2017-08-31: We Are Not Professionals
- Log: We Are Not Professionals
- Cast: Asteroid the Kid, Kaguya, Josephine Lovelace, Layna Manydays, Lemina Ausa
- Where: November City - Downtown
- Date: August 31st 2017
- Summary: Kaguya and Asteroid had a bad time. So they're going to take it out on the populace of November City while dressed as Black Ties. Others beg to differ. For varying reasons.
<Pose Tracker> Asteroid the Kid has posed.
EARLIER, WAYSIDE
Asteroid, still feeling frustrated and angry at recent events and not particularly seeing much joy in harassing the people of Wayside any more than she already is, caught up to Kaguya.
"Hey," She said. "Want to do something fun and screw the consequences?"
EARLIER, NOVEMBER CITY
Asteroid the Kid bodily chucks a policeman out of his carriage and into the street. She is surprisingly strong for someone her size. "The system is broken!" Asteroid shouts. "Authoritarian pigs! Go eat some delicious pastries! NYA HA HA HAHA!"
She reaches up to the reins and snaps them once, getting the carriage rolling. A little sign appears in the air indicating they are now at ONE star in their WANTED rating.
NOW
Asteroid has also, it seems, put on a black tux and tie with long slacks as well as a bucket with two eyeholes in it that she is looking through since that's pretty much the only way she can be even quasi-anonymous about this, not that it's likely to last. "You got the molotovs? The molotovs are important. That's real Black Tie style when we don't have a flamethrower. Which we don't. Have a flamethrower." She asks of her companion as the carriage pushes on through the wealthier Downtown district of November City, heedless of whatever might be in the way and quickly knocking over an artisan fruit stand in short order.
"Because I have the bats." She adds, waggling one she has JUST SO HAPPENED to have driven nails and other sharp pieces of shrapnel into. She has prepared a second one for Kaguya if she so desires.
<Pose Tracker> Kaguya has posed.
EARLIER, WAYSIDE
Kaguya was easy to catch up to; she didn't really feel much like moving around, and definitely didn't want to hurt the people of Wayside. She just happened to finally get over to her flower cart when Asteroid catches up to her.
"Uh," she says, "Yeah?? Totally??"
EARLIER, NOVEMBER CITY
Kaguya the Veruni lays a hand on the other policeman with an iron grip and hurls him into a window, absurdly strong for her size and apparent condition... Especially because when she gets into the carriage, she starts coughing while Asteroid shouts. "I'm fine!" she says, "Fine!"
She reaches into a pocket and pops something into her mouth.
NOW
Kaguya, too, is wearing a black suit and black tie, and a mask to cover her face, though not her pointed ears or her golden hair. It's hard to identify her, since she's wearing platforms to conceal her height, and most people here wouldn't... know her, to begin with, but to some she might be distinctive anyway. Particularly with concealed ARM coated in black on her lap.
"I could've made us a flamethrower," Kaguya points out, "Why didn't you tell me about a flamethrower? Eh whatever, I've got the molotovs and some incendiary rounds. It'll be fine!"
"I want a bat!" Kaguya says. "Wooo Black Ties! Let's smash something!" Kaguya takes a bat and swings it at a nearby bench along the way. The bench shatters.
<Pose Tracker> Josephine Lovelace has posed.
EARLIER, NOVEMBER CITY
Did you know that carriages can be dangerous?
Very nearly, in their road rage rampage, Asteroid and Kaguya almost run down a blond young man.
"Watch where you're going--"
Is a shout that cuts off at the end, because as he stares after the carriage, he notices that it's weaving an awful lot.
And that some of the local law enforcement -- the ones not currently lying in the street up that way -- are awfully aggreived about something.
Actually, this, whatever it is, is definitely under his level of engagement, Loren thinks, opting instead get the hell out of here.
RIGHT NOW THOUGH
A certain reckless archaeologist, on the other hand, is engaging in a the time-honored tradition of smoking a goddamn cigarette, gazing up at the blue sky overhead as she leans back on the bench she's perched on here. She had tried to light up in the pub over that-a-way but they told her 'no smoking'. Yes, apparently she found the one bar that disallows smoking in the city. ...Something about fire risk, they said.
That, and the bird being a disease risk.
The bird who is currently investigating some of the scraps under the bench. Someone left a perfectly fine crust here earlier.
There's some shouting in the distance.
Right now, Josie's tuning it out. Give a girl a break, she didn't even get to order a drink.
<Pose Tracker> Layna Manydays has posed.
Way up above, as Kaguya and Asteroid go on their merry way causing havoc, a figure clad in a brightly-colored poncho observes them from the metal skeleton of the Bernadelli skyscraper.
