2017-08-26: Operation Bunny Hop: Difference between revisions

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*'''Where:''' Kislev-Aveh Front
*'''Where:''' Kislev-Aveh Front
*'''Date:''' 2017-08-26
*'''Date:''' 2017-08-26
*'''Summary''': ''Kahm Yugh gathers a team of elite Solaris operates to retrieve an MVP being "escorted" by Nightburn. They are joined by an Element.''
*'''Summary''': ''Kahm Yugh gathers a team of elite Solaris operatives to retrieve an MVP being "escorted" by Nightburn. They are joined by an Element.''


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Revision as of 23:33, 28 August 2017


=============================<* Kislev-Aveh Front *>==============================

The frontlines of the Kislev-Aveh War have shifted many times in the last few hundred years, but they have left their scars on the land. One can, of course, find fighting between their infantry and Gears here. Such places are dangerous, and most Drifters know to steer away from them. However, sometimes there is no choice; even the rail lines thought to be away from the front can get caught unawares by a patrol, and skirmishes have resulted in delays and death for those trying to get to the Badlands.

The areas not currently being fought in are also dangerous. Deserters and monsters alike can wander them, and the dry, dusty land leaves little succor for those in need. To make matters worse, abandoned fortifications and trenches make an excellent hiding place for the bandits seeking to profit here. Drifters are sometimes drawn here, though, to either fight for one side or to excavate abandoned ARMs and Gears left behind in a battle. This sort of salvage work is risky, but the rewards can be great.

BGM: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YxynM-xwLUs
<Pose Tracker> Kahm Yugh has posed.

The situation in Milama hasnt gotten any better. Though the Kislevi forces on their own werent enough to warrant a change in the usual stalemate at the border, the addition of the Golem designated as Sado had tipped the scales in their favor-for now.

Operationally, Gebler was still trying to gather information on the entitys capabilities before launch a full counterassault, but had precious little time to do say. They at least knew its firing range extended far beyond anything Kaiser Sigmund had in his retinue, given the loss of a transport craft that had been flying at a previously safe altitude above of the fray.

Presently, another transport speeds along at low altitudes, carrying a crew intended to address the particular issue. Inside, Captain Kahm Yugh drummed off the mission parameters to a total audience of Just Loren Voss (hey, they didnt have a lot of time) as the pilots warned of incoming turbulence.

Our orders are to infiltrate the battlefield and determine the status of one Doctor Royce Gerune. If hes alive, we extract him. If hes not alive, we extract...well, whatevers left. The Captain said, eyeing the orders with no small degree of haste. Command is quite keen on this little incident not blowing up in our faces back home, so theyve arranged for an additional...ah, specialist to meet us on the ground.

Kahm is not trying to be coy. His guess at who they sent is as good as anyone elses. Strap yourself in, its going to get bumpy from here on out.

Some subsequent fast flying subject everyone to a bit more discomfort than they might like. Outside, the battle rages: Gears clash from afar and up close, artillery shells shake the air, and somewhere in the background looms the Golem Sado, presiding over all like some sort of mad maestro. A collapsing gear nearly takes the craft with it save for a quick left bank, and the pilots manage to land and deploy the exit ramp with all due haste.

Lets move! Kahm shouts, out of his seat and down the ramp before hes said his last syllable.

ELSEWHERE

Doctor Royce Gerune pulled himself from the wreckage of his former conveyance with a mounting sense of indignation. The crew had certainly done their due diligence in giving their lives to shield his body from the impact, but that was no excuse for abysmally dirty his robes had gotten.

No, no, no. This wont do at all. The man chided as he surveyed the ongoing battle amongst man and machines, My research is far too important to be waylaid by such small matter.

You there! Gerune commands, pointing at a group of passing (Or fleeing) drifters as he beats a path towards them, I demand you escort me from this travesty immediately!

<Pose Tracker> Loren Voss has posed.
Retreat following the completion of mission objectives within the temple had been...
Well.
Suffice to say, it had been the third time that Loren Voss, medical officer, had no choice but to cross an active battlefield, featuring carpet bombing, on foot. In one day.
He's doing just fine, honest!
There's no such thing as a job being complete, though. Particularly under current circumstances. They've already lost one transport craft due to the bombardments from the Kislev side of the three-way battlefield, and things are bound to only get worse from here, particularly as long as that golem stays active. Pulled away from the medical bay to receive urgent commands, Loren hasn't missed that he's the only one being briefed at the moment.
...Bad situation, isn't it.
The only good news so far is that he's been able to suit up and resupply. He'll need it, if the target is injured or, well.
Worse than injured. There's always biosampling...
"...Understood, Captain."
And then a heavy bombardment just about ends this mission before it even starts. Emperor.
Somehow, they make a landing; there's little time to even respond to Kahm as he bolts down the ramp so Loren doesn't even try -- he just follows.
A specialist. Nothing to do but see who command dug up this time.
<Pose Tracker> Seraphita has posed.
Amidst the many Gears fighting, one might have stood out; a bit shorter than others, but definitely wider and longer, the winged lion Grandgrowl had arrived moments earlier, breaking out of its near-supersonic flight to mow through a line of Kislev Gears. Reading as a Solarian unit to its allies, and rather clearly identified as some kind of commander too, it had swayed, at least momentarily, the flow of battle in favor of Aveh and Gebler, before a timely rampage from the Golem put the clocks back on time. Easy come easy go, seems that applies to edges in war too.
The Gear swoops in overhead, a gust of wind blowing sand and dust all over the area - it slows, it descends, the lion's four paws hitting the ground by the landing site Loren and Kahm had found themselves at after leaving their transport. The cockpit swings open without skipping a beat.
There's a blond man there, with sparkling blue eyes and the pristine white uniform of a high Gebler officer. Everything indicates for all but a moment that this is your specialist. Then he... steps aside, and bows like a butler?
Enter Seraphita, hopping out of the cockpit after him - literally, hopping out, taking a leap to the ground, then another, and giggling madly. She looks back at her Gear, shouting. "TAKE CARE OF KITTY WHILE I'M BUSY, OKAY! HE LIKES TO BE FED OTHER PEOPLE'S GEARS!" The blond man nods, re-enters Grandgrowl, and then takes it back to the battlefield.
Seraphita lunges towards Kahm and Loren, landing in a half-crouch and staring up at the two men. "Hi! I'm Seraphita, nice to meet you! I'm here for the confer denture mission!" That's probably close enough.
<Pose Tracker> Nightburn Acklund has posed.


STILL ELSEWHERE

Amidst the chaos, these Drifters have their own priorities. "Save yourself, man!" "We don't have room for dead weight that might get us killed." "Actually, you're dressed awfully funny...do you think this guy might actually be worth something?"

Before the situation can dissolve from bad to worse, the click of a resolver can be heard. "There's no need for this to dissolve into petty brigandry. Keep walking in the other direction and I'll pretend I didn't just hear you say that." Holding the leader of these ragtag refugees at gunpoint is a man whose poise is completely unlike the others. The gun pressed to the base of the leader's skull is a clear threat, but Nightburn Acklund's fierce gaze sweeps through the cronies to advise them that he has more where that came from if they make any sudden movements. "Keep walking. Don't turn around. ...Now I'm going to count to twenty, and if I can still see you jackals when I'm done, I'm bringing a few hides home with me."

These Drifters were already spooked before they got here. It doesn't take much in the way of threats to get them moving again.

"Now...you said you were trying to escape this battlefield, right? Follow along and do exactly what I say. No questions. If you don't duck when I tell you to, you're probably going to be a dead man." The convenient arrival of one Nightburn Ackland, Drifter Extraordinare, offers a compelling angle for getting out of this place alice.

<Pose Tracker> Kent Hauch has posed.

Then, the nightmare truly begins...?

"Should we have linked up with the boss?"

"Boss never told us to link up. We gotta stay with the little guy."

"It's true. Especially because of explosions."

"I'll kick an explosion's ass."

"I don't think most explosions have an ass but like philosophically I think that means an explosion is also nothing but ass."

"What do you think, little guy?"

Todd's hand drops on the shoulder of the man the two Todds have been following for the last thirty minutes. The extremely old man, a refugee just trying to get away from the battle lines, looks up at him with terror in his face and a quiver in his bones.

"Man war puts a lot of years on you, just like the man on the corner yelled!"

MEANWHILE, BACK AT THE X-FILES BASE

Two massively muscular, square-headed dotted outlines blink to either side of Loren Voss.

<Pose Tracker> Elhaym van Houten has posed.

In the middle of the battlefield, consulting a brass pocketwatch, is a woman wearing a gas mask. She is crouching behind a flipped over supply wagon and is listening to the symphony around her, but very few people waste bullets on supply wagons unless they are like, super cool, and totally showing you how much they don't care, and how no, their morale isn't about to smash like green wood and catch fire, DAD.

Parbody's suit is still dapper, though there are a few specks of dust here and there.

She stands up from behind the wagon, which was probably a backup navigation point, and strolls forwards, black tie in the breeze, to meet the landing group. A stray bullet whizzes through some slightly unruly black hair. Rather than call a greeting, Parbody just raises one gloved hand to wave hello. It has a sardonic air.

