2021-02-02: A Face for Poker
- Log: A Face for Poker
- Cast: Citan Uzuki, Gwen Whitlock
- Where: The Thames
- Date: February 02, 2021
- Summary: Gwen, still recovering from the events in Luca, receives a visit from Citan, who finds out that she still has some healing to go before she dares leave the Thames.
<Pose Tracker> Citan Uzuki has posed.
It had been clear, once the situation had 'calmed down' (for a relative degree of 'calm down', loosely applied) that none of them could remain in Luca, perhaps not even in Spira. It had been just as clear that Gwen needed medical attention.
What had followed had been a hasty evacuation from Luca on the part of the Black Wolves present at the time, covering their flight as best they could. It was fortunate that Gwen's situation, while it was one for which she needed care, was not immediately life-threatening or likely to deteriorate. They had the time they needed to escape, they just had to make good on that part of the plan.
From there, Citan had decided that the Thames -- given its more or less neutral standing politically in Aquvy -- would be the best place which to take and evaluate her condition further.
Besides, the Thames' doctors are also used to weird cases.
Even if Gwen's own -- even without the unnecessary details, of which there are many -- might be a whole different type of weird case than they're used to.
In the end, what Gwen needs is somewhere to rest where she can be monitored without too many questions... and somewhere where at least the basic equipment is on hand.
(Someone once brought the science of the IV line to the Thames decades ago. If Citan were not in fact already happily married, he may have offered to marry that person instead.)
(Even most of Ignas hasn't picked up on that particular advancement, outside of the Yggdrasil... but we digress.)
She had woken before too long after arrival and stabilization, and has remained there since. Unsurprisingly, she has been diminished from her ordeal and her strength has yet to return to her. There isn't much else that can be done by treatment alone -- at least, not in Aquvy. The rest is up to her body.
He's checked in on her from time to time since her awakening, apparently residing again for now somewhere else on the ship, but has largely left her care to the Thames' own, such that their attention is needed. Largely, she needs time to heal.
There is a knock at the door to her room. "Are you here, Gwen?" Citan calls out, apparently unwilling to walk into even a recovery room in a ship's clinic without checking first that she's... decent.
<Pose Tracker> Gwen Whitlock has posed.
It could have been mych worse, considering the stakes. If Gwen's friends and fellow altruistic-minded fellows hadn't come when they did, the situation would have been a lot worse, both for Gwen as well as for Luca.
What's good is the low-grade fever had dissipated entirely, likely having not returned when the last of Setanta's presence was sucked out. If that was, indeed, what happened.
"... Doc." Her voice is raspy, but healing well. She slowly sits up, drawing the blanket around her- not for decency, but for warmth, as she wraps it as a shawl around her.
While her body temperature was fine, measuring at levels that would be normal for someone in a healing state (or not moving around that much), she had clung to sources of heat, the itchy warmth of the blanket something she had refused to part with except for necessary examinations.
One of the crewmembers had given the courier a bandanna to wrap around her head, the red and white stripes looking comical over the similiarly loaned shirt and trousers, loose enough to fit her body, but with the discomfort of looking far too big for her frame.
"Come in, I'm decent," she says.
<Pose Tracker> Citan Uzuki has posed.
He opens the door after she says he can come in.
"How have you been feeling?" he asks her, approaching near to her bedside. He takes her in, regarding her current appearance with a clinical eye. Considering what she has experienced and survived, well.
Without understanding everything at play on the table, he can't say he would have expected better, all told. With what they have available here, the only thing left seems to be to let her body take charge. Though, he's uncertain how long that may take. Weeks? Years? Perhaps even 'never'. Without anything to compare her situation to -- at least, not fully -- it's hard to make anything more than an 'educated guess' about what lies ahead for Gwen.
He has something in his arms, which he offers to her.
"I brought this for you. I had thought that you might appreciate something to read while you are recovering."
Said book is titled, 'Guild Galad: City of Industry!'. The... exclamation point is part of the title. Did Citan really just pick out a book that appealed to him?
Maybe it's the thought that counts at moments like these. At least he didn't get her that copy of 'Snakes with Tradition'. ...Whatever that was about.
He takes a seat at the bedside after.
"The doctor told me that you have been taking walks," he says to her. "This is all well and good, but please take care not to overextend yourself, Gwen. You have what may be a long recovery ahead of you."