Who was this mysterious figure? How had he managed to climb up the in-progress building without being seen? How could he possibly see anything from all the way up there?
We all know who he is, but for the sake of preserving the mystery he will not yet be named. As for the other questions...?
Allow me to distract you from them by putting focus on the person actually relevant here.
Downtown November City wasn't usually the sort of place you'd found Layna Manydays. It was...too clean, too pristine. But a place like this deserved to be explored, for it was doubtless that there would be some riches to be had here if one kept their eyes open.
After all, nothing good could come out of any place kept this clean. They were definitely trying to hide something. She had no doubt that the people keeping to themselves in those giant stone structures were probably getting up to worse crimes than the one she had a reputation for committing.
Speaking of crimes...it sounds like there are some being committed right about now. And she's not even the one committing them.
A grin, possibly unnerving to some, crosses Layna's face. Excellent, some excitement.
She begins to wander in the direction of the commotion, looking to throw a wrench into whatever plans were being cooked up here today.
She had a tendency to do that.
<Pose Tracker> Asteroid the Kid has posed.
Asteroid leans her head out to look at Loren, "SUCK IT NERD!" Asteroid, Asteroid no. You're like the nerdiest person ever. Strangely, though, she does squint faintly at the young blonde man with her yellow eyes before ultimately turning back inside.
Asteroid the Kid hands the bat to Kaguya. "I didn't know you could make flamethrowers!" It's not exactly a skill that is known to be associated with botany, even--as far as she is aware--alien botanists. "We'll do flamethrowers next time!" It's not like Asteroid the Kid has eyebrows or hair to singe off. It might be a bit wilder for Kaguya who has a Anime Cough Disease.
Asteroid says, "Nice!" as Kaguya smashes a bench. It's easy to forget that Kaguya is freakishly strong. She slows down her ride as they round a corner, passing by a jewelry store. It's actually across the street from Josephine's pub! Asteroid the Kid lights the cloth on fire and throws it through a jewelry store window. There's shouts from alarms outside as the people inside quickly stampede out of the place as the fire begins to spread (the owners do try to stamp out the fire briefly before shifting to less practical choices of trying to save their goods).
"YOU'RE NOT SAFE!" Asteroid shouts. "WAKE UP FILGAIA'S DYING!" She honks the police horn several times as the carriage speeds off again.
The universe doesn't give Josie a break (this is Filgaia after all) and the carriage speeds across a puddle in the street and sprays Josephine and Penelope OH SHIT!!!!
WANTED: TWO STARS
And that's not even counting whatever nonsense Layna will unleash.
<Pose Tracker> Kaguya has posed.
Nerd? Kaguya peers over at Asteroid and back down the street. "Huh, did we get a guy?" She can't really tell. "Whatever, he's fine. Can't even stick around. Like, we're totally watching?"
Kaguya does not see the mysterious figure on the building. Instead she puts her eyes back forward again and takes her bat, nodding brightly. "I can totally make that kind of thing! ARMs are kinda a hobby of mine," she says with a shrug, though she hasn't considered the problem of putting so much smoke and fire right at her. She may before any next time. "Totally!"
Kaguya smashes the bench and they slow down, Kaguya looking around to--"Oh!" A laugh, "So that's where we're going!" Kaguya watches people stampeding out and--more to the point--people picking up jewelry.
"Yeah, deal with it!" Kaguya says, and lights another of the cocktails to throw straight into a bank. "Hahaha--" Cough. Cough. "Uuugh--"
Kaguya swings her bat at a slowing carriage as they pass.
<Pose Tracker> Lemina Ausa has posed.
She really shouldn't be here after stealing a bunch of food. She really, really shouldn't. And yet, here she is -- Lemina Ausa is bumming around November City, trying to get a sense of... well, anything, really. The last time she was here she wasn't afforded the opportunity to see the sights, because Riesenlied did a Riesenlied and wandered toward the plot blankly.
Unfortunately, her little poke-around is interrupted unceremoniously by Black Ties, or more accurately, 'Black Ties.' She's taking a carriage behind the one Kaguya swings at -- but even seeing the violence come that cose is enough to get her to bail on her ride, because she doesn't want to get hit with any number of bats.
It's a good thing they weren't moving very fast. Once Lemina pries herself up off the ground after her unceremonious bail, she calls to the 'Black Ties,' "Isn't this a little brazen even for you guys?! Jeez -- this is gonna' be a mega-catastrophe..." (Note to self: develop 'Mega-Catastrophe' after 'Catastrophe.')
<Pose Tracker> Josephine Lovelace has posed.
EARLIER, SOMEWHAT ANYWAY
...The surface really is full of mutants, the Solarian-in-disguise thinks, retreating in the opposite direction from the ensuing chaos.
