2018-12-21: A Destroyer, Too?

• Log: A Destroyer, Too?
• Cast: Xantia, Lily Keil
• Where: Photosphere - Domicile Level
• Date: December 21st, 2018
• Summary: Lily stumbles upon Xantia employing an uncommon level of brutality in dealing with some of the Photosphere's denizens. Distraught after the fact, Xantia is left with many questions regarding her worrisome actions, which Lily answers with plausible theories. (takes place during the Photosphere Sequence on December 1st)

---

======================<* Photosphere - Domicile Level *>======================

The Photosphere's interior is the size of a city. The majority of it is a massive cavern, honeycombed with different levels. Here, Metal Demons make their homes in hallways that have sometimes been repaired since the Photosphere crashed here in ages past. The quarters are small and cramped, stacked atop one another.

This place also holds the gathering areas that pass for centers of Metal Demon culture. Within these halls, one can find cafeterias and proving grounds. Their martial life is in abundance; armories and arenas are common, while theaters and libraries are unheard of.

The technology, suffice to say, is advanced. Tram systems lead into different parts of the Photosphere. Interior lighting and climate control makes this place comfortable, but it has an oppressive feeling for anyone from Filgaia.

BGM: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ygpjMbQeBas

<Pose Tracker> Xantia has posed.

It has been some time since the battle of the Photosphere moved mostly inside, but it's still very much in full swing. Both attackers and defenders have splintered off into groups large and small, making their respective ways through the many winding halls of the enormous, ancient structure. Even if you knew exactly where to find a particular someone, it would be hard to locate them at this point without a map or some other tool to aid in this.

It's far easier to locate where people are in general. All you have to do is follow the sounds of battle. One battle probably sounds like any other to most. Others may have enough familiarity to be able to tell certain details just by listening to those sounds. Such as the lack of a great din but each instance of impacts with metal objects being clearly audible meaning that the battle has a low number of participants. The hum of an energy weapon being swung is likely to be attributed to Metal Demons... or a very, very limited number of Drifters. A sudden loud shriek of terror-- well, one can speculate what that might mean.

All these sounds came from the same direction. There's nothing in the way of particularly notable facilities over there. It's just one of the many hallways leading to one of the many dormitories in one of the Photosphere's many levels dedicated to domiciles. The only reason why this one stands out at all, other than the sounds of battle, is the visual evidence of the battle that's already taken place here.

It appears to have been rather one-sided. Traces of human blood are present, but it's hardly noticable given the large amount of quicksilver, oozing out of recently slain Metal Beasts. The common wolf-type is clearly identifiable. It's hard to tell if there were any others, given that some of the remains have been smashed to unrecognizable pieces. Crushed sections are common on the more identifiable ones, as are severed body parts, suggesting bludgeoning as well as slashing, with a weapon that cuts far more cleanly than most.

All things considered, the identity of one of the parties involved in this battle is already suspected by that point. Let alone when it can be positively identified by the shock of red hair, visible through the smashed doorway at the end of the hall. As well as the glowing red blade emerging from the bracer on the figure's right arm... having just passed through the body of the figure standing in front of it, an insectoid Metal Demon bearing a shocked expression as the top half of their torso slides off the bottom.

<Pose Tracker> Xantia has posed.

BGM: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A-zTKIEOtvM

Xantia slowly straightens after the decisive defeat of the enemy in front of her. Relatively slowly, as what follows all happens very quickly. In front of her are two Metal Beasts, of the same type the hallway was littered with, and a female humanoid Metal Demon, her back pressed against the far wall. She looks absolutely terrified. It would take no more but a quick glance at her bearing to tell that she is far from prepared for a fight. Either a non-combatant, or a fledgling ill-prepared for a true battle. That shriek just now was undoubtedly hers.

The Beasts, however, don't hesitate. Their master slain before them, they are quick to leap to the attack, one after the other. Xantia, likewise, doesn't hesitate. A flash of red, and one Metal Beast suffers the same fate as the Demon a moment earlier, its two halves not losing their momentum as they crash to the ground some distance away. The second is caught around the throat by Xantia's left hand. Metal crumples in her grip, crushing the Beast's neck with enough force that its head comes clean off.

Flinging its lifeless body aside, Xantia sets eyes on the only other living being left in the room. Calmly, far too calmly, she takes a single step forward. With a panicked cry, the female Metal Demon finds courage in her desperation, suddenly rushing forward, intent on throwing a punch in Xantia's direction.