<Pose Tracker> Gwen Whitlock has posed.
"Better. Appetite's mostly back." The trash is full of its share of corn husks and other types of wrappers; as weak as she has been, she keeps her area as clean as she can manage. "... Is everyone okay? Has anyone found Ida? What about you? You healin' okay? Did you see Fei? Is he doin' okay? Does he still wanna punch me? Because I'd be okay with that."
'Did anyone die' is the question her face seems to ask, her face straining from worry, as well as fear.
Which has been another sign of things returning to 'normal', though at great expense.
"Did anyone in Luca... did they figure out the fire demon was me? I screwed a lot of stuff up, with the war, n' everything... I shouldn't have helped scout in my state, but I didn't think it'd be a problem..." She trails off, her head hanging low.
Which is likely the best moment for Citan to present to her a book, which distracts her from her downward spiral of thoughts.
Gwen smiles, genuinely touched by the gesture. "Thank you. You picked pretty well."
It could have been worse. He could have picked out the same worn Granasian prayer books that Gwen had to deal with as possible reading choices as a child. Thankfully, there was always something else she could concentrate on.
Like a book about Guild Galad.
"My auntie had this book. Or maybe it was another one." She takes the book with her right hand, clasping onto it with no difficulty.
Hearing Citan's caution, Gwen asks back onto the cot with a soft exhale of breath. "Yeah. Too restless. I wanna see what happened, like, if I could do anything. I don't like being here, knowing there's people hurt out there because of what I did."
<Pose Tracker> Citan Uzuki has posed.
"Is it, now? That is good to hear! A healthy appetite is the first step on the road to recovery," Citan remarks, rubbing his chin thoughtfully. But Gwen goes on, and it all comes out in a torrent of sorts--
His own expression falters, tilting towards something far more serious than before.
"I am fine," is what he leads with, since it's the thing he is best-equipped to answer for. "Fortune was on my side, it seems. I was only barely hurt in that... confrontation." Despite nearly (actually) getting hit by a broken pillar, it seems. "As for Fei... I had meant to ask if he had paid you a visit, but it seems you have answered it for me! ...I cannot speak for Fei, but he was..." Citan hesitates for a moment, as if uncertain whether to continue. "...you know as well as I do what Fei has endured. He was afraid of losing you, as well. I believe he will forgive you, but..." He looks away, shaking his head. "...I would speak to him as soon as you can, if I were you. Fei is... in possession of a fragile heart, one might say."
Which then gives him the opportunity to speak of other things:
"I do not believe anyone has died... but I am unaware of what has happened to I-- Miss Everstead-Rey. We departed from Spira with you as soon as we could. Similarly, I am ill-equipped to speak of Luca. I suspect they do not realize it was you, however."
At least, even if he had picked a book he had found more appealing than the rest he's at least given her something potentially interesting (it had been slim pickings at the Thames flea market, where books are concerned; those Granasian prayer books are legion there and he is... slightly less inclined to select one of those).
"..." He looks up at the ceiling of all places, as she says that she's feeling restless.
"Gwen," he says at last. "Your only 'job' right now is to recover. Should you happen to relapse or even worsen, how do you think Fei and the others might feel?"
<Pose Tracker> Gwen Whitlock has posed.
"That's good." Gwen seems relieved, her eyes becoming wet. "I'm so glad you were there. My memories are jumbled, 'specially early on, but I remember you. You kept your cool during all of it. It was... really impressive. Your poker face, I mean."
It's still a compliment.
"... Yeah. I've been lettin' people come on their own terms. I've seen Hiro around too. Not sure if you knew him by name but he was the young guy with the dark hair and the wind magic." Which may not be all that descriptive, so she continues, "with the pink baby dragon."
Turning her thoughts back to Fei, Gwen wraps the blankets around her tighter. "He's got a good heart, in spite of the stuff he's been through." Sudden fear prickles down her back as Id's words come back to her. "Yeah, there were some... weird exchanges that happened, before that. LIke, to do with the mind, and stuff. I should tell him... that..."
The second half of her sentence doesn't come, as she realizes that it wouldn't make sense without context.