He's. Really just not getting even the slightest bit involved here.
BUT IN THE HERE AND NOW
It's a pity this isn't a good cigarette, Josie thinks, watching a little patch of cloud scoot across the sky. But supplying up for her little under-the-radar (mostly) border crossing (illegal border crossing) killed most of her funds, and resupplying in Dazil killed most of the rest. Maybe she should have stayed put there, but she'd had the feeling that a little light work might be more easy to have out this way, and so--
Under the bench, Penelope works on that crust with gusto. It's at least two days old.
wait a minute
Josie sits up straight.
Josie sits up straight just as a puddle-driven wave arcs through the air her way, driven by the wheel of a rampant carriage.
Josie sits there a second or so more, water sluicing off her, her very dampened cigarette -- not even warm enough to smolder -- still held between her gloved fingers.
Penelope goes for the rooftops, trailing droplets.
One second later a molotov strikes a bank.
Two seconds later, Josephine Lovelace, rather wet and dripping, rises slowly to her feet, wreck of a cigarette flung away.
Three seconds later, Josie has drawn her sidearm from the holster hidden under her longcoat.
And four seconds later, she's squinted one eye shut, eased off the safety, and aimed for the driver of that runaway carriage full of people throwing firebombs.
Five seconds total: she opens fire.
GS: Josephine Lovelace has attacked Asteroid the Kid with Iron Cobra 325! GS: Josephine Lovelace has completed her action. GS: Asteroid the Kid guards a hit from Josephine Lovelace's Iron Cobra 325 for 55 hit points!
<Pose Tracker> Layna Manydays has posed.
From afar, Layna observes the carriage as it drives wildly through the streets, hurling dangerous objects into buildings and just generally causing a ruckus.
So it's average thugs she's dealing with here, that's easy enough.
With a quick incantation Layna /jumps/ with the power of wind, her trajectory landing her straight on top of the carriage. The two within would probably hear a thump as she lands, then unfolds herself out into a reclining position on her side.
With a grin she peers over at the two "Black Ties", and offers a wave.
"Well now, havin' yourselves a little fun, aye? Now what bee's gone and found themselves stuck in your bonnets, aye?" She asks. "Y'know...this is a pretty dangerous thing you're doing here. Someone could get hurt, aye?"
This happens shortly before the carriage kicks up some water on an innocent(?) bystander(??) and their innocent(???) pigeon.
This may prove to drive her point in better than she could've made it.
<Pose Tracker> Asteroid the Kid has posed.
Asteroid the Kid says, "Nah, we just spooked 'em." If they hit him, he probably would be saying something more besides 'Watch where you're going'. Something like 'YAAGGGHH' or '*blood curdling scream*' or even, really, 'x.x'. But as it turns out the person who gets hurt is Asteroid the Kid and that's because of something highly unintentional.
The splashing...of a pigeon!
But first Asteroid has enough time to listen to Layna. "So? Maybe these people need to be hurt a little, eh? We ain't living in complacent times."
Layna will probably want to pull herself up shortly because Josephine is firing a gun.
The bullet slams into Asteroid's skull. Her head jerks back from the concussive force, there's a spray of dust. Asteroid slumps into Kaguya's lap for a moment. There's a hole in the bucket. The horses are trained horses so they don't go wild but they do perform 'evasive actions' onto the stree, knocking over a mailbox through the process. The sudden shift of movement might be something Layna should watch out for!
Approaching the area, another horse and carriage barrels down the street to chase after the 'Black Ties', honking horns and yelling at them to stop.
Asteroid grunts and manages tos traighten herself. She removes a scrap of the metal she attached to her bat and shoots it with a portal gun before firing the other gun at the front of the carriage.
Asteroid's yellow eyes narrow sharply as she flings the portal-shrapnel out the window as she wides. It spinds around precariously. She doesn't call out Rigdobrite's name but it's clear who she is claling on.
She fires several asteroid balls through the 'front' of the carriage--
--and they reappear through the spinning shrapnel, sending a large slew of them towards the police car, but she seems to be something of a sharpshooter herself as one asteroid ball comes crashing down towards Josephine's position!
"Hey, wasn't that Lemina?" She asks of Kaguya, cracking the whip to speed the carriage up. "She said 'mega-catastrophe', that's Lemina, right?"
She considers this for a moment before leaning out, bucket on head, and waving a hand at Lemina to show that she's a friendly dangerous person. To Lemina, at least.
"You have many talents." She adds to Kaguya.
GS: Asteroid the Kid has attacked Josephine Lovelace with Asteroid Ball! GS: Asteroid the Kid has completed her action. GS: Josephine Lovelace takes a solid hit from Asteroid the Kid's Asteroid Ball for 91 hit points!
