the counter first.

But even before the part where they take on what the coliseum has to offer--

"We have to sign where precisely?" Avril asks, alternating between squinting down at the paperwork -- all seventy-odd pages of it -- and back up again at the assistant. Hesitantly at first, she shuffles between the pages, as if attempting to quickly read what is frankly some really dang tiny print.

And then with a deft hand, she starts signing pages.

"Dean, if you would sign here, please..."

DG: Avril Vent Fleur has contributed a Wits Basic Action toward her party's challenge, The Legal Waiver.
<Pose Tracker> Claude C. Kenny has posed.

This is Claude C. Kenny's second time trying out this challenge, and this time he really just wants to work out some frustration. And so he is expecting to have to go through the waiver nonsense again. This time, though, he came prepared - he has activated his tricorder's wireless HUD (a contact lens, currently in his left eye) and audio functions (a small skin-contact patch behind his left ear, which stimulates his inner ear to produce sound).

And what is he using this advances technology for? Listening to classical music, of course.

Now Playing - Cheap Thrills

Mormon Tabernacle Choir

00:45

"---need dolla ills to have fun tonight---" he hums to himself as he pretty much just signs wherever.

DG: Claude C. Kenny has used his Tool Tricorder toward his party's challenge, The Legal Waiver.
<Pose Tracker> Dean Stark has posed.

Although not so much a fan of having people fight him because they're upset at him, when it comes to a bit of for-fun rough-and-tumbling, Dean Stark is all for it. Besides, Lacour is hot with tournament fever right now, so it's hard not to get into the mood! So when he'd learned that you could enter as a group as part of an exhibition fight at any time, where just about anyone can join in and strut their stuff, he thought it was a great idea to do something fun and cool! Sure, maybe Rebecca said she'd pass, but apparently you can team up with other groups? Or something? Whatever, it'll be fine!

Dean has never in his life ever heard of a legal waiver. It's questionable if he even knows what a legal *department* is.

Accepting the stack of papers from Avril, Dean stares down the rows and rows and *rows* of incomprehensible text with beads of sweat standing out like bullets on his skin. "Uhhhh..." he utters, peering close when she tells him to sign. "Okay, so... initial here... but only every third paragraph... and then initial *here*--wait, but that's only if the moon is full, and the moon's... a crescent right now? Maybe?" He scratches his head. Rebecca's probably counting her blessings right now. "And then need to sign and date here--wait, that's only if the tide is high on a spring Tuesday. Isn't it summer right now? I thought this tournament only ever took place in the summer?? Why would they even mention seasons if it's gonna be like this????"

His head might start leaking steam, when he flips enough pages to spot the symbol of the dark god Valmar. Dean lights up as if finally finding salvation. Could it be that he was a follower of the dark god all along...?! "Ohh, I get it!" he says aloud. "Wow, this'll be *way* easier than I thought!" Beaming, he tosses the papers up in the air haphazardly; Twin Fenrir appear in his hands, and for some reason, he opens fire on the pages as they fall.

""When you see weird symbols like that," he explains proudly a moment later, "it means you gotta shoot it and it'll make cool stuff happen!"

The legal waiver is a holey mess. Perhaps better than being an unholy mess? It might end up drawing attention, though.

DG: Dean Stark has used his Tool Twin Fenrir - Standard Cartridge toward his party's challenge, The Legal Waiver.
<Pose Tracker> June Lim Ze has posed.

This isn't June's first rodeo.

It is her first rodeo with her new, Edda-built limbs. The question may be asked, how can someone who got chopped up substantially enough to have lost about seven or eight pounds involuntarily be on their feet... well... foot again so quickly? The answer is a distillate and fermentation of a certain Adelhyde fruit, applied to dressings.

That's right: Heal Perry.

June also got hold of a proper name stamp, so she can just punch down on the waiver. "So how are all of you," says the #9 from the tournament, a cigarette dangling from her lips. She can't hear the music as it plays, before she pauses at the shooting of the waiver.

"Do you know what reading is?" she asks Dean.

DG: June Lim Ze has contributed a Wits Basic Action toward her party's challenge, The Legal Waiver.
DG: The party led by Avril Vent Fleur has passed this challenge! The party gained 16 exploration! If anyone needs to use party
management commands, do so now. Otherwise, the next round's GM may begin the next round with +dungeon/draw.
<Pose Tracker> Avril Vent Fleur has posed.

Signing the paperwork goes smoothly, as a general thing. At least, on the parts of those who have signed the papers before and, for some reason, Avril.

Or, to be more accurate, it goes smoothly until the point where Dean flings his papers into the air and puts bullet holes through the lot of them.

"Is that really what it means?" Avril asks. To her credit, she sounds dubious.

Meanwhile, this is trouble way beyond what they're paying poor Personal Assistant Pete. He takes one look at the fallen, hole-ridden papers, shrugs, and then thumbs back over his shoulder for them to head on in. "Good enough."

DG: Claude C. Kenny has drawn a new Challenge.
======================<* CHALLENGE - Kobold Fight Club *>=======================
|Type: Exploration |Dungeon Ability: Combat    |Challenge Rating: 1          |
---------------------------< Challenge Information: >---------------------------
 "Your next opponents are... kobolds? What the heck's a kobold? GET OVER
 HERE, PERSONAL ASSISTANT PETE!" (.....) "So they're basically goblins?"
 (.....) "But they smoke pipes and wear sailor suits?" (.....) "WELL GET SOME
 SAILOR SUITS ON THEM, PETE! /THAT IS AN ORDER!/"
=Dungeon Conditions: Wound, Injure============================================
<Pose Tracker> Claude C. Kenny has posed.

"Doin' good!" Claude C. Kenny answers June truthfully; he's finished with all of the stupid paperwork and is about to go hit some things with his violence. It's basically a great day. The only thing that would make it better, actually, is...