DG: A party led by Kahm Yugh is now entering The Battle Front.
DG: Party formation is now over. An Entry Challenge will now be drawn and displayed to the party.
=============================<* The Battle Front *>=============================
====================<* CHALLENGE - Artillery Bombardment *>=====================
|Type: Entry       |Dungeon Ability: Agility   |Challenge Rating: 3          | 
---------------------------< Challenge Information: >---------------------------
 The vicinity of the Guardian Temple has turned into a full-blown war zone. A  
 rush of Kislevi forces and a counter-action by Aveh forces have resulted in   
 an enormous fight between infantry, Gears, and support vehicles. In the       
 distance, you can make out where the enormous Kislevi-controlled Golem is     
 sending huge gouts of energy into the ranks of Aveh's forces. This is truly   
 worrisome, but a more immediate concern presents itself.                      
                                                                               
 One side has chosen this moment to begin an artillery bombardment. Shells     
 rain down near your position, huge fireballs and blasts of shrapnel hurtling  
 at you, posing a severe threat as you try to make your way westward.          
=Dungeon Conditions: Slow, Suffer=============================================
<Pose Tracker> Kahm Yugh has posed.

<NIGHTBURN>--------------------------------<GEBLER> (Currently, the group does not have sight of Nightburn)

The Solarian researcher seemed more....annoyed than fearful by the threatening overture from the drifters. Fortunately, the timely intervention of Nightburn meant that stiff upper lip didn't need to come down to a test. "Hmph, at least some of you have a base sense of manners." Gerune offers, making no adjustment in tone. "..Very well, I shall allow you to lead me out of this circus. There may even be a hefty reward in it for you if i'm feeling chipper about it."

Lambs enjoyed material rewards, he'd read that in a guidebook to the surface.

No sooner does he agree to follow Nightburn does the ground begin shaking with artillery fire, but the man at least has enough survival instinct to do as he was instructed, and stick close. "I say, is that that unknown that shot us down?!" He shielded his eyes as he caught view of Sado in the background. "Remarkable! I must have it captured for study!"

<Pose Tracker> Kahm Yugh has posed.

<NIGHTBURN>--------------------------------<GEBLER> (Currently, the group does not have sight of Nightburn)

The Solarian researcher seemed more....annoyed than fearful by the threatening overture from the drifters. Fortunately, the timely intervention of Nightburn meant that stiff upper lip didn't need to come down to a test. "Hmph, at least some of you have a base sense of manners." Gerune offers, making no adjustment in tone. "..Very well, I shall allow you to lead me out of this circus. There may even be a hefty reward in it for you if i'm feeling chipper about it."

Lambs enjoyed material rewards, he'd read that in a guidebook to the surface.

No sooner does he agree to follow Nightburn does the ground begin shaking with artillery fire, but the man at least has enough survival instinct to do as he was instructed, and stick close. "I say, is that that unknown that shot us down?!" He shielded his eyes as he caught view of Sado in the background. "Remarkable! I must have it captured for study!"

DG: Kahm Yugh has contributed a Agility Basic Action toward his party's challenge, Artillery Bombardment.
<Pose Tracker> Loren Voss has posed.
Scratch that previous evaluation of their assistance. Command sent an Element. The Gear alone would settle it -- they're about to have one of the Commander's elite assisting them. Loren somehow manages to stand up that much straighter, a slight nervous knot somewhere in the pit of his gut. If they make any mistakes...
Death or glory, the only options.
He salutes on cue and...
And...
This ends up being held an embarrasingly long moment as Seraphita, Fire Element, makes her appearance.
If there's any response writ briefly in Loren's gaze alone (the rest of his expression at least doesn't so much as twitch) after Seraphita introduces herself and introduces a malapropism into the mix, it could be approximately translated as 'oh no'.
"...Pleased to be of assistance, ma'am."
Because you learn and you learn fast to toe the line among superior officers with career-ending capabilities, however they might act.
And it looks like that's not the only support they have, as a glance Parbody -- didn't Elly mention her once? -- appears.
But there's little time to reckon with this. "--Incoming!"
It's... shouted a moment too late, as something explodes too close for safety's sake. "--No tagging?" Great. This is going to be an incredible mission already. But there's no use dithering about it. Sliding his faceplate down, Loren breaks into a run, putting some distance between himself and the Captain. No use risking mission failure because of a direct mortar strike on their little group.
DG: Loren Voss has contributed a Agility Basic Action toward his party's challenge, Artillery Bombardment.
<Pose Tracker> Seraphita has posed.
"Captain Kahm! Lieutenant Loren!" Seraphita parrots, memorizing the names. She rises from her half-crouch, reaching to grab their hands and shake up and down with enough enthusiasm to break an arm. "I don't have a cool title like that! Hey, hey, can I be the right tenant if Loren is the left one?" Her eyes twitch in anticipation of the answer, though the fact she stares at Kahm with sparkles in her eyes is probably even more telling of her desire for this. Oh but alas, there's no time for this awkward silence to last.
A shell craters the ground, and Seraphita is sent flying, whirling in the air - no, no, that wasn't the explosion, she just jumped. Now she's doing cartwheels, which probably doesn't help her keep up with the other two, but looks really cool.
"Hi, what's your name? And do you know why we can't play tag?" she asks Parbody, her question fragmented and spoken in three bursts due to the cartwheeling and only speaking when her head is upright. Which probably doesn't HELP comprehension in the slightest.
DG: Seraphita has contributed a Agility Basic Action toward her party's challenge, Artillery Bombardment.
DG: Nightburn Acklund has contributed a Agility Basic Action toward his party's challenge, Artillery Bombardment.
<Pose Tracker> Elhaym van Houten has posed.

Parbody inclines two fingers towards Kahm, then raise them to the top of one of her gas mask's tinted lenses. At this point the ground starts exploding, and Parbody considers this a form of encouragement.

She makes a snorting sound in her mask when Seraphita bunny hops away. Then the bunnywoman lasts near her. She answers with a sort of overembellished parody of an upper class drawl. "Parbody, darling. We can't play tag because there's an artillery bombardment on, and it wouldn't be fair. Later, perhaps; later."

Parbody does not play tag later.

She does start to run. The reinforced metal kickin' boots she has on clatter and rattle lightly beneath her natty black slacks. She sweeps one arm out, symbologically invoked mist rising up as if to veil them.

There isn't a lot of it.

"Not much water in the air around here, is there! Must be the pirates stealing it!" Parbody declares. Seraphita probably hears her fine on account of her big ol' ears.

DG: Elhaym van Houten has used her Tool Sassy Boots toward her party's challenge, Artillery Bombardment.
=============================<* The Battle Front *>=============================
====================<* CHALLENGE - Artillery Bombardment *>=====================
|Type: Entry       |Dungeon Ability: Agility   |Challenge Rating: 3          | 
---------------------------< Challenge Information: >---------------------------
 The vicinity of the Guardian Temple has turned into a full-blown war zone. A  
 rush of Kislevi forces and a counter-action by Aveh forces have resulted in   
 an enormous fight between infantry, Gears, and support vehicles. In the       
 distance, you can make out where the enormous Kislevi-controlled Golem is     
 sending huge gouts of energy into the ranks of Aveh's forces. This is truly   
 worrisome, but a more immediate concern presents itself.                      
                                                                               
 One side has chosen this moment to begin an artillery bombardment. Shells     
 rain down near your position, huge fireballs and blasts of shrapnel hurtling  
 at you, posing a severe threat as you try to make your way westward.          
=Dungeon Conditions: Slow, Suffer=============================================
========================<* The Battle Front - Round 1 *>========================
======================< Results - Artillery Bombardment >=======================
Player                               Exhaustion                      Pass/Fail
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Kahm Yugh                           0 --(12)--> 12                 Fail
Rush                                0   Agility Effects: BASIC                
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Loren Voss                          0 --(13)--> 13                 Fail
Rush                                0   Agility Effects: BASIC                
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Seraphita                           0 --(13)--> 13                 Fail
Rush                                0   Agility Effects: BASIC                
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Nightburn Acklund                   0 --(16)--> 16                 Fail
Rush                                0   Agility Effects: BASIC                
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Elhaym van Houten                   0 --(9)--> 9                   Pass
Sassy Boots                         2   Agility Effects: Stalwart             
-----------------------------------< Party >------------------------------------
Leader: Kahm Yugh                   0 --(10)--> 10                 Fail
Conditions: Slow(2)|Suffer
Effects: Stalwart(1)
===============================< Dream Chasers >================================
DG: The party led by Kahm Yugh has failed this challenge! The party gained 10 exploration! If anyone needs to use party management
commands, do so now. Otherwise, the next round's GM may begin the next round with +dungeon/draw.
DG: Kahm Yugh has drawn a new Challenge.
=============================<* The Battle Front *>=============================
=======================<* CHALLENGE - Pre-Graverobbers *>=======================
|Type: Exploration |Dungeon Ability: Combat    |Challenge Rating: 1          | 
---------------------------< Challenge Information: >---------------------------
 Some bandits do not wait for the battle to be over, before they begin the     
 grisly business of looting the dead. As you move to the edge of the fight,    
 you find a group of bandits that are not waiting long at all. Clad in heavy   
 desert garments, toting Gunsmoke ARMs, they see you -- and drop bloodied      
 bags of loot, before lifting their guns and opening fire.                     
=Dungeon Conditions: Bad Luck, Tire===========================================
<Pose Tracker> Nightburn Acklund has posed.