"I remember something about Id, bein' in my thoughts," she begins, slowly. "Something about... Fei, and scarecrows..." Fei's body, his neck broken, strung out as a warning against approaching crows. "I need to tell... _him_ him, that... I ain't... I ain't a psychic." She's shrunken back at this point, the whites of her eyes more visible. "...."
She closes her eyes, and shakes her head. ".... Sorry. Guess I got my own things I gotta let heal a little, first. It ain't Fei's fault. Sorry if I'm not makin' any sense."
Maybe, in a better world, Citan will smile and nod, as if he understood exactly what Gwen meant, as if he knew all of Fei's secrets, and lacked any ability to disguise it.
But in that world, he wouldn't be here, would he? Gwen's certain of it.
Because who could keep such secrets from everyone, including her own?
"... I hope Ida's okay." The lack of quantifiable news still manages to sate some of Gwen's thirst for information. "Thank you for gettin' me here, Doc.'
As he gazes up at the ceiling, Gwen follows his gaze up as well, still looking upwards as he begins to speak.
"... Right, right. I ain't gonna leave just yet. N' if I do, I'll tell you." oh god she's not listening at all is she
<Pose Tracker> Citan Uzuki has posed.
"Was I?" the doctor muses, glancing over at Gwen. He then lifts a hand to rub at his chin. "To be quite honest, I had been quite worried at the time. I suppose I simply have some experience in 'keeping my cool', so to speak."
She mentions she's had a few visitors, in particular a young man named Hiro. "Hiro... yes, I believe I saw him then. Have I seen him before? --Is that truly a baby dragon? I had heard that dragons are quite rare." She's gotten his interest now, it seems.
Though perhaps there won't be the opportunity to discuss it too much at depth, as Gwen remarks on Fei, and in particular--
"..."
Citan watches her for a long moment, silent on the matter.
"...I see." He pauses a moment. "Yes, perhaps you ought to rest some more, first. At the time, you were... altered, one might say. Perhaps the same is so with your recollection of the event."
Similarly he may not be the beacon of hope when it comes to Ida:
"I do not know. Should I hear more, I will pass along word," he says, shaking his head.
"...You are quite welcome, Gwen." It's said at a remove from the statement about Ida, his gaze tilting her way for a moment before turning up at the ceiling. One of the pipes is leaking, he notes in passing; he should mention it later.
And then Gwen says something that prompts him to just... sigh. "Gwen... when I had said 'you must rest'..." He smiles, though, if in a helpless 'what can I do' sort of way. "Still, I cannot stop you. But please, take care. Fei would be quite upset if anything were to happen to you."
<Pose Tracker> Gwen Whitlock has posed.
"You can be worried and keepin' your cool at the same time. You helped get people out of danger at a time when a lot of us, me included, were either out or still recoverin' from either the fumes I was conjurin' or the Stranger's influence. Unless... you didn't feel anything at all from that."
On the topic of Hiro, Gwen chuckles. "Well, I ain't sure, but she claims she is, so I just call her that, because I don't know any better. I haven't really seen anything else similar t'her, so. I'm sure, if you were to ask her someday, she'd tell you anything she knows. It won't be much, I'm afraid." So cruel of Gwen, to dash a scholar's dreams before they even had a chance to expand!
As the topic moves onto Fei, specifically the matter of their conflicts, Gwen nods. "I do want to see him, though. Just, when he feels ready. I gotta apologize to him. He put his all into tryin' to get me back, and I pretty much threw it in his face, I realize, when I was tryin' to get everyone out." Her perception *was* altered, at the time. But she still remembers Id, and she still remembers how Fei, not Id, punched her, angry that she was trying to handle it all on her own.
Hearing Citan's assumedly exasperated sigh, Gwen lets out hoarse giggle. "Relax, I didn't say it'd be tomorrow. Or the next day, even. I'm just saying that I'm not plannin' on leavin' without letting you know first. I owe you that much." Her gaze softens. ".... Besides, I... think I need to stay here, if just so people can come see me on their own terms. What I did... it doesn't matter how aware of it I was, or what parts I was trying to reach out, or whatever. I hurt people, and I can't force people to come walking up to me and pretend nothing happened."
She closes her eyes.