By the time our heroes emerge into the Coliseum, Claude is munching on an honest-to-goodness steak like most other people would a sandwich. He surveys the field of kobolds and sighs to himself. "Ugh, Skaven," he groans. "God, let's get this over with and hope they don't have any Doomwheels."

Before anyone can ask him what he's on about, Claude is in the mix, punching the kobolds. With his violence.

DG: Claude C. Kenny has used his Tool Pocket Steak toward his party's challenge, Kobold Fight Club.
<Pose Tracker> June Lim Ze has posed.

June stalks forwards and gives Claude a passing look. "Kobolds," she says. "And I have a Doomwheel."

With this, June throws herself forwards, leading with her prosthetic arm as she - cartwheels forwards!? What the hell is this. She is able to catch herself on the 'hoof' of the false leg and does another rotation which only an alert viewer would see has some subtle wobble to it, but which puts her BEHIND KOBOLDMY LINES.

At which point she sinks low and pivots around from this downward position, her leg deciding to go BANG and send low-size, high-impulse anti-slime pellet into the hindparts of kobolds. Sadly, there is no candle to take, but afterwards, June lays on the ground with her chin in her flesh hand for a moment to tell Claude, "see?"

Eyelash bat. "Doom wheel."

Then she hops back up to her feet.

DG: June Lim Ze has used her Tool Slimeshot Shell toward her party's challenge, Kobold Fight Club.
<Pose Tracker> Dean Stark has posed.

Avril asks if that's really what it means. Dean gives her a confused look. "Well, what else would it mean?" he replies. When June chips in with her question, he frowns. "Hey, of course I can read! I was just following the directions they had written down there!" That they'd somehow implied. By having a symbol mark.

In his defense, Pete *does* let them through. Dean's smile isn't smug, but it *is* triumphant. "See?" he declares to June.

And so the four of them head in together into the coliseum. He looks around, wide-eyed, once there. "Wow... This looks even bigger on the inside!" he remarks. "Oh, hey," he adds, turning to Claude and June, "by the way, my name's Dea--"

Suddenly, kobolds. They're everywhere. Them and their sailor suits. This city isn't even on the ocean!! Dean, for his part, takes the interruption well enough in stride; his ARMs flash into his hands, the same pair of revolver pistols from before. "This'll be easy!" he declares with possibly undue confidence. And, naturally, like anyone wielding a pair of pistols, he fights in the best way possible: he runs up to the kobolds and smacks them over the head with the combat rods that for some reason sprouted from the pistol handles.

"What's a Doomwheel?" he adds after the fact to Claude and June. This is before June cartwheels herself forward to get behind the ranks and shoot them. With her leg. "Ohhhhh," Dean adds. A beat. Then: "Neat!"

DG: Dean Stark has contributed a Combat Basic Action toward his party's challenge, Kobold Fight Club.
<Pose Tracker> Avril Vent Fleur has posed.

At that, Avril pauses, as if contemplating the answer. And then, the silver-haired waif can only really honestly answer:

"I don't know."

But for now it's onwards and inwards, where the competition awaits. Hopefully, Rebecca is up there in the stands to cheer them both on!

"Hmm." Avril frowns slightly, eyeing the sailor-suited kobolds across the arena from her. "It would seem these are our opponents. Well, I hope this will be a fair fight." With a sweeping motion she draws what would look to be the ill-begotten child of a sword hilt and the handle of a gun and races forward into the fray in a flurry of footsteps. One pull of the trigger is enough to bring what is, yes, a weapon to life. She lashes out with it at the kobold crew.

It's a laser whip. What was that about a fair fight?!

Drawing back a few steps, whip sizzling in the air at her side, she turns to glance at Claude and June. "A Doomwheel? What is--"

June demonstrates handily.

"Oh, I see. So that is a Doomwheel. That was quite good."

DG: Avril Vent Fleur has used her Tool Beam Whip Mode toward her party's challenge, Kobold Fight Club.
DG: The party led by Avril Vent Fleur has passed this challenge! The party gained 12 exploration! If anyone needs to use party
management commands, do so now. Otherwise, the next round's GM may begin the next round with +dungeon/draw.
<Pose Tracker> Claude C. Kenny has posed.

"It's pretty much bullshit is what it is," Claude answers, but then June demonstrates her own version. He frowns consideringly. "That's pretty close," he admits. "Seven out of ten."

Soon enough, the Coliseum runs out of kobolds before everyone else runs out of punches. (or shots, or laser whips)

DG: Dean Stark has drawn a new Challenge.
======================<* CHALLENGE - Halftime Interview *>======================
|Type: Exploration |Dungeon Ability: Wits      |Challenge Rating: 1          |
---------------------------< Challenge Information: >---------------------------
 "ALL RIGHT! While we reset the Arena for the next round of the match, we're
 gonna go down to the sidelines for an interview with Miss Blastemol!®
 herself: BLASTINA!!!! GO FOR IT!"

 "hey there master tman i'm down here to talk to them there peeps bout how
 dey gon' whup dem guys in dere butt-butts, SO WHADDYA GOTTA SAY FO YOSELFS?"
=Dungeon Conditions: Stupify, Injure==========================================
<Pose Tracker> Dean Stark has posed.

"That was easy!" Dean cheers, ARMs vanishing from his hands, when the arena, eventually, runs out of kobolds. Between the four of them, they made tiny work out of the monsters, so maybe his confidence is warranted. Master Torque yells about resetting the area for the next round of the match, while 'Blastina' arrives in order to do an interview in the professional and comprehensive manner Lacour has come to know and appreciate from Blastemol!®.

"hey there master tman i'm down here to talk to them there peeps bout how dey gon' whup dem guys in dere butt-butts, SO WHADDYA GOTTA SAY FO YOSELFS?" she says, shoving what may be a microphone and may be a turkey baster and may be something else entirely into the faces of the contestants.