Moving swiftly along the ground while planning his route with a civilian in mind, Nightburn only returns the banter when they have a moment to catch a breath between sprints. "Heh. Can't say manners have much of a place in a warzone like this. I'd offer you a cigar, but we're having enough trouble not getting bombed as it is." It's a rarity for Nightburn to go without one of his precious smokes, but you don't live through the things he does without some battle sense. And right now he's pretty sure that any glowing red embers observed from above would be as good as swinging a laser pointer around.

On the other hand, it seems that the mortar shells don't seem to need much help finding their vicinity. "Just swell. MOVE, unless you'd rather someone be studying your cadaver!" Grabbing Gerune by the arm, Nightburn yanks him along and dives for cover when his ear detects that telltale whistle. Diving forward with his charge, he does his best to shield the robed man from the blast as they're knocked flying.

"Chatting it up almost got us killed there. Less talk, more walk."

<Pose Tracker> Kahm Yugh has posed.

<NIGHTBURN>-----------------------<GEBLER> (The group gains slightly, but still no sight on Nightburn)

"Smoking? Remarkable." Gerune said, having heard something of how the surface dwellers used primitive methods to enjoy nicotine. "Should we get the chance, I would be interested to try one."

Just then, however, he's seized most brusquely by the arm as the earth bursts around them, largely drowning out the man's complaints for Nightburn's sake. "Unconscionable! Do those doddering dolts have any idea I am here?! I will submit a formal complaint to that jack-booted commander of theirs!"

Nightburn's instincts are nothing to sneeze at, and telling that they avoid the worst of it, but they are forced to proceed cautiously...which also allows them to be set on by a group of brigands. "Are those ruffians actually shooting at us with bullets?!" Gerune exclaims, as if aghast, "Sir, do something about it!"

DG: Kahm Yugh has used his Tool Sonic Grenade toward his party's challenge, Pre-Graverobbers.
<Pose Tracker> Seraphita has posed.
Poor Seraphita, all that leaping and jumping isn't enough to avoid getting a bit banged up by those shells, all puns intended. Luckily, she's the FIRE Element, and fire is less painful to her than most. That includes explosions! The shrapnel is still pretty nasty, but the day is young, and she's still fast on her feet.
Surely, she'd hear Parbody well indeed, if not for that sudden sonic grenade Kahm hurls towards bandits. Seraphita stops bouncing, whining as she slams her ears against her hair. It doesn't help very much. "Owie owie owie, this sucks! Hey, these ears are real, you know!" This is okay, though. This is what she has COURAGE for. The green gem in her collar lights up - fueled by Ether, not courage, but SHUSH!!! - and the rabbit rises, only slightly pouting now. She hops over towards the bandits, doing a hand-stand.
"LOOK WHAT I CAN DO! I'VE BEEN PRACTICING, ISN'T IT NEAT?!" she shouts, towards Kahm, Loren and Parbody, seeking their approval. Is she not... is she not going to help in any other way?
Well, put it this way. Do you know what happens when your inner magical reserves literally burst into flames? When the magic forcibly leaves your body and immediatly fuels a pyre, burning you from the inside out? The bandits, they're about to find out.
DG: Seraphita has used her Tool G-Stone toward her party's challenge, Pre-Graverobbers.
<Pose Tracker> Nightburn Acklund has posed.

YUP, STILL ELSEWHERE


<Pose Tracker> Nightburn Acklund has posed.

YUP, STILL ELSEWHERE

Prior to explosive related gymnastics, Nightburn offers the scientist a grin. "Tell you what, once we make it to the other side I'll send you off with one of mine as a going away present." One, that prevents Gerune from bringing it up again as they fight for their loves. Two, it gives him something to look forward to. Whether or not this guy is a soldier, some of the psychology remains the same...keep them focused on what they have to live for.

Nightburn knows that one all too well.

The detour that the two are forced to take brings them into the company of *actual* brigands, not the wishy-washy wannabes that they were dealing with earlier. Threats aren't going to do the job this time. Or at least...threats that aren't prefaced by a healthy serving of violence. The Drifter reaches into his coat and draws an ARM again -- though not the same one. Rather than the snub-nosed pistol from earlier, he's now brandishing a compact submachinegun. By all appearances it's a working piece of tech from the Metal Demon Wars. "I don't have time for you chumps. Clear the path."

Far ahead of the special forces unit, the sound of combat takes on a slightly different note - sustained bursts of gunfire accompanied by screams.

DG: Nightburn Acklund has contributed a Combat Basic Action toward his party's challenge, Pre-Graverobbers.
<Pose Tracker> Loren Voss has posed.
The... right tenant. Belatedly, Loren is reminded of the actual qualifications needed for selection as an Element.
Okay. Great. He can handle this. It's been a long day, but he can handle this.
It's also definitely not the first time he's had artillery shells detonate perilously close by. Well, dying in action at least might get a commendation...
He might even have a chance at this rate. A shout escapes the medic as a sudden explosion too close for comfort nearly wipes him off the map... to say nothing of the plume of earth it kicks up, just about blinding him in the process. Unlike Seraphita, he's not quite as light on his feet.
Stay together and get collectively blown up... or separate and get blown up separately. Well, at least the Captain resolves that conundrum quickly. Loren falls in, ducking around the remains of some shattered machinery to pull up alongside Kahm.
Looters, looks like. He glances sidelong at the Captain, noting that almost-smile; a brief survey of Kahm's injuries follows. Seraphita's, too -- she looks like she didn't quite escape the blast either. He makes an attempt to quickly assess Parbody as well since they do need all hands on deck.
And he goes for his medical kit.
These are the real things, none of the more primitive medical supplies available for surface-dwellers... or really, for most of Solaris -- combat medical kits always have a few interesting bits of technology that civilian materials mostly can't touch.
Largely because 1) it's necessary and 2) the administration methods can be unplesasant.
Which, fortunately! Isn't the case with the gel. Hopefully the other items won't be necessary because they're not much fun.
Though in Seraphita's case he might have to throw the applicator as she hops over towards the bandits. "..." Yes, his silence is audible.
Loren is likely to observe first-hand what it really means to be an Element.
DG: Loren Voss has used his Tool Solarian Medical Kit toward his party's challenge, Pre-Graverobbers.
<Pose Tracker> Elhaym van Houten has posed.

Parbody continues to trundle along. She is not nearly as leapy as Seraphita. When a sonic grenade throws forwards, Parbody comes to a halt - and her head turns to look straight at that mysterious stone on Seraphita's collar.

Huh, Parbody thinks, tilting her head to the side.

Parbody looks towards them then and contemplates how best to use her mana reserves, such as they are, in the face of this level of lapine incinerating force. She strokes the 'chin' of her gas mask in thought.

She doesn't try to compete, in favor of axe-kicking a bandit who has, one way or another, caught fire. He doesn't get up again.

Parbody claps her hands as she walks forwards, before she can get blood on her suit. "Have you caught sight of them yet, squire?" she asks Kahm. Loren can see a little blood dripping down the back of the woman's scalp.

DG: Elhaym van Houten has contributed a Combat Basic Action toward her party's challenge, Pre-Graverobbers.
=============================<* The Battle Front *>=============================
=======================<* CHALLENGE - Pre-Graverobbers *>=======================
|Type: Exploration |Dungeon Ability: Combat    |Challenge Rating: 1          | 
---------------------------< Challenge Information: >---------------------------
 Some bandits do not wait for the battle to be over, before they begin the     
 grisly business of looting the dead. As you move to the edge of the fight,    
 you find a group of bandits that are not waiting long at all. Clad in heavy   
 desert garments, toting Gunsmoke ARMs, they see you -- and drop bloodied      
 bags of loot, before lifting their guns and opening fire.                     
=Dungeon Conditions: Bad Luck, Tire===========================================
========================<* The Battle Front - Round 2 *>========================
=========================< Results - Pre-Graverobbers >=========================
Player                               Exhaustion                      Pass/Fail
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Kahm Yugh                           12 --(5)--> 17                 Pass
Sonic Grenade                       2   Combat  Effects: Embolden             
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Loren Voss                          13 --(4)--> 17                 Pass
Solarian Medical Kit                1   Combat  Effects: Cleanse              
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Seraphita                           13 --(6)--> 19                 Pass
G-Stone                             2   Combat  Effects: Embolden             
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Nightburn Acklund                   16 --(5)--> 21                 Fail
Fight                               0   Combat  Effects: BASIC                
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Elhaym van Houten                   9 --(6)--> 15                  Pass
Fight                               0   Combat  Effects: BASIC                
-----------------------------------< Party >------------------------------------
Leader: Kahm Yugh                   10 --(20)--> 30                Pass
Conditions: Bad Luck(2)|Slow(1)|Suffer|Tire(2)
Effects: Cleanse|Embolden(1)
===============================< Dream Chasers >================================
DG: The party led by Kahm Yugh has passed this challenge! The party gained 20 exploration! If anyone needs to use party management
commands, do so now. Otherwise, the next round's GM may begin the next round with +dungeon/draw.
DG: Kahm Yugh has drawn a new Challenge.
=============================<* The Battle Front *>=============================
======================<* CHALLENGE - Barricade Breaking *>======================
|Type: Exploration |Dungeon Ability: Brute     |Challenge Rating: 2          | 
---------------------------< Challenge Information: >---------------------------
 A barricade erected by infantry blocks your path ahead. Built between two     
 outcroppings of rock, it would be hard to go around -- and even though it     
 was placed in quickly, it is quite sturdy. Huge beams of steel and spikes     
 make it hard to move. It could be dangerous, too; the chance of cutting       
 yourself on those spikes is a real threat.                                    
=Dungeon Conditions: Tire, Bad Luck===========================================
<Pose Tracker> Kahm Yugh has posed.

