Difference between revisions of "2020-02-26: Solaris Site Report: Desecrated Shrine"

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Latest revision as of 20:50, 19 May 2020

SITE REPORT
SOLARIAN SPECIAL OPERATIONS COMMAND (SOLSOC)
Prepared by Lydia Seren
Authorized for release to Gebler Special Exploratory Group (SEG)
(Clearance-confirmed contractors included)

SCENE LOG:
LOCATION: Desecrated Shrine
PARTICIPANTS: 'Project Baphomet' (Lydia Seren), others
RELICS RECOVERED: A monowheel
PRE-EXPLORATION SUMMARY: Investigated into a known ruin site with Drifters.
EXPLORATION SUMMARY: I am being gracious and not leaving the capslock on! I know what that is now thanks to Leah's SCIENCE BOOKS which was a TACTICAL BLUNDER if I say so myself because now I can make my reports really annoying to read!!

It's my choice to make this report legible!

Anyway OS followed some nerds and Lanval to the desecrated shrine. In exchange for giving the nerds cake, they let us recover the future of motorized travel: The Monowheel!

*picture of a monowheel is included. It's basically a giant wheel that you drive from within the wheel. It is as stupid and wonderful as it sounds*

RECOMMENDED ACTION: After some study, I /Lydia Seren/ have discovered the means to duplicate this technology and I have managed to do this without committing a human rights abuse or torturing /anyone/. (I suggest having our science people do a study wherein they test not torturing people for a while and seeing if that improves morale and productivity and less weird science things roaming the surface)

I stayed up all night instead of sleeping and built another monowheel. Know that my humility has its limits and that I am brilliant! This is a much better method of traversing rough terrain than I've seen in a SIGNIFICANT NUMBER off your animes.

Normally I'd be like 'ugggh' at letting my captors use something this awesome but now you know that I can do a lot of cool things besides stabbing people which is, in fact, the least cool thing I can do! Ok admittedly being able to summon gods to explode things is pretty awesome and you probably were thinking of that more than the stabbing part but now you know I can build giant wheels you can ride around in.

(Thanks Rachiel for allowing me to be sensible and devote my weeks to reproducing superior Monowheel technology)

That said we should probably make sure it's safe. We should totally have Captain Loren give it a try first. Make sure it's safe for the troops!!! This is my official recommendation as a brilliant engineer.

COMMENTS: <an edit from Rachiel is added shortly after>

'Oh my gosh loren i'm so sorry ^^;;;;;;'