Dean stares, dumbfounded. He didn't catch a single word she just said. "Uhhhh... What??"

A pause. He gets the feeling like he's expected to do or say something. Everyone's eyes are on him. So Dean does the one thing he can: "Uhh... I have neat guns! Here, check it out!" And out they come again. Pew pew pew pew!

DG: Dean Stark has used his Tool Twin Fenrir - Standard Cartridge toward his party's challenge, Halftime Interview.
<Pose Tracker> June Lim Ze has posed.

June's eyes narrow.

"You making fun of how I talk?" June says, baring her teeth. Then Dean starts shooting off guns. "Go talk to Two Second Charlie there," June says, pointing.

DG: June Lim Ze has contributed a Wits Basic Action toward her party's challenge, Halftime Interview.
<Pose Tracker> Claude C. Kenny has posed.

Claude cycles through on his playlist a few times as Blastina starts talking to other people, because he was stuck on the Oratanian national anthem for a while, and the Oratanians' only known cultural export is their native practice of scream singing. But then he leans in.

"Well Blastine we gotta give one hundred and ten percent out there and take it one challenge at a time and play like there's no tomorrow, the other guys are going to come right at us and we just need to come together, play our game, and the good lord willing, at the end of the day we'll have a real chance at victory."

He's American, his second language is sports cliches.

DG: Claude C. Kenny has used his Tool Tricorder toward his party's challenge, Halftime Interview.
<Pose Tracker> Avril Vent Fleur has posed.

Those poor kobolds. "My apologies," Avril says, way belatedly, ducking her head in a short and shallow bow as they vanquish their foes and she returns her ARM to its inert state and slips it back under her gown from whence it came.

And then, it's halftime!

Avril blinks, shrinking back a step as the microphone is thrust her way. "Ah," she utters, looking briefly like a deer in the headlights.

"...We intend to do our best in this exhibition match. The best of luck to our opponents." She looks very, very serious about this whole business.

DG: Avril Vent Fleur has contributed a Wits Basic Action toward her party's challenge, Halftime Interview.
DG: The party led by Avril Vent Fleur has passed this challenge! The party gained 12 exploration! If anyone needs to use party
management commands, do so now. Otherwise, the next round's GM may begin the next round with +dungeon/draw.
<Pose Tracker> Dean Stark has posed.

"YEAAAAAAAH, THIS BOY KNOWS WHADDUP," Blastina declares, pointing at Claude and his expertly-spoken stream of sports cliches. To Avril, who is a total adorable seriouscat about this, and June, who bares her teeth and basically tells her to fuck off, she adds, "Giiiirl. Giiiiiiiirrl. GIIIIIIIRRRRRRL." It's hard to tell whether she's approving or disapproving, but the audience appears to be nodding, so that's... a good thing? Probably? And then Dean fires his guns and Blastina's all, "YEAH, POW POW POW!! Y'all are ready to rock!" Thumbs up!

And so, interview (?) concluded (???), Blastina leaves the arena and its contestants. The next round awaits!

DG: June Lim Ze has drawn a new Challenge.
===========================<* CHALLENGE - OH YEAH *>============================
|Type: Exploration |Dungeon Ability: Brute     |Challenge Rating: 1          |
---------------------------< Challenge Information: >---------------------------
 "Your next challenge is just on the other side of this GIGANTIC STONE WALL!
 But don't worry, there is a door over there that will only open after you
 solve an intricate puzzle based on a series of levers and pulleys!"

 "JUST KIDDING, $#*& THE PUZZLES, JUST GO THROUGH THE WALL LIKE A BADASS!"
=Dungeon Conditions: Slow=====================================================
<Pose Tracker> June Lim Ze has posed.

June narrows her eyes at Blastina as she says "girl" three times. "Girl bye," she concludes, before turning around to step forwards when they are faced with

WALL

The stone wall looms, composed of rubble mortared firmly together and set to dry. It may be crane-operated. As the announcer explains, June rubs her chin. "All this jagged crap... but it's been smoothed..."

Her prosthetic leg comes up with an elegant precision before she rests it against the stone and looks at the others. "This is funny," she says, before

WHAM!

Her newly-replaced knee nearly hits her right square in the face. June says a word that the blast thankfully conceals. It was a Word Not Suited For Children.

DG: June Lim Ze has used her Tool Doorknocker Shell toward her party's challenge, OH YEAH.
<Pose Tracker> Claude C. Kenny has posed.

Claude waves fondly to Blastina as she walks away. What a nice young lady.

And then the next challenge is every Drifter's dream come true. "Yeah, SCREW YOU DOORS!" the blonde swordsman roars as he pulls his hands back, chi gathering between his palms as he focuses his energies. "METEOR PALM!" he roars, throwing a totally original technique at the wall where June has weakened it.

(okay, it's a hadouken)

DG: Claude C. Kenny has contributed a Brute Basic Action toward his party's challenge, OH YEAH.
<Pose Tracker> Avril Vent Fleur has posed.

Avril tilts her head to one side as Blastina departs. "I wonder what that was about?" she asks aloud, before turning away. "Well, the next challenge should be--"

Avril pauses there, staring at the wall that rests between them and VICTORY. "I suppose we should search for the..." She trails off, and blinks again.

No. This time there is no key, no puzzle to solve. Just the wall.

She stands there still as other people bring brute force to bear against the vicious wall, as explosions ring out.

Avril at long last approaches the wall and... pushes at it.

DG: Avril Vent Fleur has contributed a Brute Basic Action toward her party's challenge, OH YEAH.
<Pose Tracker> Dean Stark has posed.

Whew, it worked! Dean beams. This tournament thing is going great so far!

And it looks like it's only going to get better. Their next opponent: A WALL. He gives June a puzzled look--"It is?" he asks, of it being funny--before grinning at Claude. "YEAH!" he cheers along with him, punching a fist into the air. "LET'S TEAR THIS WALL DOWN!"