<NIGHTBURN>------------<GEBLER> (Notable gain! The group sights Nightburn, but he is still ahead by a good hundred yards/sharls or so)

Nightburn's spray of SMG fire does take out a few punks who were unlucky enough to make his day, but the rest of the gang has enough presence of mind to cluster together and take cover behind a fallen gear, returning fire from a position secure enough to give even the legendary drifter some trouble dislodging them.

That is, until something they see from their vantage point spooks them enough to actually have them run off. Whatever could that be?

"Remarkable!" Gerune exclaims from behind Nightburn's shoulder, having whipped out some complicated-looking doodad that was whirring and beeping with all sorts of strange runic symbols (Solarian, if Nightburn knew enough to recognize it). "This is...yes, i'm detecting an incredible spike of local etheric activity to the south! Only the truly talented can produce metrics like these! Heh, hopefully they're on our side!"

And while Nightburn can ruminate on just who 'our side' might be, that erected barrier looms formidably past the fallen gear with an unknown factor gaining on them from behind...

DG: Kahm Yugh has contributed a Brute Basic Action toward his party's challenge, Barricade Breaking.
<Pose Tracker> Seraphita has posed.
"Thank you, thank you~" Seraphita says, oblivious to the destruction around her. This really was about the hand-stand, for her, not the setting people on fire. The latter is casual at this point. The former is true acrobatic talent. She flips a few times but lands on her hands again, following after the group in that awkward upside-down pose.
She only gets upright again to grab the medicine Loren brought to bear and apply it to her scrapes from earlier, thanks to that artillery incident. She seems to know how to use fancy Solarian healing items so that's probably a good thing?
But their way forward is barred!!! By rude metal things.
Seraphita hops upright again, watching Kahm invoke destruction. "Ooh, my turn, my turn! Did you know that hot metal gets all red and orange? It's really cool to look at! When it starts to melt and puddle up, I just want to grab a stick and play with it, but Tolone says I'd just burn myself."
Oh, yes, contributions. Seraphita flashes red, and suddenly unleashes a blast of Ether of her own, fueled by the very magic she drained from the bandits moments earlier. It's less a blast and more a sudden, incredible spike in temperature around the barrier, such that the air starts swirling like a fiery vortex.
It's Parbody she turns to next, curious. "Ooh, what's our target look like? Will he want to play with us when we find him?" Just be happy she memorized SOME of the briefing, it's already a lot for her.
DG: Seraphita has contributed a Brute Basic Action toward her party's challenge, Barricade Breaking.
<Pose Tracker> Loren Voss has posed.
"You're bleeding," Loren informs Parbody, shoving the medical gel applicator her way. Translation: you should take care of that.
The amount of ether expenditure is intense. His own focus for the etheric arts might be elsewhere, but that doesn't mean he doesn't feel or miss -- if vision and the fleeting scent in the air didn't tell the story -- just what went down over there. Behind his faceplate, Loren blinks, his expression gone briefly completely blank.
Not bad. Not bad at all.
Cautiously, he rises from his crouch as Kahm moves to press on, forced to pick up the pace slightly to keep up.
"Target sighted?"
Apparently yes. This earns a slight nod from the medic's corner of the world.
Just one problem: the barrier between them and Gerune's last sighted position.
Loren's fingers twitch. Right hand, if it matters; he sinks his awareness into the earth and rock beneath their feet. People often make the mistake of assuming that earth is a stable element.
It really, really, isn't. It's a tightly wound thing, and the little readjustments in pressure and stress can cause some very interesting things to happen. Like, well. The pillar of rock sliding up out of the ground to smash into the barricade blocking their way, joining similar invocations of elemental force from his Solarian allies here. Sometimes the brute force method is best.
DG: Loren Voss has contributed a Brute Basic Action toward his party's challenge, Barricade Breaking.
<Pose Tracker> Nightburn Acklund has posed.


Nightburn has a shiny, intimidating gun. While the suppressing power of his hard-light SMG projectiles is formidable, this isn't a holdout - they have to keep moving. They would have had to seek another detour if something hadn't gone and scared them off...but even having gained that time, they're still running behind by the veteran Drifter's reckoning. "No kidding...and that's exactly why it's a bet I'm willing " Gerune might note that his guiding lamb seems a little...agitated at the frequent setbacks they're facing? Then again, most gunmen *would* be under pressure trading fire as he is. There probably isn't another reason that he's trying to speed them along.

Probably.

Speaking of setbacks, another lies in front of them. "We're going to have to muscle our way through this one. And our best bet is..." His eyes quickly dart around the field. He doubts the scientist will be of much help, but...ahah! Picking up a sheet of tripped gear armor, he hefts it between them. "I need you to stay in single file behind me. When I count to three, we're going to charge the wall and try to break our way through. I'm in front, so if anyone's going to get hurt it'll be me. Don't worry about me, just throw your weight into my back and we'll be fine." ...Maybe. "If you're feeling tired, chew on this before we start." Producing a knife and a...very unique specimen of fruit, the Drifter quickly pares off a few slices and divides them up between the two. He eats his first, of course. Can't have the scientist thinking this is a trap.

DG: Nightburn Acklund has used his Tool Power Apple toward his party's challenge, Barricade Breaking.
<Pose Tracker> Elhaym van Houten has posed.

Parbody doesn't inquire about the Solarian robes - she doesn't need to. She gives Kahm a frilly little salute and resumes hustling. They're faced with a barricade in between two pieces of stone immediately thereafter, and Parbody pauses, arms folding.

Seraphita speaks to her. Parbody turns her mask towards the Element. "It's true," she says. "You know how flame can get even hotter than that, can't you? I'm sure you've had your posh training but you might find this a little fun to see."

Parbody then sweeps a hand through her hair - at Loren informing her of things and giving her a gel applicator. "Well," she says, taking the material and squirting it into one gloved hand, running it through her hair and turning a slightly overgrown gamine hairstyle into a slicked-back mafioso 'do in swift order. "If you say so."

After this Parbody raises her arms above her head, cocks her hip, and twists her wrists around. Her fingers wiggle. Presumably beneath her suit there is some kind of tattoo action going on; Symbology's mouth-feel can be recognized by all these Ether users around her; but what may have some innovation is a shrieking intersection of two gouts of flame, where they flash blue just as they intersect one of the anchor points of the metal plate.

"Ta," she says.

"Ask the squire," Parbody tells Seraphita, "but he said something about solar robes."

DG: Elhaym van Houten has used her Tool Spy Purse toward her party's challenge, Barricade Breaking.
=============================<* The Battle Front *>=============================
======================<* CHALLENGE - Barricade Breaking *>======================
|Type: Exploration |Dungeon Ability: Brute     |Challenge Rating: 2          | 
---------------------------< Challenge Information: >---------------------------
 A barricade erected by infantry blocks your path ahead. Built between two     
 outcroppings of rock, it would be hard to go around -- and even though it     
 was placed in quickly, it is quite sturdy. Huge beams of steel and spikes     
 make it hard to move. It could be dangerous, too; the chance of cutting       
 yourself on those spikes is a real threat.                                    
=Dungeon Conditions: Tire, Bad Luck===========================================
========================<* The Battle Front - Round 3 *>========================
========================< Results - Barricade Breaking >========================
Player                               Exhaustion                      Pass/Fail
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Kahm Yugh                           17 --(8)--> 25                 Fail
Force                               0   Brute   Effects: BASIC                
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Loren Voss                          17 --(7)--> 24                 Pass
Force                               0   Brute   Effects: BASIC                
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Seraphita                           19 --(6)--> 25                 Pass
Force                               0   Brute   Effects: BASIC                
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Nightburn Acklund                   21 --(9)--> 30                 Pass
Power Apple                         2   Brute   Effects: Strengthen           
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Elhaym van Houten                   15 --(8)--> 23                 Pass
Spy Purse                           1   Brute   Effects: Cleanse              
-----------------------------------< Party >------------------------------------
Leader: Kahm Yugh                   30 --(20)--> 50                Pass
Conditions: Bad Luck(2)|Tire(2)
Effects: Cleanse|Strengthen(1)
===============================< Dream Chasers >================================
DG: The party led by Kahm Yugh has passed this challenge! The party gained 20 exploration! If anyone needs to use party management
commands, do so now. Otherwise, the next round's GM may begin the next round with +dungeon/draw.
DG: Kahm Yugh has drawn a new Challenge.
=============================<* The Battle Front *>=============================
======================<* CHALLENGE - Battalion Crossing *>======================
|Type: Exploration |Dungeon Ability: Wits      |Challenge Rating: 2          | 
---------------------------< Challenge Information: >---------------------------
 Some of the forces arrayed on this battlefield are far beyond what an         
 individual Drifter can handle -- or even a dedicated team of them. As you     
 approach, you hear some shouting ahead of you, and the steady clomp of boots  
 on the ground. You may want to find a way to be very inconspicuous --         
 because rounding the bend of the large hill ahead is a cluster of some        
 hundred soldiers, armed to the teeth and looking for a fight.                 
=Dungeon Conditions: Bad Luck, Wound==========================================
<Pose Tracker> Kahm Yugh has posed.