<Pose Tracker> Kaguya has posed.
Kaguya is at least lucky enough not to inhale Josie's smoke too much as they move along. She doesn't much like smoke. ...Which is a funny way to be while setting things on fire, but it's apparently the done thing. Besides...
"Oh yeah. I guess," she answers Asteroid. "He's fine. Whatever."
In the meantime Kaguya misses Lemina's presence, which is just as well for the moment, because there's a lot else to think about. Her time will come. Right now, the time is for Josie who she also misses, and for Layna. Layna, who bumps along on the carriage and Kaguya blinks. "Huh? Hey, that's cheating," Kaguya says with a frown, and then coughs again. Fun... "Like I care if these people get hurt?" she asks, as if it's the most ridiculous possible thing. "What if I don'twant to tell you? It would take a while. And maybe I am having--"
She cuts off immediately as Asteroid falls into her lap with a gunshot, heart in her throat. "Hey? Hey!" And there are more honking t them immediately. Kaguya practically growls, and Layna can see her sharp, sharp teeth.
But Asteroid is fine. "Don't worry me like that you mega-jerk!" Kaguya says, and shoves Asteroid lightly, starting to stand up to climb onto the carriage up with Layna, and gets out her bat. She does not wave at Lemina. "I know I have many talents!" she says.
"And one of them is--" Kaguya swings her bat straight at Layna, aiming to 'bat' her right off of the carriage. "Nothing personal--Oh who am I kidding, it's totally personal!"
GS: Kaguya has attacked Layna Manydays with BAT! GS: Kaguya has completed her action. GS: Layna Manydays guards a hit from Kaguya's BAT for 53 hit points!
<Pose Tracker> Lemina Ausa has posed.
It is in fact most definitely Lemina!
... Who doesn't quite realize that the 'Black Ties' in front of her are Astie and Kaguya for a few seconds. She's waved to, and has to pause... stare blankly... and eventually, after working through some complete bafflement... waves back. It's at this point that she sees Astie's head, given the gunshot, and begins to process what's going in.
"... When did you join the Black Ties?!" she asks, drawing the complete wrong conclusion but also the one that most fits the actual presented data for the moment. "And, like... why? They aren't even that good at fire!"
Lemina has fire-related standards.
She doesn't attack yet, instead moving a little closer and saying, "Come on! Cut that out! You can't just -- throw explosions at whatever and get in shootouts!!" Lemina... is the one trying the diplomatic approach while everyone else piles on? What is even happening.
GS: Lemina Ausa has attacked Lemina Ausa with Really Lemina! GS: Lemina Ausa has completed her action. GS: Lemina Ausa takes a solid hit from Lemina Ausa's Really Lemina for 0 hit points!
<Pose Tracker> Josephine Lovelace has posed.
Well, that, the tragic loss of her crappy cigarette, and the sudden throwing of firebombs. Josie might have an extremely relative sense of morality, but in all honesty it's the last one that was the clincher for EXTREME VIOLENCE.
Which might be a problem for her once the authorities get themselves involved, but.
Josie's never been all that interested in future consequences.
Her aim is true; the carriage skids the hell all over the place as the horses react to SUDDEN VIOLENCE. Lowering the ARM a touch, Josie squints at the carriage through the brilliance and takes one step forward.
She's still somewhat sodden.
"Uh."
And, as it happens, about to find out what it's like to take a direct hit to the skull from a random tiny meteoroid.
THWACK. It's a dead-on hit, one that sends the tall archaeologist reeling, bad hand flung out for the stability of the nearby bench as she watches what looks like about two or three carriages sprawling their way out into the distance.
Josie squints.
Josie thinks about this.
Josie doesn't think about this for very long. Righting herself and staggering (somewhat) for the nearest horse, Josie avails herself of a FREE HORSE*
(*not actually a free horse)
and after unhitching it hops on up.
She's not sure what the hell just happened back there but she's pretty sure the ladies in the carriage just hit her in the head with a rock. This is something she's not going to put with up, so to speak.
"It's on," she mutters, urging her definitely free steed onwards.
"Hey, that's my horse!" someone yells, far too late.
Penelope, high and semi-dry, grooms uncaring of the chaos below.
A little too late, Josie realizes she hasn't thought this out very well, particularly the part where she needs a hand to steer the horse and needs a hand to shoot, but it's a little late for regrets.
"You know," she calls out, urging the steed onwards before releasing the reins and once again drawing the sidearm. "I really think this is a bit much." So she says, as she attempts to pull up alongside, urging the horse along with only her knees, "Firebombs, really? I don't really know who you are or what you think you're trying to pull here but--"
The sidearm lifts.