Later, under much different circumstances, he might remember he said this and smile.

For now, though, he reaches into his coat, adding, "And we'll do it with the help of--" TADAAAA. "MY TRUSTY SHOVEL!!" Despite what the Tool name says, it may or may not be Black Fenrir, given that Black Fenrir got snapped in two by a monster. Shhh. Continuity error.

Either way, once June knees it and Claude blasts it, Dean diligently gets to work on shoveling whatever crap is left behind out of the way. "That's the spirit!" he encourages Avril, when she attempts to... push it. "We can do this, together!"

Dean's so nice.

DG: Dean Stark has used his Tool Black Fenrir - THAT DAMN SHOVEL toward his party's challenge, OH YEAH.
DG: The party led by Avril Vent Fleur has passed this challenge! The party gained 27 exploration! If anyone needs to use party
management commands, do so now. Otherwise, the next round's GM may begin the next round with +dungeon/draw.
<Pose Tracker> June Lim Ze has posed.

AND THE WALL

COMES TUMBLIN DOWN

TUMBLIN DOWN

YEAH, TUMBLIN DOWN

"Agh! Dammit!" June says as loosely-agglomerated gabbros fall down onto her. Nonetheless the wall is breached, and the path to victory opens before the others.

"What is he," June says at the sight of Dean, "some kind of shovel kn-"

DG: Avril Vent Fleur has drawn a new Challenge.
========================<* CHALLENGE - Robbin Goblins *>========================
|Type: Exploration |Dungeon Ability: Combat    |Challenge Rating: 1          |
---------------------------< Challenge Information: >---------------------------
 "Our next combatants are taking to the arena, and it's a group of murderous
 goblins! Only instead of murdering people, they're just going to steal all
 of your consumable items and then run away from battle with your
 super-expensive medicine!"

 "HOLY #@*& THESE GUYS ARE $#*HOLES!"
=Dungeon Conditions: Bad Luck=================================================
<Pose Tracker> Avril Vent Fleur has posed.

"Thank you, Dean," comes Avrils response as she attempts to push at the wall/whatever pieces of the wall remain.

...Pushing at it, as it turns out, isn't very effective. Even fallen bits of rock refuse to move, and at some length, Avril just scrambles over the remaining rock.

Well, she tried.

AND ON THE OTHER SIDE OF THE WALL IS--

A pack of goblins.

But not just any pack of goblins.

Remember those Elixirs you were saving for a rainy day? Remember that nice Potion Berry you were definitely going to use against the next major boss fight? OR ALL THAT GELLA YOU SAVED UP?

These guys remember. Remember when they stole them, that is.

"Dean, everyone, be careful," Avril says, stepping up front and center. "I don't like the looks in their eyes. I think these goblins may be thieves!"

And with that, out comes the laser whip once again.

No mercy??

DG: Avril Vent Fleur has used her Tool Beam Whip Mode toward her party's challenge, Robbin Goblins.
<Pose Tracker> Claude C. Kenny has posed.

"SUCK IT, DOOR!" CLaude C. Kenny proclaims, pumping a fist in victory. He reaches into his pocket to pull out a snack, raises it to his mouth...

  • swiped*

".....GET BACK HERE I'LL KILL YOU!" the young man roars, chasing after the goblin, firing Air SLashes every which way.

Now Playing - Yakety Sax

00:07

DG: Claude C. Kenny has used his Tool Pocket Steak toward his party's challenge, Robbin Goblins.
<Pose Tracker> June Lim Ze has posed.

June's teeth bare again.

She had to blow most of her tournament winnings on getting these improved prosthetics. In a fleeting moment she sees the face of 'Lady Chloe' on one of the goblins. Her leg fires - and she lunges forwards to slam that goblin in the gut with her prosthetic fist and send it flying backwards, hopefully into its kin folk! "RUDE!" she shouts.

DG: June Lim Ze has used her Tool Slimeshot Shell toward her party's challenge, Robbin Goblins.
<Pose Tracker> Dean Stark has posed.

Dean grins at Avril. "No problem!" And they do, in fact, make it through together. ...mostly due to June, Claude, and Dean's efforts. But Avril comes with them, and that's as together as you can get.

"VICTORY!" he proclaims, holding up his shovel triumphantly. But on the other side of the wall is... a pack of goblins?! Frowning, he puts said shovel away, double ARMs flashing into his hands. "What? Thieves?! That's not okay!" So he says, until one day he meets Carol and her Luck Medium--but that's a story for another day. "It's okay, we'll just have to beat them before they--"

*SWIPE*

"HEY!!" he yells at the goblin that just stole Claude's steak. "YOU CAN'T JUST TAKE SOMEONE ELSE'S DINNER!!" Plus that steak looks soooo good... mmmmm... Wait, what are they doing right now? Oh right, beating up goblins. WHA-PAM, go the combat rods on Dean's guns. WHA-PAM WHA-PAM WHA-PAM!! they'll continue to go until this matter is resolved, one way or another.

DG: Dean Stark has contributed a Combat Basic Action toward his party's challenge, Robbin Goblins.
DG: The party led by Avril Vent Fleur has passed this challenge! The party gained 7 exploration! If anyone needs to use party
management commands, do so now. Otherwise, the next round's GM may begin the next round with +dungeon/draw.
<Pose Tracker> Avril Vent Fleur has posed.

"Oh no--"

It's just seconds into the fight and a steak is stolen! Enemies with the ability to steal can be so cruel...

Claude will get his satisfaction, though -- between him and Dean teaming up, the goblin never had the chance to get away with its ill-gotten prize.

The steak's still there if Claude wants it back.

The others never even get as close as that. Between a discharge of prosthetics-borne shells and a display of whipcraft, the winners of this bout are evident:

Definitely not the goblins, who lie on the dirt twitching.