She never gets that far. Xantia barely even had to move. She needed only to extend her right arm forward, impaling the girl with her energy weapon with the greatest of ease. There's only a strained gurgle as she draws her arm back, followed by the Demon's collapse. Then silence.

Xantia stands motionless for a short while, before deactivating her weapon. Slowly, she raises her head upwards, though probably not looking at anything in particular. It's difficult to tell, as her eyes are not visible from this angle. She doesn't appear about to do anything else, other than simply stand there, covered in quicksilver splatters.

The only things that periodically move are her lips. The same movements, every time. What she's saying is soft and mumbled, it would be hard to tell what it is even with proficiency in reading lips. One with the power to read emotions may be able to make an educated guess, however. Because what she says mirrors the way she 'feels'.

"So cold..."

<Pose Tracker> Lily Keil has posed.

There's little time for Lily to be away from where she needs to be. In order for her plan to work, she needs to be prepared to execute it. ...But there are a few things to be done to ensure nothing interferes, and so she takes a brief journey away from the depths of the Gutter, moving quickly and purposefully. She is not looking for Xantia. ...There's something a little more fated in the noise that takes her there.

The sounds of battle continue; a pair of Metal Beasts strike for the woman in red as she steps through the domicile level; one catches fire as Lily throws out her hand, and the other as it charges meets the strange greatsword she carries, gleaming faintly in places with orange light.

Lily doesn't linger--just long enough to ensure the enemy is down, before she steps forward... and sees the evidence of battle. Something was here; Something... violent. And yet the wounds suggest something familiar...

When Lily sees Xantia, she watches the remaining battle. She could step in to help; she will, if it becomes necessary, but clearly it is not.

Xantia finishes the battle. Lily feels the emotion... But she also feels something else. Something...

"Xantia," Lily says, raising her voice. She is still holding her weapon, naturally, but she leans it against her shoulder, her red battle gear concealing any of her own blood that might have been spilled here and there. There's little time, but...

She has what she'd intended to pick up.

"Xantia," she says again, and steps forward. "Sit down."

<Pose Tracker> Xantia has posed.

Xantia doesn't respond at all to the first calling of her name. Even though it's deathly silent - there's no way she didn't hear. Unless there's something funny going on. Or, funny is definitely not the right word for this, let's put it mildly and call it 'unusual'.

The second time does prompt a response. For how quick and decisively she acted just now, this response is very sluggish, it takes a while just for her to lower her head, and turn it in Lily's direction. For once, her expression is difficult to read, most of the emotion drained from her face. Her heavy-lidded eyes just make her look extremely tired, and her generally languid body language seems to be supporting that.

Until, quite suddenly, it's as if there's a rush of warmth coming from her. Xantia blinks, slowly at first, then rapidly, her skin quickly gaining some of its lost color back. In no time at all, she's returned to feeling much more like she usually does. Cheer quickly makes its way to her features, and why wouldn't it, looking at someone she cares for quite a bit?

"...Lily? Lily!"

Xantia bounds right on over upon identifying the unexpected visitor, by now seeming much the same as always. "I saw you outside, I'm glad you still made it! Where'd you go, didn't you know the assault was today? Or was that part of the plan, I admit I get kind of distracted listening to all that."

Sooo... just not going to acknowledge anything that happened just now, apparently.

<Pose Tracker> Lily Keil has posed.

No response, then a totally different response; it's definitely consistent with some change... as is the death of the Hyadean potential noncombatant. Lily looks over Xantia as she changes, down then up. Like a switch was flipped, really.

"Yes," Lily answers, acknowledging her presence, glancing about to ensure no new enemies are along the way. Upon finding none she answers, "Of course. I needed to be here for this." She pauses, at that, and shakes her head. "I... had something that I had to do. It was part of my plan, at least. Don't worry about it for now."

She can't exactly say not to worry at all, considering, but she can pretend for the moment because--

"Xantia," Lily says. "What's the last thing that you remember, before I addressed you and you spoke to me, just now?"

<Pose Tracker> Xantia has posed.

It's generally easy to get Xantia to not worry about something, by just telling her not to worry about it. Lily's explanation seems to be plenty to satisfy her, met with a cheery "Okay~!". Like she said, Plans are not her cup of tea, knowing that Lily apparently has a good one is all she needs to know. Though she might have proceeded to babble on about whatever else came to mind afterwards, if Lily hadn't pre-empted her with a question.

And what a question. That one visibly confuses her. "The last thing? Well, I was..."