"Maybe it's time you give it a rest, okay~?" She smiles. Pleasantly. ...Almost. "Just think about it. ...'Cause you two are really pissing me off right now!"
The crack is astonishingly loud as Josie once again opens fire.
This is now a driveby shooting.
GS: Josephine Lovelace has attacked Asteroid the Kid with Have a Blast! GS: Josephine Lovelace has completed her action.
<Pose Tracker> Layna Manydays has posed.
Layna sort of rolls her eyes at their responses.
"Aye, maybe they do. But who're you to decide that?"
It is at this point that the carriage shakes slightly. Layna huffs, lowering a hand to hold on a bit tighter. Fortunately, she's used to keeping her balance on ships rocking in the sea, so this isn't too crazy compared to that she's used to. The sound of gunfire causes her to pull her head up real quick, though.
She winces. She imagined that the bucket-wearing one probably wasn't going to-
Oh. She's just fine?
Oh well.
It is at this point that the shorter one climbs up to meet her. With a grin, Layna gets to her feet, her stance making it clear that she's used to this.
She reaches behind her, drawing out the shielded gauntlets she tends to stick with.
She interlocks them and brings them forward to intercept Kaguya's bat, wincing slightly as it collides with them. This...causes her to reevaluate the threat level, a little bit. She hadn't expected the well-dressed scrawny thug to be able to put that much strength into a swing, but...well, here they were.
"Also, I was being facetious before. When I said someone might get hurt..." Layna thrusts her shields forward suddenly, attempting to ram them into Kaguya. "I meant the two of you specifically, get it?"
She does, however, ready herself to grab onto one of Kaguya's arms if it looks like she's about to fall off from the impact. That might hurt a little more than she wanted it to, and she didn't want this fight to end just yet.
Off to the side she spies the supposedly-innocent bystander astride the horse and carrying a gun. Layna sends her a grin, but quickly returns her attention to Kaguya.
GS: Layna Manydays has attacked Kaguya with Plundering! GS: Layna Manydays has completed her action. GS: Kaguya takes a solid hit from Layna Manydays's Plundering for 98 hit points! GS: Asteroid the Kid takes a solid hit from Josephine Lovelace's Have a Blast for 131 hit points!
<Pose Tracker> Asteroid the Kid has posed.
Asteroid's bucket is still covering her head but, well, the portal guns are pretty clearly an Asteroid invention. There's a startling LACK of blood from where she was shot, but frankly the pure IMPACt of the shot was probably enough to rattle her brain (if she... has one?) and that means being stunned for a time.
"Sorry," Asteroid says to Kaguya. "I wasn't expecting to be shot!" Well, not shot by a pigeon anyway. Wait, no, it was the lady. Okay, Asteroid may still be jumbled.
She is pushed away but she grins with her own fanged mouth (that's how you know they're dangerous) as she sees Kaguya swinging a bat about.
"When we put the clothes on! And because they dress mega-fancy!" This is now the third time that someone mega-talked like mega-this already so that means it's spreading. "I'm not throwing explosions at whatever! I'm throwing explosions at THE MAN!"
Of course Josephine is not THE MAN but, to be fair, Josephine shot her in the head.
"I don't even know who you are!?" Asteroid shouts at Josephine as the latter fires again, catching Asteroid in the arm. This time she DOES start bleeding and Asteroid hisses through her sharp teeth before calling upon Rigdobrite's power AGAIN and unleashing a wave of--
--cartoony yellow starts that come crashing down cutely for Josephine. Some of them have smiley faces on them because it's really this kind of attack.
MEANWHILE, one of the carriages has been smashed to bits thanks to Asteroid's meteor strike but the two other carriages are taking another route to try and head everybody off.
"Jim, Doesn't this usually happen on Saturdays?" One officer asks.
"There's more crime on saturday, but the crazy crimes are always on weekdays, private. Looks like we've got a horse thief too on the loose." The other adds.
"Why not us?" Asteroid says. "It's not like everybody doesn't just do what they wanna do anyway..."
She manages to get the horses under control but aside from leaving small craters in the streets, she at least doesn't throw another cocktail. She IS reaching for for one though.
GS: Asteroid the Kid has attacked Josephine Lovelace with Starry Night! GS: Asteroid the Kid has completed her action. GS: Josephine Lovelace takes a solid hit from Asteroid the Kid's Starry Night for 116 hit points!
<Pose Tracker> Kaguya has posed.
"We probably should've expected to be shot," Kaguya points out. But Lemina asks a question and Kaguya frowns at her. "What? I'm wearing a mask!" she complains. "Ugh, an'tcount on anyone to keep a secret--" She does not particularly answer the question, however. Instead...
