User:Hats
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Hats is only on fire some of the time.
Hats doesn't sleep, he waits.
Hats only comes once a year, but twice on leap years.
Hats stays crunchy, even in milk.
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When you can find Hats
At a hat store. Also, evenings and weekends EST; don't even ask him to MUSH from work, lest the "In" tray on his desk also devour your succulent flesh.