Wait a minute. That should be an easy question. Why is this something she needs to think about? It's not until now that Xantia has started to realize that something is wrong here. She looks about the room, feeling increasingly agitated. She doesn't remember how she got here. ...Or does she? There's something... something that lingers on the edge of her mind, but she can't quite get at it.

"N-no, that can't be right... I wasn't supposed to forget anything anymore. I know this, I have to know this!"

Grabbing the sides of her head as if it might help her focus, she scans the evidence of a battle on the floor... and freezes when she lays eyes upon the top half of the bisected insect Metal Demon. "That's... I've seen them before. I know I have. Where was it... where? Where?!"

Her heartbeat's quickened considerably. She's panicking. Of course she would, the thought of having possibly lost more memories is unbearable. If that can just... happen, then there's no telling what else she's forgotten about. It could be happening constantly. She could forget everything again. That's not a possibility that she knows how to deal with.

<Pose Tracker> Lily Keil has posed.

It's a little too easy, really--Lily doesn't let herself dwell on that matter, though, on what may come. She has things to do, after all. ...The first of those now ends up being to ask Xantia an important question--and her suspicions are proven correct.

Worse than she thought, really. Lily remains still, a rock in the face of Xantia's agitation, of her uncertainty. She wasn't supposed to forget... Was it unkind, to mention this?

Lily is still, and as Xantia begins to panic she says, "Xantia--It's all right." She doesn't stick with just that, however; she takes a step forward, closing the distance, reaching out to set a gloved hand on the other woman's shoulder. "Listen to me," she says. "Breathe--Slowly. It's all right."

"The reason I ask is that you were in some altered state--what just happened here is that you fought a battle, and you won it. But you were in something like a trance; you said you were cold, seemed cold. When I got your attention, you came back to yourself."

"You don't appear to be losing any memories that you already had--but I had to confirm what I saw. ...So just tell me the last clear thing you remember. It'll help."

<Pose Tracker> Xantia has posed.

In the face of something like this, that warmth that Xantia seems to naturally exude most of the time, born of her boundless cheer and optimism, is rapidly flowing away again. It seems so often like a constant, but in the end, it proves all too easy for her emotions to flip completely around. All it takes is the right trigger.

Were she in her right mind, however, she'd almost certainly not find this an unkindness. If there's one thing she's always been adamant about regarding lost memories, it's that she wants to know. Knowing that she's forgotten things is terrible, but unknowingly continuing to live a lie is even worse. As hard as this may be on her, hiding the truth from her would ultimately hurt her far more than confronting this right now.

Xantia gasps when she feels Lily's hand on her shoulder, instantly pulled back out of the recesses of her mind. She focuses on the woman in front of her, takes a moment to breathe when instructed - it takes a bit for it to actually slow down, but she's there, she's listening. The wide-eyed expression doesn't completely disappear however. She's calming down, but she's no less upset.

"A... a trance?" She latches onto that particular word from Lily's explanation. A trance. Though she'd find it hard to explain what that is exactly, having a word for it helps. It means there's a reason. That it's something different from just randomly forgetting things. It may not be a good thing, yet it's strangely reassuring. She lets out a sigh of... not relief exactly, but something close to it. She's trying her best to calm herself.

And so, when asked to tell Lily the last clear thing she remembers, she's more ready to give that an honest attempt. Though rather than do that right away, she first murmurs aloud, "A battle..." She vaguely remembers that. The fighting. Now that this has come up, something about it stands out.

"...This isn't the first time. I noticed it before. One moment I'm fighting, the next the fighting's over. The details of each fight, they just... blur together. I can't... completely remember every single fight."

Obviously she's been fighting a lot today. Things blurring together after a while might be considered normal. By most people. But not Xantia. Every single memory is precious to her. She should remember every single fight she was in, blow for blow. And she does, for the most part. Which is why she can say with certainty, "Today. It only started happening today. Why today? Is it because of this place?" Once she's reached the limit of what she can figure out on her own, she looks to Lily for the answers to the questions that remain.

<Pose Tracker> Lily Keil has posed.

If it were the first time Lily had seen it, it might be startling--but she has seen Xantia's moods shift before. And it might seem unkind in the moment, but Lily knows how important memory is to Xantia--and she knows that it's better to do what's possible now instead of waiting. There's no need to aggravate the issue twice, and there is enough time--just enough--to explore it now.