"Uh, I'm pretty sure I can do exactly that!" she complains at Lemina about shootouts and explosions. But... Well, she doesn't have a lot of time to shout at her when she's advancing on Layna, who is definitely bigger than her and holding weapons.
Layna may be used to this, but Kaguya definitely isn't, woozy on her feet and careful in her platforms. Her shoes have good traction at least. "Look..." SWING!
Kaguya smirks at the wince, and then blinks a moment at Layna. Layna starts to talk aboutbeing facetious, but mostly she rams her, and Kaguya stumbles backward as she tries to dodge and fails, shifting partway out of the way and held up by Layna's arm. "H-hey!"
She flails again and stumbles back onto the carriage properly, slamming hard onto her knees as she does. "Fine, fine, hurt whatever you want. I mean, that's fair."
She shoves the bat under her arm and pulls a black-covered shotgun, barrel shining, to clack open the chamber and shove in a strange, multicolored cartridge.
"But I can hurt people too." A laugh, "If you even count."
She fires, and the bright colorful round of light that comes out burns like acid where it touches.
She shouts to Josie next, "And good! I've got more of them where that came from!"
GS: Kaguya has attacked Layna Manydays with Prism Canister! GS: Kaguya has completed her action. GS: Layna Manydays takes a solid hit from Kaguya's Prism Canister for 112 hit points! GS: Poison! Statuses applied to Layna Manydays!
<Pose Tracker> Asteroid the Kid has posed.
"I expected to be shot at by the cops," Asteroid says. "Not some middle-aged pigeon lady!" Thirty might as well be three hundred let's be real.
<Pose Tracker> Lemina Ausa has posed.
Lemina... just buries her face in her dumb little hands. This is a catastrophe. ... she hasn't recognized Kaguya yet, but 'a portal-gun-user whose head expels rock dust when assaulted' could only be so many people. "UUuuUUGH," she says -- and at this point she does feel the need to actually do things about it. Even if she had a good experience with Astie, well...
... some things can't stand.
Lemina sighs, pulls out her staff, and starts chanting. "Sorry, but unless you guys can calm down, it looks like I'm going to have to put you..." Dramatic sting! "... on ice." SIGH.
Thrusting her staff out toward the carriage, Lemina aims ashard of ice for Asteroid; it's small, and really mostly there to go 'hey knock it off,' rather than cause any serious, lasting injury. ... on the other hand it's still an ice shard.
GS: Lemina Ausa has attacked Asteroid the Kid with Ice Pick! GS: Lemina Ausa has completed her action. GS: Asteroid the Kid guards a hit from Lemina Ausa's Ice Pick for 62 hit points!
<Pose Tracker> Josephine Lovelace has posed.
"That makes the two of us! I don't know you either, kiddo! But you know what? It doesn't--"
"--Wha?"
There are a lot of stars suddenly.
A whole hell of a lot of stars. She would swear, for an instant, that some of them are even grinning happily as the stream past.
What sort of magic is this, Josie thinks in passing, all of her training slipping away as she tries -- gritting her teeth, leaning in as the horse (now officially Panicked) attempts to bolt and take her past her current target -- to bear up against the force of the spell.
Did we imply already that this wasn't going to work? Because it doesn't work. Josie, astride a now-wild horse, hisses as the magical impressions of celestial objects sear, burn, and cut.
Oh, right, she realizes dimly, a faint recollection bubbling up from a lesson a very, very long time ago. Guardian magic. Of course, it's Guardian magic.
The horse attempts to dart away from the carriage. Lifting her head from where she was hunched over the steed, she realizes that she's about to have a larger problem. With the horse officially out of control, there's not going to be much room for her to evade the little roadblock up ahead. Not at this speed.
"More of 'em, huh..." she utters, casting a gaze sidelong at Kaguya.
And there is a brief moment of silence. "...Middle-aged?"
She reaches a hand into her pocket. Her right hand. And comes up with a handful of bullets.
Her gaze flicks ahead. Problems: increasing. "Guess this is the end of the line. Y'know kids, if you picked some normal way to rebel, like, oh..."
The service revolver is flicked handily in her left, exposing the chamber. One by one, the bullets are loaded.
Other things that are a little tricky to do on horseback:
Loading a gun.
"I dunno, joyride? Vandalize a store? Stuff like that. Anyway, I wouldn't care what you did, but--"
She pauses just long enough to flash a grin at Layna and Lemina. It's all yours now, it seems to suggest.
"What can I say? I can't have with you kids setting people on fire."
The shots come quickly, one after another, the sidearm holstered quickly after as Josie reaches down sharply to reclaim the reins.
"Anyway, this looks like my stop, so we'll have to have this one out later. I can't go get arrested now, you know~!"
With that, she ducks her head down and URGES the still panicking horse onwards. Through the temporary barricade. Well, if you can't duck, just charge on through.