"Thank you, everyone," Avril says, bowing.

...No apologies this time? Some things are just unforgivable.

DG: June Lim Ze has drawn a new Challenge.
======================<* CHALLENGE - Suddenly Dolphins *>=======================
|Type: Exploration |Dungeon Ability: Agility   |Challenge Rating: 2          |
---------------------------< Challenge Information: >---------------------------
 "Your next opponents chickened out because they didn't want to fight you!
 THIS IS UNACCEPTABLE! So instead we are going to make the entire arena into
 a giant ocean with nothing to stand on except swimming dolphins!"

 "The dolphins also have hats with spikes on them! YOU ARE WELCOME!"
=Dungeon Conditions: Stupify==================================================
<Pose Tracker> June Lim Ze has posed.

June, wreathed in gunsmoke, relaxes. She's still adapting, but, she thinks, it's working out fine. In some ways this new leg is better. There's less leverage force behind it, sure, but she can just kick in a different way. She imagines oblongs and ovals for no good reason.

Then comes the explanation.

June looks at the arena in front of her, where there were some obstacles for the sake of vertical leap stunts. "Oh no," she says. "Oh no."

Looking over her shoulder towards the others, June starts to scream. "THEY'RE GONNA DO IT!" June says. What? Jeez, why yell?!

The reason becomes clear when the FLOOD GATES OPEN AND THE SEAWATER SURGES IN. "THEY'RE GONNA FLOOD THE ARENA!" June says, before vanishing into the press of the sea foam.

Well. That was emphatic. Especially when those sleek gray fins start appearing...

DG: June Lim Ze has contributed a Agility Basic Action toward her party's challenge, Suddenly Dolphins.
<Pose Tracker> Dean Stark has posed.

"And STAY down!" Dean shouts to the goblins twitching on the arena floor. Man, though, this is fun! He'd happily do this tournament again if there were time for it! With the finals being basically tomorrow, this was basically their last chance. Since it *is* their last chance, though, they'd better make it count!

Then Master Torque yells something about their next opponents chickening out and something something water and dolphins and 'THEY'RE GONNA FLOOD THE ARENA' "Wait, what?"

SPLASH. Dean drowns. Wait, no, it's okay, he managed to grab hold of a nearby dolphin just in time and is clinging to it for dear life.

"EEEE EE EE E EEEE EEE EEEE!" the dolphin shrieks angrily as it courses through the waves that may or may not even be real, given the nature of the Symbology-based adjustments to the arena.

"HUBLUB BLUBLB BLUBLBLUBLBUBL," Dean chokes, clinging that much harder as he attempts to grab its dorsal fin and yank himself to something approximating upright. Stupid dolphin! Stop being so slippery!!

DG: Dean Stark has contributed a Agility Basic Action toward his party's challenge, Suddenly Dolphins.
<Pose Tracker> Claude C. Kenny has posed.

Claude is interested in retrieving the steak, but not when the floor begins to turn into an ocean. "OKAY, BUT WHY THOUGH?" he asks, half a second before vanishing beneath the waves in a gurgling *blorp*

He re-emerges a few seconds later, punching a dolphin in the face, because it is trying to headbutt him with its spike hat. Dolphins are jerks.

DG: Claude C. Kenny has contributed a Agility Basic Action toward his party's challenge, Suddenly Dolphins.
<Pose Tracker> June Lim Ze has posed.

The prospect that this is symbology in action never even occured to June. Possibly because she is not buoyant at all.

<Pose Tracker> Avril Vent Fleur has posed.

Avril takes a moment to dust off her gown, before returning her ARM to its proper place at her hip. "Well, let us see who our next opponent shall be."

Their next opponent, apparently, has ditched.

So instead, the arena will be flooded and they'll face off against--

Avril glances about herself in shock as the waters rise rapidly.

Or at least, they sure look and feel that way. Isn't magic amazing?

Treading water, she fumbles for something else she must keep tucked carefully beneath her gown as dark shapes surge through the water towards them.

"Look, Dean!" Avril points out helpfully, "Dolphins!"

Still floating as serenely as a swan (and probably doing about as much work beneath the surface) she lifts overhead an odd octagonal disc. "Sea Guardian Lucadia, please lend us your aid!" she calls as the disc shines.

A little bit of a lift, courtesy of what is probably (probably) just a passing wave, might not hurt their odds here of getting up on the dolphins' backs. It might be a good idea to watch those spikes though.

DG: Avril Vent Fleur has used her Tool Sea Medium toward her party's challenge, Suddenly Dolphins.
DG: The party led by Avril Vent Fleur has failed this challenge! The party gained 0 exploration! If anyone needs to use party
management commands, do so now. Otherwise, the next round's GM may begin the next round with +dungeon/draw.
<Pose Tracker> June Lim Ze has posed.

DID YOU KNOW: Dolphins love to slam their snouts into people's soft bellies and semi-firm crotches?

Well, you do now.

The seawater recedes, along with the dolphins, who are either constructions of advanced Symbology or are, in fact, the source of the distortion in Filgaia. One of them gets up on its hind fins and laughs at everyone before doing a leap and vanishing from view.

June lays on the ground, dripping, for a few moments.

"This is why I like eating 'em," she says finally, pushing herself upright.

DG: Claude C. Kenny has drawn a new Challenge.
========================<* CHALLENGE - Zwee Fighting *>=========================
|Type: Exploration |Dungeon Ability: Agility   |Challenge Rating: 1          |
---------------------------< Challenge Information: >---------------------------
 "These jokers are supposed to be ninjas, WHICH SHOULD BE TOTALLY AWESOME!
 But apparently they only know how to do that move where you zip around
 really fast, and leave those little blurry fizzy things behind!"