<NIGHTBURN>---------<GEBLER> (The group is in spitting distance of Nightburn, but the wind up on opposite sides of the marching battalion)

Gerune at least seems willing to comply with Nighburn's directions, particularly after he's had a piece of that queer fruit. "Why, I feel as if I could lift a hovercraft! I believe I taste of hint of...mm, yes, this must be one of the natural substances we synthesize the enhancers from..." He says, largely mumbling to himself as the drifter manage to ram their way through the barricade. It's a successful ploy, but only long enough to allow them through before the surrounding material collapses and seals the passage behind them-to their apparent benefit.

Unfortunately, they emerged from one Promethean frying pan into its resultant flame as a squad of Kislevi soldiers begins to beat a path over the upcoming ridge, no doubt looking for enemies to engage. Nightburn had best think fast.

"I believe those are the ones we're fighting against." Gerune offers so helpfully, once again quite unclear on who 'we' is.

DG: Kahm Yugh has contributed a Wits Basic Action toward his party's challenge, Battalion Crossing.
<Pose Tracker> Loren Voss has posed.
Well, Loren supposes, that's one way to handle a head wound.
In any case, the barrier in front of them goes handily with a little application of etheric -- and non-etheric, he's been in close enough quarters with Symbologists to recognize the feel of their art -- might, which...
Reveals a separate problem ahead. Ducking behind what remains of a shattered ballista of some sort, he slides up his faceplate and -- just touching his glasses -- squints at the army column on the march.
Hmm.
And he glances over at Seraphita.
"I don't suppose you can create a distraction? An explosion, on their far side."
DG: Loren Voss has used his Tool Etheric Lenses toward his party's challenge, Battalion Crossing.
<Pose Tracker> Nightburn Acklund has posed.

This new situation manages to elicit a grimace from the veteran Drifter. Faced with so many soldiers, and no clear route to circumvent them...what are they to do?!

Confront them head on, of course. "Stay here. I'll be right back. I promise." Offering a sly wink of reassurance, he leaves Gerune behind a tree.

Ahead of every large body of soldiers on the march are scouts who relay information back to the main unit. If you want to divert an army, those are your target. Once Nightburn is able to locate one, he boldly approaches head on...weapon in hand, but not drawn. "Keep the weapon down...I don't want any trouble. This could work out for the both of us. Me and my old man are being chased by Gebler forces...we bombed one of their convoys and they're none too happy about it. You should be able to find them to the southwest. Don't take my word for it though...they should be just on the other side of the barricade."

That should be enough to have the soldier's interest. Now to seal the deal.

"Consider that one a freebie. And if you tell your main unit that you didn't see anyone when you were passing through these parts..." He removes a small case from his coat and flips it open. Crisp, fragant, expensive cigars. "...I'll throw in these as a bonus."

DG: Nightburn Acklund has used his Tool Cigar Box toward his party's challenge, Battalion Crossing.
<Pose Tracker> Seraphita has posed.
Parbody is right, Seraphita does find it quite fun to watch a different kind of fire being used! She's only familiar with her own, and Ether in general. Symbology, not so much! She ooohs, she aaahs, she claps excitedly when the display is finished, and bounces happily along between safe spots, avoiding the slag she would so dearly desire play with but somehow knows better than playing with.
"Kidnap and random? That doesn't sound very smart! Tolone always says you can't just act randomly and call that a good plan!" Close... enough? But the sight of all those Kislevi soldiers, and Kahm diving for cover, makes the rabbit tap her chin.
"Why're you hiding?"
Then Loren suggests a distraction.
"Grandmother always said, if you want something, you just have to ask really nicely! I've got this, don't worry, left tenant! Your right tenant is on the job!!" Seraphita bunny hops her way towards the soldiers.
She's waving.
"Heeeeey guys! Can we come through? We're looking for someone!"
DG: Seraphita has contributed a Wits Basic Action toward her party's challenge, Battalion Crossing.
<Pose Tracker> Loren Voss has posed.
Loren's current status: internally screaming.
<Pose Tracker> Elhaym van Houten has posed.

Explosions are fun! The presence of a large group of soldiers is making Parbody think: Maybe I should have stayed on the wagon. Probably so, anyway. She muses to herself about this challenge -

Then Seraphita bunnyhops ahead.

"Good thinking," she tells Loren distantly, before walking in a sort of double-time herky jerky pace to get round the group of soldiers as they, perhaps, shoot Seraphita, or are instead killed by her. She turns her head to watch either way: after all, it's a pretty big show.

DG: Elhaym van Houten has contributed a Wits Basic Action toward her party's challenge, Battalion Crossing.
=============================<* The Battle Front *>=============================
======================<* CHALLENGE - Battalion Crossing *>======================
|Type: Exploration |Dungeon Ability: Wits      |Challenge Rating: 2          | 
---------------------------< Challenge Information: >---------------------------
 Some of the forces arrayed on this battlefield are far beyond what an         
 individual Drifter can handle -- or even a dedicated team of them. As you     
 approach, you hear some shouting ahead of you, and the steady clomp of boots  
 on the ground. You may want to find a way to be very inconspicuous --         
 because rounding the bend of the large hill ahead is a cluster of some        
 hundred soldiers, armed to the teeth and looking for a fight.                 
=Dungeon Conditions: Bad Luck, Wound==========================================
========================<* The Battle Front - Round 4 *>========================
========================< Results - Battalion Crossing >========================
Player                               Exhaustion                      Pass/Fail
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Kahm Yugh                           25 --(14)--> 39                Fail
Investigate                         0   Wits    Effects: BASIC                
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Loren Voss                          24 --(16)--> 40                Pass
Etheric Lenses                      2   Wits    Effects: Enlighten            
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Seraphita                           25 --(14)--> 39                Fail
Investigate                         0   Wits    Effects: BASIC                
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Nightburn Acklund                   30 --(13)--> 43                Fail
Cigar Box                           1   Wits    Effects: Cleanse              
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Elhaym van Houten                   23 --(15)--> 38                Fail
Investigate                         0   Wits    Effects: BASIC                
-----------------------------------< Party >------------------------------------
Leader: Kahm Yugh                   50 --(10)--> 60                Fail
Conditions: Bad Luck(2)|Wound(2)
Effects: Cleanse|Enlighten(1)
===============================< Dream Chasers >================================
DG: The party led by Kahm Yugh has failed this challenge! The party gained 10 exploration! If anyone needs to use party management
commands, do so now. Otherwise, the next round's GM may begin the next round with +dungeon/draw.
DG: Kahm Yugh has drawn a new Challenge.
=============================<* The Battle Front *>=============================
====================<* CHALLENGE - Controlled Demolitions *>====================
|Type: Exploration |Dungeon Ability: Agility   |Challenge Rating: 2          | 
---------------------------< Challenge Information: >---------------------------
 As you run across the battlefield, you enter a section of hastily made        
 trenches that had been abandoned. You feel the ground start to give -- and    
 shift -- beneath your feet. You soon discover why. Explosives have been       
 laced throughout the ground here. When you advance, they begin to explode --  
 and sections of the battlefield erupt into titanic explosions all around      
 you!                                                                          
=Dungeon Conditions: Injure, Bad Luck=========================================
<Pose Tracker> Kahm Yugh has posed.

<NIGHTBURN>---<GEBLER> (The group catches up to Nightburn on this round! However, you get to deal with explosions)

The idea of trying communicate with more than one lamb is clearly unwelcome to the good doctor, who merely waves Nightburn on his way, "Oh, very well. Just be quick about it."

Unfortunately, Nightburn didn't seem to find one of the more opportunistic soldiers to talk down. The man seems look him over and snorts derisively, "What, blew up a convoy? Join the club. They're pissed at all of us right now, but we've got bigger fish to fry right now. Take care of your own problems."

However, he'll still take the cigars when offered, offering a non-committal shrug. "Get lost." He said.

Well, at least he wasn't likely to mention them to anyone.

DG: Kahm Yugh has used his Tool Field Rations toward his party's challenge, Controlled Demolitions.
DC: Nightburn Acklund switches forms to The Legendary Drifter!
<Pose Tracker> Seraphita has posed.
"Thank you, mister!!" Seraphita responds to the soldier, not paying one iota of attention to the fact these are enemies. All Seraphita sees is people! She is... a very bad Solarian, let's be completely upfront about this fact. But apparently a very good negotiator!
As the party regroups to cross, the rabbit grins, evidently proud of herself. "See? If you're nice to people, they'll be nice right back at you!" She even raises a finger to make a point! Oh hey they even found their target! It's time to be even NICER!!
"Mister wait up! We just want to get that person you're escorting, can you please let us have him?" Seraphita engages in HOT PURSUIT oh god mines. An explosion sends the poor bunny rocketing forward, this time not entirely of her own volition, though her landing is pretty great regardless. "Wow, they prepared a field of shortcuts just for us! C'mon guys, let's race!!" With a snap of fiery red Ether, Seraphita launches herself forward, using one of the landmines to gain further momentum! It's not the safest plan but it's a weird reminder she knows what she's doing, SOMEHOW.
DG: Seraphita has contributed a Agility Basic Action toward her party's challenge, Controlled Demolitions.
<Pose Tracker> Loren Voss has posed.
Loren slides his faceplate back into place, bracing himself for what is certain to come as Seraphita runs up to make a friend, so to speak.
And it... Huh. The medic ever-so-slightly cocks his head to one side. Somehow, this chain of events doesn't get them all shot immediately.
But even though they cross this section unscathed, he's silent as he follows along. Something seems off. Something about this was too easy, suspiciously so.
"Captain," he starts to voice, accepting the ration as it's passed along. "Something doesn't seem right. It could be a tr--"
Target spotted. Anyone watching will get to see exactly how fast Loren can consume a field ration (answer: distressingly fast) before once again sliding the faceplate back and reaching for his sidearm. No shots are forthcoming, not with the man they need to rescue that close by, but a service firearm even if it's not aimed can be fairly convincing.
Or, it would be if the vibrations underfoot, followed by explosions, didn't present them with a different problem.
Let's... what?
If the prospect of dying by minefield with his last meal a trail ration weren't so grim and immediate a prospect, even Loren might have snapped back at Seraphita for this one. As it is though -- he has somewhere to be and it's definitely not here. Extending what focus he can into the earth and attempting to sink deeper -- on the fly -- some of the mines close at hand, he runs for it.
Focus is bound to be a scarce commodity though -- this probably won't work well.
DG: Loren Voss has contributed a Agility Basic Action toward his party's challenge, Controlled Demolitions.
<Pose Tracker> Nightburn Acklund has posed.