Hopefully the local law enforcement will just pick on the bigger fish here instead (particularly with all the spells now floating around), but who knows!?
As with many things in life, it is a mystery.
GS: Josephine Lovelace has activated a Force Action! GS: Josephine Lovelace has attacked Asteroid the Kid with Bitter Pill! GS: Josephine Lovelace has completed her action. GS: CRITICAL! Asteroid the Kid takes a solid hit from Josephine Lovelace's Bitter Pill for 143 hit points! GS: Poison! Statuses applied to Asteroid the Kid!
<Pose Tracker> Layna Manydays has posed.
Layna listens to the shouting, even that which isn't directed at her, but her attention is primarily on Kaguya. Where did all of that strength come from? ...Well, there wasn't too much time to think about that.
"Heh. Aye, that's fair. Can't say I've ever let anyone tell me what I can or can't do." Layna comments with a grin, glancing in the direction of Asteroid's voice. "'Course, if you're doing this just 'cause you want to, you're just making yourselves out to be a problem that needs to be solved, aye?"
Her attention is quickly turned toward Kaguya as the bat is put away and replaced with...some manner of ARM. Layna eyes it warily. She didn't have much personal experience with ARMs, but...they never lead to anything good.
This one certainly didn't. She tries to dodge the light that fires from it, but the top of the carriage doesn't really offer a whole lot of space to manuever.
It's hard to tell if this hiss came from Layna herself or the impact as she backs up slightly, grabbing at her shoulder.
"Alright, little lass...I was gonna play nicely, but if you're gonna be like that..." Layna rushes forward. It looks like she's going for another ram...but she actually takes one shield and sweeps it toward her legs, aiming to knock her off-balance - pausing a moment to return Josie's grin - before attempting to shoulder-check her right back into the front seat with Asteroid.
"...Then I think I oughta put you in time-out!"
She notably doesn't use the arm that Kaguya shot. She seems to be nursing that one a bit.
GS: Layna Manydays has attacked Kaguya with Swab the Decks! GS: Layna Manydays takes 4 damage from Poison! GS: Layna Manydays has completed her action. GS: Kaguya takes a solid hit from Layna Manydays's Swab the Decks for 153 hit points!
<Pose Tracker> Asteroid the Kid has posed.
It's full of stars...
Asteroid the Kid already thinks Josephine and Layna are pretty cool characters but they're pretty cool characters that are shooting at her and, well, it's hard to see at what's happening ON TOP of the carriage exactly. Still, it's not like the lectures are WRONG, exactly, but Asteroid is acting out on emotion rather than logic. She's hurting. And she sees these people in a particular manner.
"These people, they look down on drifters, they leave us to rot with diseases or burn in the wastes, trying nothing to help...So we ARE joyriding, we ARE vandalizing!" She may not have considered the possible dangers of throwing molotovs but Josephine blasts her good in the chest twice, sending Asteroid bumping into Kaguya again if she's thrown into the backseat, but this time he's bleeding heavily. This is a serious wound. She might not be able to just fix it herself. "Dammit..." She mutters under her breath.
Lemina follows up with a less serious but more terrible wound by flinging an ice shard into Asteroid's head. Her head promptly flashes as an ice cube forms around Asteroid's head and she gets the equivalent of an ice cream headache! Minus the lovely ice cream! "gNahaaaaaahhhh!" Asteroid says, looking over to Lemina again.
She mega doesn't want to hurt Lemina. More to the point, with how much she's bleeding, maybe she shouldn't hurt Lemina on a PRACTICAL level either. "I know you're an alien!" Asteroid shouts at her. "You said so! I know you're from the same people who experimented on me! You look like them! THE HAIR!!! Why don't you speak your alien toooongue??" She may be getting a little confused from blood loss.
Asteroid smashes the ice cube surrounding her head by slamming her head against the side of her window and adds, "Kags! I think we gotta get outta here! But I have an idea! Get on a horse and take the reins off!" There's plenty of sharp metal to use if Kaguya doesn't have a knife but she has super strength, so it shouldn't be too hard right?
Asteroid grabs the top of the carriage and crawls towards one of the horses.
She throws herself onto the leftmost horse, riding that rather than guiding trough the reins.
"Rigdobrite..." She murmurs. "Grant me the power... TO EXTEND!"
Her portal pistols glow with a bright yellow light but she waits for Kaguya to be in position. Once that happens, though, she fires two more portals. One very large one splashes against the side of a high fashion boutique store. The other right in the ground behind them as they gain a lead on the carriage.
Which promptly tumbles in to the street portal--
--then flies out of the store portal at high dangerous speeds!