 "RUNNING AWAY IS NOT A MARTIAL ART! Catch them now so you can KICK THE CRAP
 OUTTA THEM!"
=Dungeon Conditions: Slow=====================================================
<Pose Tracker> Claude C. Kenny has posed.

Claude spits out half a gallon of water, and most of a steak, as he lies on the COliseum floor gasping for air. "Dolphins are jerks," he sputters, weakly, rising to his feet. BUT THEN...

Oh man, ninjas. THe blonde swordsman grimaces, trying to track the rapid movements of the flickering foes. "Ugh," he groans. "What would my master do if she was in this situation?"

....

"SCREW YOU GUYS!" he roars, then slams a foot into the ground, causing spikes to shoot up from the earth. That'll slow 'em down, maybe.

DG: Claude C. Kenny has contributed a Agility Basic Action toward his party's challenge, Zwee Fighting.
<Pose Tracker> Avril Vent Fleur has posed.

Did you also know: dolphins are just incredibly slippery?

This makes it a problem to actually keep one's balance, magical assistance in play or not.

In short, this could have gone better. As the water recedes, Avril's among those left stranded at the bottom of the sea -- er, well, the floor of the arena. She sits up, still clutching the Medium. "Is everyone alright?"

She blinks, water pooling about herself. Blue eyes briefly track the zipping little ninjas. "...Oh, I see. Well, I suppose we will have to catch them, then?"

Avril closes her eyes, and slowly, stands. Once again, she invokes the power of the strange disc in a display of flickering light. "Sea Guardian..."

With no water around, the effect might not be immediately clear. Avril, though, leaps as one of the ninjas zips past her, apparently intent on tackling it in mid-air... or giving it the elbow drop. It could be either?!

DG: Avril Vent Fleur has used her Tool Sea Medium toward her party's challenge, Zwee Fighting.
<Pose Tracker> Dean Stark has posed.

Dean did *not* know that!

He could have lived his whole life never knowing that, honestly.

"AVRIL HELP I'M DROWNING," he yelps back when Avril points out the dolphins. Her summoning of the Sea Guardian helps a little, but frankly, Dean cannot swim worth a bean, having always sunk like a rock the moment he steps into any body of water deeper than his head, which is not very tall. When the waves finally pass and the asshole dolphins mock them as they leave, Dean is left gurgling on the arena ground.

"Ughh... is it over?" he groans, picking himself off. "That was awful!" Still, it's a new match, and there are NINJAS, except they're just... zipping around them. Zip! Zip! Zip! Dean looks confused by this for a moment.

"So... like... they're not going to attack? We just have to trip them?" he says. Then Avril talks of catching them, and he nods. "Yeah. We can do that, I'm sure!" He looks around at the enemy for a moment; then he takes his ARMs, steps around so the pole is outwardmost, and then just... sticks it into the blurs near where the feet are.

DG: Dean Stark has contributed a Agility Basic Action toward his party's challenge, Zwee Fighting.
<Pose Tracker> June Lim Ze has posed.

June for her part sloshes around and moves forwards as the ninjas are revealed. "God damn it," June mutters. She calls towards others - maybe Dean, primarily - "You know, the real ones don't even dress up! They look like anyone else! These idiots are dressed up like Guild Galad-style stage hands, 'cuz in the plays -" She's catching up with some effort, perhaps on sheer irritation.

"In the plays you ignore 'em! Like how you ignore it ain't really a Metal Demon! Then POW one of them does some sick moves -"

At which point June does a slide-rush at the ankles of one of them.

Like so, presumably.

DG: June Lim Ze has contributed a Agility Basic Action toward her party's challenge, Zwee Fighting.
DG: The party led by Avril Vent Fleur has failed this challenge! The party gained 2 exploration! If anyone needs to use party
management commands, do so now. Otherwise, the next round's GM may begin the next round with +dungeon/draw.
<Pose Tracker> Claude C. Kenny has posed.

Unfortunately, ninjas can run on water, and also apparently spikes, so they just sort of keep on ZWEEing while everybody else gets a little more wet and angry.

If only there was something coming up they could take their frustrations out on!

DG: Dean Stark has drawn a new Challenge.
====================<* CHALLENGE - Beating Up A Carriage *>=====================
|Type: Climax      |Dungeon Ability: Brute     |Challenge Rating: 1          |
---------------------------< Challenge Information: >---------------------------
 "We're almost at the final round, sports entertainment fans! But before
 that, look to the centre of the Arena, where you will see a pair of
 brand-new two-horse carriages! One is for our competitors, and the other is
 for a couple of hobos we dressed up in martial arts uniforms! Can you smash
 your carriage into pieces before the hobos beat up theirs?"

 "MAAAAAAAAAAAAAYBEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!"
=Dungeon Conditions: Tire=====================================================
<Pose Tracker> Dean Stark has posed.

Dean manages to trip... *a* ninja? Maybe? But then they pick themself up and keep right on ZWEEing, along with all the other ninjas. Man, this tournament is getting tough! Still, he's not gonna lose! And, frankly, failing to trip ninjas is still a sight better than nearly drowning in maybe-real-maybe-not water.

Then they bring out two carriages to the sound of Master Torque's announcing. Dean blinks. "Wait, so we just have to scrap that carriage? Man, that's *easy*!" he declares, possibly damning the group. He pulls out his shovel again, beaming. "And it gets even easier if you can cut some of the lines! Just let me chop some of them and--"

Dean no, shovels are not for chopping. (This does not stop him from trying. He's quite eager about it, in fact.)

DG: Dean Stark has used his Tool Black Fenrir - THAT DAMN SHOVEL toward his party's challenge, Beating Up A Carriage.
<Pose Tracker> Claude C. Kenny has posed.

After failing to punch dolphins and then also failing to trip ninjas, Claude C. Kenny is grateful for the opportunity to do something as simple as smash a carriage. He runs up toward the bulk of it, draws ain a deep breath, and then begins lashing out with flickering punches, accompanied by blue-yellow blurs of chi.