Sadly, just because you know how to talk smooth doesn't mean that the other party likes it that way. Still, the fact that the soldier isn't *immediately* calling the thunder down on them is something. He'll take it.

According to the intel he had prior to arrival, there should be a mine field up ahead. Not what he would normally consider an escape route, but given current circumstances...and the fact that the Kislev soldiers are allowing them to pass in this direction...it might be one of the few cards he has left to play at this point. "C'mon, this way. We don't want to give them an opportunity to rethink this."

At this point, Gerune might notice something slightly odd...Nightburn is falling back slightly and letting the scientist lead. "Just an added precaution.", he advises. "Also, stop. Turn slightly to the right...there you go." Has the scientist noticed the explosives yet? Hopefully not.

It's right about then that a soldier yells for them to stop. Cursing his accurate prediction, Nightburn turns his bearded head back to look... "Oh no, they've caught up to us! Book it, man! Book it!!"

Nightburn helpfully 'returns fire' with his SMG, very specifically targeting the ground that their pursuit is traversing. This is the veteran's gambit; that he can make this minefield work more to his own advantage:

1) He has fewer people to navigate through here.

2) They need the scientist to live. The reverse is not also true.

If he's particularly lucky, the scientist will assume that the explosives are the 'enemy' firing on them and not something else! Just...pay no mind to the fact that Nightburn grabs his ward by the wrist and appears to be weaving a very *specific* path through the fields ahead.

DG: Nightburn Acklund has contributed a Agility Basic Action toward his party's challenge, Controlled Demolitions.
<Pose Tracker> Elhaym van Houten has posed.

Parbody's wearing steel toed boots in the desert along with men's wear so concealing that the blood that Loren saw was the closest thing to a suggestion of a skin tone of anything. Or that there's skin there at all. She accepts the ration pack and slips it into her jacket for obvious reasons, nodding her black-masked face.

Then they're given directions. "I hae me dowts," Parbody says, and that's just not anybody's accent anywhere, Parb, what the hell?

Parb's 'dowts' are adequately expressed by the factor of explosions. Several of them burst and throw detonations around the well dressed woman, who turns her head from left to right. Close examiners would see a lack of fear in her, but perhaps this is also from a lack of SENSE, or simply DERANGED CRIMINAL INSANITY.

She sees Seraphita's technique. Burning images of the rabbit-beastwoman's forceful use of the explosion to not merely further but multiply the force of her already impressive untutored and unenhanced vertical leap...

"That's astonishing," Parbody says.

Then she herself leaps forwards onto a mine while going limp. There is a tremendous BANG and a shock runs up her leg with astounding, agonizing force, but not cripplingly so - her padded, armored greaves prevent anything from flying out, though the injury to her cuff will no doubt be a matter of great concern to her. Thrown upwards, Parbody topples forwards, being in a sense unused to leaping.

More mines erupt behind them. Parbody has enough air that she will not be landing this round.

DG: Elhaym van Houten has used her Tool Sassy Boots toward her party's challenge, Controlled Demolitions.
=============================<* The Battle Front *>=============================
====================<* CHALLENGE - Controlled Demolitions *>====================
|Type: Exploration |Dungeon Ability: Agility   |Challenge Rating: 2          | 
---------------------------< Challenge Information: >---------------------------
 As you run across the battlefield, you enter a section of hastily made        
 trenches that had been abandoned. You feel the ground start to give -- and    
 shift -- beneath your feet. You soon discover why. Explosives have been       
 laced throughout the ground here. When you advance, they begin to explode --  
 and sections of the battlefield erupt into titanic explosions all around      
 you!                                                                          
=Dungeon Conditions: Injure, Bad Luck=========================================
========================<* The Battle Front - Round 5 *>========================
======================< Results - Controlled Demolitions >======================
Player                               Exhaustion                      Pass/Fail
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Kahm Yugh                           39 --(9)--> 48                 Pass
Field Rations                       1   Agility Effects: Cleanse              
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Loren Voss                          40 --(15)--> 55                Fail
Rush                                0   Agility Effects: BASIC                
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Seraphita                           39 --(18)--> 57                Fail
Rush                                0   Agility Effects: BASIC                
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Nightburn Acklund                   43 --(15)--> 58                Fail
Rush                                0   Agility Effects: BASIC                
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Elhaym van Houten                   38 --(10)--> 48                Pass
Sassy Boots                         2   Agility Effects: Stalwart             
-----------------------------------< Party >------------------------------------
Leader: Kahm Yugh                   60 --(10)--> 70                Fail
Conditions: Bad Luck(2)|Injure(2)
Effects: Cleanse|Stalwart(1)
===============================< Dream Chasers >================================
DG: The party led by Kahm Yugh has failed this challenge! The party gained 10 exploration! If anyone needs to use party management
commands, do so now. Otherwise, the next round's GM may begin the next round with +dungeon/draw.
DG: Kahm Yugh has drawn a new Challenge.
=============================<* The Battle Front *>=============================
========================<* CHALLENGE - Obscured Path *>=========================
|Type: Exploration |Dungeon Ability: Wits      |Challenge Rating: 2          | 
---------------------------< Challenge Information: >---------------------------
 Your path is taking you the long way around a huge, sheer cliff face.         
 However, you might notice that a winding switchback cuts through it. You      
 might be able to take a shortcut -- or, perhaps, that will lead only to a     
 dead-end and a bottleneck in this dangerous firefight. A decision, whether    
 to take it or not, must be made quickly.                                      
=Dungeon Conditions: Save Point===============================================
<Pose Tracker> Kahm Yugh has posed.

Doctor Gerune is not a young man, and his ideas about how life actually is on the surface obviously leave much to be desired. To whit, he is well taken in by Nightburn's ploy as explosions rock the area around them, running forward with a growing sense of self-preservation. "Get a leg up man! My brilliant mind can't afford to captured by the likes of these savages!"

No offense obviously. He's too hurried and addled by the chaos around him to even look backwards while Nightburn sprayed the ground. It had the desired effect of throwing more fire and fury back at their pursuers, but also set off some additional mines placed aside them that were none too pretty to handle. Miraculously, the doctor seems to have escape with no more than more dirt on his robes as he scrambled up the trail, though here his age shows as he slows down and tires. "Oof...not sure how long I keep this up..."


Kahm effectively sailed through the explosions with his own method of minesweeping, having just been about to close on Nightburn when the man set off his explosions. With an annoy titch, he leapt away in time to avoid the rest of it, holding his ground and attempting to rally the group together. "We're gaining on them." He comments, pointing to the cliffside ahead. "It's their only option, and Gerune's age is likely to make him a burden to the other man."

Which...could actually be very bad, depending on the kind of man Nightburn is. "We should split." Kahm offered suddenly, "One group to follow them, the other up the other path to try and head him off. Give him less avenues of escape."

DG: Kahm Yugh has contributed a Wits Basic Action toward his party's challenge, Obscured Path.
<Pose Tracker> Loren Voss has posed.
The attempt to stifle the mines does, in fact, not help. In fact, with focus being a little thin on the ground as Loren attempts to book it, it probably anti-helped. A little bit of vibration and not enough depth means they're going to get set off. This is not his shining hour.
Particularly not when a blast outright knocks him off his feet and sends him sprawling; serious injury is averted by the combat gear but he's walking away from this with at least some interesting bruises. The only good news is, he didn't accidentally get shot.
Sliding up the faceplate as he pulls up with Kahm, Loren briefly touches a hand to his glasses. "...Yes, there's nowhere else they can go. If we can cut off their advance..."
And he glances between his options here as Kahm suggests they split up.
"You," he says to Parbody. "We'll follow them."
DG: Loren Voss has used his Tool Etheric Lenses toward his party's challenge, Obscured Path.
<Pose Tracker> Seraphita has posed.
Seraphita's stunt did not go as planned, maybe because she bounced on one mine too many, maybe because Nightburn was setting them off, or because she underestimated the punch of the Kislevi explosives. Probably, all three of the above. Either way, her rocketing ahead is cut short by a crash to the ground, and for a few moments the rabbit has her head in the sand and legs sticking up.
If she was wearing a skirt it'd be pretty gratuitous fanservice.
But she's not, so it's basically the same gratuitous fanservice as before anyway. Someone's going to have to ask her about that dress code eventually.
Pulling herself back up, Seraphita shakes her head, knocking the sand out of her hair and ears. She seems quite happy still, despite the setback. Or maybe she's unable to express anything but that? You never know, with Solarians. And she does look like prime experimentation material.
"Alright, left tenant! I'll go around with mister captain and we'll crab him!!!" You know what, that's still basically close enough.
DG: Seraphita has contributed a Wits Basic Action toward her party's challenge, Obscured Path.
<Pose Tracker> Elhaym van Houten has posed.