Well at least it's not a bomb. Hopefully Layna will have figured to get off the carriage in the meanwhile, or have found some other method of absconding what is about to happen.
<Pose Tracker> Kaguya has posed.
Kaguya isn't sure whether she's been recognized, but she sure doesn't want to be. ...She also doesn't especially want whatever Lemina is doing. "On ICE?" Kaguya complains. "Oh, come on! You could've at least used 'cool off' instead of 'calm down'!"
Why is Kaguya helping? Well, she's in pain and not doing all that well, despite the success she's having against the more experienced combatant before her. This is supposed to be fun.
But Josie too has a lot to say, and Kaguya doesn't show any more firebombs but she sure has them. "Come on," Kaguya comments, "Pigeon lady's not that old, probably. I bet she's only 40." Kaguya is... not very good with human ages, truthfully. She gets a ballpark, but...
But admits all this yelling, Kaguya can hear Josie's too. Kids. Normal ways, "There isn't a normal way to rebel!" Kaguya frowns. "And I'm not rebelling!" ...Is she? Well, maybe a little. She doesn't like it much. But Asteroid says they're joyriding and vandalizing, and Kaguya agrees, except, "And what do you have to say about--" Bang bang bang. Kaguya takes another few bullets to the chest, to the shoulder, to the arm, and sucks in a breath, staggering. "Aah--"
Layna speaks up, and Kaguya narrows her eyes. "Yeah, you get it. Go ahead and solve me. You can't anyway."
She smirks as her gun works though... But she isn't smirking after. "I'm not LITTLE!" Kaguya shouts, and gets hit rushed had, standing to get knocked straiht down and tumbling down into the seat. "Aaugh--"
leeding heavily and bruised, Kaguya spends the next few moments dazed, with a hacking cough that doesn't at all sound well, and not from her injuries. "Yeah these people... suck..." But Kaguya finds herself looking over at Asteroid as she starts ranting. "Uh, are you okay--" A horse. Take the reins off. "All right!"
Sucking in another breath, Kaguya focuses, and green wind studded flower petals rushes up around her, making her swifter, more graceful as she moves for the exit, for that horse. She leaps, and almost glides there, yanking on the reins until they burst.
Her bat is left with Layna, unfortunately.
"I thought about what you said," she coughs up at Layna and Lemina, "And you've got some good points! I'm out of here!"
She almost seems smug, except for the obvious pain she's in. Asteroid finishes up...
Kaguya rides as hard as she can.
<Pose Tracker> Lemina Ausa has posed.
Lemina looks back toward Josie, still keeping up in a Chiro Sandal-assisted jog, and is legitimately unsure what to say for a moment. She settles for, "... Yeah let's get out of here," because despite the fact that her bounty is a staggering, magnificent 26 gella, it's still a bounty and she's still pretty sure Althena's Guard would legit do a murder to her on sight.
...Fotunately, by the time she gets her feet under her and going, Asteroid and Kaguya have elected to start abandoning their carriage in favor of riding off on their own. Kaguya offers unsolicited pun advice -- and Lemina...
... has to give her credit. "... Yeah, sure, I'm not at the top of my game today. It's mega-hard to ride from town to town quickly!" she declares, before remembering that it's probably best if she starts her own escape.
As a result, she decides to pop out her umbrella and use it to mask as much of herself as possible from as many angles as possible. It's not a real disguise, but...
<Pose Tracker> Layna Manydays has posed.
"Well, this behavior sure ain't helping! You're just reinforcing what they think of you!" Layna calls down to Asteroid.
Layna doesn't respond to Kaguya right away, instead grinning down at her from atop the carriage.
"Are you sure about that? Looks like I'm doin' a pretty good job of it so far, aye?" She replies arrogantly, and leans down to collect the abandoned bat. It's when she straightens back up that she realises something - Asteroid and Kaguya are no longer in the carriage, and it's running out of control without anything to guide it.
Layna curses and recites an incantation before leaping off the carriage in much the same way she had gotten onto it - with a powerful gust of wind that carries her to safety. She winces slightly from the injury to her other arm, but bears with it.
From where she's landed, she decides that Josie and Lemina have the right idea. It miiight be a good idea to skedaddle while the skedaddlin's good. She turns and walks away, resting the bat against her good shoulder and whistling innocently.
...Honestly, it's not really her type of weapon. She'll have to return it next time she sees that girl. Of course, depending on how their conversation goes she might be returning it at high-velocity...but still.
Way up above, the mysterious poncho-wearing figure nods quietly to himself. He had done his part, to ensure that they didn't get themselves killed or arrested.
And he didn't even have to do anything!
He turns away, disappearing dramatically.
Not shown - Ambrosius spending a good amount of time trying to make his way down the skyscraper.