Lily is willing to wait as necessary for Xantia to at least pull out of her panic--but when she answers, the witch inclines her head. "Yes. You were acting as if you didn't entirely know where you were." It reminds her, frankly, of the description of when she was found--of what she didn't remember then.

But this...

"That's not unusual in general, but it is for you." Today. Xantia can isolate it to today... Lily is thoughtful, turning once more to check the area. "I don't know anything else that's different. This place; the battle at hand... the enemy. You've fought Metal Demons and Metal Beasts before, so they probably aren't the issue. This... place, is strange, and obviously we've never been inside before, so it could be the issue. Either something about the location itself, or the proximity to Mother. ...To my knowledge there's no toxins present, no unusual agents in the air..."

Reasoning it out, Lily looks back to Xantia. "We can hypothesize for now that it's this place. Which suggests to me that it's related to your forgotten memory--that something in your past relates to the Metal Demons and their base."

"I can't be certain, but it's the most reasonable conclusion. ...Which tells me that I think you should try to stay with a group while here if you can; someone who can pull you out of that trance, since it seems you've gone into it more than once here." Lily nods then. "I need to get back to the Gutter. Travel with me for now; we'll find some of the others before I break off."

<Pose Tracker> Xantia has posed.

It's a fair comparison to draw. This could well have something to do with the hazy details surrounding the circumstances of how she was discovered. But when Lily speaks the words 'acting as if you didn't entirely know where you were', it reminds Xantia of something else.

She stays silent however, allowing Lily to present a theory that, all things considered, would normally be another one of those things that she's far too ready to accept as fact in her mind. Perhaps not the most sound decision, but... well, she just values the insight that smart people like Lily have that highly. It's so likely to be true, there's no need to worry about whether or not it actually is. This time, however...

"--No, I was wrong. It happened once before. That time with Fargo..."

The Lacour tournament. That time when she lashed out against her opponent with sudden ferocity, managing to land what was quite nearly a mortal wound on Fargo Foobach. She remembers all of that fight, right up until getting caught in his blazing hot aura. She remembers the burning pain... and the next thing she remembers is Fargo was kneeling down, clutching that horrible wound. She freaked out. It wasn't because of how badly she injured him. It was because she didn't remember doing it.

This being the case, Xantia tries to dig deeper, to recall more instances of when this might have happened. When she comes up with nothing else immediately, she asks the obvious questions: "What does that have to do with this place? Or was that something else?" Lily seems to be on the right track. If this can be explained as well, maybe it can give her some peace of mind. At least for the time being. They do have important things to do today, any mental distractions that can be eliminated probably should be.

Xantia's mind is at least still on those matters, because while she nods to traveling with Lily for now, she does point out, "I can't go all the way though... I need to go back up." Yes, back. She was already on a higher level than this before, then she turned back again. Equal odds on whether or not there was an actual good reason for that. She only needs one reason for why she should be back up there though: "Fei's going to be there." She doesn't even mention the importance of defeating Mother. Priorities.

In a softer voice, she adds, "I'm not going to be any good down there, anyway." No explanation offered for that one.

<Pose Tracker> Lily Keil has posed.

That's another point of data--Lily, of course, was rather busy during the Lacour tournament herself, was not participating, but it makes another difference. Fargo..

"The tournament," Lily confirms. She wasn't there, but she certainly heard about what happened. Linking it to this it means... Well, the obvious question is one that Lily doesn't have an answer to immediately. So...

"I don't know enough about Fargo to be sure," Lily says. "But I recall that you were caught in an aura, that you lost control in the moment. When we get out of here, I suggest you think about commonalities between then, and now. Forms of attack that might be in common, similarities in location... or just qualities about him that were unusual." Like connections about whether Fei is involved. "It could be a similar form of attack, or it could be that both elements have to do with your past. It seems that whatever activates this state puts you in a position to keep fighting."

It may be enough for the time being. If nothing else, it definitely gets them a little further than they were before--but at Xantia's caution, Lily nods. "Of course. I can't go with you, but I'd rather one of us could keep an eye on him. ...Ethius Hesiod will be going, too." Mother is important, sure--but Fei anyway.

"We'll both be where we can be most effective," she says simply. "If we don't run into anyone on the way there, then we'll split at the branching path."

<Pose Tracker> Xantia has posed.

Not quite as definitive an answer as Xantia would have liked, but the possible connections that Lily names seem to make sense. She seems satisfied enough with that, bobbing her head in agreement, but it's not until the final sentence that she seems to latch onto something, repeating, "...to keep fighting."