Parbody comes down to a landing - which she actually kind of aborted from an arc that...

"Oooo, squire, that would've been perfect, wouldn't it? Well there's no use crying over wet laundry, is there?" Parbody says as she tilts her head up, looking away. Then she's sent on the doctor squad.

She flicks her hair back with one hand. It's still well gelled. "I'm charmed," she says to Loren. "Let's run, shall we?"

SOON!

While she's alone with Loren, Parbody says almost nothing. Due to the effort of moving quickly, Parbody is breathing a bit heavily, and this is producing a scent not entirely unlike camphor.

"So," she asks him. "Working up close or at a distance? I can manage either swing, but we have two shirts to wash here, not just one."

DG: Elhaym van Houten has contributed a Wits Basic Action toward her party's challenge, Obscured Path.
<Pose Tracker> Nightburn Acklund has posed.


The hurried advance of the wayward scientist and his Drifter escort comes to a sudden halt. In no small part due to the fact that Gerune has not a half of the physical conditioning. "This may be the end of the line soon...I think we're going to have to gamble on taking a shortcut. All or nothing. Win or lose. If we choose wrong, we'll have no choice but to fight our way through. ...So unless you've got some insight that I don't, I think we're risking the shortcut."

This isn't good. Nightburn was hoping to spend more time with the scientist before the pursuit caught up. There might have been able to flip him given the right opportunity. As it stands, unless he can gain some time here he's going to have no choice but to negotiate with the pursuers.

One way or another.

<Pose Tracker> Nightburn Acklund has posed.

Nightburn removes two cigars from another case in his pocket, lighting them both and offering the other to his new friend. "Just in case I can't keep my promise."

DG: Nightburn Acklund has used his Tool Cigar Box toward his party's challenge, Obscured Path.
=============================<* The Battle Front *>=============================
========================<* CHALLENGE - Obscured Path *>=========================
|Type: Exploration |Dungeon Ability: Wits      |Challenge Rating: 2          | 
---------------------------< Challenge Information: >---------------------------
 Your path is taking you the long way around a huge, sheer cliff face.         
 However, you might notice that a winding switchback cuts through it. You      
 might be able to take a shortcut -- or, perhaps, that will lead only to a     
 dead-end and a bottleneck in this dangerous firefight. A decision, whether    
 to take it or not, must be made quickly.                                      
=Dungeon Conditions: Save Point===============================================
========================<* The Battle Front - Round 6 *>========================
==========================< Results - Obscured Path >===========================
Player                               Exhaustion                      Pass/Fail
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Kahm Yugh                           48 --(10)--> 58                Fail
Investigate                         0   Wits    Effects: BASIC                
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Loren Voss                          55 --(10)--> 65                Pass
Etheric Lenses                      2   Wits    Effects: Enlighten            
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Seraphita                           57 --(12)--> 69                Fail
Investigate                         0   Wits    Effects: BASIC                
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Nightburn Acklund                   58 --(15)--> 73                Fail
Cigar Box                           1   Wits    Effects: Cleanse              
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Elhaym van Houten                   48 --(7)--> 55                 Fail
Investigate                         0   Wits    Effects: BASIC                
-----------------------------------< Party >------------------------------------
Leader: Kahm Yugh                   70 --(10)--> 80                Fail
Conditions: Save Point(1)
Effects: Cleanse|Enlighten(1)
===============================< Dream Chasers >================================
DG: The party led by Kahm Yugh has failed this challenge! The party gained 10 exploration! If anyone needs to use party management
commands, do so now. Otherwise, the next round's GM may begin the next round with +dungeon/draw.
DG: Kahm Yugh has drawn a new Challenge.
=============================<* The Battle Front *>=============================
====================<* CHALLENGE - The Shattered Landship *>====================
|Type: Final       |Dungeon Ability: Brute     |Challenge Rating: 2          | 
---------------------------< Challenge Information: >---------------------------
 The Golem Sado has dominated the battlefield in the distance. A fully armed   
 and operation Golem is a terror to behold, and the violet, snake-like         
 machine towers over the battlefield. Gears lay scattered and shattered        
 around it, and periodically, a beam of energy lances across the ground and    
 burns something from existence. That happens now, as a land battleship from   
 Aveh hurls through the air.                                                   
                                                                               
 It has been blasted through and burnt -- and it smashes into the very ground  
 before you. It shatters apart into so much debris, and makes a huge mountain  
 of fiery wreckage. You cannot possibly clear it.                              
                                                                               
 But you must climb, hack, and cut your way through -- because on the other    
 side is a final escape from the battlefield.                                  
=Dungeon Conditions: Wound====================================================
<Pose Tracker> Kahm Yugh has posed.

"I suppose you're right." Gerune said with a sigh, heaving with exertion as they somehow managed to clear the top of the trail, "I always wanted to make this trip when I was a younger, you know. Somehow, I never found the time."

Even so, he has learned so much in this short span of time the that spark of brilliant curiosity within him demands more. He'll gladly take Nighburn's offered cigar, enjoying a long, slow drag on it that burns in his mouth until he exhaled a puff of sweet-smelling smoke, followed by a brief fit of coughing. "So....rude!" He gasped. "And wild, if I had to describe. Even a sophisticated man could get used to such raw pleasures."

He not a terribly aware man, but even he could tell they were being encroached on both sides. "My name is Royce Gerune, by the way." He offered Nightburn a withered old smile, "What is yours?"

DG: Kahm Yugh has contributed a Brute Basic Action toward his party's challenge, The Shattered Landship.
<Pose Tracker> Seraphita has posed.
"A trap? But that's not nice!" Seraphita exclaims, as if this were in fact new information worth divulging. She is clearly appaled by the idea, but it's hard to say if she's capable of being careful so much as going very, very slightly slower. Maybe it's a good thing there wasn't a trap after all.
There's their mark! Seraphita wants to play, so she gets ready to advance - but no, says the Golem, have a landship instead. With a thunderous crash, their way is barred. Seraphita's smile turns ever slightly downward. It is now 75% of a smile.
"Got iiiiit!" she answers Kahm's order.
The rabbit shuffles into an unseen pocket, and pulls out a long slip of pink and red cloth which she unfolds. Wait, is that... it is! The skirt she isn't wearing! There it was all along, in her pockets!
She slips it on.
She cracks her knuckles.
She flashes red.
Her hands point forward, straight at the hull of the flaming landship. She starts pulling them apart, like she's trying to part the seas. The section of landship before her heats up incredibly fast, and parts, just like a sea, the metal groaning as it melts and forms a clear path straight through a large portion of the ship.
"There, we can go through now!"
Hopefully there wasn't anyone in the way.
DG: Seraphita has used her Tool Lucky Skirt toward her party's challenge, The Shattered Landship.
<Pose Tracker> Loren Voss has posed.
Looping around the other side with Parbody -- that's an unusual scent, is it perfume? -- Loren gestures outwards with his free hand, reholstering his firearm for now. "Distance seems best. We don't want to tip our hand." They need to give Kahm and Seraphita time to get into position, he thinks. He glances back, looking Parbody over in consideration. "...As reminder, we need to extract the Doctor alive if possible. Watch your fire."
Gerune dying would be a problem, to put it mildly, even if the higher-ups agree it was unavoidable.
They should leg it though because--
To Loren's credit, he has a good reaction time and draws up short in front of Parbody, deploying the tactical shield as earth, rock, metal and Emperor-knows-what-else goes flying in all directions as the ship is flung earthwards. It's not as bad as, say, tanking the incoming fury of a powerful Metal Demon, but he still is shifted backwards a few centimeters.
Thoughts briefly flung towards a stone tablet resting with his gear back at their rendezvous point.
The shield folds back into its resting state.
The Captain cuts his own path.
...Seraphita demonstrates the power of the right wardrobe for the job.
"You heard the Captain. We'll get rid of this thing."
The earth shifts as Loren focuses, his reach dredging up a speeding wedge of rock to smash into the side of the (likely weakened) landship.
DG: Loren Voss has contributed a Brute Basic Action toward his party's challenge, The Shattered Landship.
<Pose Tracker> Elhaym van Houten has posed.

Parbody lingers for a moment, perhaps overexerted. She IS probably sweating underneath that suit. Right? Well, it's a dry heat.

Loren produces a shield as they crest a hill AND THEN HERE COMES THE LANDSHIP. Parbody looks at it, the fire and the gleam of the wrecked machine gleaming in the dark lenses of her mask. She reaches into her coat, draws out a brown glass bottle, uncorks it -- and unlike some people (Samuelh) does NOT immediately drink it.

No, she hurls it forwards, ahead of Loren's impending strike. It seems to be high molar acid. Of some kind.

"See, I know how the rabbit girl feels," Parbody observes to Loren as she puts a hand on her hip and, discreetly, catches her breath.

DG: Elhaym van Houten has used her Tool Spy Purse toward her party's challenge, The Shattered Landship.
<Pose Tracker> Nightburn Acklund has posed.