".... It was... real scary. I was afraid the Stranger would take you all in, when he came. Whatever he touches, he doesn't let go. I don't think he's done with me, and even if he was... he's still got Lan." She looks down at her hands, shoulders softly falling under the sagging fabric of the blanket. "Lan and I kept each other afloat, even when he had us fight each other. We resolved we'd make the best of things. She had to go through some real stressful things lately, seein' me become the way I am, included. The Stranger has a purpose for her. For me, I think, he wanted me to use that ARM to convert that energy for him to use. That's what happened, at the end. But in order for that t'happen, I had to be constantly pushing myself, further and further. Like... tempering a piece of metal, I think, if that makes any sense." Fog blue eyes turn up towards Citan, showing the emotion she had lacked up until the moment she had woke up, days ago: fear.
"He once called me the godmother of the rope that would drag her from the waters of this world, after we fought. N' that, should she realize some kinda ability, she'd be the strongest of us. He didn't say Lan by name, but I'm pretty certain he meant Lan. I don't think this was the end, but the beginning, of something big." Gwen tugs the blanket closer around her. ".... I was... an incubator. No, a furnance. .. was refining something he needed, into something he could take, when the time was right. He probably has some plan for Lan."
<Pose Tracker> Citan Uzuki has posed.
Citan shakes his head. "I, too, was affected by that power you held within you. Perhaps it affected me somewhat differently than the others," he explains, before looking away from her.
'Begone,' he had said to that phantom, before the world had returned to its proper bearings.
"It is fortunate that we were able to bring the situation under control. I do not think many were badly hurt."
He can't be sure, though.
On the subject of Hiro -- and Ruby -- Citan is prompted to sigh. "I... see. So you are not certain... and neither is she." He fidgets with his spectacles a moment, then shakes his head. "There is no helping such a thing..."
Fei had been distraught. There was no better word for it. He had seen him in such a state before, now and again, but... "From what I know of Fei, I believe he would be ready to see and speak with you at any time." He doesn't look at her. "I do not believe his impulse was... incorrect, as it were. The form in which it took, yes. But the emotion itself..."
Which might be as close to the castigation of Gwen's decision then as Citan will get in this moment.
Gwen, of course, laughs at his mild exasperation, then clarifies what she meant. "Oh! Yes, that would be more acceptable," the doctor remarks, shaking his head. "I admit I had been concerned that you were..."
Being reckless again, perhaps?
"I am glad that you are taking the matter seriously, Gwen."
Which she is because, as she says, it was scary.
What was done to her. And she isn't the only one so affected.
Gwen had mentioned Lan before, and Lan is not unknown to him. "She is... still under his sway?" He glances down, a frown on his lips. "...I see. And there is no way to remove such an influence." He pauses. "Not... easily. And not by any means we possess."
In another place entirely, it might be possible. But that would put Lan in a very different sort of danger.
"..." He glances over at Gwen, meets that terrified gaze of hers. Citan Uzuki sighs then, almost wearily.
"...Here, then, is what we must do, you and I," he tells her, gaze returning to the ceiling.
"We must watch over Lan. Perhaps there is some way to discern what his plans for her might be. Perhaps you, having been affected by him, might have some inkling about his plans. For now, there is little we can do for her, unless you desire to be Lan's jailor, Gwen."
<Pose Tracker> Gwen Whitlock has posed.
"Oh," Gwen says, somehow more horrified at this than when she had vaguely assumed he was simply not as affected.
It's the same outcome, but it forces Gwen to realize just the amount of power she had, all without the control that would have held such a situation back.
"Nah, he wasn't incorrect." Gwen shakes her head slowly, her eyes sad. "I'm glad he was there. N' that he didn't hold back." Id, on the other hand, is Id.
Citan relates his concerns, and Gwen gives him another small, but weaker smile. "I'm tryin' to keep my mind off it all, really. I have to keep my strength up anyway; if I don't, it'll be even harder to move around 'cause of my ARM. Even after a few days of lying in bed, it was like movin' around with a lead weight strapped to me." She pauses, sheepishly running her right fingers over her bandanna instinctively. "Which... I kinda do."
Citan would know for himself as a dovctor the condition Gwen's body has to be in at her most normal; underneath her clothing, her muscles work to carry the weight of her ARM, as well as subconsciously offset the effect it has on her balance. As well as how much it takes for her body to maintain it, a cost offset by the ARM's abilities to maintain her endurance, and energy.
A careful balance, just as any body would be, in the end.