E. Honda would be proud.

DG: Claude C. Kenny has contributed a Brute Basic Action toward his party's challenge, Beating Up A Carriage.
<Pose Tracker> Avril Vent Fleur has posed.

Avril leaps, attempting to draw upon the Sea Guardian's blessing allow her to catch one of the zipping ninjas!

...Avril wiffs as the ninja she's attempting to catch zips right out and away from here, and completes an impressive and not very graceful faceplant into the dirt.

Maybe the Guardians don't want their blessings to be used for things like this...?

Rubbing at her gown for a moment after picking herself back up -- before realizing that this is probably wasted effort -- Avril's sense of dignity at least is no worse for the wear: she approaches their next challenge as steadily as she's faced off against any others. "So, we must destroy this carriage?" she says, regarding the thing before her. She tilts her head, as if considering this obstacle before them. "I am uncertain what we gain by attempting this, but if this is what is required to advance..."

Avril delivers a little kick at the side, only to frown, back up, and look at the carriage again.

Oh, there are some small parts on the side. Maybe she can just pull those off instead?

Every little bit counts.

DG: Avril Vent Fleur has contributed a Brute Basic Action toward her party's challenge, Beating Up A Carriage.
<Pose Tracker> June Lim Ze has posed.

June takes a deep breath and lets it out. "You say that," June says as she hikes up her - garter? no, it's some kind of mechanism. She tries to push a shotgun shell into it as she explains further, "But they're tougher than you think. They have to be, out in the open road of Filga..i...a..."

The shell keeps floating out of the water-filled gun barrel.

June hoists that leg up vertically so it can drain, bunny hopping for a pace or so as she gets closer to the carriage. She puffs out her cheeks as she sees Claude going ham on it, as Avril gives a little kick to it, and then she tells her, "Here's how you do it."

June tears open the door and slams her leg in, socketing in the shell and pulling a lever-action up with a satisfying KLATCH. "Open your mouth," she tells Avril.

Then comes the BLAM of the stone-breaking anti-door round, aimed RIGHT at the 'keel' of the wagon! Or at least where June expects one to be. Yeah, she's stunting a little.

DG: June Lim Ze has used her Tool Doorknocker Shell toward her party's challenge, Beating Up A Carriage.
DG: The party led by Avril Vent Fleur has passed this challenge! The party gained 0 exploration! If anyone needs to use party
management commands, do so now. Otherwise, the next round's GM may begin the next round with +dungeon/draw.
<Pose Tracker> Dean Stark has posed.

"It's just part of the tournament! I mean, I'm sure there's *some* point to it," Dean says to Avril. Dean is the type to think 'that would be SO AWESOME' is a legitimate point, so he's not even wrong, from his own perspective.

Dean then breaks some important spokes contributing to structural integrity, Avril kinda kicks at it a bit, June stunts at it, and Claude just punches it over and over like he is already dead. Between the four of them, they make quick work of that carriage--quicker, at least, than those hobos, who cry and wail when the other carriage collapses before theirs has a chance to.

"YEAH! WE DID IT!" Dean cheers, putting his shovel away. It seems like he's recovered from his near-drowning, but then, Dean's resilience is one of his good points. "What's next?! I'm ready for anything!"

DG: Avril Vent Fleur has drawn a new Challenge.
=========================<* CHALLENGE - Mirror Match *>=========================
|Type: Final       |Dungeon Ability: Combat    |Challenge Rating: 3          |
---------------------------< Challenge Information: >---------------------------
 "WHOA MOMMA TORQUE! It looks like our competitors' last challenge is SHADOWY
 VERSIONS OF OUR COMPETITORS THEMSELVES! These guys have all the same powers
 and abilities as our competitors, so this'll be a tough fight! It looks like
 the most difficult opponent they'll have to overcome is the darkness inside
 of themselves!"

 "....OH MAN THAT *#&$ WAS *@$#ING DEEP!"
=Dungeon Conditions: Tire=====================================================
<Pose Tracker> Avril Vent Fleur has posed.

"Hmm. I suppose so," Avril relents, bowing in the face of superior logic.

As it happens, kicking at it doesn't do that much... and the bits on the side are pretty well-bolted on.

Here's how you do it, June says.

"Oh? Will you demonstrate for me, in that case?" Avril asks aloud, before taking a step back to observe, her expression as grave and as critical as if she were witnessing a serious experiment getting underway.

June delivers a destructive round into the heart of the carriage.

Hand resting against her chin, Avril nods at the conclusion of the attempt. "I see. However, I believe I am unable to pull off the same maneuver as you." Judging from her delivery -- truly deadpan -- this time it's probably, probably meant as a bit of a tease rather than an honest serious statement. Probably.

"Congratulations!" she cheers, as the carriage collapses. "What do you think awaits us next?"

She gets an answer fairly quickly. They all get an answer fairly quickly after.

The power of magic is amazing.

Avril blinks, drawing her hand up as if to ward their shadowy doubles off. "Something... seems strangely familiar about this..." she murmurs as she eyes her miscolored twin, only to shake her head. "Well, I have heard it said that one's greatest opponent is oneself." In a flash, she draws her ARM and pulls the trigger, as her duplicate does similiarly.

"Though, I never thought it would be quite so literal..."

En garde.

DG: Avril Vent Fleur has used her Tool Beam Whip Mode toward her party's challenge, Mirror Match.
<Pose Tracker> Claude C. Kenny has posed.

Claude C. Kenny meets Ynnek C. Edualc in a battle of two master swordsmen in peak condition, ready for the fight of their lives! What epic duel of blade and skill will they show us---

"AIR SLASH!" "AIR SLASH!"

"AIR SLASH!" "AIR SLASH!"

"AIR SLASH!" "AIR SLASH!"