She's felt like that before. She remembers that well enough. A compulsion to keep fighting, even when she felt an impulse to do otherwise. She's watched so many jump in front of others to take a hit for them. Exactly the kind of heroic act that she admires, and aspires to. Yet every single time she was in a position to do so, she didn't do it. She always felt more compelled to keep fighting the threat, rationalizing it as the sooner it goes down, the less harm it'll be able to do. She can fight, so she should keep fighting. This is something she genuinely believes. But it's never, not even once, made her feel that she directly, personally managed to save somebody.

Is it any wonder that she doesn't believe there's anything she can do for Riesenlied?

Upon dropping the name Ethius Hesiod, Xantia is quick to respond, "Oh, that's good." Unlike probably many at this point, she still trusts him. Of course she does. It would take an incredibly heinous act to lose Xantia's trust, nothing that she's seen or heard thus far qualifies as that. Besides, he's a fellow amnesiac, which gives him a natural trust advantage. That's just how that works.

Of course, that's assuming she actually heard what Lily was talking about just now. She did sound distracted when she said that, and falls quiet immediately after. Until she suddenly says something out of nowhere, for no apparent reason.

"Whoa there boys, easy. It's only a lone Drifter. I'm sure we can work something out here."

There wasn't much emotion in any of that, as if she was unprepared for a show and just reading her lines from the cue card. But that's probably not what's going on here. She may be remembering something.

<Pose Tracker> Lily Keil has posed.

That last repetition--Lily glances to Xantia, considers her, but doesn't stop. She begins to walk regardless, preparing to do exactly as they'd intended. She's sharp, as ever, prepared, still carrying the sword, and yet...

Well, Lily's used to Xantia's blind trust in many others--or at least, what seems blind to her. But she's relying on Ethius, too. ...But did Xantia actually hear it? Did the red-haired woman notice it at all? Lily watches Xantia quiet, watches her say something suddenly, without emotion. Remembering something...

Lily waits for a moment, as if to see if Xantia will continue.

"..."

Lily's eyes stay on Xantia and she tries, experimental, "Yeah? And what is it that you suggest we do?"

<Pose Tracker> Xantia has posed.

Xantia follows readily, keeping an exact pace with Lily, moving and stopping whenever so prompted. It seems automatic, her mind is clearly somewhere else at that point. Though the subject may have shifted a few times, this whole time, in the back of her mind, Xantia's been considering that one question of Lily's. 'What's the last thing you remember?'

When Lily asks her counter-question to the words she spoke, Xantia finally snaps out of her thoughts. Rather than answer, she clarifies, "The insect Metal Demon. That's what they said to me. That's the last thing I remember."

Xantia may not be very sophisticated, but she's sharp enough to realize the implications of those words being directed to her, and what happened after. Especially when combined with the fact that, when she looked at the Demon's corpse... they had their arms in the air, all four of them. Even if she can't recall the exact circumstances, when she puts it together with what they said earlier, she can only come to one conclusion. One which is probably no surprise to Lily.

"...They were surrendering. They didn't want to fight. And yet I still... why would I..."

She doesn't really look as distraught as one might expect someone under these circumstances to be. She just looks confused. Under normal circumstances, if someone doesn't want to fight, then she doesn't fight. She doesn't see why she ever would. Of course, if she fully realized just how brutally she fought back there, she'd know that these were far from normal circumstances.

Naturally, she looks to Lily for the answers in this once again. But the question she directly asks is a very specific one.

"Lily... do you think I'm a Destroyer, too?"

It's not even necessary to ask who she's talking about with that 'too'. It's Id. Of course Xantia would still have Id on her mind, even at a time like this. Or perhaps especially at a time like this.

<Pose Tracker> Lily Keil has posed.

Seeing that Xantia isn't caught up in it, Lily nods, considering the clarification. A lone Drifter... something they intended to potentially work out. And yet Xantia fought. Lily saw as much; she saw the way that one of them was trying to retreat, before Xantia still cut her down. Yes, some might be distraught... But Xantia is something else. This question--

Lily looks to Xantia still, watching her, and gives away little in her expression. She doesn't answer immediately. She doesn't have to think of who it is; it's obvious. ...In times like this...

"...We all have multiple aspects," Lily says. "You've shown yourself capable of other things--you helped put me back together, as it were. So the question isn't something that you should consider on its own."

She pauses. "...But you have the capacity for destruction, and for whatever reason, we've seen that you enter some sort of trance--once before, more often here--wherein you do exactly that. The title fits--but not the reason, the meaning."