"Yeah, unless something's changed between the last time I saw her. And no, there isn't." She seems to see through to the hidden meaning inbetween Citan's words. "... If you mean tech like Veruni or Solaris, it's possible, but likely the costs would greatly outweight any gains. It wouldn't be something where she could turn to Guardians, either. Setanta themselves said that the ember I gained would be able to purify the Stranger's curse, if I'd 'stoke the flames', but they're an unrealiable source of info for that. And... at the time, they wanted me to suffer the consequences, until they realized just who I was. And when they did.... I don't think they wanted to see me hurt."
No one should be able to hold a fragment of that power and live, for long. Gwen's curse and her ARM bought her time, but it would have killed her, before long. Or, likely, she might simply live on, as an eternal ember, her humanity and memory burnt away. Or something somehow even worse than those two.
"I will do it." I, not we. As she says this, the fear begins to leave her, receding the moment she finds her control. "... And I don't mean it in the same way I meant it when Fei slapped me. I'm already in his grip, so it'd be natural that I'd be the one to keep being there for her. If I can make sense of something, I'll try to tell you, or someone else who could get the word out. But know that I can't keep from falling under again." She itches her cheek, her lips in a straight line, determination in her gaze. "When the time comes, you're gonna have to yank me back. But don't lose faith in me. I'll still be there. I know that's something I'm capable of, now. Like any good courier, as like as I have some place to go to, I'll find a way to get there."
Somehow, it doesn't seem like she's kidding when she makes that analogy.
<Pose Tracker> Citan Uzuki has posed.
"Indeed..." runs his response, as she speaks about her need to keep her strength up all the more because of her ARM. Many would assume off-hand that a prosthesis like hers would be the way to gain some sort of super-strength; while there are certain advantages to the arm, there are also limitations. Limitations due to her body, for one: most of her is still flesh and blood, and the ARM can only cover so much ground. And then there are the limitations due to her ARM. There's the fact that she needs to compensate for its mass.
And then there's the fact that it's keeping her alive, and it requires energy to do so, energy that it borrows from the rest of Gwen.
"I cannot speak for what may happen in the days and weeks to come, but I believe if you rest and eat properly, you should recover," is the best advice he can give, because there are too many unknown unknowns.
Which is also the case with 'the Stranger' and the effect he has wrought upon both young women.
"Yes," he says, his voice quiet, when Gwen supposes the Veruni or Solaris might be able to do something. "I strongly suspect Solaris might. To deliver her to them, though... I do not wish to think we are that desperate."
To say nothing of Lan's escape from Solaris' clutches already -- a fact of which he's aware. But is Solaris aware of what has slipped through their fingers, or is she just another wayward Lamb to them?
"After what happened in Luca, regardless of what caused it," Citan says, readjusting his glasses, "I am... shall we say, 'disinclined' to trust what the Primarch has said. Moreover, if it is true... would the Guardians not be similarly capable of such a feat? I admit of course that I am not... entirely well-versed in the fine details when it comes to their abilities, however." The Baskar are wary of outsiders asking a great many questions, and for good reasons.
Gwen comes to a particular decision.
She'll do it, she says. Which is to say, she'll keep watch on Lan, possibly because no one else is in the precise position to do so. "I see... so you will watch Lan, but you acknowledge that you may fall under his sway again. So," and he cannot quite keep that faint if somewhat bitter smile off his face, "am I to understand I should watch you in turn? 'Who will watch the watchers', indeed..." He sighs, a distant look in his eyes for the moment. But he shakes his head.
"...Alright, then," he says at last, after apparently considering the matter set before him for a time. "I will do it. I believe I should be capable of keeping an eye on all of you."
Gwen isn't the only one he's keeping tabs on, after all.
<Pose Tracker> Gwen Whitlock has posed.
<poem> Gwen smiles, at the last part, the light in it somehow reaching her eyes. "Not only you, of course. But, you have a pretty unique position, you gotta admit, bein' the closest thing I have to a doctor." She clears her throat. "So. I promise to make things as easy as I can on you, doc. I think Fei needs your attention most of all, seeing as how you have gotten wrapped up as you have with his life."
She never did think about it, but funny how that all came about. And how fortunate.
"Just have faith in me, most of all. I always deliver my packages. And if I need to deliver myself... well, what sort of courier would I be to not be able to do that?"