"AIR SLASH!" "AIR SLASH!"

"AIR SLASH!" "AIR SLASH!"

"AIR SLASH!" "AIR SLASH!"

"AIR SLASH!" "AIR SLASH!"

"AIR SLASH!" "AIR SLASH!"

"AIR SLASH!" "AIR SLASH!"

"AIR SLASH!" "AIR SLASH!"

"AIR SLASH!" "AIR SLASH!"

"AIR SLASH!" "AIR SLASH!"

"AIR SLASH!" "AIR SLASH!"

"AIR SLASH!" "AIR SLASH!"

"AIR SLASH!" "AIR SLASH!"

"AIR SLASH!" "AIR SLASH!"

"AIR SLASH!" "AIR SLASH!"

"AIR SLASH!" "AIR SLASH!"

"AIR SLASH!" "AIR SLASH!"

DG: Claude C. Kenny has used his Tool Pocket Steak toward his party's challenge, Mirror Match.
<Pose Tracker> Dean Stark has posed.

The final round arrives. The opponents are... themselves?! "Woah!" Dean utters, gawking at his shadow, his TRUE se--wait, no, it's just a weird Symbology clone. Avril intones that sometimes the strongest opponent is oneself. "WOAH!" Dean echoes. Mind. BLOWN. "Well, I'm not gonna lose! Not even to myself!!" he declares, ARMs flashing into his hands.

His double's ARMs flash into their hands, too.

"Woah!!" Dean gasps for the third time in one minute. "He really is a double of me!"

"Woah!!" his double gasps. "He really is a double of me!"

"Wait a sec, *I'm* not the double, YOU'RE the double!"

"Wait a sec, *I'm* not the double, YOU'RE the double!"

"STOP COPYING ME!"

"STOP COPYING ME!"

"I'll get you for that--!!"

"I'll get you for that--!!"

And so Dean and Shadow Dean lunge at each other, headfirst, each (?) of them determined to find out who is the real Dean and who's the faker hedgehog. ...Uh, Drifter.

DG: Dean Stark has contributed a Combat Basic Action toward his party's challenge, Mirror Match.
<Pose Tracker> June Lim Ze has posed.

June takes a deep breath as she comes up against this revelation of an inverse her.

She stares at the other June.

The other June stares back.

Now June.

Now the other.

June.

The other.

June.

The other.

June

The other

june

the other

june - the other

SUDDENLY both of them kick with their prosthetic legs. There is a platonic ideal of metal slamming against metal.

Who will prevail?!

DG: June Lim Ze has contributed a Combat Basic Action toward her party's challenge, Mirror Match.
DG: You have overcome the dungeon's trials! This run is a success!
DG: The party led by Avril Vent Fleur has successfully explored Lacour Coliseum!
=======================<* CHALLENGE - A Winner Is You *>========================
|Type: DIscovery   |Dungeon Ability: Discovery |Challenge Rating: 1          |
---------------------------< Challenge Information: >---------------------------
 "AAAAAAAAAAAAND WEEEEEEEEEEEEE HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAVE AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
 WIIIIIIIIIINNEEEEEEEEEEEEEER! Congratulations to our competitors! In honour
 of their triumph in this exhibition match, they will each receive a special
 prize commemorating their victory: A PURPLE PARTICIPATION RIBBON! Thanks for
 coming out to this Exhibition Team Fighting match here at the Lacour
 Tournament of Arms: Presented by Blastemol!®"

 "NOW WALK OUT OF THIS ARENA ACCOMPANIED BY THIS /TOTALLY SICK AIR GUITAR
 SOLO!/"

 "MEEYOWEYOWYOWYOWEEYOWSQUEEDLYMEEEEEEEEEOW!"
=Dungeon Conditions: Treasure=================================================
<Pose Tracker> Avril Vent Fleur has posed.

All at once, the Drifter competitors collide, tackle, trade blows, and narrowly evade the incoming strikes from their dark counterparts.

In the end, it is the shadows that are found wanting, and like the proverbial candle in the wind, they evaporate once struck down, their essence fading away into the breeze.

They've won.

"Thank you, both of you," Avril says to Claude and June, ducking into a short bow in the small space before the air guitar solo starts up. "Dean, we should go meet up with Rebecca and--"

It's gotten a little bit noisy in here, for some reason.

<Pose Tracker> Dean Stark has posed.


"Ha*ha*! I told you I wasn't the double!" Dean declares triumphantly with his shadow self falls under the might of his combat rods. Heaven only knows how Dean would have reacted if he'd lost this fight. Existential crisis averted? Either way, he hurries over to Avril, ARMs vanishing in a flash of light. "We did it! We won!! Man, if only Rebecca were here--she really missed out on so much fun!"

As Master Torque announces their victory and the crowds roar their approval, Dean waves enthusiastically back into them. He thinks he spots Rebecca in the stands; he waves extra-hard for her. Then he turns and accepts his prize for mastering the tournament exhibition.

"Wow! A ribbon!" he breathes, sincerely delighted as he accepts the purple thing. "This'll be a great way to remember this tournament, huh, Avril?" He beams hard at her, apparently forgetting for the moment that Avril is an amnesiac. "Oh, but you're right--let's get going!" He waves, too, to Claude and June. "See ya guys later! Nice meeting you! Bye!!"

And then he hurries out with Avril, more out of excitement than anything else. ...he never did catch their names. Oh well, such is life.

<Pose Tracker> June Lim Ze has posed.

"Heh," says the Mirror June. "So you - what?"

Her leg cracks - splits - she blows away -

June stalks forwards. "Hnf," she says, tossing her hair back and putting both her hands on her hips in an oppositionally defiant, and potentially attractive, pose.

"... bye," she then says to Dean as they swiftly withdraw.

"Lacour sucks," June then mutters, as she stomps off to try and find that fried tofu place again.