"...I think that there may be... some amount of mental programming, so to speak, in play. Any skill we learn does that to some degree; part of what training means is to replace your instinctive reactions with a different, more effective action. By the time you finish, you don't have to think about how to act--you simply do, in the right circumstances."

"The action becomes your instinct. ...And I'm beginning to suspect that something like that is true with you. That some stimulus you can't identify causes you to react in a way that you were trained. I think we may be able to identify it, if we can piece together the similarities in when this happens."

"...So yes, you are a Destroyer. But so am I. What he meant by that... I suspect that someone trained you that way for a purpose. But without knowing more, I can't speculate more than that." She pauses, glances forward, as if thinking of something strange, and then shakes her head.

"...My point is that if we look to reasoning--to science, to understanding... Then I think we can learn the truth. And that that title isn't a complete truth itself."

<Pose Tracker> Xantia has posed.

Xantia is - or at least appears to be - entirely calm when she asks that question. Like she might be okay with that. Part of her probably would be. It would be an answer, which is infinitely preferable to having no definitive answer about who she is.

And yet... it felt like too easy an answer. All this power she has just being meant to destroy things, that can't be all there is to it, can it? Times like this however, actions such as this, consciously or not, make her wonder if maybe sometimes the easy answer might be the correct one.

Lily starts by saying everyone has multiple aspects, which immediately prompts a chuckle, and a shake of her head. It always comes back down to that, doesn't it? "Two sides of the same coin," she quotes Id once again, his most often repeated words. But it makes good enough sense. There's probably a reason why that keeps coming up.

The rest, Xantia listens more intently to, without interrupting further. Lily's reasoning goes far deeper than she's ever managed to get, even with her wildest theories. And this all seems so... possible. There was a time when she knew nothing of Ether, of her ARM, of her fighting skills. Yet it all came back to her with the right triggers. A desperate situation most commonly brought hidden potential to the surface, which all too soon would become second nature.

When she thinks about it, it's not a big leap to consider her behavior in that same regard as her powers. In which case, it would be like Lily posits - that something is telling her to act differently than she normally would. It's encouraging to hear that Lily estimates that this is something that can be figured out, because... well, she sure has no idea where to begin. All she knows is, "I'd like to keep from going into this trance again, if possible. Maybe now that I know it can happen, I can stop it from happening next time. ...unless you think it's better to let it happen, if it'll help you figure out what it could be." She chuckles again, a bit more nervously this time. It feels... odd, discussing what to do about a thing you may not be able to control at all.

In the end, what she gets is confirmation, with a caveat. That's probably the best of both worlds. That way she doesn't have to think of herself as being no good for anything except breaking things (right now) and can still feel some kind of a connection to Id through this Destroyer title. That's pretty win-win where she's concerned. So she sees no reason not the smile by the end of things.

"You're really good at figuring things out and explaining things, Lily. I think I understood most of that." This might be an attempt at humor if anybody else said it, but this being Xantia, you know that it's completely genuine. It also is when she adds, "...Thank you. I was... for a moment there, I didn't know what to do. But I think I'll be alright now. We still have important things to do, so... don't worry about me, I'll be fine."

She's only going off to fight a world-eating space alien goddess. Pretty low on her list of worrisome things, all told. Because in the end, it's still a fight. That's something she knows how to deal with.

<Pose Tracker> Lily Keil has posed.

Maybe there is another reason Lily looks to give what answers she can now, instead of later: given everything... Is there any guarantee that they'll all be together on the other side of these events? Moreso even than usual, there are risks in this.

Behavior, powers; frankly, this possibility makes a lot of it make more sense to Lily; she can't be sure she's right, but it fits the facts better than her previous suppositions. As for what Xantia says--

"Definitely do what you can to avoid it while you're alone. It might be good to try to induce it later, so that we can observe... But for right now the priority is to stay alive and finish the mission with a minimum of unnecessary casualties on either side. If we do our jobs right, we'll be able to live with the Metal Demons after this--those who remain. ...There's no guarantee, but it's better than planning to wipe them out."

Lily nods after that--she sees the smile, and--glances down, demurring slightly with a shake of her head. "I do what I can," she says. "...We all have our own skills, our own talents." But she pauses, and then says, "But... you're welcome. I'm sure that eventually you'll find the truth, and I'm sure that when you do, you'll be able to choose how to deal with it."

Lily pauses, then. Don't worry about her, hm...?

"I know. Take care of yourself, all right?"