One does not mix smoking with physical exertion. The fact that the gentleman Drifter has broken open the smokes at this venture with a clearly exhausted man of the sciences as his tacit admission of resignation. Right on cue, the commander of the pursuing forces makes his entrance. Nightburn's ARM remains unholstered, but not brandished...idly resting at his right hip as his left nurses the cigar he shares with Doctore Gerune. He feigns surprise as he glances between the two, but as it so happens this is an act of deception that he has a lot of practice with. "You two know each other?" His posture is a relaxed one, but the presence of the gun is a clear statement; if pressured, he will defend himself.

Before he can introduce himself, the Golem decides to remind everyone that it's still here. Downing an entire goddamn landship in a single laser blast, Nightburn takes a step forward and places himself between the downed vessel and the scientist. The wreckage is uncomfortably close, but not enough to cause injury to those gathered.

Sticking the cigar in the corner of his mouth for safe keeping, the Drifter turns back to the other two. "Nightburn Acklund, at your service."

(Point of interest: some denizens of Solaris make it their business to tap Veruni television stations. The name and visage of Nightburn is...that of a person of interest. Human. Filgain. The King of Golem Hunters. Veteran drifter of some repute, one of the very few who the Veruni suffer any kind of respect toward.)

"I'm afraid the stories are a *little* overblown, and our friend who downed the battleship is a little much for me to take on by myself...but I can keep an eye on the perimeter while your troops do their thing."

His eyes light on Seraphita as she does...her thing. His lips purse in a whistle of appreciation. "Now that's pretty cool.", he offers in a surprisingly level tone. "...She isn't enlisted, is she? I'd let her be my sidekick."

DG: Nightburn Acklund has used his Tool Power Apple toward his party's challenge, The Shattered Landship.
=============================<* The Battle Front *>=============================
====================<* CHALLENGE - The Shattered Landship *>====================
|Type: Final       |Dungeon Ability: Brute     |Challenge Rating: 2          | 
---------------------------< Challenge Information: >---------------------------
 The Golem Sado has dominated the battlefield in the distance. A fully armed   
 and operation Golem is a terror to behold, and the violet, snake-like         
 machine towers over the battlefield. Gears lay scattered and shattered        
 around it, and periodically, a beam of energy lances across the ground and    
 burns something from existence. That happens now, as a land battleship from   
 Aveh hurls through the air.                                                   
                                                                               
 It has been blasted through and burnt -- and it smashes into the very ground  
 before you. It shatters apart into so much debris, and makes a huge mountain  
 of fiery wreckage. You cannot possibly clear it.                              
                                                                               
 But you must climb, hack, and cut your way through -- because on the other    
 side is a final escape from the battlefield.                                  
=Dungeon Conditions: Wound====================================================
========================<* The Battle Front - Round 7 *>========================
======================< Results - The Shattered Landship >======================
Player                               Exhaustion                      Pass/Fail
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Kahm Yugh                           58 --(8)--> 66                 Fail
Force                               0   Brute   Effects: BASIC                
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Loren Voss                          65 --(3)--> 68                 Fail
Force                               0   Brute   Effects: BASIC                
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Seraphita                           69 --(6)--> 75                 Pass
Lucky Skirt                         4   Brute   Effects: None                 
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Nightburn Acklund                   73 --(6)--> 79                 Pass
Power Apple                         2   Brute   Effects: Strengthen           
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Elhaym van Houten                   55 --(5)--> 60                 Pass
Spy Purse                           1   Brute   Effects: Cleanse              
-----------------------------------< Party >------------------------------------
Leader: Kahm Yugh                   80 --(35)--> 115               Pass
Conditions: Wound(2)
Effects: Cleanse|Strengthen(1)
===============================< Dream Chasers >================================
DG: You have overcome the dungeon's trials! This run is a success!
DG: The party led by Kahm Yugh has successfully explored The Battle Front!
=============================<* The Battle Front *>=============================
========================<* CHALLENGE - The Lucky Find *>========================
|Type: Discovery   |Dungeon Ability: Conclusion|Challenge Rating: 1          | 
---------------------------< Challenge Information: >---------------------------
 As you tear your way through the battleship, you come to a room that has not  
 been shattered. The hangar is damaged and burnt, but a small number of Gears  
 sit here. They are largely unharmed -- though unarmed, and they will need     
 some repairs before they could be used in combat. However, the engines are    
 active, and you could use these to force your way out.                        
                                                                               
 OOC: Congratulations! You may each do some +request work to repair these      
 Gears and make them serviceable for a fight, if you wish.                     
=Dungeon Conditions: Treasure=================================================
<Pose Tracker> Kahm Yugh has posed.

Tearing through a battleship on foot is no mean thing, and yet the combined might of Gebler's assembled special forces-and the King of the Golem Hunters himself-is sufficient to break the hull of the thing and admit them into it's inner berths. Seraphita's unreal, element-graded strength is particularly useful in advancing, her power like the pointed tip of a spear thrust all the deeper by Loren's hurled boulder, Parbody's acid, and Nightburn's enhanced strength.

Once the reach the gear bay, things seem to calm enough to continue parley. "Wait...you're that Nightburn?" Gerun stammers, peering at the man as if in quiet recognition before returning the favor done him earlier, now imposing himself between the squad and the drifter.

"Hear me, fellow Solarians-minus that woman in the gas mask!" Gerune proclaimed, while Kahm actually facepalmed. "This man dutifully escorted me from the battlefield, taking action only because we believed you to be Kislevi agents in pursued of us! If you wish me to come quietly, you'll let him go free. Defy me, and I will make your lives difficult in the Ministry."

The Captain took all this in with a long, deep, exhale and-in spite of the command he's been happy to exert over this mission-turns towards Seraphita.

"Ma'am, i'm going to defer to your judgment in this matter. Either way, it looks like we can make use of these gears to escape with the good doctor in our custody."

<Pose Tracker> Seraphita has posed.
Seraphita has no idea who Nightburn is. It's probably because she spends most high-priority meetings picking her nose, bouncing around, spinning her chair, and/or falling asleep in Tolone or Kelvena's lap. Your mileage may vary but the truth is, her ability to retain information is pretty bad.
She's also kind of gullible and nice.
She looks at Gerune, then at Nightburn. She hums thoughtfully, and then spins on her heals, suddenly pouncing towards Nightburn. Not to attack, oh no. To hug! To TACKLEHUG, the dreaded, ultimate variant of the maneuver.
"Thank you for escorting the EMP for us, mister!!!" MVP, Seraphita, but close enough. "You're a very nice man! Of course we'll let you go!"
She eventually stops hugging, probably because Nightburn enforces it, taking Gerude by the hand and walking him back towards Kahm, Loren and Parbody like a mother walks a child to school, all cheerful and optimistic. "Yaaaay, mission successful!"
DC: Elhaym van Houten switches forms to This Is Your Elly On Drugs!
DC: Kent Hauch switches forms to Drunken Samuelh the Molotov!
<Pose Tracker> Loren Voss has posed.
Exhaling a breath from his most recent exertation, Loren shakes his head before pushing on ahead towards the ruins of the Gear hangar.
Which as it happens, makes a good place to have a little parlay. Though he takes care to shift his right hand away from his sidearm -- no sense triggering anything unecessarily -- it's not actually as if he needs a weapon to cause serious damage.
Nightburn, Nightburn. Loren mulls on this a moment, before a single recollected line from an intel report, months and months ago, comes to the forefront. Behind the faceplate, eyes widen.
Oh, Emperor.
And then the man they've gone all this distance to save speaks up.
Loren takes a deep, long breath. Holds it. Exhales. And resolutely, with all the willpower and strength he has, doesn't say a damn word.
This is incredibly difficult.
And then. Then, Kahm asks Seraphita what her judgement is. Loren holds his breath and doesn't exhale this time.
...Well, he considers in silence as she agrees to the scientist's terms. If this is what's needed for a success, he'll take it.
<Pose Tracker> Nightburn Acklund has posed.


Inwardly, Nightburn smirks. While he might have failed at his initial aim, it seems that Plan B is coming along just fine.

As Gerun pleads his case before the soldiers gathered here, the Drifter takes the moment's peace to light up another cigar. "One and the same. Ol' Gerun here ran afoul of some looters and needed a hand. We had you figured for the enemy. I can't say I got hurt, so I'm willing to call things square if he is. This little adventurer was rougher on him than me, I'd say."

Fortunately, the special unit is spared more disgrace by the pounce of a wild Seraphita. She uses Tackle Hug. It is...super effective. Which is to say, Nightburn may be a man who tangles with mechanical monsters more than twice his hight, but typically that is accomplished by *not* languishing within their vicelike grips.

The Drifter is made of firm stuff. He weathers the tackle easily enough, and manages a full ten seconds before the cigar finally pops out his his mouth. "H...Hey now little lady, I'm as happy...as any other gentleman to be...greeted that way by a lady, but..." Wheeze. "...us old men...are fragile...!"

At least the Gebler forces will be able to take that small victory home with them.

Once released, he turns back to the scientist. After picking up his cigar. "Anyway...I'd offer to stay in touch but...I'm not quite sure how pen pals work for you folks." Behind his hand, he whispers, "But I've got a few more styles of cigars to try if you can figure something out."

This is the absolute most preposterous way to ingratiate yourself to the inner workings of Solaris. But when all you're left with is Plan B, you milk it for what it's worth.